Author's Note: Yo! It's time for chapter 5! Hope you guys enjoy!

CHPT05:_AEGIS

My omni-tool beeps up at me. A late call that I answer, "Vakarian here."

"Hello, Garrus."

It's not a voice I expected to hear, or a face I expected to see staring up at me. "Hey, Thane."

The drell dips his head, "I'm sorry to have disturbed you. I imagine it's late on Palaven."

"Eh, don't worry about it. Not like I've been sleeping much anyway."

There's a pinch of concern in his voice and across his brow, "I hope you can get adequate rest soon. I assume the Hierarchy is taking the necessary precautions for the coming Reapers?"

"Not quite. That's why I haven't been sleeping much," I chuckle, rolling my neck. These damn reports won't do themselves.

"I am on Earth. You would have loved it here."

I say nothing for a time, watching as Thane steps out of the camera's view and shows me a slice of your ancestral home planet that I've never seen. A wide sky, an endless horizon. Kolyat gets in the way by accident, and quickly steps out of the picture – that kid's come a long way in a few months. And damn Thane and his insightfulness, he's right – I'd love to see it for myself.

"I think you should visit one day, when the war is over."

Does Mindoir look similar? "Yeah. Yeah, I'd like to. I'd bring Mom too, but she's… Well…"

"Shower her with love and kindness in these final days. I will pray for her soul."

"Thank you. Is, uh, is Shepard with you?"

"No, but that is why I called." Thane's face reappears, and then he sinks into the hardest coughing fit I've seen yet. Kolyat pats his back a few times during my silence, until Thane raises a hand and speaks again. "Excuse me. I have tried to reach her to check in, or to see if she might want to get together while I am here… but I can't get through. I thought perhaps, as her best friend, you might have had better luck."

"Nah, I haven't. I've tried too. Anderson's told me she's under strict lockdown until the Cerberus trial is done – and is alive, and annoyed."

Thane smiles, "That's my Siha."

Yeah. And I don't know if I remember what it feels like to breathe without water in my lungs.

"I'll let you go. Thank you for taking my call so late, and for telling me what you know. If you manage to speak to her, please let her know I've been trying to contact her."

He has another coughing fit and has to look away from the omni-tool. I frown. "Thane, are you all right?"

He doesn't respond for a moment, not until the coughing stops. And then he says simply, in a way that sums up the both of us, "I am drowning, and surviving."

Menae. The damn Reapers are trying to take Menae. Dishonourable machines. Saren's stain lingers.

I've run around for several hours and it feels like there's no end in sight. No way for me to find and use your optimism, Shepard, because we are running out of time. And I'm really over running out of time. I hope Dad and Sol are okay on Palaven. That they still have time.

I miss Mom.

Glancing at my omni-tool, I read over the text again as I head back to the comm. tower: 'ATTN: human envoys have arrived.'

And just underneath that, an email from Thane: 'I have heard nothing. Keep in touch.'

And below that, a news article: 'Terran Terror: Humanity On Its Knees.'

And then I see you at the comm. tower, your back to me on this moon. It feels like I've walked into a dream. But then I see Liara and another new human, and they're not usually in my dreams, so it must be real. No concussive rounds, this time. It takes all of my strength to walk, not run – and to maintain protocol, not shatter it – as I approach.

Palaven burns behind me – but that's not the fire that I stare at anymore, now that you're here.

Liara notices me first, but says nothing; and then, holding my rifle, I speak and stand in front of you like nothing at all has changed. Even though everything has changed. Our eyes lock across Menae like a grenade on the verge of exploding.

Then your smile bursts forth, and mine does too, because there is no greater joy for me.

But this warzone isn't the time for drowning. Not when there's Victus to find, and Liara leaving to secure the Normandy, and James Vega shouting about a harvester and the chaos that's yet to come.

You flick your head, "Coming, Garrus?"

"Are you kidding? I'm right behind you."

You grin and turn away with James, heading back into battle. And I'm just damn grateful you got off Earth alive. I don't follow, not just yet, busy with one quick thing that has to be done before I join you.

General Corinthus coughs, "Please stop looking at your omni-tool, sir."

"Yeah yeah, on it."

And as I run after you, a drell gets a postcard from Palaven's moon: 'Got her. Menae. Alive. Safe.'

You're more alive than you've ever been.

You still bark out orders the same. Your time under lockdown has made you more determined, though tarnished the optimism that you refound under Cerberus' thumb. But if I look at your red hair for too long, like staring closely at a star, it still burns my retinas. And if I stare into your eyes for too long, I continue to sink.

Your grin still drowns me, but I think I will always be drowning in you. Submerged forever.

"…afa. Hey, did that sound right?"

You nudge me out of reading more Palaven reports. "What?"

We're heading to Grissom Academy, because Samantha Traynor mentioned Jack, and you not only want her to be safe, but you can see the help she and her students can offer the war effort. Victus understands, but pushes for the war summit to be sooner. You push right back, because that's who you are.

But I wonder about Thane. And I wonder about his sickness, and if it has stained you.

