Chapter 1: Double Dipper
"I dunno, do you wanna go grab a couple sodas or something?"
Despite being the most innocent question Dipper could have heard, he couldn't help but feel unease over it, and he wasn't sure why. Was it just his trademark overthinkingness, or was something actually up? He opted to push down that nagging impulse in his head to investigate. 'Maybe I should think a bit less for once and just hang out, I really need it right now'.
Opting to enjoy the moment with his clone bro ('Brothlone? Blone? Clonether?' Dipper couldn't help the obsessive urge to abbreviate it), he took out sodas from the cooler they brought to Wendy's secret roof hideout, and handed one to his brone ('perfect').
"Some night, huh?" said Tyrone, as the two stared at the vast night sky, their interest captivated by a beautiful shooting star that freely flew across the sky as briefly as it seemed to exist. They were glad Mabel was having the time of her life, at least.
This moment spent stargazing was nice, simple, and both Dipper and Tyrone wished they could just be above all this, free as the shooting star, somewhere where they belonged, as they thought of the Big Dipper in the sky.
The two then opened their cans of Pitt Cola at, unsurprisingly, precisely the same time, the sudden pop and fizz quickly bringing them, away from their daydreaming ('nightdreaming?') back down to Earth, and to the reality of the unpredictable array of infinite probabilities that a party always brought. Dipper sighed.
"Do you think we even have a chance with Wendy?" he asked, wondering if tonight's B-movie insanity was even worth the crush that he slowly realized seemed hopeless.
He clarified, "I mean, she's 15, we're 12", knowing it wasn't necessary, since Tyrone undoubtedly knew every thought racing through his head, and vice versa, as was proved many times tonight. Still, it was nice to vent to someone who would understand, even if it was yourself.
"I don't know man. I hope so, but we're making zero progress the way we're doing it. The only good conversation you ever had with her was when you didn't do any of that list stuff", said Tyrone with a look of ashamed certainty.
"I know."
Dipper hadn't forgotten these facts, after all he *had* brought them up earlier to the others. But, hearing his former clone-friend-turned-cliche-evil-clone-turned-potential-best-friend repeat it felt...eye-opening. The fact that his main enemy of tonight admitted it, and happened to, in an ironic twist that irked Dipper, be himself, made it all click for him.
"Mabel was right, I do get in my own way".
"LITERALLY!" the two Dippers exclaimed in unison. As Tyrone made an over-exaggerated mind-blown gesture with his hands, Dipper scrunched up his face in a very Mabel way to hide his shame at the surprising-truth-that-shouldn't-really-be-surprising: that, yet again, he was the one who was behind this week's stupid problem from the get go. However, he promptly unscrunched his face after realizing it didn't make sense to hide his shame around himself.
'Man, self-love is easy when you have clones! I mean, it's like the perfect way to self-improvement; you can literally question and encourage yourself to be more clever, mature, and...attractive...', thought Dipper.
As Dipper clinked his soda can with Tyrone's, that idea of questioning oneself somehow stuck in his mind, and suddenly, acting entirely on impulse, Dipper decided he had to prevent Tyrone from drinking his soda as quickly as humanly possible. Unfortunately, that meant Dipper's mind hadn't caught up to his body and so he flailed wildly at Tyrone, accidentally slapping him multiple times before knocking the Pitt Cola out of his hand and far off the roof of the Shack.
"Woah, dude, what the heck was that about!?" Tyrone cried. "Is this some kind of clone madne- oh right, I'm the clone..."
Dipper frustratingly tried to piece together the problem while speaking, and so he blurted out "COLA! LIQUID! MELT!" before partially regaining enough composure to more comprehensively chastise his brone.
"I know we're, like, exactly the same, but how could you, me, forget the thing this planet is mostly made up of that could very easily kill you!?"
"Tyrone didn't expect to feel even more like an idiot than he had when he saw Wendy with Robbie 5 minutes ago, but he reasoned it was in his DNA to outdo himself at self-sabotage.
"Wow...Thanks for uh, catching me on my stupidity there".
"Thought I'd return the favor".
Tyrone knew what he meant. In a way, turning against Dipper helped him realize how stupid the whole cloning idea was, and reiterated what he had to do.
"Well, Dipper Classic, what say we test our hypothesis". Dipper nodded and gave a smile that betrayed his anxiety. It was time to go downstairs and see what everything they went through tonight was all for.
Once the two got off the roof and onto the ground, they peered through the window and scanned among the now-mostly-empty dance floor for Wendy, finding her leaning against the wall, bobbing her head up and down to the, admittedly really catchy, music. As Dipper made a mental note to ask Soos for his mixtape, Tyrone spoke up.
"Well, it looks like it's our last chance, and luckily Robbie's gone, so it's as perfect a time as any. Don't waste it, man".
"Dipper gave a thumbs up and headed for the door, stopping as his still ever-present anxiety reminded him of the weight of that accursed list in his jacket, pulling him down like he let it do all throughout tonight. He quickly pulled it out and looked at Tyrone with a grin, who answered in kind. No words needed to be said. The two promptly grabbed the opposite ends of the list and quickly tore it to shreds.
