"Hey, Slixe, you want to wait up?"
The Cathar spun on her heel, a smile spreading across her face as she walked backward through the oversized mineshaft turned hangar on Concordia. "Why must you always stop me when I'm getting ready to leave?"
Devick trotted up. The trademark lopsided grin consuming his tanned features. "Why must you always try to leave without letting me say goodbye? Besides. Someone has to wish you luck."
She brushed his cheek with the back of her knuckles. Grabbed him by the front of his blue and gold armor, pulling him behind her Kom'rk. Her ears flattened, and her smile quickly vanished. "I know. But this time...this time, it's insane. Your mother will literally kill you if she finds out you're here with me."
"Come now. We've both heard the rumors floating around. You and I, we're going to be the ones uniting our clans. And honestly, I have yet to find a reason why we shouldn't."
A heavy sigh escaped her. "Maybe that was our plan before. Look, things have changed. You know this. Everyone knows what I've done. I wouldn't be surprised if it's all over Manda'yaim (the planet of Mandalore) by now. Who knows what they're saying about me."
"Let them talk." He rubbed her cheek with a thumb. Found her line of sight. "Nothing has changed the way I feel about you."
Her eyes squeezed shut as she enjoyed his caress. "I don't think you understand how serious this is. I've changed everything. Honor and loyalty must come before all else. It doesn't matter which clan we're from. Buir and I are banished until I can hopefully complete this mission-"
"Your mission? Slixe, I overheard what your mission is for. I've also heard talks of the Cube. It doesn't exist. They're sending you on a fool's errand. They're purposefully setting you up for failure. You need to have a second option."
Slixe allowed a short laugh of exasperation. She moved away from him. "What do you think my second option is? There is no second option for me."
"Yes, there is." Devick's amber eyes softened. Catching up with her, he interlaced their fingers. "I am your second option."
"Don't tease me…"
"I'm not teasing you. Slixe, I swear my life to you. Haat, ijaa, haa'it. (Said when sealing a pact) We can move off-world. Set up a home anywhere in the galaxy. Your buir can come, too."
"All for what? So you can be cast out, same as us? Your position is too important. You're the successor for your clan. I've always been the one to make the bad decisions. I have to face the consequences. I'm not letting you waste your life on me."
"I have two brothers and three sisters. My family has plenty of heirs to find to replace me. However, I will never be able to find another Slixe Noce."
She slipped her hand free. Shook her head and backed a few paces. "I can't let you do this to yourself. Can't let you do this to your clan. If I have to, I will order you to stay away from me."
He caught her by the waist, holding her close and hovering his lips over hers. "It's a good thing I have a reputation for not following orders." He brought her up for a tender kiss.
Her eyes fluttered closed as she melted into him. Giving and taking with their kindled passion. She slid one hand up the side of his neck. The other found his hips, and she pushed him against the Kom'rk. Holding him in place. She paused for a moment, releasing a heavy breath. "Dev...you know they won't let us be together now."
"I don't care." He resumed kissing her. Tugged on her bottom lip before his lips found her forehead and he just held her close. His voice echoed his reassuring energy. "I have loved you since I first laid eyes on you. I thought you felt the same about me. Was I wrong?"
"No. No, I knew I was making you mine when I first saw you, too. But everything has changed-"
"Not everything. I'm telling you, Slixe. We haven't changed. Our love hasn't changed. Don't toss me aside. Don't toss our future aside."
She rested her head against his chest. Comforted by the rhythmic breathing she could feel through his armor, faint as it was. "I promise I'll succeed. You have my word as Mando'ade. Haat, ijaa, haa'it. I will succeed, and I will return with the Cube."
His grip on her tightened. "I don't doubt your abilities, and I know how stubborn you are when you put your mind to something, but I truly believe the Cube is a myth. I fear for you; your mission is a trap."
Characteristic defiance swirled in her feline eyes. "If it doesn't already exist, I'll make sure it does by the time I return. I'm sure there are tons of cubes across the galaxy. All I have to do is find one and display enough confidence to convince them. You just better be here by the time I get back."
A devious grin found him. "I'll do you one better. I'll make sure to be warm by the time you get back." He swept her to the side, leaning down for another kiss.
Snickering, Slixe met him halfway. Until her ears swiveled, and her eyes widened. She pushed herself off him. Straightened her armor. Straightened his armor. A professional tone surfaced. "Thank you, Devick, for your advice and well-wishes. The support of your clan is greatly appreciated."
