Austin

"Wow."

I glanced to my right at the sound of Ally's voice, her eyes wide and jaw slightly unhinged. She stood just close enough for our shoulders to brush, but far enough away for me to feel as if an ocean were between us.

"I know right," Trish claimed, rounding the front of the car and coming to throw an arm around her best friend's shoulders, shaking her slightly. "Wait until you see the inside, it's newly renovated. And, I'm giving you two the room that has beautiful french doors leading onto the patio deck." Trish suddenly squealed. "This is going to be the best two weeks ever."

With that, Trish walked giddily up the walkway and onto the porch, disappearing inside the house.

Ally shook her head in amusement before turning to look up at me, a soft smile on her face. And I hated it; it was one she reserved for strangers, one that I had seen a hundred times over the course of two years, and one I never assumed I would be on the other end of.

But nevertheless, I returned her smile, motioning my head in the direction of Trish.

"Go on in, I'll grab our things."

Her brows furrowed, only slightly, but her face still remained unreadable. "Are you sure," she asked carefully. And when I nodded, bending to kiss the top of her head softly, that seemed to be enough. With a nod of her own, she turned on her heel and walked away.

And because I was a glutton for punishment, I watched; that familiar longing and desperation churning low in my belly as I felt each step like a punch.

With a low curse, I turned, making my way towards the back of the car and reaching in the trunk to grab our remaining luggage. Each thrust of my arm was angry as I tried to not think of a time where Ally would have told me to leave it, dragging me inside with her to explore the grounds of Trish's parent's lake house the moment the vehicle stopped.

"Need some help?"

I shrugged at my best friend's question, closing the trunk and grabbing the two suitcases while Dez grabbed each of our backpacks. We each stopped at the beginning of the walkway, taking in the house while listening to the girl's giggles traveling through the opened door.

The house was beautiful; two stories with light wooden panels as the exterior with large, floor to ceiling windows making up most of the second story. It sat right on the most secluded corner of Lake Serenity that stretched for another two miles each way. The front porch posed four columns with two windows placed directly between along with a swing to the far left, something I knew Ally would love.

It was modern with rustic touches in all the right places, and for being in the middle of nowhere in Florida, it was a picture of perfection to get away.

"So." Dez rocked, gravel crunching beneath his shoes. "How's everything going with Ally?"

I closed my eyes, zoning in her own laughter that had grown in the passing minute. With a hard swallow, I leveled my gaze towards the lake, an orange hue from the sunset glistening across the clear water.

"I feel like I'm going to lose her," I admitted, my voice rougher than I had intended.

Dez placed a comforting hand on my shoulder, squeezing gently. "Don't think like that, man. Ally loves you, and she knows you love her. Just, be patient."

"It's been over a month," I claim, "and it just feels like it's getting worse. She barely looks at me, hell, I'm surprised she agreed to share a room with me much less come on this trip."

From the corner of my eye, I could see pity wash over Dez's face. But when I turned towards him, it was gone, replaced by a small smile. "Well, you have the next two weeks to be with her. No jobs, no school, no one sticking their nose in your business." He paused. "Expect Trish."

I chuckled lightly. If it had been five years ago, Dezmond Wade wouldn't have known what the word advice meant, much less being able to provide any. However, through the years, he had matured, and now, I clung to his word like a religiously deprived fool. Nodding my head, I savored the little hope I still had fluttering around in my chest.

"Come on," Dez said, clapping my shoulder and trudging towards the porch while I followed behind him.

Walking into the house, I could instantly feel Ally's mood change.

Before, she had been sitting on the sofa, laughing with Trish about God knows what, but now, as my eyes land on her, Ally's face has completely fallen. She wasn't frowning at me; that stopped two weeks ago. Now when she looks at me, its emotionless, dark orbs staring through me instead of at me with adoration I had always known.

"What's so funny," Dez asked, placing our backpacks down beside our luggage.

Trish waved off his question, standing and gesturing around the home dramatically.

"Okay, now that we are all here, I shall give you the grand tour."

Ally giggled at Trish's theatrics, and stood, coming around her to stand in front of Dez and I. She was so close, and all I wanted to do was reach forward, grasp her shoulders and pull her back into my chest. But I wasn't so sure that she wouldn't shrug me off.