"Go get her".
Dipper went in, pretending not to hear his sister's obnoxiously loud attempts to get his attention, and walked straight towards Wendy, trying and failing to strut confidently but not too confidently, as Tyrone peered through the window sweating in fear and anticipation.
Thankfully Wendy didn't see how awkward his "walking" was, and only noticed him right as he was a couple feet away, looking down at him with that laidback delight that Dipper found so charming about her, along with, like, a million other things.
"Yo dude, where have ya been?" said the giggling redhead, somehow mesmerizing Dipper. "You practically missed the whole party. Though, Soos is playing the best music of the night, and Mabel seems to be carrying the whole thing, so luckily for you it seems we're not stopping anytime soon".
Dipper chuckled nervously, before whispering to himself "Agh, stop laughing, you look weird". "Heh, sorry, Grunkle Stan forced me to get rid of some...litter...heh". He quickly changed the subject. "Hey, so uh, I was thinking..."
Dipper briefly paused, but he remembered what all his clones died for, what all of tonight's stupidity was based around, and knew that it was now or never. He swallowed everything and forced himself to finish his question with the most aggressively neutral face he could muster.
"Would you maybe want to have a quick little dance, together?"
To his surprise and utter confusion, Wendy laughed. "Of course dude! Come on, let's take over this dance floor and show Mabel and her posse what we're capable of". Dipper's face transformed into pure glee, briefly making him look like Mabel, and whispered "HAHAH, YES YES YES" under his breath, believing Wendy wouldn't hear it.
The teen chuckled and shook her head, then went to the dance floor and jokingly shouted her challenge towards Mabel and her friends. Dipper joined in, and what followed was what would later be referred to by Stan as the stupidest dance-off he ever had the displeasure of wasting his Saturday night watching. Tyrone's pride in his progenitor overcame any cringe he felt towards his, and by extension his own, awful dance skills, and so he stood there the entire night, imagining himself in the latter's non-paper shoes.
"This is an affront to everything the 70s died for", said Grunkle Stan.
The party went on for what felt like hours, until Soos suddenly fell asleep and drooled on his DJ equipment, causing it to malfunction and keep repeating his "YEAH" stock sound effect until Grunkle Stan destroyed it with a baseball bat.
"That piano's coming out of your paycheck, Soos".
"B-but I own it...".
"And?"
Knowing this meant the night was truly over, Mabel and her friends hugged as the latter two left to get their clothes for their slumber party. Wendy left as well, but not before giving Dipper props for having the confidence to do those human contortions that nobody would call dancing for hours.
"I don't think I know anyone braver than you man. Can't wait to hang out with you again!" said Wendy as she waved goodbye and left on her bike, riding into the night.
The elated 12-year-old went outside, audibly laughing and cheering to himself along the way, not caring that Stan and Soos were staring at him, very confused. "I did it, Tyrone I did it!"
"Awesome job, dude", said Tyrone as the two fist bumped, before doing a smorgasbord of random hand gestures that somehow synchronized and collided perfectly. "I guess all it really took was just going up to her like a normal guy and not being stupid, who knew it was that simple?" he said sarcastically, chuckling.
"Yeah, I think we actually have a real shot at this now. She actually complimented me for being confident enough to dance terribly!" said Dipper proudly, ignoring the thought in the back of his head that maybe his "moves" inverted his chances to a negative percentage. "I guess from now on we should plan...to not plan at all, eh eh?" teased Dipper. Tyrone was hurtfully unimpressed.
"That was lame and we knew it".
"Yeah, let's just go upstairs", sighed Dipper.
As the two snuck their way upstairs past Grunkle Stan (who was in the living room dealing with Mabel yabbering on about how "amaze-tacular-rrific" the night was) and arrived in their room, they heard what seemed like whispering coming from their closet.
"Hey, it it me or does that sound like...we?" inquired Dipper.
"Overuse of this pun of self-identification aside, yeah..."
Dipper carefully opened the closet door to find...
'Wait, 3 and 4!?'
The two formerly missing-presumed-melt-dead clones were staring at him with that trademark look of absolute 12-year-old fear on their faces, the weird kind Dipper realized and was slightly ashamed that that was what others saw 24/7. But that didn't matter now.
Dipper's cautious expression quickly dissolved into one of pure joy. "Guys, you're back!"
With one glance at the can of Pitt Cola in Dipper's hand, the two shrieked in terror and began to run off.
"YOU'LL NEVER GET U-"
Was what 3 said before the two suddenly bumped into Tyrone, sending them all crashing to the floor. As 4 quickly stood and pulled 3 up, they both saw the 2 on Tyrone's hat and screamed once again.
4 looked at Dipper angrily. "Are you kidding we, Dipper Classic!? You replaced Tyrone ALREADY!? First you kill all of our brothers in cold ink and now you try and pretend like nothing happened!?" Dipper was too confused to respond, so Tyrone spoke up.
"What? Guys, it's not like that at all, me and Dipper had a talk and we realized that this plan junk was stupid. He actually got to dance with Wendy and all he had to do was, y'know, just talk to her and not be a weird overthinking mess".
