AN- One shot of a story I just couldn't get out of my head. I wrote this yesterday and proof read it this morning and only went over it once so I apologise for any errors!

DISCLAIMER – All characters belong to Richelle Mead and Vampire Academy.

Stay Stay Stay

A week. A whole damn week. Well a week and two days since the charm. Since I nearly gave my mentor my virginity. And still a part of me wished it was never removed. I wished I was still laid there, in his bed, with his weight on top of me. Whispering sweet nothings in my ear. Touching me in places I'd never been touched before.

I laid in my bed in my room, my mind on overdrive imagining the what if situation where he didn't rip that damn necklace from my neck. Where he had left it in place around my neck and done everything, I ever wanted him to do to me and my body. I knew that if he had I would have lost Lissa, so I am thankful it didn't happen. But damn if that part of my body wasn't wide awake with the need of his touch again.

Of course, training had resumed so we were still spending time together but nothing further was said. We didn't discuss the charm or the aftermath. What he said on the way to the clinic, after Natalie, swirled around in my head even now. If I let myself love you, I won't throw myself in front of her. I'll throw myself in front of you. He'd said. And I knew it was wrong in so many ways. Our duty was to the Moroi. To Lissa. To protect her. We couldn't risk putting our own wants before her life. She was too important. The last of her line.

She came first.

I sighed angrily into the darkness. My head was spinning in circles. I knew she came first. I knew we couldn't be together, but I just hated it. Seeing him every day was torture. What made it so much worst was that it didn't seem to bother him. He didn't seem to be affected by how close I got. His breathing never changed when I brushed up against him. He never faltered in anything he did. He was completely unaffected by my presence. It had been a week and he'd already forgotten all about me.

Each time I entered the gym for morning training I would stop and soak up the view. Him sitting back relaxed against the wall looking sexy as hell reading a western novel. Remembering the very vivid dreams I had had that night. Each night since the charm I had dreamt different things. Us going all the way being the most common. Another was me walking into the gym for training and him striding towards me and pushing me against the wall not giving me a second to even register what was happening before his lips crashed against mine and he took me right there in the middle of the gym. See why I needed to soak up the view of him in the mornings. After the first time having that particular dream, I'd entered the gym and he was already striding towards me. Part of me hoped my dream was a reality. Truth was I was just late again, and he started barking orders at me to warm up and start running.

So yeah, the dreams were not helping with the forgetting him part. Especially when he was the first face, I saw every day. Unless I bumped into another guardian on the way to training it was always him, I saw first. Always him I spoke to first.

Sighing into the darkened room for the millionth time I looked at the clock on my nightstand and decided I really needed to try and sleep. It was already well into the Moroi night and I had to be up early for my training. I turned onto my side and sighed heavily. Wishing for sleep to come quickly and hopefully have a peaceful night sleep for once, but I doubted it.

After a few moments I finally found a comfortable spot and relaxed. Starting to drift to sleep before I heard a key entering my door and the click of the lock being unlocked. The door handle squeaked as it was turned to be opened and light from the hall shown into the room, illuminating the room in a soft amber glow. Until a dark figure blocked the doorway. I knew from the persons position that they couldn't see me, so I risked opening my eyes further and relaxed instantly as I noticed the long duster I always associated with my Russian god.

I relaxed back into the pillow. Hoping I wouldn't be detected as actually being awake and my eyes drifted closed. The red beyond my lids faded back into darkness as he shut the door. I expected that to be it and that he had left the room until I heard the floorboard not far from my bed creek under his foot as he came closer. I stayed in my position. Eyes closed. Breathing softly appearing I hoped to be asleep.

''Rose? Roza. Are you awake?'' He whispered into the night. There was no way I was going to say I was awake. Not now. He knew as well as me that if I had been awake, I would have been yelling at anyone who came into my room uninvited. I knew I was actually awake, but it was Dimitri. I knew he wouldn't hurt me. So, no. I stayed quiet.

I felt the edge of the bed dip a little about midway as he perched on the edge. I risked a small movement and squinted through my eyes. Opening further when I saw Dimitri sat facing towards the door. Arms resting on his elbows he let out a loud sigh. I quickly shut my eyes again not wanting to risk him turning around and seeing me awake. He looked so defeated the way he sat. Head in his hands. If I didn't know better, he looked broken. He looked how I felt on the inside with all that hurt. I felt to bed shift again and then the feather light touch of Dimitris hand against my cheek. Moving a strand of hair out of my face.