"So, here we have the living room, complete with a brand new mounted flat screen and an electric fireplace." Trish's voice held a posh accent as she gestured towards the mantle, and Ally added 'oos and awes' for the effect, causing Trish to break character with a giggle.

"Then there is the kitchen, and there." Trish pointed towards a door at the bottom of the staircase. "Is an extra bathroom." Then we began past the stairs, down a little hallway that eventually led to sliding doors with a view of the patio and lake that was attached to the other end of the kitchen. "And you can go to the deck through here, or," she sang, dancing a little, and leading us towards another door to the left.

"You can go through these doors in your room," she claimed excitedly, pushing Ally through the door along with me right after.

I nearly tripped to keep from running into Ally, and we each turned to look at Trish. "That's the end of the tour, our room is on the second floor if you need us." Her face suddenly turned serious. "Don't need us."

And with that, Trish grabbed Dez's arm and began dragging him back the way we came.

I heard a little laugh and turned my head to see Ally smiling while shaking her head. "That girl," she said, slightly exasperated.

Nodding with a little chuckle of my own, I turned around, taking in the room. Crisp and clean with a hint of lemon, it reminded me of a hotel; a queen-sized bed made up of white bedding with pillows fluffed to perfection.

Ally walked towards an opened door, and I heard her gasp in delight. "It's a claw foot tub." And before I could ask her another question, she disappeared inside. Chuckling, I followed in behind her, keeping to myself as I watched her gush over the antique ceramic. "I can't wait to use this," she mumbled to herself, and I held back a smile. Along with the comment that I was afraid she might drown if she filled it over halfway.

"I'll go grab our things if you want to run yourself a bath," I offered quietly.

Ally turned quickly, as if she forgot I was there, and just stared at me for a moment. Her eyes danced back and forth between mine, and when I thought she was going to nod, her mouth popped open, like she wanted to say something. But frustration crossed her features, and her shoulders slumped as she looked at her feet.

"Hey," I whispered, taking a careful step forward, curling a finger under her chin. Bringing her brown eyes up to meet mine, I nearly crumbled when I saw heartache glistening behind unshed tears. And I almost wanted her to pull away from me, tell me to screw off, along with anything else that had transpired in the first two weeks of the hell I had created.

But instead, she allowed me to stand nearly chest to chest, cradling her chin, and I wanted so badly to lean down and take her lips between mine.

"Ally," I croaked, but shook my head, not trusting the words that would spill from my mouth.

She sniffled, pulling back from me and I clench my fist to keep from reaching for her.

"I think I'm gonna go take a walk instead," she muttered, sliding past me and out of the bathroom door. A few moments later, I heard the french doors in our bedroom open and close with a soft click.

Nearly an hour later, and well after dark, Ally reappeared on the deck before entering our room.

I frowned, pausing the television from my place on the bed, leaning up from against the headboard as I studied her.

"It got dark over half an hour ago. Where did you go," I asked, making sure to keep my voice light, curious.

"I walked around the property for a bit and then went to sit on the swing on the front porch." Her voice was soft as she began rummaging through her clothes with her back turned to me.

"I should've known that," I teased carefully, but when I didn't get a response from her, I sighed, running a hand over my face. "Als, can we please talk?"

This time, Ally let out a heavy sigh, turning around with a shirt in her hand that came down as she slapped her thigh. "Talk about what, Austin?" Her voice clipped and argumentative, and I knew I had to trail carefully.

Standing, I took a step towards her, running my fingers through my hair.

"I'm trying here, Ally." My tone was desperate, pleading. "I'm trying, and you keep pushing me away."

"Oh, like you pushed me away for months and then leaned on another woman."

My eyes snapped shut along with my lips as I pressed my tongue to the roof of my mouth, trying to push through the jolt of hurt that rattled throughout my core.

I had to remember that she was angry, that she was hurting, and she had every right to be. But we had been doing the same song and dance for a month now and all I wanted was for her to talk to me. We weren't making any progress, all we were doing was existing.

With another step, I held my hands out towards her, but I wasn't close enough to her in the slightest to touch. "I told you, I'm sorry," I exclaimed, trying to keep my voice low. "I'm so fucking sorry. I regret it every damn day, Ally, but I never touched her."

"You should have fucking touched her," she spat, and tears began spilling down her cheeks as she glared at me. "You could have fucked her and it would have hurt less than you running to her when it should have been me."

My head shot back, eyes wide, and a burning sensation began creeping up my throat.