3 scowled in response. "Yeah right, that's exactly what we'd make our clones say if we were Dipper, which we are! There's no way he actually succeeded without the plan; we don't have access to the secret of how normal people talk to each other!"
"I can't believe I was exactly like this just a few hours ago", sighed Dipper. "Guys, let's just calm down now, it's all over. Hey, maybe we could-" Dipper was cut off by 4.
"NO! W-we don't know what's going on with you but y-you're not Dipper, you're not who he should be! Come on Tracey, let's get out of here".
"Tracey?" asked a confused Tyrone.
"But where do we go, Quattro?"
"Quattro, really?" said an unamused Dipper.
"Anywhere but here, but don't worry, eventually Dipper Classic will realize why he was wrong to dare think differently. Then, he'll come back to us".
And with that, the two sped out of the room, leaving Dipper and Tyrone utterly confused as to what just happened.
Tyrone was the first to speak. "Those were the best names they could come up with for themselves? Hopefully those were the kinds of lame ideas we left behind tonight". Dipper snickered at the fact that at one point in time, he would have thought Quattro was a thing he would have labelled himself as.
"Heh, but you know I'm kind of sad they left us. I mean, imagine the four of together, all solving mysteries and fighting monsters. What could stop four Dippers?
"...One Mabel", said Tyrone.
"Ugh you're right, she'd still find a way to mess things up for us", Dipper bemoaned.
As if on cue, Mabel suddenly kicked the door open and waltzed in, pure childish wonder beaming in all her movement and expressions. Dipper and Tyrone subsequently froze completely in utter fear and uncertainty. Dipper realized he couldn't bring himself to do anything. 'Ugh, guess some things don't change'.
Mabel stopped when she reached Dipper but kept jogging in place. "Oh my gosh oh my gosh Dipper, wasn't that the greatest party we've ever been too!? And we totally kicked your buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu...". Mabel trailed off as she suddenly registered that there was a second Dipper right beside her Dipper.
'Here it comes', thought the Dippers as they braced themselves.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"
"And that's when we saw that Wendy and Robbie were hanging out, and we realized that, *sigh*, we blew it", finished Dipper.
"So, let me get this straight: I told you not to be stupid and, you decided to go and be stupid", Mabel said as she glared at Dipper with that scrunched up disapproving face she was known for.
"Y-yeah...but hey! You saw that I got to dance with Wendy in the end, so it all worked out!" Dipper quickly exclaimed, trying to cover up his mistakes. But Mabel, as the two Dippers expected, saw through it.
"Aaand how did you end up asking her?" Mabel said, leaning forward with a sly look on her face.
Dipper groaned and tilted his head down, repeating what Mabel had said at the beginning of the night, "By just talking to her like a normal person". He was kind of getting sick of saying this, but there wasn't really a more succinct way to put it.
Mabel smiled. "That's what I thought! Is it really a surprise that I was right in the end after all? Thinking less makes you happier!", she proclaimed, before looking at Tyrone and curling her lips in thought. "So uh, what are we gonna do about, *snigger* Tyrone?" Mabel was barely able to contain her laughter at the dumb name her brother always wanted. When they were just beginning grade school he'd often try and convince their parents to legally change his name to that but they shut him down every time, but not before making him do endless chores so that they would "consider it".
And rightfully so, as Mabel thought, because that name was really stupid.
"Well, I was kinda thinking that he stayed with us. I mean, think of all the things we could accomplish together, two Dippers!"
"Set the world record for most voice cracks and sweat in under a minute?" said Mabel, giggling.
"Solve mysteries! Tame the wild forests of Gravity Fall! Improve out talking-to-girls skills! The possibilities are endless Mabel!" explained an exasperated Dipper raising his arms up high, desperate to prove himself. He loosened up and glanced at Tyrone. 'She's never going to take us seriously, is she?'
'Nope', thought Tyrone in response.
"Chillax bro, I'm totally on board! I mean, this way I can have another brother to mess with, it'll be great!" said Mabel.
Tyrone groaned. 'Well, it's better than being melt-dead for all eternity. Heh, melt-dead, good one Tyrone'. He mentally high-fived himself.
"Speaking of, remember those new friends I made? Weeellll, we're going to have a sleepover right now! So get ready boys, because I really meant it when I said this party was going all night!" yelled Mabel as she snapped her fingers and Candy and Grenda bursted in cheering.
Dipper and Tyrone hopelessly looked at each other. Yet again, no words needed to be said, because it made perfect mathematical sense: more Dippers necessitated more Mabels. This was their life now.
THE END
...?
Author's Note:
You know, the episode's main moral of just being yourself and not overthinking when approaching people can also be applied to writing. Even if you think it won't turn out good, the only way to get anywhere is to just *do* it. I wish I knew that 7 years ago when I first made this account, I would have had the courage to write much sooner. But as it stands, this is my first fanfiction.
"Anyway allow me to explain the question mark at the end. This is meant to be an AU where Tyrone survives Double Dipper and so gets to tag along with Dipper and Mabel through the rest of the series, (or at least until he melts lol, but who knows if and when that would be). I intend to continue it, but I would love to also hear your guys' thoughts on the whole thing. Thanks for reading.