Chapter Five: Seeking Urgent Advice, My Son Has Started to Resemble My Foolish Little Brother, Should I Vault Him?

Inko clapped her hands together. "Let's bring to order the first meeting of the Women to Change Japan Group!" She beamed at Nao and Rei, sitting across from her at the picnic table. A pavilion covered the eating area in the park.

Izuku felt bad for both women, who looked a combination of confused and terrified. He wondered if he'd unleashed a monster on them.

Rei said, "I don't know anything about changing Japan. I'm just here because you promised you could ensure that I got full custody of my children, despite my husband being Number Two Ranked hero." She sounded like she didn't know if she believed it.

"My own dear husband is already taking care of that." Inko held up her phone. A text from her husband showed Endeavor's popularity rate plummeting after certain facts being revealed to the public. These included his record of unnecessarily murdering criminals, his quirk marriage and subsequent spousal abuse, and him being caught with his pants down in a brothel with a duck. Izuku was almost completely certain the duck incident had been faked. Or at least he certainly hoped so.

Just below the picture, Izuku could barely read his father's text message: Inko, darling, if you want to adopt strays so badly, I could bring home a cat.

Inko's emoji-filled response: I'll take the cat too! Love you!

Rei's eyes welled up. "Thank you. I'm grateful, I truly am." She dabbed her face with a handkerchief. "I don't know how I can repay you. I have no background in political activism."

"As long as you keep baking such delicious snacks, that can be your contribution to the group." Inko picked up a blueberry scone and took a bite.

Nao shifted. "I can help with funding from my company?"

"Oh, we have plenty of money, but it's still so sweet of you to offer." Inko held up the plate. "Who wants another scone?"

The sound of children giggling drifted over. In a grassy area across from the pavilion, Hana Shimura played soccer with the older Todoroki siblings.

Yuuto pushed Shouto Todoroki on the swings. Behind them, Katsuki Bakugo slid down the slides. Mom had been asked to babysit Katsuki today.

Izuku's eyes lit up. A miniature Kacchan! He couldn't resist heading over to take a peek.

As Izuku approached, he overheard Katsuki saying to Yuuto, "I heard you got a new quirk. Hurry up and show me so I can see if you're good enough to be my sidekick."

Despite his usual poisonous mouth, he sure did look cute from his chubby cheeks to his little fangs. It was a pity Izuku would probably look creepy if he tried to tousle that spikey hair.

Yuuto looked up. "Sorry, my quirk is too dangerous to use." He sounded utterly disinterested in Katsuki…which Izuku knew from personal experience was a good way to piss the explosive boy off.

Sure enough, Katsuki snapped, "I bet you were lying about getting a quirk. You're still a useless Deku."

Yuuto's head shot up. "What did you just call my perfect nephew?"

"What?" Katsuki stared.

Izuku picked up his pace in hopes of preventing the detonation, but he was too late.

In the space of seconds, Yuuto had his foot on top of Katsuki's head. He ground the blond boy's face into the dirt. "Watch your mouth, you spikey-haired brat."

Izuku picked his uncle up under his arms and lifted him off. "What do you think you're doing?"

Without remorse, Yuuto said, "Playground rules are survival of the fittest, so I'm establishing dominance."

Izuku whispered, "Is it heroic for an adult to fight a toddler? Don't you have years of martial arts training?"

"I'm teaching him a valuable life lesson, namely that someone is always stronger. This knowledge could one day save his life, especially if he plans to become a hero."

"Uh-huh. Knock it off." Izuku turned around to see Shouto staring at both of them. His heart flip-flopped at the adorable child with half-white, half-red hair falling into his eyes. The stern pout on his face only made him look cuter. Izuku longed to pick him up and hug him, but coming from a strange man that wouldn't be taken well.

Sticking a finger in his mouth, Shouto said, "I don't think you're the same age as me. You use too many big words."

Yuuto and Izuku exchanged frantic glances.

"What a silly thing to say," Izuku said.

"How much older could I be? Look at me." Yuuto waved a hand down his body.

Shouto sucked on his thumb. "You could be a shapeshifter or body-swapper."