"You left me in the dark for months," she sobbed, the finger she pointed at me, trembling. "I'm your girlfriend." She began to cry harder at that statement, clutching her chest on a gasp. "I'm the person you are supposed to run too when shit gets tough."

"I," I slumped in defeat, at a complete loss for words.

Ally took in a shuddering breath, turning away from me. "I think I'm just gonna sleep in another room tonight."

Panic jolted through me, and before she could open the door, I was behind her, my palm pressing against the door above her head. And we stood still for a moment, my chest against her back as she tried to control her breathing.

Slowly, I brought my free hand down to rest on her hip, turning her around to face me. Her eyes rested at my chest, strands of hair falling in her face, and I reached up, tucking them behind her ears before resting my hand on her cheek, tilting her head back until her eyes met mine.

"I love you." The words escaped with a broken whisper. "You are everything to me, Ally." A single tear escaped from the corner of my eye. "Please," I begged softly, "I want to fix this."

Her bottom lip trembled as her eyes followed the stray tear.

"I don't want to lose you." Slowly, I brought my forehead to rest against hers, highly aware this was the closest to her I had been in weeks. "I miss you." My nose grazed hers, and she inhaled sharply, causing me to halt every muscle. When she didn't pull away, I brought my other hand from the door, bringing it down to run up her neck to cup her other cheek.

Her breaths were short, uncontrolled as her body unknowingly reacted. With the slightest tilt of her chin, her lips lightly brushed mine, and I nearly sobbed at the contact, forcing myself to stay still - I needed her to kiss me.

She stilled, for just a moment, before she leaned forward a centimeter. And her lips met mine with a whimper. I sighed, pulling her face closer as my body leaned forward, trapping her against the door as she opened for me, allowing me to taste her after weeks of deprivation.

My lips moved against hers at an achingly slow pace, savoring every inch as my tongue swept across her bottom lip, coaxing her further. Her head tilted, and she moaned softly as I took control, deepening the kiss.

I poured every ounce of emotion into touching her, as if it alone would make her stay. As if I could make her understand just how much I loved her with a single brush of my lips against hers. Wanting her to feel the desperate urge of how badly I wanted her and only her, to fix what I had broken.

But before I knew it, she was pulling back, placing her hands flat against my chest as she fought to catch her breath. Her eyes casted down to the floor, and another wave of fear returned, mentally begging her to look at me. And when she did, I let out a sigh of relief at the sight of hope as she gazed up at me.

"Stay," I urged, "I just want to hold you."

And that was all I wanted.

There used to be a time when we couldn't be in the same room with one another without touching. And now, I couldn't remember the last time she had let me hold her hand, much less hold her.

She nodded, and I let out a relieved sigh, kissing her forehead.

I took a step back, and she looked up, giving me a one-sided, sad smile. "I'm gonna go run a bath." Her voice was low, a little lighter compared to moments ago. "I'll be out in a bit."

"Okay."

And when the bathroom door closed, I lowered to the edge of the bed, resting my elbows on my knees as I cradled my head. Relief swelled in my chest, and I clung to it, closing my eyes as I replayed the kiss.

A few moments went by, and before I knew it, the bathroom door was opening. I lifted my head, glancing to see Ally already dressed in a little silk nightgown with her brunette locks falling around her shoulders in tousled waves.

My eyes widened a bit, trying to comprehend just how long I had been sitting here. I stared at her, watching as she came to kneel in front of me, resting her hands on my knees.

"Let's get some sleep, yeah?"

I nodded at her admission, standing and walking towards my suitcase, removing my shirt and sweatpants. Turning, I saw Ally quickly avert her eyes, and I fought to contain my smile.

She had already slid under the covers, scrolling through her social media, but she turned it off as I lifted the covers for myself. She watched me, turning to place her cell on the nightstand before facing me again.

"Come here," I asked, and she almost seemed hesitant, only for a heartbeat.

Sliding towards me, Ally tentatively curled into my side. I wrapped an arm around her, hugging her close as my other hand moved to trace up and down the arm thrown across my abdomen.

She was still for a few moments, never fully relaxing until I saw her eyes flutter. And slowly, the tension in her shoulders resided and her hips sunk further into the mattress. Subtly, she nuzzled in the crook of my neck followed by a sleepy sigh, and a part of me wondered if the action had been intentional.

