Chapter 25: Free
A\N: This chapter was so difficult to write. Thank you so much for your nice reviews, I really appreciate you taking the time to write me! It really motivates me. This chapter will answer some questions, the rest comes in the next ones. I'd love to hear your thoughts. Hope to see you again next year! :)
Thank you so much for beta-reading, IcyQueenWriter. Your advice helps me so much. Check out her amazing SasuHina story "12 Years" on Ao3.
Damn it.
Sasuke lay on his bed, covering his mouth and nose with his arm. Hinata's scent lingered on the sheets. His eyes shifted to the closed door.
Telling Hinata to back away was more difficult than expected. Still, he couldn't allow that dream to come true. If everything remained the same, it would surely lead to that ending. Neji's letter would only remind her they teamed up against her and took away her freedom to decide for herself. Sasuke knew that feeling well enough. Hinata could hate him but bringing her cousin into the equation wouldn't help. Distance would. Staying together would hit harder.
Stinging pain in Sasuke's non-existent arm ended his musing.
Sasuke stood up, walked over to his bag, and started rummaging. For whatever reason, his phantom pain disappeared when he met Hinata. Cursing internally, he searched for the pills. As he reached further to search the bottom, he stopped when his fingers grazed over something slippery– a plastic bag. The sweets for Hinata her teammates had given him. He completely forgot.
Sasuke sighed, recalling her face when he told her to back off. Maybe it would cheer her up.
No, he should just leave her alone.
It was still hours before sunrise when Sasuke entered the lab some hours later. To his surprise, Hinata and Orochimaru were already there. She lay on the stretcher, receiving an infusion.
The snake bastard sat next to her, hissing something at her when he noticed Sasuke. "Good morning, my dear Sasuke."
Hinata turned her head to look at him and gave him a short, neutral nod.
Sasuke ground his teeth. Why was she alone with Orochimaru again? How long had she been there? "Where's Karin?"
"Umm, I let her sleep in. She seemed tired." Hinata's little smile didn't reach her eyes. Instead, they quickly shifted to the ceiling again.
Sasuke forced himself to regain control over the fury boiling inside him. How did Hinata walk across the hallway without him noticing? He stayed up all night but she slipped through. He was almost impressed but it also left a strange feeling of concern in his mouth. "Did you talk to your cousin?"
"Uh. Not yet." Hinata lifted her head and glanced at him. "Why?"
She doesn't know about the plan. Sasuke shrugged his shoulders, tearing his eyes from her. "Never mind."
She nodded slightly, turning her head away.
The silence that followed left an uncomfortable shiver on his skin. Would he have to witness another round of Orochimaru's "treatment?" He didn't want her to go through that pain again. "What's the plan?"
Orochimaru stopped writing on a scroll and showed his snaky smile. "Lady Hinata and I already spoke about it. Today will be different. Karin has a day off and won't be needed. I'm going to stabilize Lady Hinata's life force by giving her a variation of healing potions and chakra infusions."
Sasuke tilted his head. "No sealing today?"
"The seal from yesterday should have worked. It was perfectly fine. More time is needed to establish a variation that would work the same way."
Sasuke sat down at a table and picked up the scrolls Orochimaru left for him. Most of the time, all three stayed silent. Sometimes Orochimaru's questions and Hinata's answers broke the silence. No screaming today. Just silence.
From the corner of his eye, Sasuke watched her whenever possible. She seemed… normal. Her eyes were clear and determined as always, even if she seemed a bit paler. Unless it was unavoidable, she didn't look at him, but that wasn't surprising.
It was a rather uneventful day but in a good way because Hinata was healed instead of being tortured by Orochimaru's methods.
After several hours, Hinata and Sasuke walked to the kitchen to eat dinner with Team Taka. Hinata helped Karin and Juugo with cooking. The results of the treatment were already visible– a little more life illuminated her face. A quiet humming was audible as she prepared the meals, instructing Karin and Juugo in her own soft but authoritative way.
Sasuke sat down in front of Suigetsu and greeted him with a nod.
"Juugo and I, we're leaving for a mission later." Suigetsu grinned, his glance alternating between Karin and Hinata standing at the counter. "Will you manage without us?"
