Chapter 19: Serotonin

It was perhaps a week after his meeting with King Dedede and Meta Knight was simply put, nervous. Today he was meeting with his mentor and was currently entering her vessel, the GranEssex. Despite its large size, the knight could easily navigate it due to how long he had stayed on it before. But that wasn't the main thing on his mind. It was all of those feelings he had right now.

"What exactly am I nervous about? I trust her enough to be able to talk about anything with her, right? So why do I have this feeling?"

No, he knew why he was feeling like that. He was worried about what his mentor's response would be to everything he said. Would she agree with his thoughts about his mentorship and getting stronger? Maybe she'd be able to offer better advice to prevent himself from being brainwashed. No, he shouldn't bring any of that up with her. It'd be better to just focus on having a pleasant conversation.

Soon, he arrived at the door to his mentor's room. With slight hesitation, he knocked and instantly heard someone moving around inside towards the door. As expected, the door opened, and it was Kurabe.

"Ah, Meta, I've been waiting for you! Please, come in!"

Before he could even react, he was dragged into the room.

Second only to his personal cabin, the captain's cabin was the room that Meta Knight was the most familiar with on the GranEssex. This was because it was his mentor's personal quarters and where she preferred to talk about most matters with him. Likely due to the differences in ship size and importance, it was much bigger than the captain's quarters on the Halberd. However, Kurabe kept it almost equally as tidy as the knight did with his. In fact, both rooms were quite similar with their multiple bookshelves, large dresser, desk placed in the center, and even their bed placed far to the side. However, what was different was the fact that there were two sofas and a table arranged in front of the large desk. This was in addition to a portrait of herself with Meta Knight and Mercury that hung on the wall and a small kitchen area. It really did give off the aura that his mentor both worked and lived in this room.

"Please take a seat. The tea should be almost ready." Kurabe said, noticeably locking the door behind her.

However, the knight didn't feel threatened by this. Usually when his mentor locked the door, it meant that she wanted him to be more open with her, like when they talked about private matters. There was also another reason why she did that...

"Meta..." Kurabe uttered in a slightly dark tone with her visor noticeably absent from her head.

Understanding what this meant, Meta Knight silently removed his mask as he took a seat. Honestly, he always found the sofas in his mentor's office to be extremely comfy. In fact, he had fallen asleep on them post-training a few times after an intense session. It was almost as if he had completely forgotten those worries he had earlier.

Moments later, Kurabe returned with tea and the two sat down in a comfortable silence.

"How's life been in Dreamland, Meta? And before you reply with peaceful, you know that's not what I mean." She asked.

"Dreamland has been fine for the most part. There hasn't been any major conflicts since the battle with Void, causing Dreamland to become lazy again."

"Does that bother you?"

The knight gave a slight laugh. "Not anymore. While the lazy lifestyle isn't for me, I understand that it's perfectly normal for others. I think Kirby helped teach me that."

"Well, yes. Though a balance of work and resting is a bit more ideal, so you don't burn yourself out from overwork. That's why we have wellness days like today. How is Kirby, by the way? Is he still worried about Void? I remember how shocking it was when you sent me comparison images between the two. I can only imagine what it must have been like for him..."

The knight took a sip of his tea before he responded.

"He's been doing well. He's becoming much stronger and a lot more creative with his Copy Abilities. As for Void... if he's still worried about that, he hasn't told me since it happened. I'm sure he still thinks about it occasionally, but he appears to be back to his usual happy self."

"Well, I'm sure he does. It would've been quite a shock I imagined. But I'm glad he seems to be doing a lot better now. I'm sure that's because he has a good mentor to help him through it."

Meta Knight let out a bitter chuckle. "What a joke..."

That phrase unintentionally slipped out, but it was enough to draw concern from his mentor.

"Meta, is something wrong?"

It was then he realized what he said.

"Ah, it's nothing, sen- Kurabe. Don't worry about it."

That response only caused her to glare at him in silence.

"Talk." was all that she said.

"To keep a long story short, I-"

"Everything, Meta. No skimping on the details." Kurabe said, earning a sigh from Meta Knight.

"A while back, Kirby and I were having a standard training session. After the session, Kirby bragged that one day he would be the strongest warrior. Or more accurately, that he was already the strongest because he has bested me before."

Meta Knight paused to see if Kurabe wanted to add anything, but she just sat with an unreadable expression.

"So, I let my pride and arrogance get the better of me. Dedede devised a foolish plan to defeat Kirby once and for all that involved the two of us working together as a team. Like an idiot, I accepted it. This resulted in Kirby and I fighting once again. During the last battle, Dedede gave me a mask called the Waxing Crescent Mask."

His mentor nodded. "I've heard of that. It gives the user immense power but at a cost."