''So beautiful. My beautiful Roza.'' He croaked out. He voice broke as he said the second beautiful and my heart broke at the same time. Until I realised what he had said. What? He just called me beautiful. I stayed perfectly still. Not wanting to break this spell. I knew I had to be asleep. There was no possibility this was real. He couldn't really be here. My mind was playing a cruel trick on me, right?

''I hate this. I hate pretending Rose. It's killing me. I know it's what needs to be done. That it's the right thing to do but it's killing me. I meant it. At the clinic. I meant what I said. If I let myself love you. I would protect you and not Lissa and that isn't right. But I don't know if I'll even be able to do the right thing now. Training you. Knowing that I am training you to potentially be killed. It's enough for me to want to throw in the towel and refuse. But I can't. I know I'm your best chance at surviving.'' He sighed again and his fingers returned to my cheek. Caressing it in the softest touch I had ever known.

''I'm so sorry it has the be this way.'' He continued. ''I wish. God do I wish it could be different. That we didn't have to live in service of others, but we do, and I know neither of us would give that up. You would never leave Vasilisa and I would never leave you. I know I should say I would never leave Vasilisa. I know that is the duty-bound thing I should say but I decided recently that I would put you both first. Everything I do here on out is to protect you both. I will push you harder than ever because I can`t bear the thought of living in a world without you in it. I wouldn't be able to live with myself knowing I didn't give you my all. And I will protect her fearlessly in order to protect you. Because I know you couldn't live in a world without her in it.'' He stopped talking as he voice began to waver again. After a few moments he took a deep breath and started talking again.

''I don't think my feelings will ever go away. They were there well before the charm but god have they intensified since then. I go to sleep every night dreaming of what could have been and then beating myself up every morning because I know it wrong. Inappropriate. I shouldn't be, can't be having these dreams and thoughts about my student. But I've never felt more alive than I do when I'm with you. You brought me back Rose. Brought me back after I lost Ivan. I feel more alive than I ever have done before and it's all because of you. Every day in training I want to take you in my arms and never let you go. Throw all the rules out the window and just hold you. But I can't, because you need to graduate and be assigned to Lissa. And that's all I'll get. To be your guarding partner. And if that's all I get, then its good enough for me. Just being that close to you every day. I can live with that. It will kill me, I know, but I'll do it. To keep you both safe. I just couldn't go another second without getting this out. I needed to tell you. Even the sleeping you. You had to hear this. God, I hope you don't remember this. You'll throw a fit and demand we find a way. I can hear you now. There's got to be a way comrade. You'd probably say.'' He chuckled. A rich chuckle which was nice to hear in his current state. I almost laughed as well because he was spot on. If fact I was seconds away from telling him that exact thing. I never knew I had this much self-restraint, but it was wearing thin.

''So yes, I'm thankful you are asleep. But I hope subconsciously you have heard what I have said and never ever think I don't care about you. Because I do. With my whole heart I care about you. You are the most important person in my life.'' He revealed. ''I just wish it could be different.'' And yet another sigh. ''One last time. Just one last touch.'' He whispered and I felt his fingers brush against my cheek again. What surprised me even more was when I felt his lips against my forehead. ''And one last kiss.'' He murmured against my heating forehead.

As his lips touched my forehead for another kiss. The wetness I felt slip next to the kiss was my undoing. His tear. I couldn't not. One last kiss. That's what he said. One last kiss. If this was our last kiss it wouldn't be a kiss on the forehead.

I moved my hand from my side at a lightning speed and pulled his face down to meet mine as I joined our lips together in a final kiss. And boy what a kiss it was. I pulled his whole upper body down towards me as the kiss progressed from the gentle caress into a much more passionate embrace. His hand that had been caressing my cheek wound its way into my hair and he grabbed a handful in a fist causing a moan from my lips. His other hand made its way down my body gripping my hip, pulling me closer to his body. I felt him shift and suddenly his whole body was pressed up against mine, pushing me down further into the mattress. I moaned loudly into his mouth at the contact and it was like a bucket of water was chucked on the both of us. We pulled apart and just stared at each other. His body was still pressed up against mind as our gazes remained locked together.

This was just meant to be a goodbye. One final kiss, but instead it felt so much more than that. It felt like coming home. We continued staring at each other as our breathing returned to normal. Dimitri was the first to break the silence.

