This was why she had fought her feelings for Jack for so long. Why she had tried to hide away what remained of her heart. Because letting other people in, only ended up hurting you in the end. Did she regret loving Jack Sheridan? Of course not, and even if she did, it didn't change her feelings one bit. However, what she was feeling right now was something she vowed to herself when Mark had died, that she would never feel again. The pain in her chest was overwhelming, and once again, the man she loved might die and it was her fault again.
Mark had died, she had convinced herself, because she had to argue with him while he was driving. If she had just relented, even if for the time being, Mark might still be alive. Now Jack was fighting for his life, because she hadn't even attempted to try to stop him from going after Calvin. Granted, the man was a criminal and Jack blamed him for the tweaker who had broken into the clinic and attempted to attack her, but Jack knew the dangers of going after Calvin. He had told Mel about Calvin's warning that if Jack didn't leave well enough alone, that something could end up happening to Jack.
It had to be Calvin, or well, one of his men, that had shot Jack. No one else in town had a reason to try to kill him. Everyone in town loved Jack.
Mel sighed as she peered down at herself. She knew she should try to get up from the uncomfortable plastic chair and at least try to rinse off her hands. They were caked in sticky, drying blood… Jack's blood. As were her shirt and likely her pants, but she couldn't find the energy to force herself to stand up. Plus, getting up meant losing the comfort of the only other two people she cared deeply for in Virgin River. Hope is currently held tightly to Mel's left arm, tears making tracks down her cheeks, both providing Mel comfort and seeking out comfort from Mel. Vernon sat on Mel's right side, his arm draped over her shoulders in an attempt to comfort both Mel and Hope. Then there was Jack's best friend, Preacher, who was sitting directly in front of Mel. A mixture of emotions crossed his features, fear, sadness, and oddly enough what appeared to be guilt.
"He's going to be fine." Hope finally muttered, though it sounded like she was trying to convince herself just as much as she was Mel.
Mel couldn't find any words to reply back to Hope, she couldn't find the ability to do anything but stare at the wall behind Preacher's head. She knew that within a few hours the hospital would be full of other members of the town who wanted to be there for her and Jack, but at this moment she was glad it was just the four of them. Mel knew she couldn't take the entire town trying to comfort her at once. There was one person who was missing that Mel knew should be there, that would want to be there. Charmaine would be angry at Mel for not telling her about Jack sooner, and the woman had every right to be. However, Mel was trying to think about her and the baby's health. Charmaine had already had a difficult pregnancy, and she knew that Jack would want her to do whatever was possible to keep Charmaine as calm and stress free as she could. To Mel, this meant not calling her until they knew exactly what was going on with Jack, and how bad it might be. No use causing the woman undue stress if there was no need for it. Still, Mel knew that as soon as the rest of the town found out about what had happened to Jack, so would Charmaine.
"Jack Sheridan?"
The broken silence startled Mel momentarily, until she realized that it was a doctor that was calling out. Standing from the chair, her legs wobbly from not moving for hours, Mel felt Hope and Vernon stand with her, their hands clutching her own, despite the blood that was still caked there.
"Yes." Mel's voice cracked.
"I'm looking for Melinda Monroe?"
Mel nodded her head. "That's me."
The doctor eyed Hope and Vernon before continuing. "Mr. Sheridan was very lucky. The bullet barely missed his abdominal aorta, which would have likely resulted in Mr. Sheridan's death. That isn't to say that we didn't have to fight to save him, and we did nearly lose him on the table, but he pulled through the surgery. We were able to remove the bullet, which we have given to the sheriff. The cause of the bleeding was from Mr. Sheridan's spleen, which we unfortunately had to remove. The remaining damage was minimal, thankfully. Mr. Sheridan can live and function normally without his spleen, and I am hopeful that he will make a full recovery from this incident. That said, Mr. Sheridan has been moved to a room and is awake, which is all good news at this point. He is requesting to speak to you, Mrs. Monroe."
Mel sighed in relief. Everything that the doctor had said was fairly good news and pointed at Jack being able to recover from this whole situation. She felt safe enough to hope so at least. She still didn't trust her voice to talk just yet, so she nodded at the doctor who waved her forward. She followed him back behind the set of doors he had come through and onto an elevator. They were quiet the whole ride up to the third floor, and still didn't speak until the doctor came to a stop in front of a partially closed room door.
"As you probably know, Mrs. Monroe, Jack needs his rest. Please try to make this visit as short as possible. You will be able to return first thing in the morning if you so wish."
Mel nodded at the doctor, but knew that no matter what, she was not leaving Jack's room tonight. They would have to drag her out of his room, kicking and screaming. She eyed the ajar door and tried to ready herself for whatever might be awaiting her on the other side. She sighed heavily, even if she knew that he was fine, at least for right now, it didn't mean that she could handle seeing him after finding him on the floor of the bar...fearing that he might die before she got him to the hospital.
"Mel." His voice was dry and raspy. "I know you are out there, please come in."
Despite everything, Mel couldn't help the chuckle that slipped from her lips. She slipped past the door, before pulling it closed, and walking around the corner and into full view of the hospital room. Jack was still pale, though had much more color in his cheeks than when she had found him. The hospital issued blanket was pulled up to his shoulders, and Mel was thankful for that. She didn't think she could handle seeing his bandaged wound, at least not yet.
"I'm not going to break if you come closer." He whispered.
"Jack.." It was all she could get out before the dam fell. She had worked so hard to keep her composure this entire time, mainly because she knew that if she allowed herself to lose her composure, she might not ever regain it.
"Hey, I'm alright." He whispered, wanting nothing more than to climb from the stupid hospital bed so that he could wrap his arms around Mel.
"I thought I was going to lose you, Jack." She mumbled through sobs. "I don't think I could have lived through that...not again. Not after Mark."
"Come here." He patted a small empty spot on his bed.
She complied, and sat down heavily, her body jerking as sobs tore through her. "I-I…" No other words could fit through her mouth with the sobs that continued to wreak havoc on her body.
Jack hated himself and the situation at that moment. Now he knew why she had fought her feelings for him for so long. She was still in pain over losing Mark, blaming herself for his death and then this happened. When she looked at him, he could see it in her eyes. Mel had found a way to blame herself for this as well.
"This," he pointed at his stomach, "is not your fault. Don't you even try to put this on yourself. I went after Calvin, Mel, not you. You asked me to stop, and I didn't. I knew the danger behind it, and I didn't stop and I should have. I am so mad at myself right now. You finally allowed yourself to truly feel and I screwed it all up…"
Mel leaned forward, lying her head on his chest, trying to avoid hurting him. The sound of his beating heart seemed to help calm her down, as her sobs finally stopped. "I can't lose you, Jack. I can't. I love you too much and seeing you like that, Jack…"
"Only death could take me from you, Mel, and I swear to you from here on out to do whatever I can to avoid being taken from you. I love you so much, Mel and it is killing me to know that I am hurting you."
She looked up at Jack and sighed. She knew at that moment that she would eventually recover from losing Mark, even if she had thought she had gotten past his death already. They would make it past this horrible situation, so long as Jack kept his promise of trying to stay alive. She could be happy with loving Jack for the rest of her life, and she was glad that she had finally allowed herself to show her true feelings for the man before her. It would take some time and healing, but they would be fine.
With a small, sad smile, Mel leaned forward and pressed her lips against Jack's in a chaste kiss. "You are not allowed to die." She murmured before lying her head on his chest again, allowing his heartbeat to lull her into a safe calmness.