11 Revenge

"I'm gonna follow him" Walter said, kicking up the jeep door, "You head to the north side and head him off!"

Taylor nodded and he quickly jogged around the vehicle so she could rush after the motorcyclist that had disappeared into the warehouse. He didn't know if Cabe, Happy or Toby had caught the other motorcyclists, but after what they had done to Sylvester, Walter sure as hell wasn't letting this one get away.

"Hey!" He yelled, rushing after the biker, "Hey!"

The man didn't slow down, instead continuing to run through the warehouse, knocking over everything he could to stop him catching him. Walter jumped over an old gas canister and raced past the Interpol agent's silver jeep pulling up outside. Rushing across the empty room, he paused as he saw the helmet abandoned on the floor.

The man had gone up, then, instead of out.

Walter grabbed the stairs railing and leapt up them two at a time. It made no sense for the perp to go to the roof, but considering he was being chased by Interpol, Homeland, and a very persistent tech guy, he guessed that 'logic' wasn't at the forefront of his mind right now.

He burst out onto the roof and quickly looked around, even as he heard sirens and the screeching of tires far below. The man had swung a lef over the side of the building and was about to climb down the metal ladder, but from here, Walter could tell that the warped and rusted old metal wasn't going to hold his weight.

He reached the side of the roof just as the ladder collapsed.

The man managed to swing one hand up on the edge of the roof, desperately trying to grip onto it with leather gloves as the ladder smashed into the ground five stories below.

"Help me!" He begged, "Please, pull me up!"

Far down the street, Walter saw Cabe and Paige get out of the jeep as the sounds of sirens became louder and louder.

"Help me!"

The man was barely clinging to the rooftop, barely clinging to life just like Sly was barely clinging to life. What right did he have to live when Sly might not? He'd poisoned his best friend, his- his little brother and- and now he was asking Walter to help him? After what he'd done? After what he was going to do?!

"Help me!"

… But could Walter really play the role of judge, jury and executioner?

"Help me!"

Mind made up, he reached forward and tried to grab hold of the man's hand. But the leather gloves were too thick to grab onto, and the weight of his clothes and backpack was dragging him down and just as Walter tried to grip his wrist and-

And the man fell.

Walter listened to his scream, watched as he plummeted off a five-story building, saw his head split open on impact with the car below.

He was vaguely aware of Agent Taylor finally reaching him.

The car was crushed under the weight of a falling body.

He had just killed a man.

Toby and Happy appeared at Cabe's side, the doctor running forward to see if there was anything he could do.

He had killed a man.

"What the hell happened?!" Taylor exclaimed.

Walter killed a man.

He isn't sure how he gets back downstairs, or where the time disappeared to, because when he next blinks, it's somehow night time and the crime scene- his crime scene -is lit up by flashing police cars and the lights of LA. In the background he can hear indistinct radio chatter as well as the low murmurs of the crime scene investigators around him.

He paced back and forth, hands in his pockets and the dead man's scream still ringing in his ears.

After a while, he's aware of Taylor stopping in front of him, and he half-turns to her as she speaks.

"You all right?"

"... Yea" He replied, "Yea, I made a… made a move to save him, and I couldn't".

Because he had. He had tried. He had tried to save him, it was just-

"Right".

-just a little too late.

The Interpol agent briefly put her hand on his arm, gave him a small smile, and then walked away.

Walter was acutely aware of Cabe and Paige standing a few feet away, both staring at him with blatant worry in their eyes, and he quickly started pacing again so he wouldn't see it.

"Pushed him hard today" Gabe said quietly, quiet enough so he likely thought Walter couldn't hear him, but unfortunately, he still could.

"We were all trying to do the right thing" Paige replied diplomatically.

"Case like this… if you don't close it, it becomes a sore. Won't heal".

He looked away so the man wouldn't see his reaction to those words, and clenched his hand into fists to try and stop them from trembling.

"I didn't want him to have that".

Too little too late.

"What happened on the roof…"

Cabe had made his way over to him, and Walter reluctantly turned back. There was worry in his eyes, and regret too, and for all his failings, the agent didn't deserve that. Didn't deserve more pain and anguish just because of Walter.

So he forced himself to stop pacing, made himself face the man, and tried to put some level of evenness in his voice.

"I don't feel bad about what happened".

Neither Paige nor Cabe look very believing.

"You know me" He pressed, "I don't... I don't have those kind of feelings".

Cabe just continued to stare. Although his face was emotionless, his eyes were anything but, and Walter hated it, hated the fact he'd made the man worry about him, hated the fact that all it took was one look from the man for him to want nothing more but to collapse in his arms. But a breakdown was out of the question. He could have one, later on, when there was nobody to witness it, but right now, Cabe had better things to be doing than consoling a murderer.