I looked down at her, playing with her hair; my fingers gently picking up wave after wave to comb through as I felt all the stress that had accumulated over the past few weeks disappear.

I would do anything in the world to keep her; strip myself bare and display every imperfection with a blinding hope that she would still have me.

Placing my lips against her forehead, I closed my eyes, and clutched her a little tighter. "I love you." And God, out of every lie in my life I had told, that would never be one of them.

Morning came far too quickly, and I was awoken by the sun shining through the glass doors. Groaning quietly, I shifted before realizing Ally was curled into my chest.

I stilled, watching her brows furrow as she muttered something, wiggling her head deeper into the pillow that we shared.

Ally remained in nearly the exact same position she had fallen asleep in. One arm was tucked beneath the pillow while the other rested between our chests, that being our bodies' only separation.

My arm was tossed over her midsection, my palm resting at the small of her back and I rubbed a little circle. I didn't want to get up; quite frankly, I would have been completely okay with spending the rest of the day laying here with her.

But my body itched in anticipation for my routinely run, and it didn't matter that I wanted to stay in bed, my body didn't.

I debated silently while staring down at the sleeping girl in my arms. On one hand, she knew that I was up with the sun each morning, and after last night, I knew she would want her space. But on the other hand, I wanted to take advantage of the moment for as long as I could, not knowing if she would allow this to happen again.

But with the thought of her needing space and my restless legs, I thumbed her cheek before carefully sliding out of bed.

Ally took in a deep breath and stretched before curling back into the pillow with a little hum in place of a snore.

Quickly but quietly, I dressed in running shorts and a tee before grabbing my belongings and heading out of the french doors and onto the patio, closing it as soundlessly as I could.

The sky was awakening with each inch of the rising sun, and I breathed deeply through my nose, finding that I enjoyed the scent of the lake mixed with early morning dew. And I wasn't sure if it was the new environment, the isolation, or the excitement for two weeks with Ally and our best friends, but there was extra pep in my step as I began scanning the property for a route.

Ally

Peace.

That was the first and only thing that came to mind as I extended my arm across the bed, feeling the soft sheets beneath my palm. The mattress cradling my weight perfectly as I stretched lazily before pulling the comforter up to my neck, an overwhelming sense of comfort captivating me.

Chirping birds and the soft buzzing of insects filled my ears, and I cracked open one eye, smiling at the sight of the lake through the opened french doors - reveling in the fact that if I listened close enough, I could hear the gentle laps of the waves against the stairs attached to the deck only a few feet away.

Glancing at the clock on the bedside table, it read a little after seven, and at the sight of the empty space beside me, I knew Austin was on his run.

A little smile crept over my face at the thought of last night, at how good it felt to be held by him all night. To exist together as we were before.

But it fell at the remembrance of another woman's hands on him.

Hurt formed in my chest before dripping down into my stomach, jolting my body awake before I had even moved. And it didn't matter how hard I tried; the image wouldn't relent as I fought to replace it with our kiss last night.

"He loves you," I whispered to myself, staring up at the ceiling, watching the fan go in continuous circles. "It's you."

I mentally repeated the words like a mantra, hoping that I would begin to believe them.

Closing my eyes, I felt a scorching tear escape the outer corner of my eye, running past my temple and traveling past my earlobe. I hated this, hated the fact that I loved him so damn much, but couldn't push past a mistake that he had clearly been beating himself up over. I hated myself for allowing it to deter me from helping him fix our relationship and damage every good memory I had with him.

But a second passed, and the hatred for me was replaced with an astonishing anger towards him. Something I thought should have already faded by now but was continuing to come and go at the most random of times.

I sighed, feeling like an emotional mess.

For the most part, all I felt was hurt and betrayed. But the anger and hatred still returned each time we made common ground - like last night for example.

With a groan, I pushed myself out of bed, no longer feeling the peace and comfort that I felt upon waking. Making my way to the bathroom, I did my normal morning routine before making my way towards the kitchen, planning to rummage through the cabinets to see what ingredients I could use for breakfast.

After a solid ten minutes of searching, I had come up with the ingredients for biscuits and white gravy.

"Morning."

I nearly jumped out of my skin, whirling around to find a sleepy Trish accompanied by a wide awake Dez.

"Morning," I replied to Trish, hiding my chuckle at her bed head. She scowled, and I knew I hadn't been very successful.