"Yes, and the cost was my morals. Sensei, I almost killed him. I almost killed my own student because of my selfishness. How can I not laugh at being called a good mentor? I'm disgusting!" Meta Knight yelled out, eating a lemon drop in a desperate attempt to calm himself down even a little.

Strangely, his mentor's expression didn't change.

"Meta, do you regret what you did?"

"Of course I do. I want nothing more than to make it up to him."

Kurabe smiled upon hearing that. "Meta, if you really were as horrible as you say you are, would you be experiencing so much guilt?"

Meta Knight didn't know how to respond to that.

"Most importantly, what does Kirby think of the situation?"

"...he forgave me after we talked. In fact, he blamed himself for the entire situation, when he had nothing to be sorry for..."

"And did you comfort and help him?"

"Well, yes, but-"

"Meta, you messed up. I'm not sugarcoating this. But, you can always fix things."

"But this all happened because I'm weak. I'm strong as a warrior but as a person, I'm pathetically weak!"

His mentor quietly tilted her head. "And what's wrong with being a bit weak?"

"BECAUSE I'M SUPPOSED TO BE THE STRONGEST!"

Kurabe shrunk back in stunned silence upon hearing that uncharacteristic outburst from her student.

"HOW THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO PROTECT THOSE I CARE ABOUT IF I'M THE ONE WHO CONSTANTLY NEEDS TO BE SAVED!? IF I'M CONSTANTLY HURTING THE PEOPLE I CARE ABOUT!? I SHOULD BE ABOVE THIS! BUT I'M NOT!" His voice quivered as he hid his face in his hands in shame.

"I... I'm...!" His normally calm demeanor began to crumble. It was like everything, the frustration, the anger, and the sadness he had been keeping bottled up inside him suddenly burst out with a few quiet sobs.

With only a sad gaze, Kurabe stood up and sat next to him.

"Meta... you've been keeping those feelings inside you for so long, haven't you?" She uttered quietly as she draped her cape over him, pulling him into a hug while patting his head.

"It's not healthy to do that..."

Her hug tightened.

"So please... just let it all out..."

As much as he didn't want to humiliate himself any more than he already had, he just couldn't hold it in any longer. With a sudden burst of emotions, he accepted his mentor's embrace and words of comfort.

It felt like hours passed since that moment, though it was likely only a couple of minutes. Meta Knight now laid on the couch next to Kurabe, who was quietly stroking his head as if he were a child. As much as he wanted to tell her to stop and leave him alone, he didn't have the energy to. Honestly, he just felt exhausted, and his eyes stung from crying so much. It was also because he found it strangely comforting, but he didn't want to say that. He had already shamed himself in front of this woman enough today.

"Meta, let's talk about your mentorship with Kirby. Is he stronger now than he was before he became your student?"

There was a pause, as if the knight needed to think about his answer.

"Yes, but that doesn't mean anything. He was strong before and probably would have become just as strong without me." Meta Knight responded dejectedly.

"Really? So, his skills in combat would be the same as they are now? You told me before when you first met him you thought he had incredible potential but needed help to realize it."

She then handed him a sheet of paper, which the knight instantly recognized as a photocopy of the last Copy Ability Exam's notes.

"Look at him now, Meta. Look at his progress and tell me you didn't have a hand in that."

Meta Knight remained silent as he read over the notes, indicating steady progress.

"Ok, let's try a different approach as well. You've told me before that Kirby has considered quitting, multiple times actually. Do you know why he hasn't? Because of you, Meta. You've been there for him whenever he needed you the most."

"But I caused him pain!"

"And I caused you pain before, haven't I? Arguably much worse than you've ever done to Kirby. Would you consider me to be a horrible mentor?"

"Of course not, but-"

"Then be honest with yourself, Meta."

"...I'm not sure how to be."

Kurabe gave a playful squeeze to one of his cheeks, making him slightly annoyed before she continued her head stroking.

"Then let's start with this, Meta... despite everything that happened up to this point, are you happy with your life with Dreamland?"

The knight remained silent for a moment.

"Why do you ask?"

His mentor appeared to avert her eyes as she gave a slight sigh.

"After that incident where you attempted to take over Dreamland, HQ sent me an order to retrieve you. They wanted to disband the Meta-Knights and absorb your entire crew into the GranEssex."

Hearing that made him both furious and a bit offended.

"But... they can't do that! They listed us as a PMC! That means we aren't their subordinates!"

"I know, Meta, I know. I told them that, but they wouldn't listen. They know that you work closely with my crew and believed that it would be more efficient, as Dreamland could handle itself."

Meta Knight fell into a quiet yet seething state the more that he thought about it.

"However... I rejected that proposal. Do you want to know why?"

"Because you'd know I'd fight you to the death before I'd accept it?"

His mentor gave a slight chuckle.