Yuuto's eyes shifted. "Ha-ha. The imagination of this child."

"Did you just call me a child? That sounds like something a grownup would say." Shouto stared intently.

"This is all your fault, you pint-sized martial artist," Izuku whispered to his uncle.

Yuuto whispered back, "Relax, no one is going to believe him."

Shouto said, "I'm going to go tell Mom and Mrs. Midoriya that Izuku has been replaced by a fake."

"Hey! Stop!" Izuku chased after Shouto as he ran for the pavilion.

To make matters even more dangerous, his father had rolled up in a black limousine. Hisashi stepped out wearing a black suit and holding a pet carrier.

Inko ran up to him and pecked him on the cheek. "Is this for me?"

"Your cat, my dear." Hisashi held up the cage. Angry hissing came from inside. The tomcat was clearly a stray—he was missing an eye and his black fur intersected with patches of rashes. He yowled and rattled the cage bars.

"He's gorgeous. I love him," Inko said.

"Take this peace offering and stop making me commit good deeds."

Inko giggled and stroked her husband's clean-shaven cheek. "As if you didn't enjoy destroying Endeavor."

"That was fun, but I'm not helping you rewrite Japan's divorce law to make it more—" Hisashi shuddered "—fair."

Inko poo-pooed with her hand. "I can handle that on my own."

Shouto tugged on Hisashi's pant leg. "Your son may be an alien pod person."

Izuku sucked in a breath. His muscles tensed, ready to leap forward for a rescue.

Hisashi stared down coldly. "I suggest you find someone interested in your games, little boy." Poison dripped off every word.

Shouto retreated, muttering, "Never mind, you two are clearly related. Maybe you're some sort of immortal evil being, and that's why your son is so strange. Yes, that would explain a lot."

A thud made Izuku turn around. Katsuki knelt in the dirt again, with Yuuto looming over him.

Izuku rubbed a hand down his face. He'd only taken his eyes off them for a minute! The scent of pollen gave him a headache. His nose tickled and he coughed. Still hacking and wheezing, he ran back again.

With his arms crossed, Yuuto said, "My first order is for you to obtain oatmeal raisin cookies."

"Yes, Izuku-sama," Katsuki said, leaping up massaging Yuuto's shoulders in a subservient way.

"Nice try on the cookies." Hisashi appeared in a flash, smiling in an amused fashion. "Scram." He pointed at Kacchan, and the child fled.

Yuuto pouted.

"Don't make that face. I'm very proud of you." Hisashi tried to ruffle Yuuto's hair. Yuuto dodged. "Look at Daddy's little villain, conquering your classmates even at such a tender age. You clearly got all my brains and charisma, unlike my younger brother, who always was a bit of a fool."

Yuuto's eye twitched. "Hypothetically, maybe you smothered your brother so he never had a chance to reach his full potential."

Hisashi laughed. "What an oddly mature thing for a toddler to say. Look at you, using big words like 'hypothetically!' You're wrong, but I'm still impressed you could deduce such a coherent counter-argument. You really are a genius!"

Izuku massaged his aching forehead. Would nothing make his father notice something strange up with his son? Thank goodness he was such an idiotically doting dad.

"I'm so proud." Hisashi tried for a hug.

Yuuto dodged. "Keep your hands to yourself, foolish father."

As Hisashi attempted to reach out again, Yuuto's fingers curved like claws. He looked so ready to murder that Izuku started to get worried.

Hisashi reached into his pocket. "What if I offered to let you have just one cookie? Would that be worth a hug? I have a chocolate chip cookie here."

Yuuto sneered. "Pshaw. Maybe if it was oatmeal raisin."

"But chocolate chip is your favorite!" Hisashi looked confused.

Running over, Izuku hissed, "That's right, chocolate chip is your favorite."

"Oatmeal raisin! Accept no substitutes!" Yuuto screamed.

What had gotten into him? Izuku reached for his uncle, determined to stop his mouth. Yuuto leapt into his arms and clung to his neck. Sniffling, he muttered, "I want cookies!"

This seemed rather strange. Flashing a strained smile at his father, Izuku asked, "Can we have a moment?"