"Whatcha makin," Dez asked, plopping onto a bar stool across from me, and I shrugged, leaning my hip against the counter.

"Biscuits and gravy," I replied. "I don't know how good it will be. We are out of nearly everything, I was lucky to find those biscuits in the freezer along with a whole bag of flour, but that's all we have."

"Yeah, I planned for us to go grocery shopping around lunch, and we can grab a bite," Trish claimed, and then pointed at me. "But first, we are going for a swim and getting some sun."

I chuckled, nodding in agreement before turning back to the stove and stirring the gravy that had been shimmering. I didn't consider myself a good cook, but I did pride myself on being able to make a meal out of little to nothing. I suppose that was a perk of workaholic parents who were always too busy for family dinner; not that it was a bad thing.

"Something smells good."

My hand froze for only a second before continuing to stir the gravy, focusing on my breathing in order to steady my racing heart at the sound of his voice. And as much as I wanted to say it was from giddiness, like it used to be, the only thing I felt was nerves. Always on edge to prepare for a fight, all the while my body fought with my head, craving his presence just as much as I dreaded it.

I could feel his eyes on me from across the kitchen, and before I knew it, I heard his footsteps behind me. He bent to kiss the crown of my head, reaching up and grabbing a glass from a cupboard before stepping away from me.

Swallowing, I ignored the way my stomach flipped at the sweet gesture, finding myself wanting to be angry again.

He found comfort in her over you.

My lips pursed as that little voice in the back of my mind piped up, and I stirred a little harder than necessary causing some of the gray to spill from the side of the pan.

"How was your run," Dez asked.

Austin leaned against the counter beside me, sipping on some water.

"It was good, there was a little trail cut perfectly through the woods by the lake around back that made for a perfect loop. It's like four miles."

Dez hummed, "I'll have to check it out with you."

Austin nodded, setting his glass town, and I felt his gaze level on me. "How did you sleep," he asked softly, nudging my hip with his own, and at the thought of last night, I couldn't help the little smile that played on my lips.

Turning my head, my eyes met his, and we shared a look filled with unspoken words that only we knew. "I slept well," I admitted quietly, and I was sure a blush covered my cheeks. And we stood there a moment longer before I turned my gaze away, shaking my head and pouring the gravy over the biscuits.

Clearing my throat, I turned, placing the pan on the counter.

"Breakfast."

"How are things in paradise?"

Something between a laugh and a scoff escaped my throat as I settled into the lounge chair while watching Dez and Austin do flips off the side of the deck into the water. I took a large swig from the sweating beer bottle that I clutched in my left hand; it had been the one thing we did have in stock.

And although it hadn't exactly been my first choice, I was desperate for the alcohol to loosen my uptight tendencies.

"Honestly," I said with a sigh, sliding my sunglasses from the top of my head and over my eyes. "I couldn't tell you. It's still hell, and I don't even know what we are doing anymore."

I felt Trish's eyes on me, and I turned, settling my gaze on her. She studied me for a moment, a little look of pity forming on her face, and I scowled.

"Stop looking at me like that," I demanded, harsher than intended.

"I'm not looking at you in any way." She shrugged, "I'm admiring that bikini on you. Surprised to find that pink is most definitely your color."

Chuckling, I dropped my head to admire my own bathing suit, loving the way the dark, nearly hot pink, shade contrasted perfectly against my already tanning skin. Dainty strings were tied low around my waist, allowing me to show off the tiny outline of a butterfly tattoo on my right hip bone that Austin adored. I smiled, stroking it.

I felt confident in the little string bikini, something that didn't come often.

"Thanks," I smiled, "I really like it."

"I've noticed Austin likes it, too," she said nonchalantly. "But we both know I wasn't changing the subject."

With a roll of my eyes, I focused my gaze on the water again, watching Austin laugh as Dez extended too early and belly flopped. I shook my head a little. Sometimes, those two acted like teenagers instead of twenty-two-year-olds.

"There is nothing to tell."

"Okay, you can drop the tough girl shit. I know you. You are hurting and scared."

The knot in my stomach that I had been trying to get rid of all morning, tightened, and I wanted to cuss at her, tell her to mind her own business. But I knew she was right. It was getting exhausting pretending that this wasn't slowly eating me up inside.

Trish turned to face me, tucking her legs underneath her as she straightened, pushing her own sunglasses to the top of her curly head of hair. Her gaze was expectant, and I ground my teeth, hoping she would actually change the subject.

