AN: Romantic Pairings here will be: Kelsier/Mare and Dockson/Kelsier.
PART ONE:
Dockson-Kelsier-Mare-Marsh
According to the Terris people, the concept of soulmates pre-dates the Lord Ruler. If this claim has an element of truth, it would attest to the belief that the Lord Ruler is not omnipotent.
Scholar Junis, Soulmates: Death to An Empire.
[Banned Book No. 456]
Dockson stared at the red string wrapped around his smallest finger. He could barely feel it—just a soft touch, a light brushing on his skin. It stretched out, drifting through the air and connecting to the individual across from him, chosen to be soulmate— by who knows what. It had been a mistake. He hadn't been expecting visitors so late in the night, so he'd taken off his gloves and forgotten to put them on when there'd been a knock on his door. He'd left his ledgers and opened the door only for it to appear.
No.
No.
Dockson wanted to scream. No, it wasn't fair . Of all people to be his soulmate, it had to be him.
His soulmate looked up, smiling. He looked excited. Dockson wanted to smile back, he really did but all he could feel was an intense pain that settled in his chest, crushing his lungs. He'd been in love with him for years , and had settled to just being friends. Finding out he was his soulmate just made it worse, so much worse.
Because his best friend, his soulmate, was getting married the next day to somebody else.
Kelsier was in love with someone else
Marsh had met her first when recruiting for the rebellion against the Lord Ruler. She'd been a Misting and they'd always had need of another allomancer on their side. Mare had been her name.
It had been almost too easy to fall in love with her. She'd had a natural energy that drew people in and Marsh had found himself trapped in her snare.
So it wasn't a surprise when Kelsier fell for her as well.
Brothers had a natural tendency to compete. Marsh and Kelsier weren't so different, and this time, it was for the affection for a woman they both had feelings for. When Marsh had discovered him and Mare were soulmates, he'd been ecstatic.
But then—she'd chosen him.
Of course she'd chosen Kelsier. Everyone else did. It made sense she would too. Kelsier was the charismatic one, the bold one. The brother that could draw people in and make them do what he wanted without the slightest twitch of his conscience, as long as he got what he wanted in the end. Even him helping the rebellion had been for personal gain. Still, no one could deny he was successful in his endeavors and Marsh—Marsh couldn't deny that Kelsier loved Mare. So he withdrew and threw himself into his work.
Anything to pull his mind from self-pity and despair it would sometimes slip in.
Kelsier watched Breeze and Hammond size each other up. The chances of one finding their soulmate was slim to none, especially for skaa. The fact that his crew had three pairs now—was a miracle in itself. Strangely enough, all three pairs were platonic soulmates.
Well at least, openly they were.
Kelsier knew his brother had feelings for Mare. Marsh had spoken fondly of her before Kelsier had even met her. Kelsier hadn't expected to fall himself but unlike Marsh, he didn't give up when he wanted something. When the bond between Mare and Marsh was revealed, Kelsier had felt a small panic. But Mare had chosen him and despite his brother's heartbreak, Kelsier found himself ecstatic.
He knew Marsh would get over it in time. Hopefully without any bitterness between them.
It had been a small wedding with very few guests. No point in drawing attention to themselves. Sazed had led them through the ceremony, quoting the words spoken in the Larsta religion Mare followed.
"A flower cannot blossom without sunshine, and man cannot live without love."
After the ceremony, they'd moved to one of their safehouses for the after party. Food and drinks were shared, a toast to the newly wedded couple and they'd broken off into groups, laughing and having a good time—well most of them were.
Mare fondled the chain hanging around her neck. It was a threaded necklace of pink and green—an odd combination of colours but her favourite nonetheless. The ball was made of wood painted silver but her favourite part was the pendant. She's not sure how it was possible but it was made of glass and was shaped like the flower in the picture she treasured. The 'roots' of the flower wrapped around the ball and the flower dangled beneath. It was Kelsier's wedding gift to her and it was now her most prized possession. She teared up every time she stole a glance at the pendant resting on her chest.
Staring at the eight guests, Mare couldn't help but feel guilty. Despite the absolute joy she felt at marrying the love of her life, she couldn't help that flicker in her heart as she watched Dockson and Marsh whisper together in low voices, a drink in each of their hands. The other end of her soulmate bond flickered with the grief Marsh was feeling and clearly trying to suppress so as to not ruin her day. She wanted to send down feelings of comfort but she knew it would just make it worse.
"Dox's my soulmate," Kelsier had told her the night before. They'd been sitting in her room, last minute changes on their next mission keeping her up, when Kelsier came back from his best friend's room.
"Oh," she'd simply said. She'd looked up as he'd moved to sit next to her.
"He's in love with me."
Kelsier had stared at his fingers while he whispered the words. Mare knew he was feeling Dockson's emotions at the moment and couldn't help but sympathize, being in the same situation herself.
"I know."
How could she not have known? Dockson stared at him exactly how she stared at Kelsier.
Now, she watched the two heartbroken men sit together celebrating the people they loved marry someone else.
Sazed walked towards them, his hands folded before him. Mare released a relieved breath. Sazed would know what to tell them—how to soothe them.
Mare felt arms come around her and she smiled, leaning into her new husband's embrace. Kelsier kissed her cheek and Mare sighed. A foreign feeling of pain washed through her and she closed her eyes, trying with all her might to ignore it.
It was a quiet night. Their latest scam had pulled through and the crew had celebrated well into the night. Kelsier and Mare were snuggled together in their bed, slightly tipsy, trying and failing to quiet their snorts of laughter.
"What do you think?" Mare asked, blinking heavily. The wine settled heavily in her stomach. She'd made the mistake of flaring tin during the celebration when she'd thought she'd heard someone approaching the hideout. She was still reeling from that sudden sensory overload while drinking wine.
Kelsier laughed at her and Mare frowned and lightly slapped his upper arm.
"I'm serious!"she slurred.
Kelsier reached across their bed and pulled her closer, leaning his forehead on hers. Their breaths mingled together and Mare wrinkled her nose at the smell. She was still sensitive.
"A daughter? Really?" Kelsier said, a slight slur in his voice as well.
"Yes!" Mare exclaimed. "I'll teach her how to act like a noblewoman as well as a thief."
Kelsier looked to be thinking about it, his eyes slightly glazed over. "And I can teach her how to castrate men using a fork."
Mare laughed.
"So? What do you say?"
Kelsier sighed. "If things change, definitely. I just can't imagine bringing a child into the world we live in."
Mare hummed softly, running her hand up and down his arm. "One day, the sun will shine yellow, the grass will be green and we'll chase our daughter through a flower filled field, just like her name."
Kelsier smiled—the thought of green grass still an unusual concept- and pulled her closer. Mare settled closely into him and let herself feel secure in his arms.
"We're not naming her Flower, Mare."
"Yes—we are. Or at least a type of flower. I'll ask Sazed tomorrow."
A sigh. "I can't win, can I?"
"No." She kissed his cheek.
The plan had been simple enough but then it had backfired so badly. Kelsier was at a loss as he stared at the Lord Ruler, listening to his cutting words.
Kelsier couldn't believe Mare—he love of his life, his wife —had betrayed him
Dockson paced the room, impatient. Kelsier had asked to meet him later that night and the man was running late. Dockson snorted to himself. As if he's ever on time .
Then he felt it.
A creeping sense of unease that grew into shock, that became pain. No. Not just pain—heartbreak.
Hammond burst into the room, his clothes in a wild disarray.
"They've been captured. Kelsier and Mare have been sent to the Pits."
Mare watched the man she loved through the dim light illuminating the cave. She knew he thought she'd sold him out but she hadn't. She would never have committed such a betrayal. Not against her crew, never against him.
Still, something had gone wrong and she had a sick feeling she had some part in it. Kelsier didn't deserve to die down here, not when he had so much potential for more. He had to survive.
So when she saw he had no atium bead, she offered hers, lying that she had found two.
"Thank you." His voice was soft, relief evident in his tone.
He smiled at her, that special smile he reserved just for her but Mare could tell it was a bit strained. She felt something inside her break. Flowers Forgotten , how she loved him.