"True. But it's also because every time I've directly spoken to you, you feel happier than you've ever been during your time on the GranEssex. When we were just talking about your life in Dreamland, I... noticed that you smiled a lot more than you ever did. Because of that, I wanted to protect your happiness, so that's why I asked you to start sending reports on the various dangerous events that happened in Dreamland. To prove to the higher-ups that your assistance is needed there. Do you want to know what happened next? The moment I started sending those things, I haven't heard a word about it from them since."

There was a moment of silence between them.

"...though it does slightly upset me that I'm apparently so miserable to you that you couldn't be happy until you left my ship."

Kurabe gave him an annoyed pout.

"S... sensei..." The knight uttered in slight embarrassment.

"...Meta, I know part of this originates from you feeling weak because you were brainwashed so many times... do you want to know how many times I was possessed or brainwashed?"

Meta Knight looked up at her with questioning eyes.

"...I lost count after 22." She replied with a smile.

Her student only blinked in surprise.

"So, remember, Meta, if the former second greatest warrior in the galaxy could fall to mind manipulation so many times, there's no doubt that the greatest could as well, right?"

There was only silence as the knight quietly looked at her with a doubtful expression.

"I understand how you feel right now. You're frustrated and angry with yourself because you believe that you're weak for being unable to prevent yourself from falling under someone else's control. Yes, you can't stop yourself from getting brainwashed. Yes, people will try to mentally break you to force you to submit. But if there's one thing they can't break or control it's a strong spirit that can rebound from those setbacks."

Meta Knight stayed silent for a moment to think.

"Thank you, sensei, truly. But my inability to stop falling under another's control is one thing. What am I supposed to do about my arrogance?"

His mentor let out a sigh.

"Meta, let me ask you again, what's wrong with being weak? You are undoubtedly one of the strongest beings in the universe. Shouldn't that be enough? You have nothing to prove to anyone."

While her words made sense, Meta Knight still wasn't sure about what to think. He defeated Galacta Knight and helped defeat the destroyer of worlds, Void. He should be satisfied with that alone, but a loud part of him just wasn't.

Seeing the uncertainty on his face, Kurabe asked another question.

"Meta, look at it this way. Say Kirby does end up becoming the strongest warrior in the galaxy. How would you feel?"

Meta Knight sat in silence thinking about that question with multiple emotions flowing through him. Jealousy, anger, sadness. But the strongest emotion he felt was the one that surprised him the most. Pride.

"I would be proud of him but..."

"But you would also be jealous. Trust me, I felt the same towards you initially, Meta."

He must've looked quite surprised by this, as his mentor gave a slight frown. She then pinched both of her student's cheeks and pulled them in slight irritation, likely to make sure she still had his attention.

"Meta, what's more important to you? The life you have in Dreamland or being the strongest? If you had to choose one, what would it be?"

Images of his crew, his friends like Dedede and most importantly his student, Kirby, flashed through his mind. The more he thought, the more emotional he became. If it weren't for the people in his life, he doubted he would still even be alive. No amount of power could replace that.

"I choose my life."

Kurabe smiled in response. "That's exactly what I thought. You really are my greatest student."

It probably was because he was already in a fairly emotional state right now, but the knight began to feel tears rolling down his cheeks as he gave a small smile.

"Thank you... Kurabe-sensei."

His mentor returned it with a pat on the head.

"Don't worry about it, Meta. I'm always here to help you when I can. Whether it be for advice or if you need my assistance in general."

She then gave another smile.

"Or even if you simply just need a chest to cry into. Not only because it can be a good way to release your pent-up emotions, but also because I don't get to hug you as much as I'd like any more...and it's because you're quite adorable when you're emotional like this..."

"This was the worst mistake of my life..." Meta Knight grumbled as he felt his face become hot. "OW!"

Kurabe pinched his cheek in annoyance before standing up.

"Where are you going?"

He quickly sat up to see her walking towards the kitchen area.

"I'm sure you're still a bit distressed over all those frustrations you told me about. How about I make you some chocolate fondant?"

There was a moment of pause with his answer.

"You don't have to but... I'd appreciate it." He replied quietly.

Kurabe gave a hum in response as she began to cook.

In contrast to Meta Knight's low cooking ability, his mentor was a master in the kitchen. Though this is partially attributed to a safety measure The Organization gave out after a mass poisoning in another flagship that led to requiring all of the Big Four to start cooking their own meals. Due to this, Kurabe often cooked for herself, Mercury, and even Meta Knight himself back when he was still her student. One of his favorite dishes that she made was chocolate fondant, a small chocolate cake filled with chocolate and served with vanilla ice cream. It was considered a signature recipe of the GranEssex and Meta Knight loved it to the point where he asked his mentor for the recipe so Sailor could make it on the Halberd. While all the attempts Sailor made were delicious, they strangely didn't compare to when Kurabe made it.