''How long have you been awake?'' He asked. I looked away. Knowing he would be able to see the lie in my eyes when I said it. ''And don't lie. Please.'' He whispered and the raw emotion I heard in his voice made me tell the truth.

''Since the start. I think. I'm still not sure I'm actually awake.'' I admitted as I moved my eyes back to his and I could see the fear in them. The fear that I had heard everything. He moved off me and I instantly felt cold. I felt cold to the bone without his body on mine. He sat back at the edge of the bed staring at me. After the initial shock of his weight leaving me, I moved to a seating position also. ''It ok. I understand.'' I whispered as I reached out for his hand, which he pulled away from. That stung.

''So, no shouting?'' he asked, eyebrow raised.

''Oh, that was hard to not response to. You should be proud of my self-restraint their comrade. Because it took all my strength not to respond to that because damn right, I would say that. Then you just had to go and ruin the self-restraint I had didn't you.'' I muttered giving him the look. He smiled a little at that.

''You should have told me from the start you were awake.'' He murmured.

''And if I had would you of admitted all that to me? Told me how you really felt? I have to admit. It was some speech. I think that's the most I've ever heard you talk.'' I smiled.

''No, I wouldn't off.'' He admitted. ''But I needed to tell you. Even though I thought you wouldn't hear me I had to tell you. Get it out because it was eating me up.''

''I feel the same you know. I know it's wrong to. I understand. Everything you said. I get it. But it seriously sucks!'' I whisper yelled.

''It does indeed.'' He smiled sadly. ''But I promise you are actually awake. And that I'm actually here with you. For now.'' I smiled at him as he confirmed that. He'd heard what I'd said and was reassuring me. Even though this was killing us both he still wanted to reassure me the best he could.

An idea struck me then. I knew he would say no. But I just had to try. Had to take the possibility he would give me just this one thing. ''Can I ask you something?'' I whispered. Not wanting to look at him but also being unable to look away.

''What?'' he asked.

''Stay. Stay with me tonight. For one night. Then tomorrow we forget. We go back. Just stay. Please.'' I pleaded.

He was silent for a while. Looking at me as I sat there almost squirming under his gaze. I couldn't take it anymore and I broke eye contact, I looked down at my hands as they ringed together on my lap as I nervously awaited the rejection I knew was coming. ''One night?'' he surprised me by asking.

I looked up, meeting his gaze with newfound hope spiralling in my body. ''Just one night.'' I repeated. ''I just want you to hold me. To be held by you for a night. So, I can carry it with me forever. Because I won't ever forget you. But I hate not having a memory of you holding me that isn't controlled by the charm.'' I admitted shamelessly. It was one thing I hated about the charm. That the only memory I had of him was overruled by the fact it was not our decision. It wasn't our choice. It was a controlled interaction. I just wanted one that was entirely us. Just me and him. Alone.

''Okay.'' He agreed.

''Okay?'' I squeaked. Shocked he'd actually agreed to this.

''One night.'' He repeated it like a mantra. He stood from the edge of the bed and removed his duster. Hanging it on the back of my door then removing his shoes and placing them neatly at the doors entrance. He then headed back towards the bed. Towards me and I couldn't help but chuckle, causing him to raise an eyebrow.

''Comrade. You're in jeans. You are not going to be comfy sleeping in jeans. Take them off. It's not like I haven't seen it before.'' I mumbled the last bit low but not low enough for him not to hear it. His eyebrow rose even more, and he was about to say something before I interrupted him. ''I don't care what you have to say. You won't be comfy. You know it. I know it. Take them off. I'll turn around if it makes you feel better.'' I offered as I turned around in the middle of the bed looking at the back wall. I heard as his jeans dropped to the floor and he picked them up. Probably folding them and putting them on my desk chair. I stayed in position as I felt the bed dip beside me as he climbed in. Laying down beside me.

''You can turn around now.'' he said in a sheepish voice I had never heard from him before. He almost sounded shy. I turned back to face him and laughed out loud. His face was bright red and I don't know why I found it so funny. ''Are you laughing at me?'' he asked outraged.

''Yes. I am. You look so nervous. It's kind of cute.'' I admitted smiling at him. ''Calm down comrade. I'm not going to corrupt your soul.'' My smile grew wider. He shook his head at my antics and moved his arm nearest to me up above his head. He still had on his t-shirt. Which I for one was thankful for as I don't think I would have been able to sleep if he didn't.