"We have to survive, don't we?" she said, fighting the lump in her throat. The guards called them to form their lines. Kelsier walked away and she whispered, "I love you," to his retreating back.
When they came for her, she didn't fight. Her last thoughts were of Kelsier, her husband—and of Marsh, her soulmate.
I'm so sorry Marsh , she thought sadly as the darkness drew in.
For leaving you alone.
Pain lanced through him and his angry pacing came to a stop, the intensity nearly dropping him to his knees.
Marsh grabbed at his chest, clawing at it, trying to ease the building pressure. It hurt. It hurt worse than anything he'd ever felt.
He felt like someone had strapped him down, tied ropes on each limb and had Thugs pull on them, stretching him to his limits, not stopping no matter how much he cried out.
"W-What?" he gasped out. He heard hurried footsteps. Someone was calling out his name but he could barely hear it through his muffled ears. His entire body thrummed in excruciating pain and his throat hurt from how loud he was screaming.
His knees gave out under him and everything when black.
The ropes snapped.
We have to survive, don't we?
She'd lied.
We have to survive
Why hadn't he asked to see hers as well?
We have to survive
Mare..
We have to…
Survive!
Kelsier snapped.
Marsh woke up.
The terrisman sat next to him—a forlorn expression on his face.
Marsh felt it. The emptiness, the ache, the phantom feeling. He didn't need Sazed to explain what was happening to him. He knew.
His soulmate was gone.
Mare was dead.
And Marsh would never forgive his brother for it.
Dockson watched Marsh as he left the base. His form was haggard, his shoulders slouched, his iron eyes harder than before.
"He's not coming back, is he?" Hammond asked next to him. He looked sad, in pain and in a blink of an eye, the emotions evident on his face disappeared. Breeze was probably somewhere close trying to soothe his emotions away, so as to not disturb him.
Hammond frowned, realizing what was being done to him.
Dockson sighed and stared at the man who staggered away.
Mare was dead.
Marsh was leaving.
And something—something had happened to Kelsier.
Dockson didn't know what it was but he'd felt it. Almost at the same time Marsh had collapsed. He'd feared Kelsier was dying as well but what he'd felt was not the pain of a limb being ripped away. No. It had felt like waking up after days of being sick but having received medical help. Tired, sore but with a bit more energy, renewed.
He'd checked the bond the first thing when he'd woken up and Kelsier had been alive. Alive but different. He'd felt different. More determined—more unhinged.
He'd told the rest of the crew about his findings.
Marsh had decided to leave not long after.
Marsh, who now disappeared into the mists without a single look back.
"No Ham. I don't think he will."
Mistborn
Dockson, while ecstatic his friend had escaped, couldn't help but roll his eyes as he found out how exactly Kelsier had managed to get his freedom through the numerous letters.
Mistborn , he thought with surprisingly no surprise.
Kelsier was going to be even more insufferable.
The old heap of ash is bat-shit crazy , Kelsier thought to himself as he watched his mentor.
Sometimes Gemmel seemed more beast than man. He muttered to himself, speaking as if to a friend Kelsier couldn't see or hear.
Gemmel leaned closer, still muttering, his breath pungent and sharp, his eyes wide and frenzied. This man wasn't completely sane. No. That was a gross understatement. This man had only a fringe of sanity left to him, and even that fringe was beginning to fray.
But he was the only Mistborn who Kelsier knew, and damn it , Kelsier was going to learn from the man. It was either that or start taking lessons from some nobleman.
The eleventh metal, a voice whispered in his ear. A way to defeat the Lord Ruler.
Yes, Kelsier thought. Best to see if there's any credence to the rumours.
Kelsier's first stop was Luthadel. It had been easy sneaking into the city. His mist-cloak billowed behind him as he leapt over the wall and the guards knew it was not wise to interfere with the elite soldiers of the noble families.
Sadly for them, Kelsier wasn't a nobleman.
Dockson's face when he opened his door was worth the long trip through the Dominance. It had been nearly three years since he'd last seen his best friend- his soulmate, not regarding the occasional letters they'd send back and forth when Kelsier had a chance
Kelsier smiled brightly at the man before him and nearly fell over from the weight that was suddenly thrown at him as Dockson pulled him into an embrace. Luckily he had pewter on his side.
Kelsier laughed. He wrapped his arms around him and couldn't hide the brittle croak to his voice when he spoke.
"Looks like someone missed me."
Dockson pulled away and glared.
"Three years!"
Kelsier winced but quickly smiled. "Oh come on Dox, don't be like that."
Dockson's expression didn't change. Kelsier stared at his squarish face, close-cropped straight black hair and couldn't help but feel his heart start to quicken. He tried hiding his emotions so as to not let them slip through the bond but from the slight change on Dockson's face, he wasn't quite successful. Why can't one soothe themselves! Quickly, Kelsier soothed away the emotions his friend was receiving from him.
Kelsier wasn't ready to have that conversation.
Side-stepping the shorter man, Kelsier strode into the small hide-out.
"Still as boring as ever I see," Kelsier said. He heard Dockson close the door behind them.
Dockson mumbled something under his breath. Possibly a threat but Kelsier was in too good a mood to care.
"You can put that in my room while I get us drinks."
'That' being the mist-cloak still on his back.
Kelsier smiled and moved towards the direction pointed at. He unwrapped the cloak from his shoulders and rolled it into a bundle. He'd stuff it in one of the drawers. The first was full of the brown hooded cloaks Dockson seemed to like so much. The second, third and fourth had his nobleman's suits.
Kelsier opened the fifth and froze. It was empty except for the stack of letters tied together. Not just any letters, his letters. The ones he'd sent every time he stayed in one place long enough while training with Gommel to send and receive a letter. They were all written in code so it was impossible for anyone else outside of his crew to understand, hence why Kelsier had taken the risk.
Also….well, he'd wanted to talk to his friend. He'd missed him and seeing all his letters safely stored with some wear on them, indicating Dockson had read them more than once…
Kelsier slammed the drawer close.
"Right," he whispered, ignoring the warm feelings bubbling in his chest and placed the bundle on the bed.
He walked back into the common room and smoothly sat across from Dockson. It was quiet, the occasional crackle of the fire breaking the silence. Kelsier wrapped his hands around the warm cup, letting the warmth ooze into him. He stared at Dockson. He was scribbling in those ledgers of his. A crease formed on his forehead, a frown showing displeasure, as he rubbed away what he was working on. It felt like he was trying a bit too hard on concentrating on his papers. He must have noticed he was being stared at because his eyes rose and focused on Kelsier.
Kelsier smiled at him.
Dockson placed his work on the table and relaxed into his seat.
"What?"
Kelsier frowned. "Nothing. I just missed your grumpy face."
Dockson looked at him, unbelieving.
"What?" Kelsier asked, a bit offended. "What about me missing you is unbelievable?"
Dockson rolled his eyes, his gaze shifting to the fireplace. It's only because Kelsier was burning tin that he could see the faint blush staining his cheeks
—
Dockson fought fervently to stop his cheeks from staining red.
Lord Ruler, did Kelsier have any idea what he was doing to him? His heart thumped painfully against his chest. He must know—he was aware of Dockson's feelings for him. That meant he was either being genuine or he was teasing. He wasn't sure which would hurt more.
Kelsier loved Mare. Even though she had betrayed them. The man wasn't one to stop loving someone even if they hurt him. Dockson loved her as well. She had been a friend and despite it all, he still loved her. It felt like a betrayal to openly flirt with him.
"Stop." His voice was hard.
"Stop what?" Kelsier asked.
"Just stop it!" Dockson exploded. He took a deep breath to calm himself. He wasn't one to let his emotions carry his actions. That was more Kelsier.
"Just," his tone was exhausted. "Please stop."
Scrapping of wood against the floor and Kelsier was kneeling before him. His hand reached forward and grabbed Dockson's.
"Dox."
Dockson closed his eyes. He couldn't handle how Kelsier was looking at him.
"We can't," he whispered.
"Why not?"