"I got to go see Sylvester".

He turned and left the crime scene, hands still in his pockets to hide their shaking, unsure where he was going and even more unsure of where he was.

A few seconds later, Paige fell into step beside him.

"You okay?"

"Fine".

"You sure?"

"Yep".

"... Walter, what happened today would shake up anyone, let alone-"

"I said I'm fine".

He could feel her eyes burning into the side of his face but he firmly kept his gaze elsewhere.

"... Okay" Paige finally relented, "Okay, you're… you're fine… Need a lift to the hospital?"

"Oh, there he is" Toby greeted, "Man, you'd just do anything to get out of work, huh?"

Svlvester smiled when he saw them, and Walter felt the vice grip around his heart loosen a notch.

"Hey, pal" Happy kissed his forehead as they gathered around his bed.

"How you doing, kid?"

"Good. I'm on morphine".

Paige laughed, "We missed you today".

"Could have used you on the case" Walter added, trying to ignore the concerned look that Cabe was still sending his way.

"What's in the box?"

"Oh, something I have owed you for six years" Toby announced dramatically, "Super Fun Guy comics. First 50 issues. Silver Age classics".

He pulled out the pristine set of comic books one by one and a wide smile slowly spread across his face.

"Toby, that's your whole paycheck".

"I know, and it's making me sick" He said dryly, "I'm gonna go now, cause I'm a doctor, and I know you need your rest. Otherwise, I'd be staying here all night, pal. The rest of you clowns, let this guy sleep".

"Okay" Paige agreed, "See you tomorrow, Sylvester".

She kissed his cheek before following Toby and Happy to the door. Cabe loitered behind, and Walter wondered if he wanted a private word with him.

"I'm not gonna kiss you" Gallo patted Sly's shoulder, "Take care, kid".

"Thanks".

The agent gave Walter a pointed look as he passed, but he blatantly ignored it. He'd killed a guy for this kid, he could damn well have a few extra minutes with him.

"So my sister's taking good care of you?"

"The best".

"Yea, I thought she would" Walter replied, "Uh, one question before I go. Um, quick brain teaser, see how the cranium's feeling".

"Walter, the doctor said he's fine" Megan scolded.

"Fire away" Sylvester interrupted, and she gave him an annoyed but amused look.

Walter was too tense to laugh, knowing that the next answer to his question would like make or break him.

"Okay, so if a man weighing 160 pounds, with an arm span of 69 inches and a height of 72 inches reaches down at a 90-degree angle to, uh, pick up a man weighing 200 pounds… could he lift him?"

"That's not a brain teaser. Megan told me what happened on the roof".

And there went that plan.

"That weight, that angle" Sly answered anyway, "He would have pulled you over".

It was strangely unfulfilling. There was no relief with the answer, no closure or- or even justification because-

"Right, but I didn't know that when I, uh… hesitated".

They both remained quiet and Walter thought, fair enough. He wasn't sure how he'd respond to someone saying that to him, either. So instead, he gently takes hold of Sly's hand for a moment before heading towards the door.

"Bye, Megan" He called over his shoulder, "I'll see you at work, Sylvester".

He could feel both their stares on his back as he left.

Walter took the long way out of the hospital, needing time to think and process and generally just figure out what he was feeling. Sly was right, the man would have pulled him over the ledge and they both would have died. But the fact is, he didn't know that's what would have happened until after he let the man fall.

He'd still killed him.

And his brain was having a very difficult time accepting that.

"Hey" He suddenly said, seeing Agent Taylor step out in front of him, "What are you doing here?"

"Checking on your friend. The nurse said he'll make a full recovery".

"Yea".

She glanced him up and down, lips slightly parted, pupils dilating and-

"Walter, I've been waiting seven long years for that drink I told you about. Would you have it with me?"

On a good day, he'd say no. He wasn't the dating type, not after his last failed relationship, and being with an Interpol agent would make things messy. In theory, today should have been a good day. Sylvester was fine, the bad guys were caught, and the good guys got their diamonds back. It should have been a very good day.

But Walter had let a man plummet to his death, listened to his final breaths, and watched as his blood stained the car he'd landed on.

Right now, he wanted nothing more than to get out of his own head.

"I'd like that" He forced a smile, "Yea".

He very quickly realised that it wouldn't work.

Walter had dinner with Agent Taylor- call me Simone -and had drinks and dessert and a very… enjoyable evening. But everytime he looked at her, he saw the explosion that almost killed Sly, saw the look on her face after he let the man fall, saw the attraction in her eyes as she asked him on a date and realised that he felt nothing in response.

"My plane doesn't leave till the morning" She said, placing her hand over his, "We could take this celebration back to my hotel".

