Written for Day Five of Sifki Week 2021 and the prompt Trick.

The little scene of Loki being DB Cooper due to losing a bet in episode 1 of the Loki series cracked me up and got me thinking about what other legends could be borne from these lost wagers.

974 AD

"This is going to be so much fun!" Thor grinned, large hands patting Sif and Loki on their backs, causing them to both to nearly stumble forward on the dias of the Bifrost. They looked at each other across Thor's broad shoulders and Sif smiled widely. Loki glared.

He did not share their merriment. There was one thing Loki hated more than anything else and that was being wrong. Which unfortunately, he recently was, wagering a bet against his friends that his newest steed could outrun both of their horses in a race around the city's walls. He was an agile, competent rider and it seemed an easy victory, until the young horse had spooked at the sound of Volstagg's boisterous cheers. Loki had been thrown from his saddle, and Thor and then Sif had each crossed the finish line well before him.

"Don't look so sour, Loki," Sif's grin grew as Heimdall turned his sword behind them. "It ruins your beauty."

"This is one of your stupider ideas," Loki complained, pulling at the uncomfortable neckline of the dress he wore. It was a rather hideous, shapeless blue frock that Thor had stolen from their mother's wardrobe. Sif and Thor were dressed rather plainly, leaving the metal of their armor behind to match the style of the current Midgardian fashion.

"Oh come on, you love having an audience!" Thor called out over the whirring of the Bifrost, bracing himself for the pull of the rainbow bridge. "Just ten minutes with the mortals and you'll be on your way."

Loki sighed and shifted his form to a more feminine version, lengthening his hair and turning it a warm shade of blonde. He landed lightly on his feet, the Bifrost dropped them near the shores of a small fishing village and Sif and Thor moved quickly off to the side, slipping to blend in with the crowd of shocked mortals that began to shout and gather around Loki.

"Peace be upon you!" Loki shouted, his voice light and high, and spread his arms out theatrically. He caught Sif's eye from where she sat on the dock. Her face was alight with joy. This was humiliating.

"Who are you?" called out several Midgardians, others dropping immediately to their knees in reverence. He did enjoy that bit.

"You do not know me?" he thought for a moment, enhancing his chest and rear to a more shapely hourglass and then called out, "I am a goddess from Asgard. And my name is Sif."

His eyes darted back over to the docks and noticed that though Thor elbowed her in amusement, Sif's smile had vanished, replaced with pursed lips and a raised brow. He would likely pay for his choice later, but currently his bruised ego craved revenge.

"Lady Sif," a man stepped forward and bowed deeply. "The winter was harsh and our crops have all withered this spring. Every day we have made sacrifices and prayed to Thor for his assistance. Have you a message from him?"

"How fortunate," Loki clutched his chest in mock-thrill, though inwardly he rolled his eyes - it had been several years since Thor had put on a little lightning show for the mortals and still they carved images of Mjolnir into the sides of buildings in his honor. "How fortuitous you are that I have heard your prayers and shall bring you salvation."

He improvised and called a blade to his hand and then cut off a lock of golden hair. He held it up for the crowd to see and then spread the shorn locks along the ground at his feet. Casting an illusion, he turned the strands of hair into sprouting seeds, making stalks of wheat grow tall and fast in their place. The mortals gasped and shouted in surprise.

"Bountiful will be the baskets of those who use my name in devotion," he continued. "Fertile lands and fertile brides." He made eye contact with the shieldmaiden, a wicked smile pulling at his lips. "There's nothing I, Sif, love more than babies!"

Several mortals moved forward then, reaching out to touch his dress sleeves in adoration, seeking blessing and pressing trinkets into his hands. Loki felt quite pleased with his mischief and heard Thor's booming laugh before he saw him throw a delighted arm around Sif's angry shoulders. Her face was sour and she glared at him with the fire of a burning star.

Oh he was in so much trouble. But that was an issue for future-Loki to sort out. He blew her a kiss, wiggling his fingers towards her in a wave. She stood up and made a slashing gesture at her throat, a threat and an indication that it was time to leave.

"Praise Sif!"

"Thank you, Sif!"

He walked slowly through the crowd, reveling in the chaos and made his way towards the docks as Thor, cheeks rosy with glee, called out to Heimdall. Lifting up his skirts, he began to trot, putting some distance between himself and the humans who called out after him.

"Such a beautiful goddess must be married to powerful Thor!"

"Sif!"

"Thor's wife! Wife of Thor!"

"Now hang on just a minute," he turned, his own low voice returning, utterly offended and prepared to clarify that it was Loki whose bed the goddess preferred. But the Bifrost had arrived and Thor grabbed him by the back of his dress, pulling them up and away from the realm.

Arriving back on Asgard, Sif's palm connected solidly with his cheek. "Really, Loki?"

Tossing his head, he shifted back to his own face and form. He flipped the hair out of his eyes and touched his stinging cheek. He probably should have expected that. "Oh, come on Sif," he put a placating hand on her shoulder. "It was just a bit of fun for the mortals. They won't even remember this in a few hundred years or so."

She shook her head for a moment in what Loki suspected was private fondness and then nodded in agreement, a small smile pulling at her lips. She brought her own hands up to his shoulders. Loki smiled too, ready to pull her into a forgiving embrace. Instead she swiftly brought her knee up to his groin and he collapsed in pain.

"Ah, your fertility," she scoffed and walked towards the door. "You can sleep alone tonight, trickster."

"See," Thor laughed, stepping over Loki's dress-tangled legs to follow her. "I told you this would be fun."

Loki wheezed on the floor. He should really stop gambling.