A grunt was Sasuke's answer. Of course, he would. "What's the mission?"
"Ah, the usual." Suigetsu leaned back and stroked the back of his neck. "Orochimaru needs some stuff for his research. Nothin' interesting."
At that very moment, Hinata and Karin started to set the table. With a content smile, Juugo brought over the food. After the three sat down, the group started eating their veggie rice.
"Woah! This is delicious!" Suigetsu exclaimed after the first bite. He turned to Hinata and grinned widely. "You should stay here forever!"
Forever. Sasuke scoffed inwardly. Over his dead body.
Hinata giggled with a sparkle in her eyes. "Umm. I-I don't think that will be possible."
"Shucks, such a pity!" Laughing brightly, Suigetsu gave her a meaningful wink. "Think about it again. We could become good friends."
For some reason, Hinata flinched at the last sentence, raising her hands into the air and waving frantically. "Uhh, thank you, b-but I don't think I –"
"Leave her alone, dumbass. She's not interested!" Karin shouted, showing him her clenched fist.
"Say what, Karin! Are you're jealous?" A loud laugh echoed in the kitchen, followed by the sound of punches and water splashing sounds.
Juugo sighed, focusing on his food. As Hinata observed Suigetsu and Karin's bickering, a soft smile settled on her lips.
Sasuke watched her for some seconds. That strange look in her eyes. His hand slowly reached out to hers, but then he pulled it back again. He had to keep his distance.
Some hours after dinner, Hinata and Karin left for their room. Sasuke walked over to his and left the door open. Nothing could slip through his watch this time.
Back in her mindscape again, Hinata walked over to Itachi at his usual fireplace. "Itachi."
He raised his head. This time, he didn't smile. There was something in his eyes again. That specific guilt she knew. "Hinata, please let me explain. Last night, I –"
"I know it about it." Hinata smiled at his serious face. "The dream Sasuke saw…You showed that to him."
His eyes widened slightly. "How did you know?"
"Well… We cannot dream after another consciousness enters our bodies. And Sasuke confirmed it when we talked about it. I knew that it had to be you."
Itachi shook his head. "Still, you don't know what I showed him. And you don't see the reason why. I didn't want you two to break up. That's why I didn't tell you first but tried to make him reconsider his plan. Your brother and my brother want to–"
"N-No. It doesn't matter." Hinata shook her head firmly, shutting her eyes. "It's alright. I think I found a way to solve this."
"How?" Itachi lifted his eyebrows and turned to her. That confused look on his usually stoic face almost made her chuckle.
"It does not concern you or Sasuke. It's not something he could do. So p-please, don't get in my way. You manipulated him even though you didn't want to do it ever again. I-I'm sure you wanted the best for him, but… let him be free."
Itachi nodded slightly, lowering his head.
"Itachi… You said that we only met because you wanted answers. But I think there was something else."
Once again, he lifted his glance. His lips parted a bit.
"I… I don't think you searched for answers. Maybe you were curious. But mostly, you were… lonely." She walked closer to him and their eyes locked. "Thank you. For everything. You were a great sensei and… a friend. Thank you for your help… and your support. Still, you can't continue to lead Sasuke without his knowledge. It's not right. Brothers should advise, not manipulate. "
"You are correct." Itachi lowered his eyes. His lip twitched and she thought he was going to say something.
Then she remembered her own time schedule. Somebody was waiting for her. "I have to go now. "
"Wait. I'm going to ask you again. What is your way, Hinata?" Itachi looked up at her and she gulped. There was something in his eyes. Concern or fear for his own objectives? She couldn't tell.
"My way is never giving up and to protect the people I cherish. Just like you do with your brother. I won't get in your way… but please stay out of mine."
He was about to say something, but she disappeared from the mindscape.
"Where's she?" A low growl woke up Karin after only some hours of sleep.
She blinked as a blur of red and violet flashed at her. "Mmm, Sasuke? What–"
"Where's Hinata?" he repeated.
"Eh, she's right he–" After sitting up and putting on her glasses, Karin looked around the room. Hinata wasn't sleeping on the floor. Strange. "Umm. Huh? She had been here. She's so quiet I almost don't notice –" She realized that Sasuke was already gone. Snuggling into her blanket again, she shrugged her shoulders and mumbled, "Drama, drama, drama."