Bronn strolled around the wing of the Kom'rk. His red and gray armor freshly devoid of a clan symbol. "Devick."
The younger male inclined his head. Flush creeping up his neck. "I was just-"
He held up a hand. "It matters not. I'm glad you could see my ad off. It's no secret you mean a lot to her."
Slixe's ears lowered sheepishly, and the tip of her tail twitched in her bodysuit.
Bronn placed his hands on his daughter's shoulders. "I know you will bring great honor to our name. You have succeeded before, and you will succeed again. Ret'urcye mhi." (Goodbye; literally: maybe we will meet again.)
She clasped his forearm. Gave a definite nod. After a quick embrace, she boarded her fighter and settled into the pilot's seat. Caught both of her men waving from the viewport. Their supportive faces the last thing she saw before she left.
Before she left.
The pain of her shattered knee had diminished into a dull ache. Only because she no longer focused on it. How could she? Too many things screamed at her for attention. Too many things clouded her mind.
Memories.
No. They were never memories. Only delusions her mind provided while she endured the duress of the Force placed upon her by her masters. Then why did they feel so real? She could speak the Mando'a language. Could remember the sound of her boots through the hangar. Could outline every panel of her Kom'rk fighter. Could find every scar Devick hid under his armor.
Devick….
Tears surfaced as she recalled their final farewell. As she lay on a cold floor and stared at nothing. The suffering of a forgotten love tormenting her heart. She truly loved him. Had always loved him since the moment they met as children, their respective clans allying themselves in the war. Her clan had warriors; Devick's clan had resources.
And they were to be the ones to officially unite their aliit (clan; identity) with their riduurok (love bond; marriage agreement).
No, that was blasphemy. Heresy. How dare she consider such a relationship when it didn't benefit the Temple. Love was an emotion. Emotions were not permitted in the Temple. Especially not for the Guard. Not for her.
Her eyes closed, and the bright white light consumed her mind once more. She couldn't help it. Didn't try stopping it. She long surrendered herself to the flashing echoes of her twin pasts.
"Do you know where you are?"
She inhaled a deep breath, the thick mask blocking her sight. Blocking all of her senses save for hearing the sound of her master's monotone voice. "No."
"What do you feel?"
"Nothing, Master."
"This is good. This is the way it's supposed to be. It seems you need to relearn what we've taught you. Do you know why I brought you here?"
She knew very well why she had been summoned. Knew very well why she wore the training mask.
"You have chosen to break our rules, yes?"
How could she lie? "Yes, Master."
The nameless voice never changed. The volume never raised or lowered. The tone never adopted an emotion. "Tell me what you have done."
"I have...I have given myself a name."
"We do not strive for identity. We seek uniformity. We seek only what helps us better serve the Temple, what better serves its needs. The Temple does not need us to be unique. Not only do we protect the Jedi present, we defend against the Sith past. Why would you choose to break our rules?"
"I do not know."
"How did you come by a name for yourself?"
She inhaled a deep breath. "It came to me during meditation. I had been reflecting on the Force. Reflecting on its ability to change shape, and the Force whispered the name to me. "
A long pause. "Is it then entirely possible the name is nothing more than an identity we may ask you to assume for a mission?"
"I," she selected her words carefully, "I do not think that is what the Force meant. It felt personal. As if it was something I was supposed to keep for myself-"
"Once you become a Guard, there is no turning back. We understand your case was abnormal. We never allow younglings into our ranks, but we have foreseen that your abilities will have their time in serving the Temple. You will forget the subject of names. Do I make myself clear?"
"Yes, Master."
"We will begin your training with pain drills. You will not flinch. You will not gasp. You will not audibly breathe. Why?"
"Because pain is an emotion, and we do not show emotion."
"Very good."
Her eyes remained closed, but she flinched at the afflictions she bore after that conversation. Even if she wasn't supposed to display emotion. She couldn't do anything about it. Exhaustion rendered her completely useless.
She had coursed through the various stages of trauma. Including the conclusion of her unbridled rage. Which resulted in hairline cracks spidering along the floor and walls around her. She experienced a deeply quiet depression. Spent many sorrowful hours staring at the ceiling of this room.
And now, she lay motionless on the floor. What was she to do? She could barely make sense of the visions she received every time she closed her eyes. She couldn't discern truth from lies. Couldn't determine her true history.