Dockson opened his eyes. Kelsier was staring at him. His eyes earnest.
"Mare—"
Kelsier flinched. He focused on the floor beneath them.
"—you love her."
"I do." Kelsier didn't deny. Dockson had expected it but it still hurt. "But," Kelsier lifted his gaze and focused them on him, "I love you too."
—
Kelsier watched as his words registered on his best friend's face. The slow widening of his eyes. His lips parting in shock. The quickening of his pulse beneath his hand.
Dockson ripped his hand away and stood up, the chair tilting to the floor in his haste. "No. You don't."
Kelsier blinked .
"You don't love me Kell. You can't."
Kelsier stood up. "What do you mean I can't?"
Dockson was running his hand over his face. "You just can't."
Kelsier was sure the crack in his heart was audible. It was the certainty— tainted with a bit of disbelief, layered with hope— in his voice that made him understand. Dockson didn't think his love was genuine. He thought he was latching onto anything— him —as a rebound after losing Mare.
Kelsier didn't word his disagreement or his sincerity.
The bond flared to life between them. It was a slight twinge of the heart that caused a slight shiver in their frames. It was the feeling of rightness that made it seem that not everything was wrong in the world.
Kelsier let his emotions glide down the bond. The love he felt for him as his closest friend. The love that grew for Mare, a different love but just as intense as that he had for him. The joy of his days when he had both of them at his side. The heartbreak at her betrayal. The despair at her death. The disbelief when he gained his powers. The urge he felt to reconnect with his friends when he'd escaped. The grief he suffered for a year but eased every time he received a letter from Dockson. How his heart would skip each time he received word from him. First from excitement from hearing from his friend, then slowly as the months went by, his heart would skip for a different reason. The desperation of wanting to travel back and see him. The realisation that he'd fallen in love with best friend. Over words on a piece of paper, mind you.
The fact that even though he loved Mare, he'd come to love him as well.
Dockson was softly crying as the barge of emotions came to a halt, the bond quivering between them.
Kelsier was one to act then think of the consequences afterwards but this time, he was careful. He'd done his part, it was upto Dockson to either accept or reject him.
Dockson took a step towards him and pulled him close by the waist. Kelsier wrapped his arms around his neck. Their chests were pressed together and he felt how both their hearts were racing. They quickened when Dockson leaned forward and kissed him.
The bond answered him back.
I love you too
He'd found it. The eleventh metal. Now it was back to Luthadel. He had a new job for the crew. But first, a few stops along the way. One was never too busy to kill a couple of noblemen. He'd start with Lord Tresting.
Dockson strolled up next to Kelsier, then leaned against the battlement, resting a pair of stout arms on the stone. He leaned forward and pressed a kiss on his cheek.
"You're a few days late, Kell."
"I decided to make a few extra stops in the plantations to the north." Kelsier kissed him back, on the lips.
"Ah," Dockson said. "So you did have something to do with Lord Tresting's death."
Kelsier smiled. "You could say that."
Dockson rolled his eyes. He was used to Kelsier's foolhardy ways. Kelsier smiled and wrapped his arm around him. "It's good to be back. Even though it's a depressing, stark pit of a city. Guess it's because you're here." A pinch on his side.
"Ow. Anyway, you have the meeting organised?"
Dockson nodded. "It's in the evening though."
"Who's coming?"
"Breeze and Ham will be there of course. They're very curious about this mystery job of ours—not to mention rather annoyed that I won't tell him what you've been up to these last few years."
"Good," Kelsier said with a smile. "Let them wonder. How about Trap?"
"Dead. The Ministry beheaded him on the spot."
Kelsier exhaled slowly. "We need a Smoker." He paused and thought. "How about Clubs?"
"Isn't he supposed to be hard to work with?"
"He's not so bad. Besides, I have a feeling he'll be amenable to this particular job. Yeden will be joining us as well."
"He better be. He's the one paying us."
Kelsier tightened his grip on his partner before asking quietly, "You didn't mention Marsh."
Dockson sighed. "That's going to be a tough one Kell. He never did approve of your methods and after—" He trailed off not voicing the other reason Marsh may not want to work with him. "He won't even have anything to do with Yeden and the rebellion anymore, let alone with a bunch of criminals like us.I think we'll have to find someone else to infiltrate the obligators "
Kelsier felt a tightening in his chest. "No. He'll do it. I just need to talk to him first."
Dockson shrugged. "If you say so."
They sat in silence looking out over the ash-stained city.
Dockson finally shook his head. "This is insane, eh?"
Kelsier smiled. "Feels good, doesn't it?"
Dockson nodded. "Fantastic."
"It will be a job like no other," Kelsier said, looking north—across the city and toward the twisted building at its center.
"Still not telling me what the other part of the job is?"
"Nope. You'll have to wait like everyone else."
"I have other ways of getting the information out of you."
"Please try. I will thoroughly enjoy it."
Dockson laughed. "Later. We have a few hours before the meeting. There's something I want to show you. I think there's still time—if we hurry."
Kelsier made sure to smile at the girl, trying to get her stiff posture to ease before turning to Dockson. "That was far too much fun, Dox."
Dockson snorted and moved toward the front of the room. The girl tensed when it seemed he was moving towards her. "You were insufferable enough before, Kell, I don't know how I'm going to handle this new reputation of yours. At least, I'm not sure how I'm going to handle it and maintain a straight face."
"You're jealous."
"Yes, that's it," Dockson drawled. "I'm terribly jealous of your ability to intimidate petty criminals. If it's of any note to you, I think you were too harsh on Camon."
Kelsier walked over and took a seat at one of the room's tables. His mirth darkened slightly as he spoke. "You saw what he was doing to the girl."
"Actually, I didn't," Dockson said dryly, rummaging through the bar's stores. "Someone was blocking the doorway."
Kelsier shrugged. "Look at her, Dox. The poor thing's been beaten nearly senseless. I don't feel any sympathy for the man." He watched the girl. She was swaying lightly on her feet, though trying very hard to hide it by clenching her teeth.
She refused any help from Dockson so Kelsier kept up his banter with Dockson to try to ease the tension.
"You're... friends?" she asked. Kelsier wasn't sure he liked how she said the word friends. As though it was a distant concept she wasn't quite sure about. Dockson shared a concerned look with him.
"Of course we are."
The girl—Vin—shrugged and Kelsier could tell the movement was painful for her. Hopefully a distraction enough, he showed her that Dockoson and him were soulmates. She didn't look impressed.
He showed her that she was Mistborn, then she looked impressed.
"Kell," Dockson said, "do you have to stand on the ledge like that? Our plans may be a bit crazy, but I'd rather not have them end with you splattered across the cobblestones down there."
Kelsier was tempted to kiss him senseless for being overly worried but he'd save that for later. He had a mistborn to train.
Kelsier gripped his pouch in one hand and the bag of atium in the other. He kept his pewter burning—without the strength it lent his body, he'd probably collapse from the pain of his wounds—and dashed off into the night, heading toward Clubs's shop.
Dockson was going to kill him.
Kelsier swung open the door to the room he was sharing with Dockson as quietly as he could. He didn't believe in any higher power—especially not the Lord Ruler— but he was tempted to start praying if it meant Dockson would be asleep.
Stepping lightly, he headed towards the bathroom to clean his wounds and—
"What do you think you're doing?"
—no such luck.
Biting back a sigh, Kelsier turned on his heel, the two bags tied to his waist making noise, and smiled at his frowning partner.
Dockson sat with his arms crossed, eyebrow arched and an annoyed snarl on his face.
"Love—"
"Don't you 'Love' me." His gaze dropped to Kelsier's soiled clothes and he pinched the bridge of his nose. Dockson stood and moved to stand before his partner. "Let me see."
Kelsier had fervently fought from fidgeting while Dockson appraised him but he now shifted his feet nervously. "Most of this isn't mine. Really, you should see those I left behind."
No smile. Nothing. Dockson remained the impenetrable force he was. Kelsier let his smile drop. Honestly, Dockson never appreciated his sense of humour. He sighed and untied the atium beads from his belt. Dropping them onto the bed, he lifted his shirt off—only slightly wincing when his dried shirt stuck to his wounded skin and he had to rip it off.