''I thought you wanted me to hold you.'' He smiled back at me. Looking down at the empty space between us. I sighed as I moulded my body into his side. Resting my head over his heart and curling my body against his.

After a while of me just lying there against him and in silence I could sense the internal battle going on in Dimitri's head. Even without looking at him I knew he was fighting against what he knew was right and giving in to what he wanted. Eventually he gave in and his arm he moved earlier came to rest around my waist. Hugging me to his body. We both sighed at the feeling and I smiled against his chest.

We laid there. Not talking just taking in the feeling of being in each other's arms for the longest time. His hand around me was stroking small circles on my back and my mind was drifting to bad thoughts. Heat was pooling between my legs with every sweet touch.

I knew what I wanted. There was just no way he would allow it. So, I nuzzled his chest, pulling myself closer to his body as my mind drifted trying to form a plan. After a few minutes a sinister plan. A cruel plan formed in my head. I knew it was wrong. Wrong to play on his good nature but as I thought about it. I did in fact realise it was a valid fear of my own so wasn't it really wrong. It was a possibility. It could in fact happen and I knew that I would never allow it to be a reality. I just hoped he would never want it to be a reality either and help me.

''You know what I'm really scared off?'' I asked breaking to comfortable silence we found ourselves in. ''Other than never feeling this way about anyone else that is.'' His fingers were still stroking small soothing circles on my back which were sending shivers down by spine.

''What's that?'' He replied.

''Not being assigned to Lissa.'' I started but before I could continue, I was cut off.

''That won't happen. I won't allow it. You are the perfect person to guard Vasilisa.'' He whispered.

''I know it's unlikely with the bond. But if I wasn't. What happens if I get some arsehole male Moroi whose idea of having a female guardian is to serve them.'' I muttered shakily. I felt his hand still on my back and him pull me even tighter to his side.

''That won't happen. Because you'll be with Vasilisa.'' He repeated, fear clear in his voice.

''But what if it does? They might think all the bad in my record makes me unworthy to guard her. I don't want to go into that situation… t-the way I am now.'' I admitted, stuttering the last part as my nerves kicked in.

''The bond helps counter that. And since you've been back you've been nothing but on your best behaviour. Mostly.'' He chuckled, probably remembering the Jesse thing.

''This isn't a joke!'' I snapped, moving so I could look at him. I don't know what he saw there but he sobered quickly.

''Your right. I'm sorry. So, let's try and figure it out. What did you mean by the way you are now?'' he asked. Oh, he just had to ask that didn't he. I ducked my head back down, hiding it in his neck. Nuzzling my nose below his ear.

''I thought you knew. I didn't think you of all people would believe the rumours about me.'' I whispered. Luckily, I was near his ear so I knew he would hear me.

''Rumours about wha... Oh.'' He acknowledged as he suddenly realised what I was talking about. His whole body tensing.

''Yeah. So how are we going to figure that out?'' I asked, hoping beyond hope he would just offer.

''Rose.'' He groaned in exasperation. ''You know we can't.'' I had to give it to him. He was quick. My heart dropped at the rejection. I knew it was coming. I knew there was no way he would just offer but the rejection still stung.

''Just for one night. One night where we can be together. I just want one night.'' I begged. ''Why can't we just have one night? Why is this world so cruel!''

''Because...'' he started but cut himself off. I moved from my hiding spot and looked at him as he struggled with what to say. Our eyes met and I could see the battle in them. ''Because. If we did that. If I got to have you in every way. I don't think I could do my duty. I don't think I could let you go. I know that sounds controlling and demeaning, but your all I think about. If I got a taste, I wouldn't be able to help myself coming back for seconds.'' He admitted. The way he said taste sent heat straight to my centre and I squirmed. The action did not go unnoticed by Dimitri. His eyes darted to my lips and back up to meet my gaze as I saw them darken with lust. He was fighting an internal battle; one I didn't want him to win.

I knew what he was saying. He did sound controlling but damn if I didn't find it hot coming from him. I wouldn't let any other person try and control me but with him doing it. Yeah, I would let him. I quickly thought of a counter. In my own twisted mind, it reminded me he hadn't come right out and refused yet.

