Warnings: Same as ever.
eleven - forward now, boldly
No one wants to go near the exploded Workshop, so naturally that means Isu and Khun lead the way in. Everyone is tense and no one had felt comfortable staying behind. Bam, for some reason, had set Miseng in Horyang's arms before following.
The reason for this becomes evident when they see a man standing casually in front of the burning building. One look at the destruction. The sky over the Workshop is rippling. It's not a storm or an attack. It's an angry administrator, they realize after a moment. One very angry administrator.
Khun once again is very glad to have Bam back, but good god does his presence invite weird shit to happen or what?
Bam walks faster as something simply explodes in the distance. A building piece crumbles.
Bam pauses as the man pulls the sucker from his mouth. Fear runs through Khun's entire body and he's very glad he hasn't had lunch yet.
Jinsung Ha walks over to them and straightens Bam's collar. "What brings you here, Ole?" There's a soft undercurrent to his voice and he smooths down Bam's messy hair. Bam tolerates it.
To his credit, Bam looks completely unimpressed. "This wasn't necessary, Master."
"You killed innocent children!" Horyang's expression of rage really is like an angry bear. Khun admires it. "You killed people just trying to survive!"
Ha Jinsung regards him thoughtfully like he's going through the motions of existing. "It wouldn't be the first time. Or the last either." He pats Bam on the head, who blinks at him in a lack of comprehension. Something itches in Khun's stomach. "If they survive, the tower will take them up anyway. If they don't, it's better than suffering, isn't it? Being twisted into things beyond their own understanding because of a place that doesn't view them as human."
"You're not going to take responsibility for this?" demands the Yeon, who Khun seriously wonders about. "What kind of example are you giving as if FUG isn't just as terrible?"
Jinsung tosses his lollipop stick into the still burning flames. "FUG lost its way a long time ago," he says. He's very matter of fact about this, very clean. "But even so, there are things that are lingering in the background, thoughts that are desired but we can't talk about. My friend wants the workshop and all of its boons to burn, so making an example here is the best place to start."
"What about the weapons trade?" Isu can't help but ask.
Jinsung regards him. He smiles, crooked and old. "What about it?"
Isu's eyes widen and it hits Khun like a truck. He looks at Bam, who merely blinks at him.
"You already started taking over suspendium distribution, haven't you?" He asks.
Jinsung says nothing, just looks at him. There's a glimmer of something in his eyes, though that could be from the fire. It's not hard to breathe yet, but it might be soon. They should get moving. But he can't, his feet feel glued to the cement, burning with rage and loss and pain as it sinks in.
"That was why Bam was put into the workshop, so you could and the workshop couldn't move against you."
"No, that was the decision of enough of the council who think age equals braincells." Jinsung scratches behind his own ear. "Mirchea, despite everything, doesn't want to run a dictatorship. Still, there needs to be some order to a group of abandoned, fucked up individuals who need to heal in a place where recovery is incredibly difficult. Not impossible, but difficult. Enough people thought Ole was a terrible investment and he's been arguing with them ever since. And now he has a leg to stand on. Many, depending on his mood."
That is one of the most terrifying things Khun has ever heard but he doesn't want to think about it. Because if he does, he'll think of Bam messaging someone named Luslec Mirchea Grace at the dead of night without a word to anyone and like it's every day, with the thought of his best friend learning to keep secrets better and well and enough.
"We've confirmed the altercation," Bam says quietly. He's not looking at Jinsung, but on the destruction the man had left, likely with very little shinsu on his part. "We should retreat."
"Karaka's not here, kid." Jinsung's voice is gentle, a softness that Khun hasn't heard from an authority figure since Lero-ro at least. The name strikes a chord but Khun can't put the pieces together. His heart is thumping so loudly in his ears, disgustingly noisy, everything out of place.
Bam's lips twitch. "That is hardly relevant, Master."
Jinsung sighs. "If you say so, kid."
