It's a fairly brief update, but I hope you enjoy it. Emotions are not in my wheelhouse, but I hope I am able to convey these father/son moments in a way that makes sense and flows well. The next few chapters will be those kind of moments and rebuilding and reestablishing that relationship. And then more angst and drama...haha

Happy Friday!

"So this is…all yours?" I stood there, turning my head to look around at the house I was standing in. Yesterday I had been released into Winter's custody, still pending multiple evaluations, doctor's appointments, therapy appointments and a multitude of other must do's. We got on a plane and now here I was back in Louisiana, standing in my father's house eyeing everything and recognizing nothing.

"It's ours, this is your home." His tone as he said the word home was strained, as if he was willing me with his words to remember this place.

"My home…" My hands were clasped behind me as I repeated the word. "What does that mean exactly? This is where we lived together?" Dad began to speak, but stopped himself choosing instead to motion for me to follow him further into the home. We stopped in the hallway, and he looked at the photographs on the wall. He pointed to the one the furthest down the wall. "That's me! And, you!" It was a photo of me at the only other age I remembered, five. My hair was longer, I had on clothes that were a bit too big for me, a red t-shirt and a pair of black gym shorts, and my eyes had a lost look that echoed how I was currently feeling.

"This was the day I brought you here for the first time." He slowly moved his hand to my right shoulder and gave it a squeeze. "The day I swore I was going to keep you safe." I watched as he bit his lip and his jaw tensed. Dad was full of emotion, whereas I had nothing but confusion.

"You rescued me from HYDRA…twice now." I felt a smirk play on my face. "I would have to say that's probably all you can do. I'm safe." It was my turn to pat his shoulder. "Safe here with you Dad." He cleared his throat before looking at me.

"You saved me from them once as well. Not too long ago." I chuckled at his statement.

"We really need to steer clear of those assholes, Dad." Speaking the title again felt more comfortable. Using it seemed to relax the older man and if that was all I could do to help him as he dealt with losing the part of me he was close to, then I would do what I could.

"As of lately, it's been more you that needs to watch out…Lance." Hesitantly he used the name, watching for my reaction.

"Well I haven't expired…so there's that." I spoke with a shrug and Dad laughed, a full chuckle.

"Son, you're too damn hard headed to kill." Cracking a smile I had to shrug again.

"I'm sure there's something in my DNA that is to thank for that." Dad laughed again, and I truly like that sound. It was uncontrolled, sudden, yet not jarring. His laughter came from deep in his chest and the smile that came with it gave me hope.

"Again…" The voice held no emotion and though I couldn't see the person's face, I knew it was McMillan.

"Lance Buchanan Barnes, Army Captain, Captain America…" The slap came hard and fast across my face. "James Barnes, Sam Wilson, Mattie…" Rattling off names that came easily, remembering an SUV and ice cream for some reason. Suddenly pain ripped through me and I couldn't help the scream that escaped my mouth.

"Lance…" I felt someone touching my arm and I swung, expecting to connect with General McMillan. Instead I heard metal strike metal which jarred me out of my nightmare.

"What the…" Opening my eyes, it was dark except for light coming in the doorway from the hall. Dad was kneeling down next to me. His flesh and blood hand on my flesh and blood shoulder, and his metal hand holding mine. Realizing I had swung on him, I tried to relax and pulled my hand away from his. "I was back there…" I muttered as I sat up fully, holding myself up with my left arm. I was drenched in sweat and felt myself shiver.

"Nightmare." He settled into a more comfortable spot on the floor. "I heard you screaming."

"I apologize." I wiped some sweat from my face with my visibly shaking right hand. "You can go back to sleep. Sorry I woke you up." Looking at the man sitting in front of me, I sighed. He'd obviously been through his own hell, he had been a product of HYDRA and had dealt with all that getting free entailed and then broke kid me out of the same situation. James Barnes had thought he was home free with a family unit, just for me to regress the pair of us back into this shit show all over again. "You don't have to do this." I looked down at the balled up blanket we were both sitting on. "Turn me over to the government and wash your hands on me. I'm not alright, and who knows if or when I ever will be." He scoffed and shook his head.

"Up." He stood and waited for me to follow suit. Getting to my feet I waited for further instruction. "Come here." We walked out of the room and across the hall to the bathroom. Dad switched the light on and stood in front of the mirror, motioning me to stand next to him. Looking at our reflections, I had to do a double take. It was the first time I had seen myself, besides the pictures Zola had scrolled through. Those didn't make it real, but now, standing all but shoulder to shoulder with the man that had raised Lance, raised me, my jaw dropped.

"That's me?" I brought my hand up to touch the dark scruff on my face as my reflection did the same. My eyes darted from me to Dad and back again. "Holy shit…" Standing there in the mirror, the resemblance was insane. He had a few more years, his hair grey as was his full beard, a few wrinkles in the corners of his eyes, but that was the aged version of myself. In my memories I recalled how similar our eyes were, but now to stand here I saw it. I looked just like the Winter Soldier in my kid memories, though my hair was shorter, I was that guy. Even down to our metal left arms, were much more similar than would happen just by chance. "They…shit…they really created me as your replacement…"

"No." His voice was stern, almost enough to halt even the thoughts in my head. "They made me a father, they gave me my son."

"You're sure you're up to this?" Dad eyed me cautiously as he stood by the door. Neither of us had gone back to sleep following my nightmare and our father son moment, opting instead to go for an early morning run. Now we were back at the house and Dad had mentioned going to grab breakfast. The suggestion had felt like something he had probably done tons of times before. I was certain he hadn't meant to offer going out in public for food due to the current situation. But without thinking, I had agreed.

"Yes sir." I replied. "Maybe it'll help a memory return? It can't hurt can it?" Dad gave a soft smile as he stuffed his hands in the pockets of his jeans. He was wearing jeans, a blue long sleeve shirt over a t-shirt. I still was struggling with looking at him and accepting that that was Winter, Winter was my dad.

"We can do whatever you're up for kid. But don't rush it. Take your time. If you don't want to do something, you don't HAVE to. Remember you have a choice." I nodded slowly as he spoke. Having a choice was nice, but also stressful. After taking a shower this morning, I had to decide what to wear. The decision wasn't made for me, I had to think about it and it probably took longer than it should have. I had on brown shorts, a black hooded sweatshirt that had West Point Baseball on it, and a pair of black sneakers on my feet. It felt comfortable, it felt like it's something Lance would do. That thought was something that came to mind earlier when picking out clothes and the outfit just felt right. There was a warmth in my gut and almost a sense of calm acceptance. The piece of the puzzle fit right in. I had no idea what the picture was going to look like, but it was progress.

"I want to go eat breakfast with you. It's something we do right? The same place? For as long as we've lived here?" Dad nodded. "Okay, so let's go. My stomach is growling." I gave him a smile that I hoped put him at ease with me wanting to do this.

"Alright kid, let's go."