''Then we promise each other. We promise each other it would only be this once. Just to help me. Ease my worry. Then we go back to student and mentor then guarding partners. I just don't want some stuck up Moroi taking this from me without my consent.'' I admitted, looking into them lust filled brown depth, I felt like I would get lost. It wasn't just lust in them though. There was some concern and also a lot of anger showing through. I knew this was a sensitive subject for him. I knew I was playing on one of his fears for every woman to basically get what I wanted. But who wouldn't be scared of this? We all knew this happened. We all knew dhampir women were taken advantage of time and time again by their Moroi charges because they felt like they owned us. Like they controlled us in every way, and it was there right. They thought they were doing us a favour. Yet nothing was ever done. ''I want to give it to someone of my choosing. Someone I feel deserves it.'' Hook. Line. Sink. Or so I hoped. He groaned again, his eyes flicking towards my lips again as his tongue darted out licking his lips. The room was silent for a while longer and I could see the battle raging on beyond his eyes as he fought himself.

''К черту это. Одна ночь. Я обещаю. Простите меня.'' He whispered like a prayer looking up to the ceiling as he spoke the last words, just before his lips crashed onto mine. (Screw it. One night. I promise. Forgive me.) I had no idea what he just said and honestly, I didn't care. He was kissing me. Not just a goodbye kiss either. This was a proper, all-consuming kiss. Our lips moulded together perfectly. Like we were made for each other and in this moment, I was sure we had been. I moaned into his mouth as his hands travelled the length of my back, one resting against my lower back the other against my hip. He shifted me so I was laying directly on top of him, straddling him and I moaned again as I felt his hardened length against my belly. ''This is what you do to me.'' He whispered as his lips moved up and down my neck and I let out a small giggle. ''Oh, is that funny?'' He asked, pulling my lobe between his teeth and pulling causing another moan to slip from my mouth. God I was so happy no one else lived on this floor right now. There was no way I was going to be able to keep the noise down he was already making me feel so good.

''Nnn-nnoo.'' I moaned again. He released my ear and pulled back to looked at me. The bubble we were in broke for a few seconds as we stared at each other in awe. Well in my case it was awe. He was willing to do this. Against his better judgement and all the will in the world he was willing to do this for me. Just in case my fear became a possibility. And I loved him all the more for it. With that one thought I realised it was true. I meant it. I did love him. I would always love him. But this cruel world would never allow us to be together, so all we would get is this one night. This one magical night and I would make sure I got my fill of him. Shaking my head from my wayward thoughts my eyes focused back at the god beneath me. My hair had fallen around us as we stared at each other. Giving us a protective curtain and I smiled coyly at him. ''What did you say. Just before...'' I asked.

''You really want to know?'' I nodded. ''I said. One night. I promise.'' I don't know why but I felt like he was keeping something from me. Like that wasn't everything he had said.

''And I promise to.'' I replied, brushing my lips against his. ''One night.'' And I crushed my lips against his again. And with that one promise we were done talking. Our lips collided in and even more intense kiss than the last. His hands resting on my hips pulling my body closer to his. Pressing his harden length harder into my stomach. My core pushing further into his body, seeking any friction it could find as I squirm on his lap.

Suddenly the bed shifted and in a move that would blow the gods away I was suddenly on my back with him above me. And oh, what a sight it was from down here. Looking up at this god like creature who was looking down on me like I was the only women in the world and right now I felt like I was. I looked down his body. Taking it all in but I didn't get far when I realised, he still had on his t-shirt. Knowing what I'd thought not that long ago but right now sleep was far from my mind. I wanted him. And he wanted me, and we would finally get our wish. And it wouldn't be controlled by the charm. It would be just us. Just him and me. Like it always should have been.

My hands moved down his sides. Resting against the hem of his shirt as I slowly pulled it upwards. Scrunching up the fabric, until it was all bunched up. Dimitri moved and sat on his heels causing me to move into a seated position with him as I pulled to offending piece of fabric over his head.

As soon as it was free of his body my eyes drifted downwards. Over his sculpted chest and I reached out but hesitated just before I touched him as fear set it. I had no clue what I was doing. Is this the right thing to do? What if he didn't like being touched. What if he didn't want me to touch him. I looked up, meeting his gaze with my own and he must have seen the fear and apprehension in my eyes as he nodded. Silently telling me it was ok.

Without any further confirmation needed my hand reached further forwards and caressed his bare chest. His muscles rippled beneath my touch and I heard him suck a breath in as my fingers spread across his harden pecks. My other hand reached forward also as both hands moved to his sides. My gaze never wavered from his as my hands ran upwards towards his shoulders and pulled him gently back towards me into another passionate kiss.