"I do. And he is not mine to resolve." Something in Bam's eyes burns. "He's yours, Master."
Ah fuck. He remembers who Karaka is now.
Jinsung doesn't disagree. "I know and I'll be taking care of it. Now scoot before the administrator decides to eat you."
"He would not be the first to try."
Wangnan snorts but it sounds way too hysterical to take seriously.
Somehow they all make it back to the hotel without dying or being arrested. Which would be a new experience but that didn't mean Khun particularly wanted to experience it.
Everyone seems to retreat to their rooms, except Bam. Bam waits, not watching him, but looking out the giant glass windows towards the destruction. He barely blinks, eyeing it with maybe curiosity.
Khun bites his tongue and sits on the bed. At the sound of the creaking bedsprings, Bam turns to look at him. His mouth twitches and Khun realizes that Bam is trying to reassure him, in some way. He can sense discomfort. Either he has much worse of a poker face than he thinks, or this is just going to be his life with a hyper-aware best friend from now on.
Isu shuts the door and sits between them. He offers Khun a reassuring smile and Khun tries hard not to scowl.
"Bam," he says quietly.
Bam's eyes snap from Isu to him, expectant. "Yes, Khun-ssi?"
"You're no longer allowed to punish yourself." The words fall from his mouth too smoothly. "Not physically. Not emotionally. It's not… I don't want that to happen."
Is he imagining it or is there satisfaction in those eyes? But when Bam dips his head, nodding in agreement. "If that's what you wish for Khun-ssi."
There are a lot of things Khun wishes for and one of them is that he doesn't have to order Bam to take care of himself. "It is," he says at last.
"Then I will not do so. What is your suggested alternative?"
Khun thinks. He should have expected a question for an alternative. "You've gained a lot of skills over the past eight years right?"
"I have," he agrees.
Khun nods, feeling a sting of dislike. He doesn't want to do this, but it will work. "When you do a mistake worth punishment, not minor things that everyone does like tripping and the like, you'll teach me how to do one of those things. If you can't teach me, then we'll keep track until you can."
Bam's eyes flicker with something. "Is that not forward?"
"It's important for a team to share experiences." Khun keeps his voice steady. "If I'm not available, you can always teach someone else."
Bam tilts his head. Then he nods. "Understood, Khun-ssi. I will do so. I am sorry to have gone against your wishes."
Khun swallows his urge to vomit. "Thank you, Bam." He takes a few deep breaths until the calm is genuine. "Do you know what Jinsung Ha is after?"
"Destruction of the current system, like much of FUG." Bam presses a hand to his side, almost absentmindedly. "Much of FUG's group is divided on the methodology but he may be…" Bam wrinkles his nose. "Attached to me."
His lips purse as if he's trying not to laugh.
"Can't say I blame him," Isu says. Khun swears Bam is almost rolling his eyes. "Are all FUG members like this?"
Bam tilts his head. "They are now, because of disagreements. Or quite a few are. The Elders and a few slayers prefer obedience to… ah…"
"Freedom?" Isu offers.
Bam shakes his head. "Creativity."
Khun disagrees, wholeheartedly.
It's tiring.
Viole isn't sure why, but he is very tired. He feels limited in functionality.
Even the relief of a solid, proper order from Khun-ssi only feels bitter and hollow, yawning in his stomach. It is the necessary protocol, yes but for Khun-ssi to do so, for Viole to push him to do so…
It isn't something that Bam would do. Of this, he's quite certain. And clearly Khun did not enjoy it (Though if he believes you are supposed to enjoy giving orders, he will suffer unnecessarily on his path won't he? Or isn't Khun the kind of person to enjoy giving orders?) nor does he seem inclined to continue doing so in a normal setting.
What would Bam do in this situation? Apologize obviously, which he has, but was it for the correct ordeal or mistake? Smile more?