He's asked to see you soon, at the Citadel. I look forward to seeing your joy again, Shepard.

Our eyes meet. Sea to sky, by the main battery that still needs calibrating. You point to the phrase in the language book you're reading on your omni-tool, and the press of your fingernail distorts the lettering for a few moments. "Do you think I'm saying this phrase right? I don't want to get it wrong."

"Do I look like a drell to you?"

Your amused snort, "Vakarian."

"Shepard."

"Garrus."

"Jane."

I don't remember how to breathe without water in my lungs, Shepard – I've adored you too long to know any different now.

Strangling my subvocals and faking an exasperated sigh, I look away from the reports the Primarch gave me, roll my eyes, and turn to face your omni-tool, "Hmm, let me see…"

You're brighter after seeing Thane.

When you return to the Normandy, it's like seeing you at the beginning of it all again.

Hell-bent on making a real difference, with an endless depth in your eyes. A bounce in your step, your chin raised with the smallest smile tickling the corner of your lips by default. Your optimism leaking from the inside, infecting the crew like a slow but enjoyable poison. The brightest red star the galaxy has ever known.

As if no one knew what you shouldered anymore.

The galaxy. Your second chance. Your losses. The weaker moments that you once kept so closely guarded fall into his arms instead of mine. Protected by a dying man's heart. Brought back to shore by a drell's simple smile.

I wonder if it's sunk in yet. That he may not live to see the galaxy you create, like Mom. As if we needed more heartbreak.

So I pay him a visit as well, after Kaidan. He's a partner too.

The drell hums, "Garrus! I did not expect you here."

"Ouch."

He laughs. It's weak, and breathy, and then a harsh cough follows. When it subsides, he resumes looking out the hospital window, staring from Huerta Memorial across the Citadel.

"It was wonderful to see Siha again. Six months is a long time to miss the one you love."

Try two years. Two years of drowning. Longer, now.

I dip my head a little, saying, "Shepard told me you'd keep an eye on Kaidan for us. To protect him from any enemies. Thank you for that."

"No need for your thanks. There is little aid I can offer now." You pause to cough again, though it's shallower, like an echo of the first. "Siha would not tell me much of the war effort, which I can understand, because I did not want to burden her with a… full update of my condition either. Not on our first reunion. But, I would ask you how things are, and if I may inform you instead."

I watch him return to his seat, leaning forward to rest his elbows on his knees as he stares out the hospital's window. But I remain where I am, resting against a pillar. "We just got back from Grissom, pulled Jack's ass out of one hell of a fire. I think we're going to Sur'Kesh next. You see, Shepard's trying to organise a war summit…"

And I tell him everything, even the things I'm not supposed to – because Thane's already near death, and he'd never betray you anyway.

"She missed you terribly, Thane." And it hurts to say the truth too.

He smiles for a few moments, and then it blanks out as his voice shifts again, "Words in the darkness. I miss her. Unheard in the void. I need her. Earth's sea burning. I fear for her. Kalahira, save her. Archangel, protect her."

I say nothing again. There's a weird mixture of feelings in my gut.

"Apologies. Yes, I missed her too; and you, of course, when you're not belittling other people's shooting abilities."

"You and I should have a contest real soon."

Thane shakes his head, his smile brightening for a moment and then fading like the sun sinking beneath the horizon. I wonder how his aim is, or if his hands shake now like Mom's did. His black eyes drift from me to the floor. "Are you keeping her safe?"

"Of course."

The drell gives me the full rundown of his current stage of Kepral's Syndrome. The doctors call it the final phase, but he doesn't look it. He has to pause and cough a few times, and it doesn't sound too much worse than when he was on the Normandy. I can imagine the daily treatments are exhausting, but helpful – and if he didn't join us this time, then his condition must affect his performance now.

He seems unaffected when he says, "They expect three months at the most."

My mandibles clench of their own accord. My subvocals feel thicker with sadness. "I'm sorry."

"It doesn't matter. I knew I would be near the end of my journey. I have tried hard to better this galaxy. I have stopped hurts from worsening. I brought a wonderful son into the world who works to better himself every day. I was allowed to help in the fight against the Collectors, against the Reapers. I am surrounded by good people, and pleasant memories; and I wish for her to continue living, to continue thriving, after I am gone. I do not want her on the shore before her time. I will wait forever."

"I wish that… that you had more time with her."

"Siha gave me more time and use and memories than I ever expected, and it has been a great joy to be by her side. Like Irikah, she woke me up – a ghost, wandering the galaxy, until someone reached out and gave me a second chance. I'm sure you understand."

Yeah… Yeah. More than he knows.

"She will be well protected. Not just by fate, or my gods."

Thane stops to cough again. From the corner of my eye, I see an asari nurse glance his way, concerned for a few moments. She relaxes when he straightens up again and exhales, looking up at me. And I don't see fear, or doubt, or worry. I see trust, and acceptance, and love for his Siha.

Thane extends a hand to me. "Protect her, Archangel."

I grip it back, "Always, Thane."

It goes without saying: I will do what I can. I just wonder if I can do enough, in the end.