I felt his hands come back to rest on either side of me. One hand slipping beneath my own shirt and he began lifting. I wasn't nervous but I shivered at the sensation which caused Dimitri to pull away and search my eyes. I gave him the same permission he gave me and with a nod he removed my own shirt. His eyes widened with surprise as he realised, I didn't have a bra on.

''No Bra. I approve.'' He smiled coyly.

''Yeah. Do you know how uncomfortable those damn things are to sleep in.'' I laughed as I pulled his lips back to my own. Leaning back all the way until my head rested on my pillow and I finally had his weight back over me. He smothered me in a long passionate kiss for another few minutes, but breathing was getting harder and harder and the need for oxygen won out as I moved my head to the side. This didn't stop him, he continued his sweet assault to my neck, suckling on a spot just below my ear which caused a breathless moan to echo around the room.

A hand caressed its way down my body, resting at my hip the other resting at the side my breast as he moved down my body. Kissing and suckling his way down my neck, across my collarbone to my upper breast. He looked up at me through his eyelashes and gave me a small smirk as he took one hardened nipple between his lips and sucked. Hard. A loud moan burst through my lips before I could control it as the sensation of his lips over the sensitive skin sent a shot wave of heat straight to my core, soaking my panties through and possible through my sleep shorts. I squirmed against his hold on my hip, trying to find any friction I could for my aching centre, and he pulled my nipple between his teeth and pulled slightly. He was quick to suckle to sting away and before I could even think about protesting about the neglect the other was getting, he moved and took that one in his mouth giving it the same treatment causing another loud moan.

In my distraction I didn't feel his hand near my hip move further down until I felt the waistband of my shorts pull tighter against my back and his hand slip beneath the band. I lifted my hands pulled his face back to my lips, not giving him the opportunity to close his mouth I thrusted my tongue inside his as we fought for dominance. As quickly as I kissed him, I pushed him away, sensing his hand in my shorts getting closer to where I wanted him the most, but I wanted the offending material off my body. I had a sudden urge to be bare before him. He stilled his movements, both his lips and hand as he looked at me. He pulled back completely taking me in as I moved to his hand next to my shoulder, taking it within one of mine and dragging it down my body reaching the edge of my short. He raised an eyebrow in silent question at what I meant, and I guided his hand to be with the other on the inside of my shorts and then pushed them down slightly. He got the message loud and clear and gripped the edges of the clothing, looking me in the eye as he pulled both my shorts and panties now my legs. He never broke eye contact with me as he threw the items of clothing. The final pieces covering my body into the corner of the room. I sat back up, and taking my own bravery reached forward for the waistband of his boxers, His length protesting the confides of them, my gaze never leaving his as I slowly started to pull them down. He moved quickly. To stand at the edge of the bed, I moved as well, kneeling before him on the bed, allowing me to push his boxers down and let them pool at his feet. He stepped out of them as his eye finally left mine and took the whole of my body in and I did the same. My eyes widened as I took him in. Took him in all his glory and damn was it some glory. How the hell was that going to fit inside of me. I gasped at the sight of it. He had to be bigger than average. Like much bigger.

His hand came up and tilted my head back up to his, forcing me to meet his gaze once again as his other hand caressed my naked flesh. ''Don't worry.'' He whispered. ''You expand too.'' I sincerely doubted I'd expand enough to fix that inside me, but I'll take his word for it. He had more experience than me. I risked another peek at the monster between his legs and looked back into his eyes. He must have still sensed some apprehension as he continued. ''We don't have to. You can say no.'' He said, stroking my cheek gently. I shook my head immediately. No, I wanted this. I want this. More than anything. I trusted him.

''No. I want this. I want you. I trust you. If you say that then I believe you. I just...'' I shrugged. ''Well how the hell is that thing going to fit inside of me.'' I whispered embarrassed at my own inexperience in front of this god.

''We work you up. That's how.'' He said. Work me up. What the hell did he mean by that?! For a split second I wished I wasn't as inexperienced as I was, but I shook the thought away. Knowing beyond reason I wouldn't want to experience anything like this with anyone other than Dimitri.

