Ch. 54

"He seems happy enough, I guess…" Nonna Talia spoke abruptly, cutting into the silence that was permeating the dining room. Valerie tried to catch Dante's eye but he was staring down with an unblinking focus at the ivory lace tablecloth. She wasn't sure she was expected to respond or even if she should but she finally swallowed hard and said, "I'd like to think he's happy—that I make him happy—" Nonna Talia continued on as if Valerie hadn't spoken, "Of course you young people think that's all that matters, your happiness. You make vows and walk away, then just flip and flop from one thing to another but hey, as long as you're happy, eh?"

Those last words were enough to raise Dante's head as he questioned, "What are you trying to say, Nonna? That I'm fickle or a liar or something? That I'm too wishy-washy to know my own mind? Because that's not how this was, at all! Nothing was done on a whim or without careful consideration here! I don't appreciate—" "DON'T you raise your voice to your grandmother!" Nonno Tommaso's harsh admonition was enough to halt Dante in his tracks and again he dropped his gaze to the tablecloth, this time lightly rubbing it with his fingertips. "I'm sorry, Nonno. I apologize, Nonna. I didn't mean to be disrespectful."

Valerie's whole body felt warm and she was sure at times she was forgetting to breathe. She told Dante, she TOLD him this was how it was going to be at this family dinner and he assured her she was wrong. She intended to ream him out when they were alone. If they lived through this inquisition first.

Dante took a deep breath and blew it out slowly. He knew his grandparents were disappointed in him but he'd never experienced this level of anger from them before. His cousins had always teased him in the past, calling him the golden grandchild. He wasn't feeling so golden right now. Suddenly, he felt the weight of letting them down hit him hard and grown man or no, he felt his eyes getting hot as he teared up. Clearing his throat, he softly whispered, "I know you two are upset with me. I don't know if I can explain my side of things without making you madder but I have to try. I want you to understand."

"Explain yourself, then," Nonno Tommaso demanded imperiously. Dante cast an apologetic glance at Valerie and then said, "I can say this to you, even with Val in the room, that I never intended to be a vow breaker. I didn't marry with the idea of bailin' after the first sign of trouble or without knowin' how serious marriage was. There were little cuts, small slices, and miniscule hits that happened durin' my marriage that she and I were able to ignore or let go. I think we thought we were chockin' it up to growing pains. We kept pushin' those slights aside, concentratin' instead on the good things. For a while, it was enough. We were mostly happy until this one huge wave crashed over us and took us down. Everythin' we had buried came rushin' to the surface and there was no brushin' it away anymore. And I was afraid, Nonno, Nonna. Scared to death because this anger I had inside kept buildin' and it wouldn't leave me alone. No matter how I tried to talk myself down or rationalize what I was feelin' away, I couldn't get rid of it. It's like every little thing I thought I'd forgotten or gotten over came back into my head. Her lies set off a chain of events that ultimately ruined our marriage and I couldn't let that go. The anger, the resentment I felt was overtakin' the love I had for her. It's like I was blind before and then the blinders fell from my eyes and I could see and no matter how much I wanted to go back to bein' blind again, it was too late. The damage couldn't be undone; the genie wouldn't go back into the bottle. I didn't want Rocco to grow up seein' that animosity. I couldn't stop feelin' it so I thought it best to remove myself from the situation and I had to let go. I wanted him to grow up seein' us respect each other. I didn't think I would be able to keep showin' her that respect if I stayed with her because my heart, our hearts had already changed too much. I'm sure to you both it probably sounds defeatist, maybe even weak but I didn't know what else to do or see any other way to handle it."

The room once again fell silent as everyone present took in the passion and the pain behind Dante's words. Eventually, Nonna Talia asked Valerie, "And so what, you were there waiting to pick up the pieces, or what?" "No Ma'am. At least, not at first. In our own ways, we were both struggling and grieving. He was losing his marriage; I was dealing with losing my mom. We just wanted to support each other through it all. The closeness, the bond we were building started turning into something more, though."

"So you're good with being the rebound girl?" Dante's head again rose swiftly and he began to protest but Valerie stopped him with an upraised hand before answering, "It's funny. 'Rebound' always carries a negative connotation but it doesn't have to. Rebounding is just hitting something hard and bouncing back. We both hit something hard and we both got hurt. We both decided to bounce back together. To work through that pain side by side. We've been successfully doing it for several months and we managed to fall in love as a result, a side benefit, even a blessing. I'm not going to speak for Dante but I couldn't have gotten through this last year without him-"

"And I couldn't have gotten through all this drama without her, either," Dante asserted.

"—so we decided to live. To just BE. To lean on each other and choose happiness despite the pain. That's it, really. It's not any more complicated than that," finished Valerie.

Talia and Tommaso shared a look and then he said, "Ok." Visibly startled, Valerie's eyes rapidly blinked, signaling her confusion. Dante's eyes widened as he placed his hands on the table and leaned forward. "Ok? Ok what?"

"We just wanted to hear what you kids had to say in your own words. We've heard it, that's all. Now we can eat."

"No way. NO WAY. You guys were sittin' here grillin' us like we were felons and now it's all ok?! It's over? I don't get it."

Nonno Tommaso returned Dante's incredulous glare with a gentle smile as he clearly stated, "This wasn't a small thing you did, Nipote. It's not something to be taken lightly, either. We wanted to make sure you had thought things through before you acted. And you did. We needed to know you could live with what you've done. And it seems you can. We also wanted to know that you two being together wasn't a whim or a casual thing. We're assured that it's not. So it's enough—we're satisfied."