The blood was pumping forcefully in his veins as Sasuke entered the lab. His Sharingan quickly scanned for Hinata but only found Orochimaru sitting on a chair in the corner. "Where is she?"
"Who?" Orochimaru lifted his head from his scroll and focused his golden eyes on Sasuke. The corner of his lip twitched slightly.
"You know who."
"Lady Hinata just left for a walk." Orochimaru cackled quietly. "It's quite a beautiful night from what I've heard."
Sasuke gritted his teeth. Something about the snake irritated him. The way he answered the question made him cautious. "She had been here?"
"Of course, dear Sasuke." Orochimaru shrugged his shoulders, lowering his eyes again. "You seem so stressed out lately. Perhaps a bit more sleep would help you with your… anxiety issues."
"I will deal with you later."
Orochimaru turned his attention to a scroll in his hand again. "I do not doubt that."
Sasuke left the room as fast as he came in.
Stepping outside the building, Sasuke looked around. A large cloud covered the moon but the bright, freshly fallen snow still enlightened the darkness of the night. For a second, he wished to have her annoying Byakugan, so it would be easier to find her. He ran around for two minutes until he saw her.
Right there in the snow, Hinata lay on her back, her eyes stuck to the sky. A small smile was on her lips that appeared almost bluish. The cold temperatures turned every exhale into a small cloud of evaporation. She sighed almost silently without looking at him. "Sasuke… Why are you following me?"
"Told you about my mission. What are you doing here?" Sasuke gritted his teeth. Why was she still up and alone? What the fuck was she doing lying in the snow? Her health wasn't in good condition anyway. He had to keep himself from picking her up and carrying her back into the warmth. "Hinata."
Hinata flinched. Maybe addressing her by her first name wasn't the best way to keep their distance.
"What were you doing?" He glared down at her.
"Mmm." Her eyes didn't shift to him. "Just watching the moon. It's… a red moon tonight."
Sasuke lifted his eyebrow and turned his eyes to the sky. At that moment, the large cloud disclosed the open view on a blood moon. "A lunar eclipse."
With a soft smile on her face, Hinata reached her hand out in front of her, as if she was trying to touch the moon. "It's very rare to see it so clearly. It's… a miracle that it's happening tonight."
Sasuke scoffed and crouched down next to her. "Hyuga…" The red color of the moon reflected in her light eyes. "Stand up and go back inside."
She hummed. "Just some more minutes."
"No."
"W-Why?" Disappointment flashed in her eyes.
Sasuke swallowed. A slight frown appeared on his face. That stubbornness. She couldn't continue lying here on the cold ground and get sick. All he wanted was to pick her up, peel those wet clothes off her body, lay her down on his bed and– "Stop arguing. Come."
Sasuke heard her sigh. But still, she sat up and stood up from the ground, leaving an imprint in the powdery snow.
Turning around, Sasuke started to walk back. She shuffled behind him. A red moon was indeed something he hadn't seen before. There were myths around that natural phenomenon. He shook his head slightly. Those sayings meant nothing, and he wasn't a particularly spiritual person to believe in them.
His eyes turned to look at the red moon one more time, and he stopped. It seemed that Hinata's eyes had also been stuck to the moon because she crashed into his back.
When he turned around to her, she swiftly took a step back, but they were still close. Their eyes locked for some seconds. Again, his body ached to embrace her right there. He urged himself to stop indulging in those fantasies.
"I have something in my room for you." He wanted to finally give her the bag of her teammates. Actually, he had decided to let it rest, but that certain look in her eyes made him reassess.
"Um… Okay?" A small blush rose was still on her cheeks, and she nodded. "What is it?"
"You'll see."
They continued walking to Orochimaru's base in silence.
"Okay, Akamaru. You know the drill." Kiba reached for his bag and pulled up the coat's zipper. The large ninja dog tilted his head.
They jumped out the window and made their way through the sleeping village. As they arrived at the gate, he could smell Shino right behind them. The familiar buzzing of bugs flying around him let his heart beat faster—some meters left to go.