I tried. I really tried to raise an eyebrow, but I knew as soon as he laughed, I didn't succeed. ''Give it up. You can't do it. But to answer your silent question. This is how.'' He muttered before he lifted me from the bed, my legs instantly wrapped around his waist as his collided his lips once more to mine. I felt my back hit the softness of the bed once more as he laid me down and rested above me again. The only difference being this time we were both completely naked. He didn't linger long at my lips. Moving quickly down towards my neck, my collarbone and once again at my breast. Giving them similar treatment to what he did earlier causing me to moan once again however he moved on quickly. Kissing his way downwards.

It wasn't until he reached my stomach that I realised where his final goal was, and I reached out to stop him. No way was I letting him kiss me there. Finally, the nervousness I had been waiting for kicked in. I grabbed his hair, stopping him in his tracks. He lifted his head from the sweet kisses he was leaving on my stomach and looked up at me. ''Trust me. It will be worth it.'' He smiled. I looked at him unsure. Could I really let him do that? I knew people did. I've read about it and from what I've read its always been good for the women but is it really that good. I sighed. I guess there's only one way to find out. I nodded and laid my head back trying to hide my embarrassment from him as he returned to kissing my stomach. I shivered involuntarily as he started moving further down again and he stopped in his tracks. ''I don't have to. Just tell me no and I won't.'' He murmured against my skin. I shook my head, but he obviously didn't see.

''N-nno. Do it. I want you to.'' I mumbled shyly as his lips picked up the work again. He stilled against my stomach. Moving his lips upwards, back towards my breast. ''What are you doing?'' I stuttered.

''Making sure your comfortable. We can work up to that.'' He murmured against my nipple, once again taking it in his mouth but this time as he bit down a finger slipped between my lower lips and inside of me causing me to gasp in surprise but it was strangled by a moan as he curled the finger inside me and stroked. ''God. You're so wet.'' He groaned into my nipple. He soon added another finger inside, moving his body to rest on one side giving him better access to all of me. I was thrashing about as he picked up the pressure of his sucking and the ministrations of his fingers buried inside me. Just as I thought it couldn't get any better his thumb rested against the bundle of nerves hidden under the hair there. He pressed on it gently causing a shock wave of pleasure to ripple through my body and a scream to leave me lips. Between all of the sensations I was getting I was close to breaking. I had never felt this way before. A knot started forming deep inside my stomach and my whole body began to tense up as I felt close to my breaking point, yet he still didn't stop what he was doing.

I felt like screaming at him to stop but before I got the chance that knot snapped and I exploded. My vision blurred and the world aligned or so it felt like it did. I'm not even sure I didn't black out for a second but as I came back down from whatever high that was, I opened my eyes meeting Dimitris smirking face as he stared down at me. I could feel his fingers still softly caressing my insides as I came down from my high.

''How was that?'' He asked.

''Uh...'' I mumbled. ''I don't even have words.'' Was that really what I'd been missing. Wow. He chuckled in response as he brought his fingers up and took them between his mouth and sucked. I realised to late that they were the same fingers that had just been inside me. He was sucking my juices of himself and boy was that beyond erotic. The heat returned full force within seconds watching him and I squirmed again giving out a soft moan as I watched him suck his fingers again. Without thinking, I grabbed his hand and pulled it towards me, taking one fingers inside my own both and sucked the remainder of my orgasm off and moaned again. Yeah that was even more erotic. I smiled up at him and brought his lips to my own. Not expecting to taste myself on his lips, I moaned again.

''You taste fantastic.'' He murmured against my lips. Causing me to pull away from him. Why did I stop him before? WHY!

''You are fantastic. That was amazing.'' I whispered.

''It gets better than that. Trust me.'' He smiled. And I did. From here on out I would trust him. I would let him do what he wished, but I couldn't help but at least take some part of the lead as I grabbed his head between my hands and pushed him downwards back to where he was, where he wanted to go not that long ago. ''Are you sure?'' he asked, looking up from just below my breast which is all that I had managed to push him down to before he stop me. I just nodded my head and rested against the pillow. Waiting for the next blissful experience to come. I felt completely safe with Dimitri with me and that was the whole point. To share this with someone I trusted. Someone I loved.