"There—" Kelsier exclaimed, lifting his arms out from his side. "—see? Perfectly fine. I can barely feel a thing."
Dockson purposefully pressed down against a tender spot. Kelsier visibly winced.
"Right," Dockson deadpanned. "Get on the bed."
Not wanting to be scolded further, Kelsier did as told and plumped down onto the bed, still shirtless. Not long after, Dockson came back with medical supplies and a bucket of warm water. He was gentle as he washed away the specs of blood that mattered Kelsier's chest. The warm water was soothing and he found himself relaxing at the gentle ministrations.
Kelsier stared at him as he worked. The concentrated look as he diligently fixed up, as meticulous as he handled the books. A deep fondness moved through the bond and Dockson looked up from the wrapping he was tying off, only for Kelsier to lean in and press a kiss against his lips.
It was gentle at first, before Kelsier pressed harder against him, tongue peeking out to run against the seam of his lips. Dockson leaned forward, resting one hand on the bed and the other on Kelsier's side. He was kneeling on the floor so Kelsier had to crane his neck at an uncomfortable angle. His hands came up and settled on Dockson's shoulders as he pressed further into the kiss, shifting closer to the edge.
Kelsier was just about to pull Dockson's shirt off when his partner moved away.
"W-What? Dox?"
"No," he said and moved back to finishing the bandage wrap on Kelser's chest.
"But—"
"No buts. You're injured and knowing you, you'll want to go the whole night." He finished off the bandage and moved to sit on the bed.
Kelsier smirked. "Well—"
"Don't get cocky Kell. It's because you can burn pewter, not because of any energy prowess you think you have," Dockson teased.
Kelsier gaped at him, offended before mumbling, "It's not my fault you can't fuck me for hours."
Dockson rolled his eyes. "Either way, no sex. Bed, now."
The next morning, they both left their room together but Kelsier rushed off to gather some more materials for the meeting—not before giving Dockson a soft kiss goodbye. Dockson smiled when he felt them being watched.
"You'll want to get ready, Vin," he said as he passed her door. "There's a fresh bath for you in the room at the end of the hallway, and I had Clubs scrounge you up a few changes of clothing. They should fit well enough until we can get you something more appropriate. Take your time in the bath—Kell's planned a meeting for this afternoon, but we can't start until Breeze and Ham arrive."
He couldn't help but smile as he passed.
Marsh dropped a sheet of paper onto the chair beside Kelsier.
"The names of the eleven men you slaughtered last night. I thought you might at least want to know." Not likely.
As predicted, Kelsier tossed the paper into the fire. "They served the Final Empire."
This—this was what he hated about his brother. The complete disregard he had for people who didn't align with his views. They weren't people, they were merely things in his way to be tossed aside.
"They were men, Kelsier," Marsh couldn't help but snap. He hadn't seen his brother in years but instead of the heartfelt reunion, they were already at each other's necks. Well he was—Kelsier just smiled. "They had lives, families. Several of them were skaa."
And that's what Marsh didn't understand. He hated the nobility—not with almost religious ferocity Kelsier did—so he understood Kelsier's complete disregard of their lives but skaa . The same people he claimed to help? The ones who were just trying to survive?
"If they want to stand against me like noblemen, then they can die like noblemen."
Marsh wanted to hit him. Wanted to hurt him. Years of resentment, moreso in the last three years, rose to the surface and he wanted to lash out. To knock that stupid smile off his brother's face.
Instead, he called him out on his reasons for helping the rebellion and in typical Kelsier fashion, he denied it.
"Marsh—"
It was from the tone of the voice that Marsh knew he was about to bring her up.
"Don't," he whispered. The phantom pains he usually fervently ignored pulsed and Marsh just wanted Kelsier to stop .
For once in his life, Kelsier listened.
"How are you feeling? Are you—"
Marsh chucked bitterly. "Don't worry Kelsier. I won't commit suicide before listening to whatever insane plan you've concocted. I'll be back later."
Marsh turned to walk away.
"I miss her too," Kelsier said quietly.
He paused on his exit to reply but when he saw Dockson enter the room, his gaze immediately falling to Kelsier—the love evident on his face—he shut his mouth and left without another word.
Of course Kelsier, of all people, would get them both.
The plan was going smoothly. They'd found a way to infiltrate the Ministry and Vin had left for her first ball—they'd finally got her to wear gloves without taking them off, no need risking the possibility of her soulmate being a noble— but then she'd gone and caught the eye of Elend Venture of all people. The heir to the family that owned the Pits of Hathsin—where Mare had died. No, he was probably using her like all nobility do. Best to warn her off.
It was a bit humorous how Kelsier seemed to find himself in such situations but this time, all he felt was dread. The visit to Kredik Shaw had gone massively wrong. He'd lost track of Vin in all the chaos—barely making it out alive himself, and he had years of training.
You should have sent her back in the first place. Kelsier though, disgusted with himself.
"YOU TOOK HER WITH YOU?" Dockson screamed as he burst into her room. "You took Vin into Kredik Shaw? Are you bloody insane!"
Knowing what was about to follow, Ham and Clubs were quick to vacate the kitchen—Clubs dragging his apprentice with him.
"Yes!" Kelsier snapped. "You've been right all along. I'm a madman. A lunatic. I should have died in the Pits and never come back to bother any of you!" His voice cracked towards the end, the self-loathing evident. He slammed his hand on the table in frustration, the wood splintering from the strength of a pewter-burning body. Tiny pieces of wood were stuck in his palm, more blood trickling down. The right side of his body burned and broken ribs were a possibility.
Dockson paused, taken back by his outburst. He moved forward and finished tying the bandage.
"It's okay Kell. Just breathe for me, okay?" His hand came up and cupped the side of his face, his thumb moving lightly over his cheekbone.
"There were three Inquisitors waiting for us, Dox," he started. "I distracted them while she got out but one followed her. I cou-couldn't get to it—"
"Sh," Dockson rubbed at his back. A thrum of the bond and comfort travelled down the thread. "Just breathe. What about Vin?"
Kelsier shook his head. "I don't know Dox. Maybe she got away and is hiding somewhere in the city."
The pessimism in Dockson's eyes showed the likelihood of that and Kelsier wasn't in the right frame of mind to be forcefully optimistic.
"We need to get back out there. I can take Ham—"
A loud commotion from the other room, shouting. Kelsier stood up, way too fast with all the blood loss, but burning Pewter helped. Dockson grabbed his arm, slinging it around his shoulders and supporting his weight as they moved towards the noise.
In the next room, they found Club's apprentices moving about to orders. Hammond was running back into the room with a vial of metals which he handed to—
—Sazed, who knelt over an unconscious Vin.
Dockson felt Kelsier sag against him in relief.
Marsh stared at the girl he'd noticed months back. She looked healthier than the last time he'd seen her. She wasn't as malnourished—her skin had a healthy flush and her dark hair had a sheen.
Hell, she looks better than most skaa, he thought to himself as he made his way across the balcony. "Kelsier apparently expects me to spend the evening training you in Allomancy. Let's get started."
The girl was talented, that's for sure. She was quick to pick up what he explained.
"You know a lot about all the metals, but you're just a Misting, right?"
Marsh nodded. His interest with the allomantic metals was due to him wanting to learn all he could to fight the rebellion. His gaze shifted to the gardens below and the barren hills beyond. If Sazed was to be believed then before the Lord Ruler, all would have been filled with colour. Flowers to be exact, plants of different colours that highlighted the ground. He felt himself relax into the seat—simply enjoying the view.
"You must have learned somewhere?" Vin asked.
"I Snapped when I was very young," Marsh replied. "I've had a long time to practise."
"So have a lot of people."
Marsh sighed. "You know how Kelsier feels about nobility?" When nodded, he continued—completely at ease. Why had he been angry when coming here in the first place? "I feel the same about obligators. They took our mother—that's when I Snapped, and that's when I vowed to destroy them. Inquisitors use it, so I had to understand it—understand everything I could," The girl was so easy to talk to. Marsh couldn't help but open up to her. To te— "and are you Soothing me?"