It was tempting. But statistically speaking, if he wasn't attracted to her now, then her being naked would have no affect on him either. He was… troubled. By what he'd seen, what he'd done, what he hadn't done. And right now, he knew that a half-drunk one-night-stand wouldn't cut it for him.

Simone leaned forward and kissed him, slowly, sensually, and unknowingly sealed the deal. As she leant back, he couldn't help but shake his head and sigh.

"Simone, you're… you are smart, you're impressive, you're, uh… you're beautiful. I'm flattered, but, um… there's somewhere else I-I feel I need to be tonight".

She smiled, briefly and nodded understandingly.

"Okay".

Walking back into the hospital room, he wasn't surprised to find Toby and Happy already there, the latter fast asleep and the former slowly getting there. He nodded, sat down at the foot of Sly's bed, and immediately felt more at ease. Being surrounded by his team didn't change what had happened… but it somehow made it easier to bear.

A few minutes later, Cabe arrived too, not even pausing when he caught sight of them gathered around the sleeping man's bed. He walked over, taking the seat next to Walter and the younger man got the horrible feeling that this whole big talk he'd been putting off was about to start now.

"What you said earlier-"

As usual, he was right.

"-about not feeling bad about what happened" Cabe continued quietly, "That true?"

"You know me. When do I ever say things I don't mean?"

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw the man's face tighten, but whether because of worry or disappointment, he wasn't sure. Either way, it made something unpleasant churn in his stomach, and he already had enough guilt for one day.

"... It wasn't a lie" Walter eventually whispered, "But… But it wasn't the full truth, either".

Cabe relaxed minutely and waited for him to continue.

"I don't feel bad. Not really. I feel… something, but it isn't bad. Regret, maybe, or… or culpability, but not bad".

In the darkness of the night with only the beeping of hospital monitor's and Happy's faint snores, it was somehow easier to say these things out loud.

"I hesitated" He admitted, "When I reached him and- and saw him there, clinging to the rooftop, I… I hesitated".

"And that's what's eating you up inside?"

He shrugged, firmly keeping his gaze on Sly and not on the concerned man next to him.

"I guess. The 'what ifs' keep spiralling around in my head. I know it's stupid, I know it won't change anything, but… but I still can't seem to turn them off".

"You hesitated" Cabe allowed, choosing his words carefully,"But you still tried to save him, in the end, and that's what counts. He hurt one of our own, son. If I'd been in your situation, then I would have done the exact same thing".

Walter frowned and finally turned to face him. Honest blue eyes looked back at him.

"You would have let your desire for revenge get in the way of another man's life? I've got little to no EQ, Cabe, what's your excuse?"

He huffed a surprise laugh but nodded all the same.

"Revenge isn't cold, son. It can be vicious and cruel and… and consuming. But it's human. I know you kids like to strut around the place pretending you're all emotionless robots, and to a certain extent, I admit, you are. But revenge runs deep. Revenge, fear, rage… That's what we all are at our most basic level" Cabe smiled at him, small but reassuring, "It's normal that you hesitated, Walter. Expected, even. That man almost killed your family and- and I don't care how emotionless or how detached you say you are… that's not something that you can ignore".

He swallowed thickly, the vice around his chest loosening further and further with even word that the man said.

"Don't beat yourself up over this, son. You just reacted like anyone would have. If you'd reached out and grabbed him in time, then he would have pulled you over too. So I, for one, am bloody glad that you hesitated".

"Hear hear".

Walter blinked and turned as Toby lifted the brim of his hat. The doctor gave him an innocent look.

"Oh, I'm sorry, was I meant to continue pretending to be asleep for a while longer?"

Happy snorted and then immediately groaned when she realised that she'd just given herself away too.

"You lot were awake the whole damn time?!" Cabe demanded, and Walter couldn't help but grin.

"Well, not all of us" Toby replied somewhat guiltily, "I mean, Sly's still out of it, but… well, he was drugged, so… not sure if that counts".

Happy punched him lightly in the shoulder as she straightened up and stretched.

"If it helps, I actually was asleep until the whole "I'd have killed that guy too" part".

"Quinn!" Cabe snapped.

"You asked!" She shot back, "And for what it's worth, Walt? I'd have done the same thing… but I wouldn't have tried to help him in the end".

"Ditto" Toby agreed, "So from where I'm standing? Or, sitting, actually, it seems to me that you actually handled the situation better than three fifths of this room".

"Three fifths?" He questioned, and the man smirked, "I mean, I know Sly wouldn't have wanted to kill him… he just would have refused to go up on that roof, first day. Either way, same outcome".

He shook his head in equal parts amusement and exasperation but couldn't ignore the fact his head had stopped spinning for the first time that night.

"Now, I don't know about you lot" Toby finished, reaching for a comic book, "But I bet that Paige will walk through that door in the next half hour. Who's with me?"