"Why will you hug him?" Hisashi scowled. "You even switched to liking you uncle's favorite kind of cookie…"

"It's very coincidental," Izuku said brightly, walking away at top speed.

As soon as he got Yuuto behind a tree, he asked, "Are you trying to get us caught or just stupid?" His head throbbed. A cough itched at the back of his throat. He hadn't meant to speak so sharply. His pain had made that come out wrong. He sucked in a deep breath and calmed himself. "Is something wrong?"

"Maybe?" The adult in a child's body clutched his head. "I don't know why I acted like that, either. I'm sorry."

"Do you think your maturity level has been affected by your physical body?"

"It's hard to tell. I was never an overly mature adult."

Izuku swooped down his hand. "Got your nose!" He held up his fingers with his thumb nestled in between.

Yuuto giggled.

Izuku sighed. "Yes, I think that's a strong indicator that your mental state is regressing towards that of a toddler."

"Oh, no!" Yuuto clutched his head. "I still have all my memories, but I have been experiencing difficulty controlling my emotions." He sniffled. "Now I feel like crying! This is so embarrassing!"

This explained a lot about his uncle's previous behavior. It also had a severe potential for disaster. This masquerade was hard enough without his partner in crime experiencing spontaneous temper-tantrums.

"I see." Izuku sighed. "I'm sorry I snapped at you before."

"The illness is acting up today, isn't it?" Yuuto looked him over. "I know how it is. My brother could tell you what a bitch I could be back in the days before we could afford pain medication. It's okay."

"It's not okay. I shouldn't have taken out my pain on someone else."

"Don't be too hard on yourself. Self-forgiveness is important when you're stuck with a chronic illness. You're going to have bad days." The deep sympathy in Yuuto's voice could only come from someone who'd lived through the same thing. "You're having trouble sleeping, aren't you?"

Izuku rubbed the bags under his eyes. "I haven't slept the whole night through since I ended up in your body," he admitted.

"Mediation and deep breathing always helped me. Do you know how?"

"Yeah. Aizawa had a class on how to mediate." Remembering his teacher made Izuku's eyes sting. He reminded himself that Aizawa was currently still alive. And would remain that way unless Izuku screwed up his mission—which felt increasingly likely. "I've been too tired every night to even floss my teeth." He didn't know why he'd admitted that or why he wanted to cry even more now.

"Don't let it worry you, I've always had naturally great teeth. Get my brother to bring you a heating pad to sleep on tonight." Yuuto met his eyes. "Seriously, don't be too hard on yourself. I'm saying it again because that's the single most important piece of advice I can give you about living with a chronic illness. Treat every little thing you can accomplish as a victory."

"I'll try."

"I promise to listen to your complaints anytime."

"Thanks." Izuku smiled. "I'd better go do damage control with my father. How about you hide out with Mom's group? Stay away from Dad at all costs."

"I'm always happy to avoid my brother." Yuuto trundled off.

Before Izuku could find his dad, his lungs seized up. The world spun. He doubled-over, coughing. The pain attacked every part of his body at the same time, making him weak and dizzy. Blood trickled between his fingers. He hated this illness so much.

The worst part? Unlike a cold or his many broken bones, a chronic illness would never get better. If he remained in this body, he might never have another day without pain for the rest of his entire life.

"Hey." Hisashi appeared by his side. "Do you have your inhaler? No? I have a spare in my car."

Izuku just coughed even harder.

Slinging his arm over his shoulder, Hisashi helped him towards the limo.

"Thanks," Izuku wheezed. While so close, he took the opportunity to subtly explore the contents of his father's pockets. Like Uncle Yuuto had said, he'd take his small victories where he could find them.

"Don't try to talk." Hisashi set him down on a car seat and brought over the inhaler.

After a while, Izuku started to be able to breathe again. His head still spun and ached. The sunlight overhead pounded into him like a hammer. Closing his eyes, he leaned backward.

"Are you feeling better?" Hisashi asked.

"As better as I ever feel." Izuku opened one eye. "Thank you."

"If you're feeling up to it, would you give me some advice?"