Marsh let the anger in his voice shine through, turning to stare at her coldy.
The girl started, "Yes," she answered meekly.
"You are good," Marsh said, impressed. He'd barely noticed until he realised how much he was rambing—sharing with a stranger. "Don't do it again."
"I won't, and I'm sorry."
Marsh shook his head. "You're Mistborn—that's what you do. He does the same thing." He pointedly looked down at his brother. It was how I so easily agreed to this suicidal plan, he thought gravelly.
"You're so stern. Like my brother," she took a deep breath, "I hated him."
"I see."
"Do you hate Kelsier?"
Sometimes.
But is it really hate or just years of resentment?
Marsh shook his head, sure of his answer, "No, I don't hate him. He's frivolous and self-important, but he's my brother."
"And that's enough?" Vin whispered.
Marsh nodded.
It was enough.
Dockson shrugged. "It's been a while since I lived there, Vin. I don't know that the plantation was overly traumatic. It was just life—we didn't know anything better. In fact, I now know that amongst plantation lords, mine was actually rather lenient."
"Why did you leave then?"
Dockson paused, painful memories rushing to the surface. Kareien with her bright yellow curled locs. She had been beautiful and the lord had noticed.
"Lord Devinshae took someone I loved."
"Who was she?"
Dockson felt a small smile grow when he remembered their time together. "Another girl at the plantation. I remember sneaking out to see her." His smile disappeared. "When he returned her corpse the next day, I—I just couldn't stay. It was hard, losing someone I loved. It was a difficult thing to experience."
Vin looked at him, confused. "But she wasn't your soulmate."
Dockson shook his head. "Vin, you can fall in love with someone who isn't your soulmate. Their death would still affect you—maybe not as bad as your soulmate's but still as devastating. I still remember Kareien, even now."
Vin shook her head. "I know that you don't have to love your soulmate romantically—that you can love someone else—but how can you find someone essentially 'perfect for you' and not love them?"
Dockson leaned forward. "Vin, just because someone's your soulmate doesn't mean they'll automatically treat you the way you deserve. I met this mad-man who claimed something called the Cosmere, paired up souls at the beginning, not taking into consideration how the person would change as they grow up."
She scowled. "Then what's the point?"
Dockson shrugged. "I can't say. Maybe ask Hammond that next time you see him." He gave her a smile and she smiled back.
You fool, Kelsier thought to himself as he made his way inside. He'd made sure that Vin had gotten safely to bed before dragging his exhausted body to the common room to explain the recent events. It was late in the night, almost early morning and everyone had gone asleep, only Sazed had remained awake to make sure Vin would be okay.
There was light in the room. Dockson was awake.
Kelsier pushed open the door.
"You know Dox, this is getting a bit repetitive, don't you think?" His words were a bit slurred, too many spaces between syllables. He was no stranger to pewter dragging but he sometimes felt the effects. Like now, he felt like his limbs were on fire.
Dockson rose to his feet and quietly offered his shoulder for support.
They settled on the bed, Dockon leaning against the headboard and Kelsier sitting between his thighs. He leaned back and settled against his partner's chest. Dockson wrapped his arms around him, settling one hand on his chest and another on his hip.
"So many of them died, Dox."
Dockson's hand soothingly ran up and down his chest. He reached up and grabbed the hand, halting its movement.
"Why are you always the one comforting me ?" Kelsier forcefully joked, the smile on his face slowly cracking under the grief.
Dockson kissed his temple. "You're always landing yourself into trouble. Someone has to be the responsible one."
Kelsier snorted, the sound weak.
"Kell," Dockson started. He entwined their fingers. "You don't have to smile with me."
Oh, but he did. How else could he move on despite the staggering loss they'd just incurred? All those skaa dead and he'd only just realised he was fighting a thousand years of conditioning. The skaa people were too put down to fight back and he had to change that. He had an idea—an idea recently planted and was currently being watered. If he allowed himself to think it through, the possible outcome could lead to a major advantage but a significant loss to those close to him.
Especially to the man who currently held him.
So he let himself cry.
He let Dockson turn him around and settle him on his lap. He let himself settle his face in the space between his neck— Dockson's shirt soak up his tears. He let himself cry. Not because of the loss but because of what he might need to do.
"We'll find a way Kell," Dockson whispered, rocking him back and forth. "Like you said, we just need to survive."
Marsh was good at allomancy, so good that he'd been able to infiltrate the obligators. But he'd been too good and now he was being noticed. Nothing good ever came from being noticed by obligators.
"What about the Inquisitors? Did you find anything out about them?"
Marsh thought back to the strange room he'd stumbled into accidentally. "They're strange. They're not immortal but something is done to them. Something they don't tell the public. I'm still trying to gather more information."
Kelsier nodded. "If they can die of old age, then there's probably other ways to kill them too."
Marsh nodded and realised he'd been gone too late. "I should go. I'm going to be late getting to my appointment."
Kelsier nodded and Marsh began to move away, picking his way over the rubble in his dark obligator's robe.
"Marsh," Kelsier said and Marsh turned to see Kelsier had followed him leaving Vin behind. Then something strange happened—Kelsier hugged him.
It was a strange experience. They were nearly the same height and so his arms came around his shoulders. Marsh's hands remained on his sides, in shock, for a few seconds before hesitantly returning the gesture, his hands settling on his brother's back. It had been years since they'd last hugged—probably when they were children—a simple slap on the back being enough physical affection between the two.
"Thank you," Kelsier whispered. "I can only guess how dangerous this is."
They disentangled, a shocked expression still on Marsh's face. "I'm not doing it for you, Kell." A flash of hurt was quickly hidden and Marsh was quick to continue, "But...I appreciate the sentiment. I'll try and send you another missive once I have more information."
Kelsier nodded and stepped back. "Be careful."
Marsh hesitated before nodding and disappearing into the mists.
"That's why I ask," Kelsier said. "I...need to understand what kept them going for so long, Saze. What made them keep fighting?"
"They were most determined I think," Sazed replied.
"But they didn't have any leaders," Kelsier argued. "The Lord Ruler had slaughtered the entire Vallan religious council as part of his first conquest."
"Oh, they had leaders, Master Kelsier," Sazed said. "Dead ones, true, but leaders nonetheless."
"Some men would say that their devotion didn't make sense," Kelsier said, a bit of desperation leaking through. "The loss of the Vallan leaders should have broken the people, not made them more determined to keep going."
Sazed shook his head. "Men are more resilient than that, I think. Our belief is often strongest when it should be weakest. That is the nature of hope."
Kelsier nodded. Hope.
"Did you want further instruction on the Valla?"
"No. Thanks, Saze. I just needed to be reminded that there were people who fought even when things looked hopeless."
Sazed nodded, rising. "I think I understand, Master Kelsier. Good evening, then."
Kelsier nodded distractedly, letting the Terrisman withdraw.
Decisions. Decisions. The watering continued and a seedling had sprouted.
Everything hurt.
The body beside him had stopped moving—the thrashing coming to an end once the spikes had become too many.
They'd driven it in him, one by one. They'd forced him to drink a vial of metals.
Then the pain ceased—
—and Marsh was reborn.
"I should be leaving, Master Kelsier," Sazed said, checking the wall clock. "Mistress Vin should be about ready to leave."
Kelsier nodded, briefly tightening his hold around Dockson's waist. "I should get going myself. I still have to—"
The outside kitchen door slammed open. Vin stood silhouetted by the dark mist, wearing nothing but her dressing undergarments—a flimsy white shirt and shorts. Both were sprayed with blood.
"Vin!" Ham exclaimed, standing.
Her cheek bore a long, thin gash, and she had a bandage tied on one forearm. "I'm fine," she said wearily.
"What happened to your dress?" Dockson immediately demanded. Kelsier sighed. Of course that was the first thing he'd ask.
"You mean this?" Vin asked apologetically, holding up a ripped, soot-stained blue mass of cloth. "It... got in the way. Sorry, Dox."