He probably wouldn't hurt himself at all on purpose, except in battle where it could be inevitable. He wouldn't have put Khun-ssi into such a conundrum in the first place.
He wouldn't have let this fester in such a way. He would be… human? By now?
Monster, says an old, dead voice in the back of his mind, glaring at Bam rather than Viole for existing, screaming of hate and loathing, unaware that he's just a great cog in the murder machine.
Perhaps Bam wouldn't be human, but he would be able to fake it much better.
Viole brushes his ponytail and exhales, settling back on the hotel room sofa. It's an inconvenience that Miss Sophia is likely dead. She would know how Emily had gone from human to ignition weapon and back again and would be kind enough to explain the mechanics of it to him.
Perhaps Horyang-ssi has some ideas.
Viole gets to his feet to go ask him.
Before he can make it there though, he hears Prince yelling in another room. It doesn't sound like video game arguments.
There's a prickle of interest, vaguely. Prince can take care of himself better than when they started climbing together but he's still very young and very… overzealous. It's best to stop him from picking fights.
Then he hears Wangnan says, "Look that's great but that's still too many people. And you're not used to him. You're… overprotective."
For some reason, Viole can't help but think, I don't want to hear this. And he finds himself walking away, unthinking of why he doesn't want something, or why he desires to not have something.
That shouldn't necessarily matter, yes?
It takes a couple of hours but Khun is calm again and they've made the decision for him to join Sweet and Sour's motley crew for the time being. Ran and Novick aren't happy, but they're going new teammate hunting in the meantime. Khun freely admits his judgement may be flawed at this point, and they need more connections before Rachel learns the duty of light-bearers is to actually make allies beyond "who is the most pitiful or who is the strongest tool" and like it or not, who is left in his team can do that? Plus finding a decent light bearer is hard and leaning on Bam would definitely be a mistake.
Besides, he did promise to help Miseng and quite frankly she looked ready to be terrifying in a few years.
For a moment, he thinks of Rak and nearly misses the bastard.
This passes quickly, he's not soft.
Still, by the end of it (and it's still not the end, he still has to plan out training with these idiots, what do they do without Bam and possibly that teddy bear guy?), he's more than happy to flop into bed, dignity be damned.
But before he can, his nose is hit by the smell of food. Decent food.
Bam is at the hotel kitchenette, quietly stirring. A rice cooker is puttering along, and there's a smell like spices.
Bam slowly raises his head and for a moment, Khun can see the Slayer Candidate Jue Viole Grace in a deadly, intense way, deep in thought and focused. He forgot that Bam can get… intense on something.
Then Bam blinks and the image is broken. "Welcome back, Khun-ssi," he says in that mild "I'm being good" voice that says nothing is off base. "Where is everyone else?"
"Panicking," Khun replies. "Isu and the others have a test in three days."
"Ah." Bam goes back to what he's doing, but he's likely still listening. "And you, Khun-ssi?"
"I'll be joining your band of misfits for the time being." He smirks to make it seem like this was planned, like it's not weird and nothing is wrong.
Bam's shoulders lower a little. They don't sag, but there's some kind of relief. He'll take it. "They are fine with this?"
"I think besides that Ehwa girl, we're fine. No idea what's on her mind."
"She's very honest, generally speaking," Bam replies, finally putting down the knife. Khun suddenly has much less of a pressing urge to duck. "You will hear some of the truth in due time."
"And the rest of it?"
Bam shrugs. His lips twitch. "I could not tell you. She is rather dishonest with me. It's contradictory."
A tsundere. That should not be funny. "What are you making?"
"Beef stew over rice," Bam replies. "Would you like some?"
He can say no. Khun knows this. He knows this intimately. He wants to sleep so much.
"You know," he says over the low gurgle of his stomach. "I would, actually."
Khun looks up just in time to see the faintest trace of a smile on Bam's face before it disappears altogether. "Just a moment."
Khun wishes he was religious and could pray to god. He doesn't know how his heart is going to survive this.