Blinking back the tears that were threatening to fall, Dante quietly queried, "So does that mean you two forgive me then? For tarnishin' the Falconeri name?"

Nonna Talia couldn't contain herself any longer and she got up from her chair and walked around the table to give her grandson a firm hug. "You were never unforgiven, Nipote. We're not angels and you haven't tarnished anything. You are our only daughter's first born—that makes you special to our hearts forever. But you invited that girl into our family and she gave us a great-grandson, which means she's family forever. And families are complex, messy and yes, difficult. None more so than us Falconeris." She dropped a quick kiss on Dante's temple and then addressing Valerie, she asked, "And now he has opened the door to you. We're maddening at worst but we have all the love in the world and plenty to go around. Are you sure you want to walk through it, and stay?"

Flashing her thousand mega-watt smile at Dante's grandparents through her gathering tears, Valerie responded, "Very much so, if you'll let me!"

Nonno Tommaso pushed back from the table and resolutely declared, "Good. That's it, then. Now the rest of the family has been very patient but if we don't let them have this room so they can set up the table, there's gonna be hell to pay!" Aloud he yelled, "Ok, you guys! You can come in now!"

"It's about time!"

"Whatta ya tryin' to do? We're starvin' out here!"

"We thought you were gonna yak forever!"

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Dante pushed past his aunts, uncles and cousins as he dragged Valerie out of the house onto the front porch. After softly closing the door behind him, he leaned against the railing and gave her a somewhat remorseful wince. For a moment, neither of them could speak. Finally, Dante shook his head and hoarsely whispered, "I couldn't be sorrier for what just happened in there. They just completely opened a can on us, didn't they?"

Valerie's eyes widened in dismay and she told him, "I thought your mother was bad! The apple really doesn't fall far from the tree, does it? Wow. That was—"

"Rough." "I was gonna say harsh but rough will do. And it could've been much worse. But I get it. They love you. They wanted to be sure of you. And of me, for that matter." "Do you regret comin' home with me now?" She hesitated for a minute before answering because she wanted to be honest with him. Gathering her thoughts, she shook her head slowly. "No, I don't regret it. I was starting to and I had planned to bless you out for real when we were alone until I heard what they had to say. I think I'll be ok. But PLEASE tell me that that's it—that there's not more to come from the rest of the family?" Dante laughed in relief and with a big grin he responded, "They're the patriarch and matriarch of the family. They speak for everyone so that should be it. Of course my cousins are gonna rag on us a little bit because that's what they do but I think we can handle that, right?" "Eek. I guess so. Sure we can. As long as we do it together, we can stand anything."

He took her hand and jerked her forward, catching her in a tight embrace while rocking her back and forth. "I love you so much," he ultimately breathed against her neck. "You'd better. I love you, too." Dante leaned in to kiss her and Val had to remind him, "Front porch. Neighbors. Prying eyes." "Right. Oops." He settled for a soft, brief kiss on her upturned lips. "You ready to go back in?" "Nooo. But let's do it anyway."

They walked back into the house and made their way to the now noisy dining room. The conversations abruptly halted when they entered the room and unknowingly, Valerie took a small step back, connecting solidly with Dante's chest. As every eye in the room fell on them expectantly, Dante's lips brushed against Val's ear and he muttered, "As long as we do it together, remember?" She took a deep breath and nodded in agreement while Dante loudly addressed the room, exclaiming, "All I know is there'd better be some three and three lasagna on this table somewhere!"

"You know there is, Stud," Cousin Tommy said wryly, adding, "We know how you are when you don't get your way about food…" Immediately indignant, Dante reminded him, "Don't even start with me! That was YOU that ate almost ALL the cannelloni last year, wasn't it? Yeah, I thought so!" A look of complete acceptance passed between them and Dante received it gratefully.

With a look of resignation, Olivia turned around in her seat and told them, "C'mon you two, find someplace to sit so we can eat. You're holdin' up progress here!" They managed to squeeze in across from one another next to Dante's uncles and Olivia decided while watching everyone shift to make room for them to let go of that last bit of lingering anger. She loved her son and her son loved this woman. If she wanted to be at peace with him, she had to peacefully accept his decision.

A prayer was offered for the food and then the decibel level in the room quickly returned to its former chaotic state. Dishes and plates were efficiently passed around the table. Nonno Tommaso bellowed loudly at something one of his daughters-in-law was saying to him and Valerie caught Dante's mirthful gaze. She winked at him in return. She found she was enjoying herself tremendously and she realized he had been right—there really wasn't anything quite like a Natale celebration.

Dante saw Valerie chuckling softly at something his Uncle Phil was telling her and he smiled faintly. He inadvertently glanced in Olivia's direction and she held his stare with one of her own. A brief staring contest ensued before she mouthed, "I love you, Dante" and then refocused her attention on her plate. His heart soared and he suddenly felt lighter than air. He sighed, thinking everything was going to be ok after all. It seemed as though Valerie was right. Rebounding didn't have to be a bad thing. Hitting something hard and being able to bounce back up was a good thing. A great thing. Especially if you had the right person by your side to rebound with, and he did. And if you were going to have to bounce away from something hard, he supposed the absolute best thing to bounce into was love…

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