"Lord Ruler, girl!" Breeze said. "Forget the dress—what happened to you!"
Vin shook her head, shutting the door. Spook blushed furiously at her outfit, and Sazed immediately moved over, checking the wound on her cheek.
"I think I did something bad," Vin said. "I . . . kind of killed Shan Elariel."
"You did what?" Kelsier demanded, also rising to his feet, as Sazed tisked quietly, leaving the small cheek cut alone as he undid the bandage on her arm.
Vin flinched slightly at Sazed's ministrations. "She was Mistborn. We fought. I won."
You killed a fully-trained Mistborn? Kelsier thought with shock. You've practiced for barely eight months!
"Master Hammond," Sazed requested, "would you fetch my healer's bag?"
Ham nodded, rising.
"You might want to grab her something to wear too," Kelsier suggested, a bit amused. "I think poor Spook's about to have a heart attack."
"What's wrong with this?" Vin asked, nodding toward her clothing. "It's not that much more revealing than some of the thief's clothing I've worn."
"Those are undergarments, Vin," Dockson deadpanned.
"So?"
"It's the principle of the matter," Dockson said. "Young ladies do not run around in their undergarments, no matter how much those undergarments may resemble regular clothing."
They were able to get more information about the fight, Kelsier feeling impressed at her skill yet guilty at having brought her into the whole mess, as Sazed finished treating her wounds.
"Why?" Kelsier asked.
Vin sat for a moment, Sazed working on her cheek. "She was going to kill Elend," she finally said.
Kelsier exhaled in exasperation, annoyed at having to revisit this specific conversation. "Elend Venture? You risked your life—risked the plan, and our lives—for that fool of a boy?"
Vin looked up, glaring at him. "Yes."
"What is wrong with you, girl?" Kelsier asked. "Elend Venture isn't worth this."
She stood angrily, Sazed backing away, the cloak falling to the floor. "He's a good man!"
"He's a nobleman!" Kelsier shot back. Why can't you see that!
"So are you!" Vin snapped. She waved a frustrated arm toward the kitchen and the crew. "What do you think this is, Kelsier? The life of a skaa? What do any of you know about skaa? Aristocratic suits, stalking your enemies in the night, full meals and nightcaps around the table with your friends? That's not the life of a skaa!"
She took a step forward, glaring at Kelsier. He blinked. They were all frozen in surprise at the outburst, the absolute passions in her words...and the truth.
"What do you know about them, Kelsier?" she asked. "When's the last time you slept in an alley, shivering in the cold rain, listening to the beggar next to you cough with a sickness you knew would kill him? When's the last time you had to lay awake at night, terrified that one of the men in your crew would try to rape you? Have you ever knelt, starving, wishing you had the courage to knife the crewmember beside you just so you could take his crust of bread? Have you ever cowered before your brother as he beat you, all the time feeling thankful because at least you had someone who paid attention to you?"
She fell silent, puffing slightly, the crew-members staring at her.
"Don't talk to me about noblemen," Vin said. "And don't say things about people you don't know. You're no skaa—you're just noblemen without titles."
Then she left. She turned, stalking from the room. Kelsier watched her go, shocked, hearing her footsteps on the stairs. He stood, dumbfounded, feeling a surprising flush of ashamed guilt.
And, for once, found himself without anything to say.
They were silent as they heard her heavy footsteps fall away.
"I—" Dockson started then stopped, also speechless.
"She's right you know," Breeze noted, having fallen back to his calm, unbothered demeanor. "About all of it."
Kelsier sighed. "I'll go talk to her."
There was a chance that Mare hadn't betrayed them—a slim possibility—but it gave Kelsier a new sense of hope, despite Vin's confession that she'd found out Elend was her soulmate during the fight with Shan.
They could do this. They could destroy the Final Empire, the Lord Ruler and everyone who defended it.
Then they found Marsh's body and everything changed. Kelsier vowed to burn everything the Lord Ruler held dear—to the ground.
"Dox?" Kelsier called out into the night. He was tired, pewter drag still affecting him, but he needed to do this.
Dockson shifted on the bed and turned to face him. Kelsier was staring at the ceiling, resolution on his face. He lay in silence as Kelsier shared his thoughts out loud, growing more horrified with each sentence, each word.
"No," Dox whispered as he translated the emotions he was currently feeling. "Don't— please ." He choked the words out, forcing them through the traitorous lump in his throat. His eyes stung and he reached out, grabbing Kelsier's hand with enough force to crack a finger.
"I have to," Kelsier whispered. He was calm—no grandeur in his speech, just plain conviction and belief in what he needed to do.
Kelsier swam before him and Dockson realised he had started crying, the tears making their salty path. He inched closer and shoved his face into his neck, hand grasping at the cloth covering his chest.
"If you do this—" he choked out. "I'll hate you forever." I could never hate you. "I will never forgive you."
"I know," Kelsier whispered, still resolute.
"Vin will never forgive you! At least think of something else!" he cried.
Kelsier closed his, already feeling the guilt eat him away but answered, still as firm, "I know." He turned and pulled him closer. "You're strong, the both of you. You'll survive."
Dockson's eyes were still red when he woke up the next day. There was a certain tenseness between him and Kelsier that the other crew noticed. Vin questioned him and Dockson felt his eyes mist over as he lied to her about Kelsier's choice of actions.
But then Kelsier had fought an inquisitor... and won.
He grew hopeful that he'd change his mind. Think of something— anything —else than his stupid plan.
Then the Lord Ruler arrived.
"You tried," Kelsier replied, his voice loud and firm, carrying across the square. "But you can't kill me, Lord Tyrant. I represent that thing you've never been able to kill, no matter how hard you try." Kelsier opened his bond to Dockson, his soulmate, and relied on all the love he felt for the man, all the love he had for Mare, for Vin, for the crew and for all the skaa who suffered and died under him.
"I am hope."
It was an all-consuming pain that traveled through his body in multiple shocks. It brought him to his knees and Hammond caught him as he fell—his body shutting down in shock, in pain, in the empty feeling that it struggled to hold on to.
There's not enough time . If Kelsier's plan was to be believed, then the people would be rebelling soon. He tried to push the pain away, it was something he'd had practice under the plantation guards' kicks and punches. Hammond was staring at him in pity but Dockson grit his teeth and shook his head. It didn't help with the stars in his vision but it did keep him awake.
"Come on," he said to the rest of the crew. "We need to leave." He directed Hammond to grab Vin who was kneeling over Kelsier's body, crying. He didn't look towards Kelsier's body—he wouldn't. If he wanted to see this through, then he had to get them moving.
As they made their quick exit, Hammond pulled a tearful comatose Vin and Breeze supported his weight. Darkness crept to the edge of his vision and he struggled to stay awake. He croaked out, "The warehouse," before falling unconscious.
A red string hung in the darkness, limp, falling into oblivion, weeping, crying, moaning for what it had lost.
When he came to, he was sluggish. The entire world seemed to have shifted. Nothing looked right, nothing felt right. The blanket was too rough, the light was too bright and those voices—angry—were too loud.
"You need to relax Master Dockson," a kindly voice said. "You'll be feeling the withdrawals."
Right. That explained how he felt. Was he to feel like this for the rest of his life? Was this how Marsh felt all of these years? Why hadn't he ended it? Dockson wanted it to end. He wanted all of it to stop. The pain—oh the pain. Was this to be his life?
I hate you, he thought brokenly. The image of Kelsier's death replaying in his mind. You selfish bastard!
"We found the letter," Sazed said. "We are not sure what to do."
That caught his attention and Dockson started. Right, the job. He realised that when he focused, the pain was numbed.
"Help me up," he croaked.
"Master Do—"
"Now, Sazed! We need to prepare. The skaa should be rebelling soon."
The Terrisman frowned. "Why would they be rebelling?"
Dockson climbed to his feet, unsteady. "You told him the power religions had. The belief and the hope." A look of realisation. "The kandra?"
Sazed shook his head, "Left."
Dockson nodded. Screaming in the distance.
It had started.
