It was an oddly peaceful afternoon at the main HQ of the akatsuki.
Kisame drinking his precious sake on the couch, Sasori calling Deidara an unartistic suicidal maniac just right behind him, with Deidara responding with "Oh really? At least i don't like to fuck dolls like onoholes." He quoted. Now he's in the hospital, Kakuzu counting every single penny in the god damm world with a pissed off expression in the room beside the duo. Pein indulgeing himself with remnants of his past, Kohan reading some books from her's and pein's personal library right behind the latter, Zetzu watering his plants in the greenhouse, Orochimaru being overall creepy as fuck, and Hidan doing Jashin knows what right now.
It was a normal as it can get for the organization, no one away on a mission, no one killing anyone (as far as we know)
Just a day to relax, to put on some Netflix and chill, or maybe just sit down and comptemplate why they went down the path of a feared missing-nin in the first place? You know the usual.
With the seemingly endless downpour of Amegakure pounding the transparent exterior of the Zetzu's only sanctity nowadays. After he watered his less then pleasant looking plants, he took a sigh of relief and took one last look at his work before exiting the glass building into the rainfall of the village.
As he was walking on the concrete path he decided to try and talk to his other half to kill time.
"Would yo-
"No"
"At leas-
"Never in a million years you paste eating looking motherfucker,"
"Pl-
"No means fucking no you retard!"
but his efforts fell on deaf ears as he breathed a sigh of defeat. As he came around the bend to marvel at the lively local fish market.
Zetzu's face melted at the sight of it.
His nose taking in the vibrant scent of the market, he tasked himself to scowl the market to find something that would cater to his gluttonous desires.
Not even five minutes later he found his bargain.
"Ah, welcome sir, what would you like?" The old stand owner queried.
His face took a melancholy mask as he thought about it for a minute.'hey paste eater, 'what is it black im thinking.' 'I think you forgot something~" Zetzu resisted the urge to roll his eyes at his mind mate's commen. After a long five minutes of thinking he finalized his decision.
"Uh...I would like the...5 Saba fish please." He said while he motioned his hands to his pockets.
The shopkeeper nodded. "That's gonna be 500 ryo Son." The shop owner asked patiently.
"Oh...fuck." zetzu whispered under his breath, searching everywhere in his pockets for his wallet, but to no avail. The shop keeper frowned. "Lost your wallet?"
Zetzu smiled meekly. "Ha...uh...maybe I did." He stated before he turning his back halfway.
The shop owner made a sorrowful smile as he directed his jaded hands to the fish.
"It's on the house if you want?"
Even though the shopkeeper couldn't see his expression he could practically feel the shock emanating of his body.
"You don't have to do that oji-san, I can just leave." Zetzu said hesitantly. The old man rolled his eyes. "Nonsense! You seem like you're not putting on enough muscle there my boy." The old man said while pointing at Zetzu's malnourished looking arms.
Zetzu took a second to contemplate his next action. 'hey- 'don't even black' he could hear the annoyed scoff from a mile away in his mind.
"Okay then," Zetzu sighed. "But only because you insisted." The old man held both his hands up. "Guilty as charged."
Zetzu took the fish from the man's hands reluctantly.
As he went to put them in a plastic bag and say his goodbyes.
Zeztu didn't know why he was so timid and shocked that the shopkeeper gave him free food. He could've just as easily just had said a shallow thank you and goodbye and that would be it but nope.
But then again, it could been black living rent free in his brain again. Who knows. Who cares.
Free food is free food and that's that.
He knocked on the door gracelessly and was awarded with the reveal a certain blue swordman.
"Sup"
"Hello Kisame-san, how was your day,
"Well it wa-
"he looks kinda shit not gonna lie, "Oh shush your Bush black." "Hmph."
Kisame sweatdroped at the two's bickering as they continued arguing, wondering what could ever be in the bag behind their backs.
"What" They both said simultaneously.
"N-Nothing," he studered. "Just wondered what ya guys holding behind you is all."
"Well that's none of your goddam business-" "Oh that's just some fish I got from the market."
"Oh, for some reason I thought it was gonna be a human head or something." Kisame sighed with relief.
Zetzu laughed at his comrades worried relief. "Welp, we should really get going inside 'bout now. You know how pissed Konan-sama gets."
Kisame gulped
"So I'm just going to go out on a limb here and say you we're drinking all day in the kitchen, am I right Kisame?" Zetzu commented while Sitting on obsidian colored furniture with a mug look on his face.
Kisame grined sheepishly at his comrade. "Maybe just a little."
"A blind person could see that you cum stain, well now ya just hurt my feelings black." "you shut the fuck up-
Before black could utter a another syllable an expressionless face came into view.
"Zetzu-san, Kisame-san."
It was an oddly peaceful afternoon at the main HQ of the akatsuki.
Kisame drinking his precious sake on the couch, Sasori calling Deidara an unartistic suicidal maniac just right behind him, with Deidara responding with "At least i don't like to fuck dolls like onoholes." He quoted. Now he's in the hospital, Kakuzu counting every single penny in the god damm world with a pissed off expression in the room beside the duo. Pein indulgeing himself with remnants of his past, Kohan reading some books from her's and pein's personal library right behind the latter, Zetzu watering his plants in the greenhouse, Orochimaru being overall creepy as fuck, and Hidan doing Jashin knows what right now.