Alright. Hold on, Hinata. We're coming for you.
With a tiny grin, Kiba got ready to jump but stopped when a group of Anbu operatives appeared in front of them, forming a circle around them. "Huh?"
One Anbu stepped up. Kiba glanced to his side to look at Shino, who remained silent.
Without any words, the Anbu pulled out a scroll and reached out to them.
"What the actual fu–" Kiba halted when Shino took the scroll, and the Anbu disappeared.
Kiba pressed his teeth together, shuddering internally. This could never be a coincidence. "What does it say?"
"The official mission to find Hinata," Shino replied. A bug ran across his forehead. "But we are requested to leave tomorrow."
"Tomorrow. Another day of waiting…" Kiba lowered his head, his hand petting Akamaru. "It's strange, isn't it? Did they know? How? Why now?"
Shino nodded slightly. "We were still being supervised."
"By the Anbu?" Kiba's eyes wandered around. "How would they know about our plans?"
He was met with silence as Shino seemed to process that question. "It appears that other powerful eyes besides Hanabi's might be watching us."
Hinata and Sasuke entered his room. He sat down on his bed, legs holding his bag while he rummaged.
"Sasuke."
The way she said his name made him freeze. By the sound of her voice, he felt that she was standing in front of him. His plan had been to cut their conversation to a minimum. He lowered his head to avoid her glance.
"Um… I just wanted to thank you. For everything you've done for me… and Neji."
Sasuke felt a sting in his stomach. If she only knew about their plan to get Neji out of her body. If she only knew. He grunted and lifted his eyes to see she leaned down to him.
Her eyes stuck on his lips. It was as if they were calling him. Almost subconsciously, he lifted his head, closing the distance between them. She peered at him with those large, beautiful eyes. Her soft lips calling for–
Stop.
Sasuke halted, trying to catch his breath. Not giving in to that longing was the only rational way. It would only lead to more pain for her. And for him in the long run.
His hand wandered to her shoulder. Push her away. Now.
But instead, Sasuke's hand pulled Hinata close to his chest. A hug was not the problem as long as he would push her away again. He felt her hands shaking, unsure as to whether press or drop them.
When she drew back, her eyes focused on his for some seconds. "Sasuke?" The tremble in her voice made it more difficult. No, worse. It was impossible.
Without any second thoughts, his lips found hers. Instantly, she kissed him back, deepening the kiss. His hand pulled her up on his lap, resulting in her straddling him. Her cold palm sneaked under his shirt, gentle fingers circling over his muscles.
What the fuck am I doing?
He had to stop.
He drew back from her lips languidly, feeling like it tore something apart inside of him. It was time to regain control. If he didn't, he would risk her life. Though, one part of him was asking for just. one. more. time.
"I thought we were…" He recalled her saying in his dream. As long as she wouldn't think that they were more, her hatred would stay in control. He had to push her away. Instead, he leaned down to her ear. "What are we, Hinata?"
"Comrades," she breathed against his neck. An instant prickle ran down his shoulder blades.
"Good." Sasuke's head told him to stop immediately, but his body didn't agree. He wanted to touch her one last time. To kiss her… Just one more time.
They locked eyes for some seconds. Stop now.
Hinata pulled up his shirt, and he didn't stop her. His hand opened the zipper on her sweatshirt, exposing her thin shirt underneath. She pressed her lips against his again, and he could go on like that forever. He felt her lips warming up with every kiss.
This wasn't planned. Sasuke knew they shouldn't. Still, he pulled her closer, pressing her against his chest. His fingers stroked her back under her shirt.
He relished every time her soft lips grazed his, knowing it would be the last time. Her delicate fingers traced over his skin. One hand rested on his stomach, the other on the back of his neck.
They kissed again.
When she bit his lower lip almost tenderly, he felt a strange feeling in his neck. His eyes snapped open, looking right into her activated Byakugan. Once again, she kissed him. This time, her second gentle fist poked right into his stomach, closing his Tenketsu.
"What–?" His body slumped down. Everything around him turned black gradually.
Stroking his cheek, Hinata watched him, tears filling her eyes.