—
Dockson kept himself busy, scribbling notes, giving orders. The Noble houses were falling: Elariel being the most recent. Vin had been captured and Dockson thought his heart would give out from the stress. There was too much to do but Vin was too important to let die—as a member of the crew and as Kelsier's daughter.
Wouldn't that make her my daughter as well?
It went from bad to worse when Elend Venture appeared, speaking sense, and Dockson was tempted to cut him down where he stood—one less noble to deal with—when he accepted the logic of his words, Vin's accusations ringing in his ears. Besides, he was her soulmate and Dockson never wanted Vin to feel that gripling loss.
The boy asked after her and Dockson watched as a noble, a normal man with no special powers or training, gathered men to go rescue the woman he loved. It was after he left that Dockson recalled that the boy had no idea Vin was his soulmate.
That speech. That speech.
Dockson couldn't help but stare open-mouthed as Elend Venture preached to the crowd, convinced them—and the crowd listened , skaa and noble alike.
He gritted his teeth, a painful pulse shooting through his limbs.
And just like that—they had a noble on the throne.
When the morning came, Dockson knew it would play out like every other day before. He'd lay there—still in the steady morning silence—blinking at the high ceiling of Keep Venture as he willed the exhaustive pain away. Forcefully numbing the insistent throbbing in his chest. He'd turn to the left side of the bed and stretch out his arm—reaching out for their usual morning cuddles, only to find it bare and cold. So very cold. The cold would worm its way into his warm space, eating away whatever comfort he'd managed in the blissful forgetful sleep he'd cried himself into the night prior.
(Kelsier nudged closer, accidentally knocking his forehead against his chin, rattling his teeth. He laughed, "Sorry Dox," and settled closer, his arms winding around his chest. Dockson grumbled but pulled him closer. It was cold but the shared warmth between them chased the chills away .)
Dockson blinked and got up from his bed. He must have left the window open, why else would it be so cold. Cold air, cold floor. His fingers were freezing. Where were his gloves? Kelsier had taken them the night of their confession, maybe he'd know where the—right. Dockson cupped his hands and blew hot air into them.
("Give it here," Kelsier demanded as they lounged together in bed.
"What?" Dockson asked, confused
"Your icy hands. You're not touching me with those fingers."
Kelsier grabbed his hands in his warm ones. He was always warm.
"I can just put on my gloves."
A scolding look.
"Absolutely not. In fact, I'll be taking those. No need for them anymore."
Dockson laughed, a happy carefree sound.
"Okay then Kell. You can keep me warm." )
He was dressed and out in a few minutes. There was a gradual building of sound as the Keep came to waking. The soft pattering of servants starting their chores, the heavy thumping of marching soldiers, the easy laughs and the banging of utensils as he neared one of the common rooms.
Soldiers saluted him when he passed by, servants bowed.
(Kelsier smiled when the soldier saluted at him, offering him an easy salute back. When the servant bowed before him, Kelsier laughed and waved them off. "No need for that my friend. Now where can I find food, I'm starving.")
Dockson didn't stop to acknowledge them. He kept moving. That's all he could do these days—keep moving.
He found Hammond already seated, stuffing his face.
"Good morning," he greeted. Dockson nodded in greeting.
He sat down and immediately, a plate was placed before him. He blinked and there was food on his plate. He glared up, wanting to say he could serve himself but no one stood near him. He glanced down and his hand was on the serving spoon. He placed it back in the bowl.
"Dockson, are you okay?"
Of course he is. Why wouldn't he be?
He nodded. "I'm fine Ham."
Hammond didn't look convinced but Dockson had no reassurances to offer. He stared at the spoon in his hand.
"Dockson?"
Breeze was seated across him, food served and a glass of wine being filled by one of the servants.
(Kelsier rolled his eyes, playfully nudging. "Ever the alcoholic.")
He blinked. A short nod. "Morning."
Hammond and Breeze shared a look that he ignored. He thought about the duties he needed to complete. Venture had finished up on another set of drafts of laws he wished to establish and Dockson needed to go through them. He'd hoped that he would find anything, something, that needed to be redone but the boy was meticulous in his work and infuriatingly fair and reasonable. Maybe Sazed would find something.
("Kill them all," Kelsier replied to his question. "Kill all the nobles and have the skaa rule themselves." )
He focused on the food.
A hand touched his shoulder. Glancing up, Vin stared at him in concern. A glance around the room and he realised Clubs and Spook had arrived. He shook his head.
"Good morning child."
"Good morning," she replied hesitantly. "Are you okay?"
Why was everyone asking him that?
"I'm fine Vin," he placed his hand over hers and comfortingly gave it a squeeze. "Where is Sazed? I have some things I need to run by him."
The room stilled. Vin's face contorted in confused anger. "He left. Three months ago."
Dockson blinked. Three months? But it was just yesterday that Kelsier ha—his breath caught in his chest and he felt his heart stop for a few heartbeats.
He staggered to his feet. Vin's hand remained stubbornly on him.
"Dock—"
"I need to leave," he interrupted. "I'll see you all during the meeting."
He turned leaving them calling out to him. On his way out, he bumped into a figure, nearly sending them sprawling to the floor.
"Wh—oh Dockson. Good morning."
Elend Venture leaned against the wall, balancing three books and a pot of ink. He stared at him, a bit hesitant and Dockson couldn't help but picture Kelsier leaning against the wall. Cocky smile on his face as he called him a clumsy idiot before kissing him in greeting.
The morning cold was yet to leave his bones, the pulsating beats of pain were beginning to spread through him and there was bitterness in his heart when he said, "It shouldn't be you," before stepping away.
The cold never left, it was like a bloody stain on a carpet. He scrubbed and scrubbed each day but there was forever a lingering red, the tiny whiff of blood in the air. He managed through it. After the incident during breakfast, he'd decided he couldn't go living in a haze. He would live, he would make sure that all their sacrifices hadn't been a waste. When he arrived at the meeting with gloves covering his hands and piles of papers full of statistics, no one said a word. How would they know the pain of losing a soulmate? Marsh would but he wasn't around. He'd disappeared after his conversation with Venture on him ruling the church. But the cold remained.
It lingered when he joined Hammond and his family for dinner, Hammond finally introducing his soulmate to his wife. Breeze had been awkward when shaking her hand, severely out of his element but Mardra had laughed and embraced him, introducing him to their eldest son named after him. Little Edgard, though having clearly taken his father's size, sized Breeze up before shrugging and introducing his younger sister, a toddler. Watching Breeze being forced to hold a baby had been hilarious but a small part had held him back from fully enjoying the moment. Soon after Breeze had left, quickly followed by Spook. Clubs had been worried when his nephew had accepted the assignment but he'd let him go.
The cold grew and lessened on occasions. It straggled whenever a memory, now painful, would surface and when watching Venture blunder his way through as King when it wasn't him who was supposed to be there. Kelsier wouldn't have waited for the council to make a decision, Staff Venture and all of his soldiers would have been dead before they'd reached Luthadel's walls. Vin wanted them to get close, insisted he was a good man but all Dockson could see was the Venture Heir, in charge of the Pits of Hathsin. A noble who'd profited from the suffering of the skaa. And if he couldn't blame Venture for what the other nobles did, he would have to consider what he and Kelsier did wrong. He couldn't—wouldn't.
"This is all Kelsier's fault," Dockson muttered, making another notation on his map. According to messengers, Ham had reached Keep Lekal. It wouldn't last long.
The Venture grand hall was a flurry of motion and chaos as panicked scribes ran this way and that, finally realizing that koloss didn't care if a man were skaa, scholar, nobleman, or merchant. The creatures just liked to kill.
"He should have seen this coming," Dockson continued. "He left us with this mess, and then he just assumed that we'd find a way to fix it. Well, I can't hide a city from its enemies—not like I hid a crew. Just because we were excellent thieves doesn't mean we'd be any good at running a kingdom!"
Thinking about Kelsier always brought pain along with it but this time the anger beat the pain.
Nobody was listening to him. His messengers had all fled, and his guards fought at the keep gates. Each of the keeps had its own defenses, but Clubs—rightly—had decided to use them only as a fallback option. They weren't designed to repel a large-scale attack, and they were too secluded from each other.
