"Avada Kedavra!"
It was his last thought of this world before he, almost accidentally, passed over into the next one. Without a last glance back and before he could even say a word, the softly shimmering veil surrounded his spinning mind in a cooling, thick air, taking him with it. Away from all the pain and regret of the past months. Away from the last of his kin, even though they weren't even related in blood.
Harry had been like a son to him. To him, whose friends were his only family that had been ripped away from the face of the earth, leaving their only child vulnerable and lonely in the care of people who never thought of Harry as one of their own, and who despised him through all his childhood.
Oh, how much Sirius wished he could have been there for his godchild.
Even in his last moments on the face of the earth he had failed to help the ones he loved, as he had once before. The memories of the past crept into his brain and left a bitter trace behind. Trust. Betrayal. Pain. So much pain when he found out what had happened to James and Lily. Anger. Desperation. Wrongful accusations.
12 years. He had waited 12 years.
12 years of waiting for the person he swore to protect. The time they spent together. All these years they could have had…
The chill air around him numbed his mind and cleared his reasoning from all the shame and guilt he felt during the seconds of his passing. At least he had been able to see Harry one more time. He had been there for him at last, trying to protect him.
Fully devoured by the glowing veil, Sirius' conscience was finally pulled away from the chilling entrance of the indescribable place he had fallen into. A quiet murmur seemed to surround him, guiding him beyond and away from the disappearing shimmer of the veil that had already vanished from his mind.
A warm hand found his, dragging him alongside the bright silhouette it belonged to. The gentle press of their palm sparked a flame in his swirling pool of resurfacing memories. Sirius felt a fondness for the connection they shared and soon enough, both found themselves under the falling leaves of a familiar tree. Slowly moving its limbs in the evening sun, the warm sunlight broke through the canopy and lightened up the fiery red hair and green eyes of Lily Potter.
With a gentle pull she dragged Sirius closer to the trunk of the whomping willow, which – to his surprise – stayed as still as it had ever been when one pushed the small root at the bottom of the tree. Sirius' gaze searched for it while getting closer to the tunnel at the foot of the willow that he was most familiar with. A rustling sound from above made him believe the tree had recovered from its stillness, ready to strike, until Sirius caught a glimpse of hazel, much like the colour of the branches, in the eyes of his best friend. A widening smile appeared on both of their faces when their eyes met and locked on each other.
"What took you so long?", said the man whose feet were swinging from the willow with
an ease and the same lightness he showed the world during his lifetime.
Sirius was taken aback to their days at Hogwarts. Being back together with his friends calmed his mind, creating a distraction from the reality he had just left behind. But as great as this perfect world beyond his imagination seemed, Sirius knew he had to tell them. He wanted them to understand him, to forgive him. If he had only… he didn't know. He looked away and sat on the ground below the giant tree.
'What if I don't deserve to be with them?
'I could have done so much more…'
James let himself down from the tree and took a step towards Sirius, sharing a look with Lily, who was stretching out her hand towards him. The two of them crouched next to Sirius and Sirius felt a gentle hand pressing his shoulder. He looked up and felt the tears coming as he clenched his fists on the evergreen grass below the willow. James gave him an inviting smile, as if he knew exactly what Sirius was thinking and had already accepted what happened.
"But I… I couldn't protect him… I only wanted to help! If only…"
Sirius choked on his words before he could end his sentence.
"You're an even bigger idiot than me if you believe we would be mad at you. What you did was so brave… you sacrificed your own life to save our boy. We could never have expected that of you! If you hadn't been there, who knows what would have happened? He survived thanks to you… we know he did. Why else wouldn't he be here with us by now?"
James' words were full of gratitude and hope, and Lily lifted her hand from Sirius' shoulder only to embrace him in a warm, welcoming hug.
"Thank you…", was all he could hear her mutter through the long, ardent waves of hair.
He took one look at James and soon there they were, all of them hugging each other below the gently moving leaves of the green canopy.