"Hinata," Sasuke growled quietly, trying to sit up and fight against passing out. Though, he knew he couldn't do much. Why did she do it? A thousand thoughts flooded his mind.
He felt her laying him on the bed carefully. "I'm sorry, Sasuke. I didn't want that. B-But… don't worry, I'm going help you with completing your mission."
My mission?
"Thank you, Sasuke. For everything."
What…
Sasuke blinked one more time before he blacked out.
Hinata's heart punched hard against her ribcage. She looked at Sasuke, wiping the tears from her cheeks. Her other hand cupped his cheek.
"I… I'm very sorry," she whispered although she knew he couldn't hear her.
Then, she stood up and covered him with a blanket. Turning around, she threw him one last glance, trying to commit everything to her memory. At that moment, she envied Sasuke for his eyes.
Hinata stepped out of the room and walked across the hallway. Stopping in front of the door of Orochimaru's lab, she pressed her hands together and concentrated on her mind.
She trained hard to get this far.
~Hinata?~ Neji finally appeared in front of her. ~What time is it?~
Hinata didn't answer but gave him a small smile. A sense of proudness filled her chest. After all, she mastered another stage of controlling her mind. The training with Itachi helped her a lot.
Neji needed to be with her now. She looked at him standing right next to her. "Neji."
–What is it, Hinata? What are you doing here?~
She didn't answer, looking lost in thoughts. He thought to see a tear in her eye, but it disappeared before he could blink again.
After several seconds of strangely uncomfortable silence, Neji cleared his throat. His eyes rested on his cousin in the dark hallway. Why was she here? But first, he had to talk to her. There were some other questions he had. After his conversation with Sasuke, he thought a lot about certain things while he wasn't with Hinata. ~I think I understand it now.~
"Huh?" Hinata looked at him with wide eyes. "What exactly?"
~'Little Neji.'~
A small smile appeared on Hinata's lips. "Really?"
~That 'little Neji' is… no, was a part of you. When everybody else was ready to kill you in your own mind, he was the only one to stand up for you. I realized that he must have been the part of you loving yourself without constraints. He wanted you to let me go, and since he already resembled me, I assume it made sense to haunt you into despising me.~
Hinata fidgeted a bit. "Neji…"
~Perhaps he thought that if you hate me enough, eventually you'd let me go.~ Neji sighed, his eyes wandering around. It took him some time, but speaking to Juugo helped him figure out Hinata's inner world. To understand her subconscious, which for some strange reason resembled him. ~That 'little Neji' wanted you to hate him so that you would hate both of us. He wasn't afraid to be hated by you as long as you would stay alive.~
Hinata lowered her eyes.
Neji blinked. Why didn't she seem surprised at all? And why didn't she tell him if she knew?
"I know."
~You do?~
"I suspected it, and Juugo confirmed it." She tilted her head, pursing her lips. "Little Neji thought that if he'd try hard enough, I'd hate you. But I can never hate you. You're my brother, and I couldn't hate him either."
Neji's eyebrows tightened together. ~That part of you wanted me gone. Still, he was ready to die for you anytime.~
Hinata's lips twitched. "Maybe that's why he resembled you."
~I see.~ Neji nodded slowly. ~But somehow, this worries me. Why did he attack you?~
"Mmm…" Hinata lowered her eyes. "Do you remember when I stood by the abyss?"
~Of course. Why?~
"I don't think it was little Neji who wanted me to jump. I think it was me… u-unconsciously battling him. It might have been me trying to… fight him."
~Fight him?~ Neji's eyes widened. That didn't sound good at all. So it was her… hurting herself? It was her choking herself and her pulling herself into the water? No. No way. Unless... But why? To fight for dominance over her subconscious? And how long did she know it? ~Hinata, please listen to me. I'm not sure what you try to say, but you have to accept that I am gone.~
"No. You… You're not," Hinata whispered as she placed her hands on the door in front of her.
Neji looked around, feeling an uncomfortable tingling behind his eyes. A strange instinct told him something wasn't right.
Where is she going so late at night?