It was a normal as it can get for the organization, no one away on a mission, no one killing anyone (as far as we know)
Just a day to relax, to put on some Netflix and chill, or maybe just sit down and comptemplate why they went down the path of a feared missing-nin in the first place? You know the usual.
With the seemingly endless downpour of Amegakure pounding the transparent exterior of the Zetzu's only sanctity nowadays. After he watered his less then pleasant looking plants he took a sigh of relief and took one last look at his work before exiting the glass building into the rainfall of the village.
As he was walking on the concrete path he decided to try and talk to his other half to kill time.
"Would yo-
"No"
"At leas-
"Never in a million years you paste eating looking motherfucker."
"Pl-
"No means fucking no you dipshit!"
but his efforts fell on deaf ears as he breathed a sigh of defeat. As he came around the bend to marvel at the lively local fish market.
Zetzu's face melted at the sight of it.
His nose taking in the vibrant scent of the market, he tasked himself to scowl the market to find something that would cater to his gluttonous desires.
Not even five minutes later he found his bargain.
"Ah, welcome sir, what would you like?" The old stand owner queried.
His face took a melancholy mask as he thought about it for a minute.
'Hey dumbass, 'what is it black im thinking.' 'I think you forgot something.' Zetzu resisted the urge to roll his eyes at his mind mate's comment.
After a long five minutes of thinking he finalized his decision.
"Uh...I would like the...5 Saba fish please." He said while he motioned his hands to his pockets.
The shopkeeper nodded. "That's gonna be 500 ryo Son." The shop owner asked patiently.
"Oh...fuck." zetzu whispered under his breath, searching everywhere in his pockets for his wallet, but to no avail. The shop keeper frowned. "Lost your wallet?"
Zetzu smiled meekly. "Ha...uh...maybe I did." He stated before he turning his back halfway.
The shop owner made a sorrowful smile as he directed his jaded hands to the fish.
"It's on the house if you want?"
Even though the shopkeeper couldn't see his expression he could practically feel the shock emanating of his body.
"You don't have to do that oji-san, I can just leave." Zetzu said hesitantly. The old man rolled his eyes. "Nonsense! You seem like you're not putting on enough muscle there my boy." The old man said while pointing at Zetzu's malnourished looking arms.
Zetzu took a second to contemplate his next action. 'Hey- 'don't even black' he could hear the annoyed scoff from a mile away in his mind.
"Okay then," Zetzu sighed. "But only because you insisted." The old man held both his hands up. "Guilty as charged."
Zetzu took the fish from the man's hands reluctantly.
As he went to put them in a plastic bag and say his goodbyes.
Zeztu didn't know why he was so timid and shocked that the shopkeeper gave him free food. He could've just as easily just had said a shallow goodbye and that would be it but nope.
But then again, it could been black living rent free in his brain again. Who knows. who cares.
Free food is free food and that's that.
He knocked on the door gracelessly and was awarded with the reveal a certain blue swordman.
"Sup"
"Hello Kisame-san, how was your day,
"Well it wa-
"he looks kinda shit right now, "Oh shush your Bush black." "Hmph."
Kisame sweatdroped at the two's bickering as they continued arguing, wondering what could ever be in the bag behind their backs.
"What?" They both said simultaneously.
"N-Nothing," he studered. "Just wondered what ya guys holding behind you is all."
"Well that's none of your goddam bus- "Oh that's just some fish I got from the market."
"Oh, for some reason I thought it was gonna be a human head or something." Kisame sighed with relief.
Zetzu laughed at his comrades worried relief. "Welp, we should really get going inside 'bout now. You know how pissed Konan-sama gets."
Kisame gulped
"So I'm just going to go out on a limb here and say you we're drinking all day in the kitchen, am I right Kisame?" Zetzu commented while Sitting on obsidian colored furniture with a mug look on his face.
Kisame grined sheepishly at his comrade. "Maybe just a little."
"Of course your right dumbass what else could've it been? "Is your whole vocabulary filled with only vulgar words black?" "You shut the fuc-"
Before black could utter a another syllable an expressionless face came into view.
"Zetzu-san, Kisame-san."
"Oh Konan-sama! Sorry to disturb you're bookreading." Kisame greeted with toothy grin.
Konan just sighed and shaked her head at her subordinate. "It is quite alright Kisame you don't need to apologize to me, what you should apologize for is your alcoholic tendencies."
Konan scolding Kisame for drinking wasn't anything new to the man, in fact it's pretty much become a daily thing for the organization.
Kisame rolled his eyes. "Oh C'mon Konan-sama it's not like it's going to hurt anyone, right?"
Konan decided to ignore the swordman and focused on person beside him.
"I am sorry for the inconvenience Kisame-san might had caused you Zetzu-san, you may leave if you so well desire." Konan said.
Zetzu raised a reassuring hand. "Don't worry about it I'll be fine it's not like I'm going to die or anything, and besides, I was just about going to the kitchen."
"Then you may be dismissed but be at the meeting room in two hours, leader-sama will have a lot to discuss." Konan stated before returning to her personal chambers.
Zetzu bowed respectfully at his superior and left to find the kitchen.
He couldn't wait to find out what kinda bullshit they were plotling today.