But that was only wishful thinking.

I sighed. "Things aren't any better than they were. I'm beginning to think." I paused, my throat beginning to ache at the words I couldn't form. "Things are never going to get better."

"You agreed to stay to try and fix it, right," she asked, already knowing the answer.

I nodded.

"Then Als," she said gently, "you know you have to actually help him fix it. I love you, but I can tell he is trying and you." She took a breath, grimacing a little. "You aren't."

I should have been furious. I should have told her to mind her own damn business and gotten up to go inside. But I couldn't because I knew she was right, which I confirmed with a cautious nod while watching Austin.

"I know. I know he is trying, and I know how much he loves me." My voice cracked. "And I want to forgive him," I said, a little more urgently, facing her. "Sometimes, I think I have, but," a single tear slid down my cheek. "Then I look at him, and it hits me all over again."

Trish reached over, squeezing my free hand while I took another drink from the bottle that was quickly losing its chill. Thankfully, I had downed half of it, and would hopefully start feeling the effects soon.

God now would be a great time to become an alcoholic.

"I know it hurts. I would have been devastated if this were Dez, but Als, he made a mistake. A stupid mistake, and he realizes that. At some point, you have to decide to forgive him and move on or let him go because you can't."

I sucked in a breath, her words hitting me like a freight train, and I didn't know how to process them. It had been a truth I hadn't thought of or had been ready to hear, but as her words began to settle in, I closed my eyes, picturing Austin as he pleaded with me last night to simply stay.

"Have you two even really talked about what happened?" she asked, "you know, since the night you found them?"

I pulled my fingers from hers, rubbing my temple as I shook my head. "No, we haven't really spoken much at all. This is the most we've seen each other."

"You two need to talk," she stated firmly. "Ignoring it is only going to make it worse, and frankly, watching you two avoid each other like the plague is nauseating."

"We aren't avoiding each other like the plague," I muttered bitterly, finishing off my drink as Trish scoffed.

"Yeah, right." She stood. "I'm gonna go grab another round."

As her footsteps faded, I let out a heavy sigh, leaning my head back against the chair and closing my eyes. My head raced at Trish's words, knowing she was right, and the state of Austin and I's relationship was just as much my fault now. I had agreed to stay, to hear him out, and try to make it work, which I had been doing the exact opposite of.

I felt someone sit near my feet, placing a gentle hand on my shin. "Want to come in the water?"

My head lifted, and my eyes fell on the blonde haired, hazel eyed boy I had fallen in love with nearly two years ago. He was everything I ever wanted, and I couldn't imagine a life without him. The muscle in my chest ached, and it hit me in that moment just how much I missed him, how much I missed us.

I had agreed to stay, I had agreed to try and fix us. I loved him, more than life, and the last thing I wanted was to lose him; no matter how angry or betrayed I felt.

"Hmm." I slid the sunglasses to the top of my head. "Only if you let me float around on your back." My grin was playful as I sat up, shifting my legs, feeling his calloused fingers graze my skin.

He held his hand out. "Anything you want."

The grin on my face widened, and I slipped my hand into his, feeling the same excitement pool in my belly that I had during the first days of us getting to know one another. But when I was on my feet, and his eyes turned mischievous, I knew I wasn't going to like his next move.

"But first," he said, moving quicker than lightning as he wound his arms around my waist.

I screamed, thrashing as he began running towards the edge of the deck. "Austin, don't!" I ordered, "I'll make you sleep out here tonight."

He halted right at the edge, and I let out a sigh of relief, trying not to think too much of my nearly naked body against his hard, wet chest.

"I'll take my chances," he whispered huskily into my ear before launching us into the lake.

Luckily, I was able to close my mouth and clasp my nose before I was submerged under water. A momentary panic filled my chest at how deep we had sunk, but Austin's arm remained securely around my waist as he pulled me with him towards the surface. I was a sputtering mess the moment oxygen refilled my lungs, and I was instantly swinging blindly.

"You ass!"

He caught my advances easily with bouts of laughter, and although I hated being thrown into any body of water, I couldn't contain the smile on my face. When my eyes landed on his, he was watching me intently, his thumbs rubbing my forearm. I shook my head with a halfhearted roll of my eyes.

"Jerk."