~I am dead,~ Neji growled, trying to establish eye contact with her. ~Look. I talked to Uchiha and I have an idea to solve this. We decided on– What–?~ He stopped talking as Hinata opened the large door in front of her and walked into the familiar lab. Dimmed light from the shimmering tanks and monitors enlightened Orochimaru's slender and somber silhouette at his desk.
"There you are, Lady Hinata," Orochimaru hissed softly, turning to her. "I thought you wouldn't come."
A watery smile flashed on Hinata's face. She sat on that chair he pointed at. "I-I'm sorry I'm late."
"No problem at all, Lady Hinata." Orochimaru nodded slightly.
Neji swallowed. What the fuck is she doing here? Alone. At night.
Nothing good. Neji raised his eyebrows. ~What is going on? Why are you meeting him outside the usual times? Why isn't the Uchiha with you?~
Orochimaru's hand waved at a desk next to where he was standing. "Well, shall we? First, we have to get past some formalities. As you know, I'm currently under supervision. However, a standard contract will solve that issue easily."
"S-Sure." With steady steps, Hinata made her way past Neji to Orochimaru's desk. Neji followed her right behind her. Her eyes scanned the content of the scroll in front of her.
~What's this?~ Neji stared at the scroll. ~A contract against liabilities?~
"For the case, the Hyuga clan attempts to trial me for your decisions," Orochimaru explained in a calm tone. "If you have any questions, I can provide you with more details on it."
"No, I-I understand." After quickly reading through the scroll, Hinata nodded at him. She bit into her finger and pressed her bloody thumb on the paper. "I consent, Lord Orochimaru."
"Splendid. I prepared everything. You will need to sit down over there." His thin arm darted out, pointing on the ground in the dark empty corner in the back of the room.
~Sit there? For what?~ Neji felt a shudder building up inside of him.
Hinata said nothing, tiptoeing to the place. A dark seal was drawn on the ground. She sat down in the middle of the circle. Then, she breathed in and out deeply. Her head turned to Orochimaru, who cocked his head.
What is this seal? Neji didn't know anything that resembled this mark on the ground.
"Lord Orochimaru. Can I have some minutes? I n-need… t-to…" Her shaky voice made Neji's heart clench for some seconds.
He sat down next to her. ~Hinata, talk to me. What is all this? Why are you so upset?~
"Of course, Lady Hinata. Take all the time you need." Orochimaru cackled quietly.
"Right. Umm. Neji…" Hinata smiled a bit and her eyes focused on Neji, who leaned down to her. A strange premonition started to drip into his core. "I decided to let go."
Neji's eyes widened. Let go?
"I know you're suffering. You deserve to be able to have an effect on this world." She closed her eyes. "And… I wish we could live side by side. But we can't."
Neji nodded slightly as a small smirk appeared on his face, his head lowering. It felt like a weight lifted from his shoulders. His breathing calmed down. Finally, she had accepted that she had to let him go. This would all end now. Finally, she had admitted that she had to let go. ~No. Unfortunately, we can't.~
"I tried so hard to find a solution."
~I know.~
"I wanted to make it all right again."
~It's okay, Hinata. It's alright.~ Neji placed his hand on her shoulder. His lips turned into a tiny smile. ~You did your best.~
She lowered her eyes and sniffed. "I'm s-so sorry, Neji. I always wanted to do something with a meaning. But I couldn't live up to my goals. I couldn't protect Naruto. I couldn't protect you."
~You can do anything you want, Hinata. It's all in your hand. You could change the Hyuga clan or –"
"Um. I don't think I can do that."
~Hinata…~
"But I'm very confident you can. " Neji's head snapped to look at her. "S-So… With the help of Lord Orochimaru, I found a way to bring you back."
Neji widened. ~What?~
With a watery smile on her lips, she nodded firmly. "Lord Orochimaru came up with a way to alter the Edo Tensei to give you back your body."
~Edo Tensei? How?~
"Exactly, Lady Hinata." Orochimaru took out another scroll. "The original Edo Tensei can be easily modified by altering the formula. The components are already in this world. The soul of your cousin is here. This makes the jutsu easier."
Neji's eyes stuck on Orochimaru walking over with the scroll right towards Hinata. ~I don't think I understand.~
"W-We will bring you back, Neji." Hinata bit on her lip, focusing her glance on the floor.
