Atonement

Chapter 1 - Apart

Disclaimer: I do not own Psycho Pass, it obviously belongs to Gen Urobuchi

Disclaimer 2: Cover image is drawn by Rera, a talented graphic artist, who does great fanarts of Psycho Pass. I recommend you to check her work on Pixiv :)

PS: I haven't seen the SS specials nor the third season when I started to write this story. It takes place just after the first movie

Nobuchika Ginoza couldn't remember which particular detail initiated his suspicions about Inspector Tsunemori. Since their return from SEAUn, a few subtle changes in her behavior began to startle him. She seemed more lost in her thoughts. Less present. Some of her reactions almost resigned. He didn't have to be a detective to conclude that something was wrong. This unusual distance hid something deeper.

During their official Shambala Fleet debriefs, he explained to her his pursuit of Kogami - especially its outcome. Both of them knew his presented version wasn't the truth, however both pretended otherwise. Stoic, she typed in her distinctive professional manner his testimony into the Sibyl database. His Dominator damaged by the fight against the terrorist, Kogami's proper arrest was rendered impossible. Disarmed and unable to contain him, Ginoza had no other choice but to let him go after a wearing struggle. He was simply too strong for him. Tsunemori did not press him to know more, nor challenged some of his vague story details. She did not look as concerned as he expected by the mention of her former Enforcer, despite their tight relationship. Well, in their own way. Her only reaction was a weak resigned smile as she finalized her report.

Ginoza wasn't blind. The strong connexion they shared wasn't a secret to anyone, even if its exact nature was still a mystery. At that time he purposefully chose not to understand them, preferring to systematically oppose their closeness. The fact that Tsunemori chose a latent criminal over him - despite his insistant warnings - might had something to do with his mindless reject. The atypical alchemy she shared with Kogami couldn't be ignored though. But Ginoza could not help but to take it personally. After a time, he decided to leave them alone; maybe just to protect his rattling brain from exploding.

He did not know the reason why the inspector entrusted him with Kogami's fate back to Shambala Fleet. She let him choose instead of her, allowing him to treat him as he wished to. He was persuaded that she would rather took this opportunity to confront him at last and bring him back herself to Japan, whatever the cost. Surely she knew Ginoza would decide otherwise. Unless she counted on him to take the decision she couldn't bear to do herself, unable to let Kogami go ... To finally admit he would never come back, even tough she must have guessed it a long time ago already. Maybe she also wished to spare his former colleague from Sibyl's judgment. This fateful day against Makashima, Kogami sealed his destiny with a life sentence in the eyes of the system. In retrospect, Ginoza imagined it probably was a bit of everything.

Since this last conversation about Kogami, this subject was never brought down again by Tsunemori. There was a time where Ginoza would not have interfered. Not anymore. It was before this strange protective need that he felt for her, growing through the years. Something was clearly wrong. Beneath her polite thanks, he always wondered if she did not in fact blamed him for his decision. That she viewed him as the final nail in Kogami's desertion. But being as she is, Tsunemori was potentially unable to hold a grudge against someone. Ginoza suspected than she would rather chastised herself than to voice any anger against him. Even disappointment. This wasn't healthy.

His vigilance increased.

Throughout the next months, the already thin enthusiasm and spontaneousness of his superior became even more distant. Tsunemori rarely smiled. Her work and missions seemed to be conducted in a worryingly automated manner. Her eyes once so powerful were now becoming empty. They were only brought to life once in a while, when she successfully enforced Sibyl's judgment. Which for her meant to give a last redemption chance to the suspects, madness she alone would risk. Ginoza was observing her in silence, keeping his fears for himself. He still struggled to determine if it was a short discouragement phase that would sort it out by itself, or if it meant a graver issue.

It did not improved. Thinking again about Kogami's betrayal, he was boiling inside. His former colleague chose to abandon them, despite all the tearful consequences that followed. Even though for the second time, Ginoza did not really leave him a choice. Kogami did not fought it hard anyway...

Ginoza was convinced that stopping things back then was the best choice to help Tsunemori move on. But given the miserable specter that haunted her every steps, he wasn't so sure anymore. He probably underestimated her pain. Unless the suffering tormenting her was different. As strong as she may be, the lonely burden she seemed to bear on her shoulder since a long time finally caught up with her. It overwhelmed her for years, even tough Ginoza did not know what is was. Maybe the hope of seeing Kogami's return has been the last remaining barrier to keep it away. He shivered at the thought. No, she was still strong. Maybe stronger than anyone will ever be.

Despite the obvious deterioration of her morale, her Pyscho Pass hue was still obscenely light. Akane Tsunemori remained a mystery for Ginoza. One he was now looking to pierce instead of flee. The former inspector had a faint idea why he was so curious but refused to recognize it. His protection impulse was only professional. And friendly. He had grown to get to know her, to appreciate her. Nothing more.

It was only when the cigarette smell stopped emanating from her that he knew for certain the seriousness of her condition. Those which Kogami used to smoke. Those she daily lit next to her, as a commemorative incense. Those which wore an even more stronger symbolic than just a reminder of her former Enforcer. Ginoza wasn't that close to Tsunemori, but even him suspected that this strange olfactive ritual held an intense meaning for her. Despite health risks associated to smoking (even passive), no one in the team contested it. These cigarettes remained linked to their losses in those troubled times, and especially the way Tsunemori faced them. Her friend Yuki, Kagari and his father as well. Ginoza avoided to remember him, still scarred by this trauma. Those events altered them all in various ways: they have never been the same afterwards. Tsunemori included, even if her faith in her work remained. She held fast. Unlike him. As she seemed to be on the verge of rejoining him, he will not let her follow the same path.

Silent as usual, the Enforcer discretely studied her from his desk as she was losing herself in work - probably finalizing another report. Her amber eyes formerly shining in pure energy were dull. Her face once so expressive seemed like a lifeless mask. Her state was getting worse. He couldn't recognize her, but was getting used to this impression. Her deterioration had even gained her surroundings, a morose atmosphere floating around her. Ginoza surprisingly realized the recurrence of this dreadful feeling towards his inspector: every month he would dwelt on her condition. But wouldn't move. He knew exactly what was going on beneath his own eyes.

His blood froze at the idea of losing her like this. Not Tsunemori ... Too many of whose close to him had left, one way or another. He couldn't tolerate more without at least trying to save them.

All of this worried him at a level he could not admit. Deeply introvert, Ginoza avoided at all cost to meddle in others' lives. Unless when he perceived an imminent risk, high enough to counterbalance his discrete instincts. The former inspector had kept away too many people that mattered to him. Results have been disastrous. To hell with uncertainties. He ignored what could happened, if he was the right person to act or even if he would succeed but ... one thing was clear: he could not let her drove afloat anymore. His hidden support proved to be insufficient. He had to rescue her, one way or another.

Kogami was not there anymore, but he did.

Ginoza stood up.

A/N: It took a lot to finally obtain a reaction from him ahaha! I'm not an english speaker, I hope I did not made too many mistakes, let me know if I did (so I can progress, and it is also valid for my global writing, I love constructive criticism ;p) I hope you enjoyed it, bear with me, I like to develop my beginnings before going more into feelings and action.

I wonder if there are still many readers in this fandom (probably more than in French). But I couldn't help but to give birth to this story, troubled by the end of the movie. And there is something powerful in the Ginaka ship (maybe Ginoza's tremendous Character Development, and never ending feeling of sadness coming from Akane after Kogami left. Ok, her discovery about Sibyl's truth had a lot to do with it too. But I'm a hopeless romantic). Anyway ... See you soon, I hope :)