Did the past matter?
Perhaps.
Even through her doubts, she remained fairly certain Slixe Noce wasn't her name. At one point, maybe, but she couldn't shake the intuition it wasn't her true name. Wasn't the one her master punished her for.
The previous recollection...she had a name. Yes, one had been revealed to her. But she couldn't remember it. Why couldn't she remember it? If it revealed itself once before, it could very well do so again.
"It came to me during meditation. I had been reflecting on the Force. Reflecting on its ability to change shape, and the Force whispered the name to me."
Meditation? Very well. Pushing her torso off the floor, she stared at the pair of thick braids dangling with gravity. Her jaw set as her gaze wandered to her legs. One perfectly functional while the other had been shattered at its most pivotal joint. This would not stop her.
Pain was an emotion. And she did not show emotion.
She curled her good leg under her first. Grabbed the ankle of her bad leg and inhaled a calming breath. Pulled it under her with a resulting crack. Her lips thinned at the new explosion of throbbing. It fired in her brain, begging for attention. Begged for healing.
Eyes closing once more, she steadied her breathing. Elongated her breaths until she exhaled the pain aside. It would not be her focus. Not when she had more important things to discover. In the memory, she said she reflected on the Force. She would start there.
The Force.
However many hours ago, she accepted she knew the Force. She couldn't deny the energy surging from her. It had been with her since she was a child. Been her guide for as long as she could remember. The Force was how she found the Jedi Temple in Coruscant.
And that became her meditation.
She was small. She was alone. Even in the bustling city for a planet, she was alone. Left wandering the cold and noise-filled streets as she searched for food to survive. Yet, she had no fear. No fear of the endless droves of beings around her. No fear of death. Because she always had the Light.
The Force manifested itself to her as a glowing ball the size of her fist at the time. Or maybe, that was how her young brain interpreted it. It led her from place to place. Gave her locations of food and shelter. Told her when to hide. Because of the Force, she managed to stay away from kidnappers, authorities, orphanages. She may have been alone, but she also had the Force. And it was all she needed.
Until the fateful day it took her to the Temple. She followed it through the crowds. Ambled straight in through a side entrance. One that required the Force for entry. And it was there that she first experienced the Guard. A member found her and presented her before the Council for judgment.
The Council wasn't sure of her at first. Although they couldn't sense her within the energy of the universe, they determined she could wield it. They evaluated her for many hours. Eventually sending her to train with the younglings, where she could be tested and possibly assigned to a master.
She spent six days with the others of her age. Six days of learning and basic training. She made many friends, and in a fit of glee, she morphed into one of them. And was taken to the Council once more. They put her through several trials and tests. Determined the shape shifting came from the Force and wasn't a species trait. Even if they couldn't decide on her heritage and assumed she must be a mix resulting in a near-human species.
Then she spent her days in a room. No one visited her; the Force was her only company. She didn't know how many days she sat in there, for she had no way to tell the time. A master she had never seen before set her in front of the Council for a third time.
They admitted they feared the shape shifting and the inability to be sensed were gifts from the Dark Side. Though, they also admitted she showed no temperamental signs of becoming a Dark Side follower. Still, they argued over what to do with her. Until a member of the Guard stepped forward and claimed her for their cause.
The circle of Jedi masters reluctantly agreed after further debate. She assumed the member who initially found her in the Temple was the one who vouched for her, but she later realized she had no way of knowing.
The order of the Jedi Temple Guard accepted her into their ranks, and they immediately stripped her of the identity she never had. She endured years of rigorous training. Learned the tenants of the Guard and recited them in her sleep. She became everything they wanted, and she became their form of perfection. That was when they felt she could be assigned her first mission of artifact retrieval.
This was her story. This was her truth.
She possessed no ties to Mandalore other than the ones she fabricated for her mission. She also couldn't claim to be a Jedi. The Guard didn't consider themselves Jedi. At least, not in the political sense. Even if the Guard was made up of mostly former masters.
The Force was the only constant in her life. The only true remainder from her past. It guided her survival on the levels of Coruscant. Walked alongside her in the Temple. Comforted her when she struggled with her lack of self.
Everything she had become, she owed to the Force. Not the Council, not the Guard, not the fabricated Bronn Noce. She was a child of the Force alone. And it had given her a name.
Her coral eyes opened.
She was Zaliki.