Neji narrowed his eyes. ~Bring me back? How?~
Orochimaru cleared his throat. He placed the scroll in the front of the drawn seal on the floor. "The modified Edo Tensei still needs the same components as the original. The DNA won't be necessary since your soul is trapped inside Lady Hinata what must mean that there is a trace of it included. I assume it might be the blood. Still, one component is…"
Orochimaru stopped and turned to Hinata, who folded her hands in front of her face. Almost like hiding.
Neji shuddered. What… ~What does that mean?~
"The only way for it to work is," Hinata smiled a tiny smile, but her eyes shook, "that my body will transform into yours. And my soul will serve as the sacrifice."
Her words repeated herself on a loop in Neji's mind. He must have misheard. His eyes widened in horror. ~What the fuck?~
No!
Neji turned around, and his eyes stuck on the scroll lying on the floor in front of Hinata. Orochimaru sat down on a chair in another corner of the room, his foot slightly bouncing up and down. Those golden eyes glimmered as they closed in on Hinata.
~You can't be serious.~ Neji repeated in a louder voice. ~Stop this immediately!~
Hinata's lip quivered for some seconds. "Ah, Neji."
~Stand up and go back to your room, Hinata. Tomorrow, Orochimaru can try another seal–~
"It won't work."
~What?~
"My body is not compatible. I-It won't work. This is my only chance to bring you back."
~Stop it! No!~ Neji shouted. His mind felt like it would go black. He had to convince her to stop with whatever insanity she had come up with. His face was covered by a deep frown. He placed both hands on her shoulders and looked her in the eyes. ~You won't do that.~
Withstanding his glance, Hinata reached out her hand as if she could actually touch his shoulder. "You can go back to Konoha. Change our clan. Become who you were always meant to be. No caged bird seal will restrain your freedom any longer. This whole situation… It all happened for a reason. You dying that day was wrong. It should have been me the whole time."
Neji shook his head firmly. ~Hinata. That's not true.~
"You're my family. I promised myself to never let you die again. This is my only chance. A change to make it all right."
~Stop!~ No. No. No!
Another smile flickered on Hinata's face, turning into a determined expression.
No!
Worse, it was turning into that stubbornness Neji knew and feared. Fuck.
She sighed. "I… I really wished we both could… make it. I wished we could live side by side. But there is no chance for that and if that means to make a sacrifice, I'm ready to make it."
~That's insane,~ Neji growled, his hands squeezing her shoulders now. ~Stop right now! I command you to stop.~
"I always wanted to be as strong as you, my big brother."
~Don't. Don't let that inferiority complex doubt your abilities, Hinata.~ Neji tried to regain control over himself to find a solution. His thoughts shifted to Naruto and how he had managed to convince Hinata to never give up. But it had almost led to her death multiple times. And now, that well-meant thought turned into a monstrous idea. She wasn't able to give up at all– even with her own life on the line.
Neji clenched his jaw. He had to solve this rationally. ~You're underestimating yourself. I saw you on the battlefield. You are strong.~
"I failed too many times before..." Her eyes shifted to the side before they rose and focused on him. Her eyebrows drew together. "But not this time."
~I will not allow this! You can't do that.~
"I'm s-sorry, Neji. But it's my choice. My free will. There is no way to stop this, so I really hope, we could just be together… just for a little while before I… Come," she patted her hand on the place next to her, "sit with me one last time."
Fuck.
~Please no,~ Neji murmured, desperately looking around. ~Hinata. Please, stand up and stop this madness. I don't want this! I want you to live! It's my wish that you carry on. We have to get me out of you. You can live your life without me. There is a possibility. Uchiha and I thought about –~
"Neji," Hinata interrupted him with a shake of her head, "outside these walls, there's nothing left for me. I disgraced our clan. I cut all my bonds. There's nobody waiting for me anyway." For some seconds, Hinata's smile disappeared as she nibbled on her lower lip. Tears shimmered in her eyes. "But people are waiting for you, Neji. Your friends, our clan, and Hanabi. You will continue. You're strong, I-I know that."