Very curious, Izuku said, "Sure."

Hisashi sat down. "I can't figure out why my son will let you hug him, but not me. He used to run up to me begging for hugs and kisses."

Izuku shifted uneasily. "Kids. They grow up so fast. Maybe it's a phase."

"But he looks at me like I'm something he scraped off his shoe. He avoids calling me 'Dad.' That's not even the worst part. A few times, I've seen him flinch like he's genuinely scared of me." Hisashi's head drooped. "I would never hurt Izuku. He's the most important thing in my life. I don't understand why he would ever feel threatened by me."

It's probably because you beat Uncle Yuuto so hard he ended up in a coma, Mister Self-Proclaimed Family Man. I assume your relationship was thoroughly trashed by the time matters reached that point. But since Izuku couldn't say that out loud, instead he said, "That incident when he had a nightmare and accidentally attacked you must have traumatized him. Maybe he's not afraid of you, he's afraid of hurting you. It would also explain why he's in denial about inheriting your quirk." Smiling broadly to cover up the absolute bullshit he'd been spewing, Izuku added, "You should find a quirk counselor for him, but make sure to avoid the ones who believe some quirks are villainous."

"What a great idea," Hisashi said, sitting up straighter. No doubt the lie had worked because he wanted to believe it. "Once I get him help for his trauma, I'm sure he'll be hugging me again in no time."

Izuku didn't want to overpromise or it might backfire later. "Give him a while to get used to you. You don't spend that much time around him, so maybe he's not familiar enough with you—"

"What are you talking about? I set aside time for Izuku every single day. I've never missed a family dinner. I read him a bedtime story every night."

"Oh." Izuku didn't remember this. He must have been too young. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have assumed. I thought your work would keep you busy."

"My family is the most important thing in the world to me. I would always put Izuku ahead of anything." Hisashi's eyes filled with determination. "The only things that could ever keep me away from him would be if I was severely injured or if I had to stay away for his own safety."

His dad's fight with All Might. That was when he'd stopped coming home. Because it had happened around the same time as his diagnosis, Izuku had always assumed that his father had abandoned him after he'd turned out quirkless. But that hadn't been it after all.

It shouldn't matter, so many years later. Yet somehow, it did. Izuku swallowed a lump in his throat. "I'm very happy to hear you say that."

"Izuku loves you so much despite just meeting you." Hisashi sighed. "Why does he treat us so differently?"

"I'm his brand-new uncle. I'm a novelty." Izuku shrugged. "You know what kids are like. They're attracted to shiny new toys, and they're not sensitive to other's feelings. I'm sure Izuku doesn't mean to hurt you—he's just so used to hugging you that you've become old news."

"You really think that's it?" Hisashi perked up.

"Maybe you should try playing hard to get. Back off with the physical affection, and he'll start to want it again." In reality, Izuku only gave this advice to buy a little time for him and his uncle to do what they needed to do. The less close his father got to his fake son, the less likely he'd notice something strange.

Hisashi smiled. "Maybe you understand Izuku because that's exactly what you were like as a child. If I tried to hug you, you'd be all like 'Big brother, I'm too old for cuddling' but if I left you alone for a few days, you'd be crawling all over me."

"If that tactic worked on Y—" Izuku cut himself off. How could he have been so stupid? He'd have to stop criticizing his uncle, because it was easier to do than it looked. "—on me, then I'm sure it will work on your son. You could say I have a strong feeling about it."

Hisashi patted his back. "I feel like you've become so much more mature and intelligent ever since you came out of your coma."

"Uh, thank you." Izuku hoped that wasn't suspicious.

"You haven't tried to bite me even once."

Uncle Yuuto had set the bar very low, hadn't he?

That night, Izuku went to Yuuto's bedroom for a strategic meeting. Unlike his room, it didn't have cameras. They'd both done a thorough scan.

Yuuto shifted on his bed. "I'm sorry again about how I acted at the park."

"Don't feel bad. I understand much better now I know that you're being influenced by the age of your body."

Yuuto pinched his forehead. "All the more reason we should save the world as quickly as possible. My brother seems to be getting more suspicious, and I seem to be getting more useless. Any luck on getting Dr. Garaki alone?"