Regardless, it did sound like something he could use right now. Honestly, there was nothing like a bit of chocolate to help bring one's mood back up.

As Kurabe continued to cook, Meta Knight waited at the table and thought about the previous conversation.

"Where do I start?" The knight asked suddenly.

"Hmm?"

"Where do I start with combating my arrogance? It's not just something I can defeat in battle."

He heard his mentor give a bit of a chuckle.

"That's exactly your issue, Meta. You treat your inner demons like it's a one-on-one duel. But that's simply not the case. You have a family, and you have friends. It's okay to rely on them. Let them help you."

Somehow, he had a vague feeling she would say something along those lines. He then gave a sigh.

"That's difficult. I've never been good at sharing my emotions, sensei. You know that more than anyone..."

"Come now. Are you seriously saying that asking for help is harder than fighting a God of Destruction?"

The knight only scowled.

Then Meta Knight's gaze then wandered to his mask. Throughout his life, many people accuse him of hiding himself with it. He had always ignored those comments but what if that was true? Maybe he should just get rid of it. No, that wouldn't change anything. Even without the mask, he would still be the same exact person he is now. Though, maybe he could stand to lose it every once in a while.

"And finished." Kurabe said, breaking Meta Knight out of his thoughts.

She then placed a plate in front of him before sitting with her own serving at the table. Immediately, she noted the look on his face and became silent.

"Meta, is something wrong?"

"I'm debating on what to do with my mask." He said, honestly a bit surprised at how easy it was to say that.

She chuckled in response, making the knight instantly regret doing so. "Oh, I'm not laughing at you. It's ultimately up to you. But... you're a lot more adorable without it."

She reached over and poked his cheek, to his annoyance.

"Thank you... for the meal." He uttered awkwardly.

To which Kurabe just gave another chuckle.

As they began eating, his mentor quietly spoke up again.

"...I say that, but I already know how you are with your face. So... remove your second mask."

"But if I do that, I'll be making myself vulnerable."

He then took a bite of his cake as Kurabe sighed.

"Meta, you can be both weak and strong at the same time. You can't be the best all the time, so just try to be the best when it matters. Accepting weakness is a strength in of itself."

Seeing how he still appeared to be a bit skeptical, Kurabe gave another sigh.

"Meta, do you know what kintsugi is?"

"Kin...tsugi...?"

"It's repairing broken objects with gold or silver with the understanding that an object is more beautiful for being broken. By accepting your weakness, you can make yourself stronger. Do you understand what I'm saying?"

The knight then became silent as he thought about what he was told.

"I... I understand..." He then continued to eat.

"Now... are there any other problems you're hiding from me? I'd like to know before I decide if I have to beat it out of you or not."

He quickly looked back up.

"No, sensei, I have no other problems at the moment."

"Really? How's your love life then?"

Immediately a bright red blush shot across his face, and he nearly choked on his food.

"Sensei, that's none of your business." He gasped once he could finally breathe again.

"So still single then."

Somehow his face became even more red.

"Why did I even bother coming here...?" He uttered in embarrassment.

"You came because you missed me." She replied playfully.

"Missed you? Yes. The constant jokes at my expense, not so much."

"Oh, have a sense of humor, would you?"

"That sense of humor of yours is probably why you're still single after all these years." He shot back with a smirk, causing Kurabe to puff up her cheeks in anger.

After taking another bite of his meal, Meta Knight instantly felt his cheeks being pulled repeatedly in fury by Kurabe.

"META! I thought I raised you to be better than this! Haven't I told you to respect your el- I mean superiors?! I may not be your mentor anymore, but I am still your superior technically! You do not disrespect me!"

"Owsh! Shorry, shenshei... owch! Ish won't happen agai- OWSH!"

Immediately after he said that, she stopped. As Meta Knight was rubbing his cheeks, he noticed that there were tears forming in Kurabe's eyes.

"Sensei, are you ok? I'm sorry, I didn't mean to-"

His mentor shook her head. "It's ok, Meta. I'm just glad that you're feeling better. That's all."

"...and I have you to thank for that, sensei."

With a quiet smile, she patted him on the head.

As they both finished their meal, Kurabe suddenly spoke up again.

"...Meta, would you like to stay another day on the GranEssex?"

This made him slightly confused.

"You said today was a wellness day. Doesn't that mean you have missions to do tomorrow?"

His mentor gave a grin.

"I'm one of the greatest warriors in the galaxy and one of the highest-ranking members of The Organization. They can't stop me from taking another day off even if they tried."

He took a moment to think about it.

"...let me contact my crew first. I need to let them know that I won't be back for a while." He said with a small smile.

Honestly, they probably wouldn't mind it. After all, they did say he needed a break anyway.

This was a bit of a difficult chapter to write, I must admit. I hope everyone enjoys it.

As for the next one...it might just be the final one.