The horror of the situation settled in his mind. He couldn't let this happen. ~No. Hinata, listen to me.~
Hinata smiled a watery smile. "I'm giving you back a chance in life. My life. This was my destiny all along."
~Stop this, Hinata! This is fucking insane!~ Neji shouted, growing more desperate with each second. His hands on her shoulders tried to shake her, but she blocked his touch in an instant. ~What about the Uchiha? He wouldn't–~
"Sasuke," Hinata whispered in a soft tone, "I-I said goodbye. His reputation will be restored when he brings back a Hyuga. You will be that Hyuga."
~What the fuck? Does he know about this?!~
Hinata slowly shook her head. "We don't have much time left, Neji. Mmmm… D-Do you remember that time when I overstrained my eyes, and you tried to help me? You wanted me to see the fireworks. I wished we could have–"
~No! Don't do that! Stop right now! ~ He felt his heart bursting. ~I don't want this! I never asked for–~
"I know… But you should be free. This time, you won't be a caged bird. You will be free and alive."
~I want you to live!~
"It's okay. D-Don't worry about me. It's… I'm so tired," she breathed in and out deeply, her lips trembling, "so tired of looking at the ghost of me. I've been invisible for most of my life."
~That's not true.~ No. Please. There had to be a way to stop her from doing that. She couldn't do that. Neji thought of that 'little Neji', Hinata's ability to love herself. It died and now… Neji knitted his eyebrows. ~ You're not invisible!~
"You were one of the few people seeing me. And after cutting all my bonds, I've become a ghost. Now I can finally have an effect on something. I can choose my own way. This is my way."
~You're not a ghost! You're alive and important! I witnessed your potential. You're not invisible!~
A quiet giggle escaped her. "Not to your ever-seeing eyes. And I'm very grateful for you seeing me. You watched over me. But I promised to protect you too."
An ice-cold shiver settled permanently on Neji's soul. A horrible realization hit him.
This is not a negotiation. This is her saying goodbye.
He stood up and ran around in the room, desperately looking for something. Tanks, scrolls, scalpels, monitors, medicine, books, Orochimaru. Neji couldn't move anything. He wasn't physical. Only a spectator. Anything. He didn't know what. Racking his brain for solutions, he had to stop this insanity. His eyes snapped back to Hinata again. ~Hinata, please stop this.~
"You can do it, Neji. I know you won't fail because you never give up." It was almost like she couldn't hear him anymore. She was too deep in this idea. Too determined. Neji felt like suffocating while she continued her musings. "Become Hyuga clan head. I'm sure Father will accept it. He changed after the war… he became… softer. End the slavery of the branch family in our clan. Lead our clan into a brighter future."
~No!~ This couldn't be real. Neji still ran around in the room. But he was the ghost– a consciousness without a real body. He couldn't touch anything. His head turned to Hinata again.
She closed her eyes, and a smile appeared on her face. "A warmer future. A clan to be proud of. I… I know you can do it. You are strong and capable. Hanabi will be so happy to have you back. Go to Tenten and give her a kiss from me..." She chuckled.
~Hinata.~ Neji's shaky whisper was almost inaudible. ~Don't do it. I'm begging you.~
"Take care of Hanabi, say hello to Shino and Kiba… and try to b-be a friend to Sasuke. You two are very much alike." Hinata wiped away her tears with the back of her hand. "Or... Or do none of these things. Live your life the way you want to. You won't be caged anymore. I want you to be free."
Neij's face scrunched up. That had to be an awful genjutsu.
A cursed nightmare.
He couldn't possibly witness something like that. So this was how dying without a body was like. Her words crippled his soul. Completely helpless.
No chance to do anything against… destiny? No. This can never be our destiny!
His eyes focused on Hinata looking up at him. ~Don't!~
After she nodded her head towards Orochimaru, he started walking to the scroll in front of her. He kneeled down next to the scroll. "Everything is ready, Lady Hinata."
Then, Hinata looked into Neji's eyes. "And when you think of me... when you think of your little sister, don't forget one thing. No matter what happens, Neji, I will– "
No.
There was a smile on her face, soft and content.
Neji's eyes dilated as he shook his head. No. No way.
"– I will always love you."