"He's constantly in his laboratory, surrounded by Nomu." Izuku sighed. "I have no quirk, and you have a quirk you can't use. We won't be fighting off any Nomu. Certainly not when you're four years old and I have a trash body. Uh, no offense."

"None taken. I lived with my body for my entire life. I know it's trash."

"Maybe we should try telling Dad the truth about the end of the world?"

Yuuto stared at him. "Wouldn't that mean telling him the truth about us as well?"

"No way to avoid it. But if we could save the world, wouldn't it be worth it? I think Dad might be more reasonable than I expected."

"He's starting to get to you already?" Yuuto snorted.

Annoyed partly because it might be true, Izuku said, "At the least, I know he doesn't want Mom to die or Japan to turn to dust before he can rule it."

"Sure, I'll give you that, but if he can find a way to use Quirk Singularity to destroy Hero Society without also destroying what he loves, then he'll do it in a heartbeat. As soon as you give him your knowledge of the future, he'll start looking for a way. Neither of us will have a chance at stopping him from whatever safe location he decides to put us 'for our own protection.'"

Izuku winced. "You're right. It was a dumb idea. I'm sorry."

"Hey, I didn't mean it like that." Yuuto's eyes became gentle. "No one understands better than me. I've never once enjoyed fighting my brother. Even by the very end, I still wished for another way."

Izuku didn't want to keep talking about this. "If we find evidence that Dr. Garaki is working on more projects like Quirk Singularity behind Dad's back, that might be enough to get him eliminated. We could remove any dangerous bits of information before exposing him to Dad."

"I like that idea." Yuuto nodded. "At the very least, we should definitely search the doctor's computers. We need to know if he's already started researching how to trigger Quirk Singularity. If yes, then we need to destroy his work."

"Agreed. Let's do it tonight." Izuku straightened. "I already pickpocketed Dad's coat and obtained the key card to the laboratory."

"If you were checking his coat pockets, then I don't suppose you found that cookie?" Yuuto's eyes widened pleadingly.

Izuku sighed. His regular throbbing headache worsened. "It wasn't a top priority at the time. Look, just help me save the world and I promise I'll get you a cookie."

"An oatmeal raisin cookie."

"Yes, an oatmeal raisin cookie."

Dr. Garaki's laboratory looked even creepier in the darkness. Izuku's flashlight cast shadows across the network of tubes. Beakers glowed strange colors. The sphere floating overhead hummed and whirred. A helmet with wires attached lay on a bloodstained slab. The dust in the air made it even harder than usual to breathe.

Stepping over a fallen wrench, Izuku said, "This place is a mess. Let's get out of here as quickly as possible."

"Agreed." Yuuto lifted a stack of papers as tall as himself off the computer chair.

Izuku sat down in front of the computer and plugged his stolen card into the reader. The screen woke up, casting light across the room.

"Whaz?" someone mumbled.

Izuku and Yuuto exchanged panicked glances.

Dr. Garaki sat up. He'd been lying on one of the slabs, hidden from view behind stacks of books and papers. Since he still wore his lab coat and glasses, he'd probably fallen asleep here after working late.

There was no time to hide. His sleepy gaze fell on the two guilty parties standing in front of his computer.

Izuku leapt forward and punched the doctor in the jaw with all his measly strength. Luckily, the decrepit scientist wasn't any stronger than an invalid. He fell backward, scattering papers in his fall.

Dust tickled Izuku's nose. He coughed. Then he couldn't stop coughing, until a trickle of blood ran down his lip.

Yuuto ran over and found the inhaler in his pocket. With his small hands, he helped hold it over Izuku's face.

"Thanks," Izuku choked out. He looked at the unconscious doctor. "What do we do with him?"

Yuuto whipped out a scalpel and slit Dr. Garaki's throat.

It was over before the villainous scientist even had time to gurgle. Izuku leapt back to avoid the spray of blood. He stared at his uncle.

"What?" Yuuto shrugged and flicked a drop off his cheek. "He was just lying there all vulnerable without a single Nomu to protect him. Problem solved, world saved."