Retreating to them only fractured and isolated the human army.
"Our real problem is follow-through," Dockson said, making a final notation at Tin Gate, explaining what had happened there. He looked over the map. He'd never expected Sazed's gate to be the last one to hold.
"Follow-through," he continued. "We assumed we could do a better job than the noblemen, but once we had the power, we put them back in charge. If we'd killed the whole lot, perhaps then we could have started fresh. Of course, that would have meant invading the other dominances—which would have meant sending Vin to take care of the most important, most problematic, noblemen. There would have been a slaughter like the Final Empire had never seen. And, if we'd done that…"
He trailed off, looking up as one of the massive, majestic stained-glass windows shattered. The others began to explode as well, broken by thrown rocks. A few large koloss jumped through the holes, landing on the shard-strewn marble floor. Even broken, the windows were beautiful, the spiked glass edges twinkling in the evening light. Through one of them, Dockson could see that the storm was breaking, letting sunlight through.
"If we'd done that," Dockson said quietly, "we'd have been no better than beasts."
He understood now. It had taken an army invading Luthadel and everything he held dear but he understood. Scribes screamed, trying to flee as the koloss began the slaughter. Dockson stood quietly, hearing noise behind—grunts, harsh breathing—as koloss approached through the back hallways. He reached for the sword on his table as men began to die.
Dockson closed his eyes. He was going to die, he knew it but at least Vin was safe, Spook was safe, even Elend, though he'd hated him, was safe. That boy was going to change things, the three of them were—but he wasn't going to be there to see it.
He opened his eyes and turned, pulling the sword from its sheath. Then he froze, staring at the massive beast approaching from behind. Dockson gritted his teeth. I'm coming, you bastard , he thought then charged, swinging. The creature caught his weapon in an indifferent hand, ignoring the cut it caused. Then, it brought its own weapon down, and blackness followed.
It was cold but Dockson wasn't scared of it anymore.
Marsh struggled to kill himself. He was tired. Tired of constantly fighting for control. Nothing mattered anymore. The world was doomed anyway.
His hand trembled as he tried to summon the strength to make himself reach up and pull the spike free from his back and end his monstrous life. He had given up on trying to break free. Three years. Three years as an Inquisitor, three years imprisoned in his own thoughts. Those years had proven that there was no escape. Even now, his mind clouded.
And then It took control. The world seemed to vibrate around him; then suddenly he could see clearly. Why had he struggled? Why had he worried? All was as it should be.
He stepped forward. Marsh smiled, taking a spike off of the table beside him, then hefting it. His prisoner wore no gag. That would have stopped the screams.
"Please," the prisoner whispered, trembling. Even a Terrisman steward would break down when confronted by his own violent death. The man struggled weakly. He was in a very awkward position, as he had been tied to the table on top of another person. The table had been designed that way, with depressions to allow for the body underneath.
"What is it you want?" the Terrisman asked. "I can tell you no more about the Synod!"
Marsh fingered the brass spike, feeling its tip. There was work to do, but he hesitated, relishing the pain and terror in the man's voice. Hesitated so that he could . . .
Marsh grabbed control of his own mind. The room's scents lost their sweetness, and instead reeked with the stench of blood and death. His joy turned to horror. His prisoner was a Keeper of Terris—a man who had worked his entire life for the good of others. Killing him would be not only a crime, but a tragedy. Marsh tried to take command, tried to force his arm up and around to grab the linchpin spike from his back—its removal would kill him.
Yet, It was too strong. The force. Somehow, it had control over Marsh—and it needed him and the other Inquisitors to be its hands. It was free—
Marsh could still feel it exulting in that—but something kept it from affecting the world too much by itself. An opposition. A force that lay over the land like a shield.
It was not yet complete. It needed more. Something else . . . something hidden. And Marsh would find that something, bring it to his master. The master that Vin had freed. The entity that had been imprisoned within the Well of Ascension.
It called itself Ruin.
Marsh smiled as his prisoner began to cry; then he stepped forward, raising the spike in his hand. He placed it against the whimpering man's chest. The spike would need to pierce the man's body, passing through the heart, then be driven into the body of the Inquisitor tied below.
Hemalurgy was a messy art.
That was why it was so much fun. Marsh picked up a mallet and began to pound.
Marsh watched Vin scream, listening to its sweetness. He smiled, then reached down for her unbroken leg. If only Ruin weren't holding him back.
Then he could kill her. He strained against his bonds, lusting to do her more harm.
No . . . a tiny piece of him thought.
The rain fell, marking a beautiful night. The city of Luthadel lay bedecked in its funereal best, smoldering, some parts still burning despite the wet night. How he wished he'd arrived in time to see the riots and the death. He smiled, the passionate love of a fresh kill rising in him.
No, he thought.
He knew, somehow, that the end was very near. The ground trembled beneath his feet, and he had to steady himself with one hand before continuing his work, snapping Vin's other leg. The final day had arrived. The world would not survive this night. He laughed gleefully, fully in the throes of a blood frenzy, barely controlled as he broke Vin's body.
NO!
Marsh awakened. Though his hands still moved as ordered, his mind rebelled. He took in the ash, and the rain, the blood and the soot, and it disgusted him. Vin lay nearly dead.
Kelsier treated her like a daughter , he thought as he broke her fingers, one at a time. She was screaming. The daughter he never had with Mare . She would have been my niece.
I've given up. Just like I did with the rebellion . Just like he had with Mare. She'd loved him, maybe not romantically, but she had loved him and he'd given up on that love, treated it like it hadn't mattered—wasn't enough.
No , he thought as he broke the fingers on her other hand. Not again. No more giving up.
His hand moved up to her collarbone. And then he saw it. A single bit of metal, glittering in Vin's ear. Her earring. She'd explained it to him once.
I don't remember it, Vin's voice whispered to him from the past. A memory of when Marsh himself had sat with her on a quiet veranda at Mansion Renoux, watching Kelsier organize a caravan below, just before Marsh left to infiltrate the ranks of the Steel Priesthood.
Vin had spoken of her insane mother. Reen said that he came home one day and found my mother covered in blood, Vin had said. She'd killed my baby sister. Me, however, she hadn't touched—except to give me an earring . . .
Don't trust anyone pierced by metal . Spook's letter. Even the smallest bit can taint a man .
The smallest bit.
As he looked closer, the earring—though twisted and chipped—looked almost like a tiny spike.
He didn't think. He didn't give Ruin time to react. Amid the thrill of killing the Hero of Ages, Ruin's control was weaker than it had ever been.
Summoning all the will he had remaining, Marsh reached out.
And ripped the earring from Vin's ear.
Marsh watched what remained of Kelsier's crew find Vin and Elend's body among the flowers.
"You could join them. They will not hold anything against you." Sazed—Harmony's voice said to him.
Marsh shook his head.
They may not hold it against me but it will be difficult for them to look at me and not see all that I have done.
The guilt still ate at him despite Sazed's reassurances. He needed to make amends for all the crimes he'd committed. He left the cave entrance where he rested.
What did you do? With my soulmate bond. It no longer pains me.
A pause.
"Nothing. Ruin and Preservation are reunited and so mankind will no longer feel the pain of separation. It was as Adolnasium willed, I think. I'm not so sure."
Marsh nodded. That was good. That type of pain should never be experienced. He thought of Mare and hoped that wherever she was, she was proud of him.
With one last glance, Marsh turned and walked away.
"What do you think, Saze?" Kelsier asked, staring out over the world. "Is there a way for me to get out of this, and live again in the Physical Realm?"
Sazed hesitated. "No. I do not think so." He patted Kelsier on the shoulder, then vanished.
Huh, Kelsier thought. He holds the powers of creation in twain, a god among gods. And he's a terrible liar.
I'm sorry I can't join you, Kelsier thought, ignoring the guilt eating at him. Vin's accusation was still fresh in his mind. "How much was about us? And how much about you?"
Dockson and Mare would have to forgive him because he wasn't done.
Not yet.
END OF PART ONE