He winked, pulling me around him, and I happily slid my arms around his neck while my legs wound around his torso. His hand reached under water, cupping the side of my thigh while his other hand remained on my arm as he kicked effortlessly to keep us afloat.

Trish had joined us a moment after Austin had thrown us into the water, running and cannonballing. Only to resurface and begin bickering with Dez about the proper form of a cannonball.

I felt weightless, both mentally and physically as I laid my cheek on Austin's broad shoulder. Closing my eyes, I basked in the sunray's warmth on my shoulders, listening to my conversing friends as Austin rubbed soothing circles with his thumb on my arm.

For the first time in a month, I felt completely relaxed.

Opening my eyes, I watched Austin silently as he spoke with Trish and Dez, putting in his own input. I felt a surge of love grow mixed with hope, and I lifted my head, placing the softest kiss on his bare shoulder.

His head turned, looking at me as I readjusted my head with an expression I hadn't seen before; soft and grateful. He leaned forward, placing a kiss on my nose, causing me to scrunch it; it always tickled when he did that. A smile grew on his face before he turned back to Dez.

Glancing towards Trish, I caught sight of genuine relief crossing her features.

Closing my eyes once more, I let the sounds around me lull me into a state of relaxation.

I knew everything between Austin and I hadn't been resolved, but between last night and this moment, I think we knew that we were on the right track. I wasn't so sure that my anger wouldn't return, or that I would fall right back into trusting him completely. But Trish's words kept replaying in my head.

You have to decide to forgive him or let him go because you can't.

A single tear slid down my cheek, hitting the water lapping where my cheek connected with Austin's shoulder. I ached at the thought that Austin and I would never get back what we once had, but I knew that I could work with what I did have, him.

He found comfort in her over you.

I squeezed my eyes shut, desperately wanting to push that thought to the back of my mind. I couldn't keep thinking like that, I couldn't keep listening to that each time I allowed myself to get close to him again.

With a deep breath through my nose, I imagined all the stress leaving my body as I exhaled. And after a few moments, my brain eased, allowing me to slip back into relaxation a little longer.

"Do we have neighbors?"

The vibrations from Austin's chest and his question had me opening my eyes and lifting my gaze forward. Across the lake behind the forest line was the outline of a house, a little smaller than our own and almost completely hidden to the naked eye.

"Oh yeah," Trish said, finally letting Dez up for air as they wrestled. "It went up for sale after Mr. Johnson passed, I don't know who lives there now."

"I didn't know anyone else was out here," I piped in.

"It's only them. They built it nearly five years ago. I think Mr. Johnson may have left it to his grandkids. We never really see them though; they keep to themselves for the most part."

I hummed, laying my head back down, while scanning our surroundings as Austin waded us in circles. Giggling, I tightened my grip as he swam further out, trying to keep the panic from rising my throat. I wasn't the biggest fan of swimming, especially in a large body of water.

We floated in silence, enjoying each other's company for the first time in weeks.

But when my eyes fell on a silhouette near the edge of the lake in front of the neighboring home, I felt apprehensive. Whoever it was simply stared, never taking their eyes off the four of us as they stood in the tree line.

"Do you see that," I asked Austin, nodding subtly towards the strange figure.

The lake was rather wide, making it to where the other side could only be seen in broad daylight. With a nonexistent shoreline, the edge of the lake led into a steep hill until meeting the forest. And while I could barely make out whether it was male or female, or what they were wearing, I felt in my gut whoever it was could see us clearly.

Austin stilled for a second, his chin jutting forward as his eyes adjusted. And when his brows furrowed, the nerves in my belly only grew. His eyesight was a perfect twenty-twenty while mine had always been lacking, I wondered what he could see that I couldn't.

"What is it," I whispered.

Blinking, Austin turned his head, giving me a reassuring smile.

"It's nothing, I think they are just admiring the lake."

And while I believed him in the moment, the nerves in my belly intensified as Austin turned us around and began heading back towards the deck.

Soo, here's the first chapter!

Started off with a long chapter, and hopefully, that's how they will stay. I have no idea how many chapters this will be, or even where it will go. But I am enjoying writing it, and I'm so happy with it!

I'm so excited for this story, and I hope you guys enjoyed it. Leave a review and let me know what you think! There is more to come! And if you are a "Better To Have Loved" reader, I just updated that one, too! Go on over and check it out ;)

Thanks for reading, loves. Until next time.

-meg