"Why were you even carrying around that scalpel?"

"To use on my brother next time he tries to hug me, duh."

Izuku knelt down to take the doctor's pulse. He found no traces of life. After his initial surprise had worn off, he couldn't muster any real qualms. "That takes care of our primary objective. Now let's wipe all data related to Quirk Singularity from his computer, then get out of here before we get caught."

As if on cue, the lights flickered on.

Both Izuku and Yuuto turned to see Hisashi standing in the doorway. Inko's new black cat wound around his ankles.

Hisashi took in the sight of his supposed son standing over the doctor's corpse holding a bloody scalpel.

Izuku expected his father would congratulate his son on his first murder and maybe rant about Daddy's little villain.

Instead, Hisashi shrieked, "Who are you and what have you done with my real son?"

Nope, that had done it. Izuku sighed. He supposed a four-year-old committing murder had been a bit too much for even the most doting father to swallow.

OMAKE TIME!

Omake: As Soon as Izuku's Back was Turned

Katsuki: I'm ready for round two, Deku. I'm going to put you back in the hospital. That's where someone was worthless as you belongs.

Yuuto: (smiles) Oh, you are, are you?

Katsuki: Ahhhhh! Deku has gone feral!

Later:

Yuuto: What do you call me?

Katsuki: Izuku-sama.

Yuuto: And what do you not call me?

Katsuki: Dek—ahh, I mean the name which must not be said! Please forgive me, Izuku-sama!

#

Omake: Yuuto is Still Salty About the Quirk Incident

Hisashi: My darling son, I have a present for you.

Yuuto: Is it one of those gifts I can't turn down?

Hisashi: Well, uh, no, but I was going to ask for a hug in exchange.

Yuuto: Ah, gifts with strings attached, your other favorite.

Hisashi: Just one hug for your wonderful father?

Yuuto: If I ever meet a wonderful father, then of course I'll be happy to give All Might a hug.

#

Omake: If Kai Chisaki Had Passed by the Park

Izuku: Hmm, an ethical dilemma. Eri hasn't even been born yet, so Chisaki hasn't done anything to her. Nor will I let him do so in this timeline. Is it ethical to punish someone for crimes they haven't yet committed? Of course, he's still a yakuza and that godawful fashion sense is a crime in its own right. What the hell, you only travel back in time once.

Hisashi: What are you mumbling about, baby brother?

Izuku: That guy in the bird mask bumped into me and then tried to extort money from me. (He wipes a fake tear from his eye.) Big brother, my arm hurts.

Hisashi: Excuse me, I have something to take care of.

Izuku: I wonder if I can get rid of Muscular the same way.

#

Omake: Yuuto Handles Muscular

Yuuto: You're the fiend who tried to kill my nephew!

Muscular: Excuse me?

Yuuto: Take this! (Punches Muscular and breaks his hand.) Ow! Not again, Izuku is going to be so angry at me for putting his body in the hospital again. Curse this weak child body!

Hisashi: Did you just attack my son?

Muscular: I didn't do anything!

Hisashi: I suppose you were just standing there and he broke his bones at you.

Muscular: That's basically what happened.

Hisashi: Nice try. Die!

#

Omake: I Headcanon that All for One has a Highly Sensitive Family Detector and If Anyone Else Had Gotten Body Swapped Into Izuku He Would Have Caught Them Right Away, But Since His Brother and His Son Swapped, the Detector was Confused

Hisashi: There's something off about my little brother. How could his personality have changed so drastically? It makes me suspicious…

Family detector says the person he's talking to is definitely family. All systems are green.

Hisashi: Maybe I should test him again to see if the amnesia is real.

Later:

Hisashi: My son has always reminded me of my little brother, but lately the déjà vu has gotten uncanny. (Panics but for the wrong reasons.)

#

Omake: The Alternate Chapter Ending

Hisashi: My darling little boy committed his first murder at age four, just one year younger than me. I'm so proud.

Yuuto: So that's what happened to our parents!

Hisashi: Our parents? You're my brother!

Izuku: So we're doomed by plot convenience to get caught no matter what.