Without any more encouragement needed Dimitri moved swiftly south. Giving me small quick kisses down my body. He paused just above the apex of my thigh taking a deep breath. ''I've imagined doing this to you more than I care to admit.'' He smiled up at me, gazing at me beneath his lashes with a wonderful cheeky grin on his face as he moved his lips that inch lower and collided with my already sensitive bundle of nerves, licking and suckling at the same time I had no idea how he did it and I didn't care as a course of pleasure shocked my body and my hips bucked of the bed. He moved an arm to rest over my hips, holding me in place as he gave me another lick, this time from my slit and finishing at the bundle of nerves, I tried squirming but his vice like grip wouldn't let me. As he continued his rhythmic sucking, licking and occasionally biting, my back arched on the bed. My hands found purchase in his hair pulling him closer to my core as my hips slow rocked along with his movements. The only movement I could get.

His other hand raised higher, taking one of my globes into it caressing and pinching the nipple between his skilled fingers. Between that and his skilled mouth I was brought to my second climax of the night as I screamed his name. Yeah definitely glad no one lives on this floor. I just hope the dorm matron isn't walking around up here otherwise we are busted because that was not quiet.

As I came back to myself, I once again opened my eyes to Dimitri gorgeous face gazing down at me. The only difference was this time his lips were glistening with my wetness. I smiled sheepishly. ''Sorry. I shouldn't have yelled that loud but damn that was amazing.'' I laughed.

''Lucky for us no one is patrolling this area tonight. Well, I was but my shift is over, and no one took over my patrol so.'' He replied.

''So that means I can be as loud as I like?'' I asked cheekily, grasping his shoulders with my hands pulling him closer to me. I wanted to kiss him. To taste myself again.

''No.'' he sighed exasperated. ''If anyone hears they will come and investigate and then well I don't think I need to tell you what would happen.'' He implored. I smiled and nodded.

''I'll try and be quiet. For you.'' I smiled.

''Trust me. I love hearing you. Hearing what I'm doing to you, but we can't risk being heard.'' I laughed at his admission. It made me feel warm all over. He wanted to hear me. I wonder what else he wanted to hear. I pulled him closer towards me. Thinking of something I would think any man would want to hear from a naked woman but not entirely sure how to put it. I leant my head up, resting my lips against his ear, taking his lobe between my teeth and pulling softly causing him to groan into my own ear.

''Enough talking and make love to me already.'' I whispered seductively into his ear as I squirmed at the thought. I could still feel his hardened length against the outside of my thigh and I moved my hand down between us, grasping the length in my hand and stroking softly eliciting a deep rumbled groan from Dimitri as he pushed me back so I was laying firmly on my back as he came to lay directly above me.

''Are you sure?'' he asked, once again searching my eyes. I knew without a doubt he wouldn't find any uncertainty in my eyes so I did the one thing I could think off. I opened my legs further to accommodate his large frame and smiled at him.

He brought his lips back to mine as he moved my hand away from his length. Taking it in his own hand I felt him move the impressive tip against my entrance, stroking it up and down my slit coating it in my own wetness. His tip came into contact with my clit as a strangled moan came from my lips as even more heat pooled at my core and finally, I felt him align himself with my entrance.

He grasped my chin, moving my head so I would meet his eyes and I gave him a small nod. This was it. I was finally going to do it and it would be with someone who I knew deserved it. Someone who by all means had made the entire experience magical and it wasn't even over yet. He nudged his way into my opening, pushing only the tip inside me as we kept our gazes locked on one another and a silent O formed on my lips and he stretched me. I quickly adjusted to the invasion and I nodded for him to continue. Grasping his shoulders tightly to keep me steady.

The pleasure cursing through my body was building quicker than before and I instinctively rocked my hips as the need to have him fully inside me wrecked my body. He pulled back as my hips went up to meet his as a focused look crossed his face. ''Slowly, Roza. Take it slowly.'' He murmured in a strained voice and I realised he was taking it slow for me and that this could very well be causing him physical pain to have to be this slow. He was doing this slowly for me, to avoid me any discomfort. I nodded in response and let him lead the rest of the way.

Suddenly I felt some resistance as he nudged forward again and he stilled, once again seeking my approval and consent. I smiled up at him until I realised what that resistance was, and my smile turned into a grimace. Shit. Lissa warned me about this. I just presumed it would already be broken from the amount of training we did. Crap, she said it hurt when the guy broke it. Oh god I didn't want it to hurt. I didn't want him to think he had hurt me. He's been so loving. I nodded in acknowledgment of what was to come and gritted my teeth, but Dimitri didn't move. He didn't make any move except to move his hand between us and his finger came into contact with my clit once more and he flicked it a couple of times and pure pleasure shocked through my body causing my already soaked core to be coated in another layer. Now I felt Dimitri move again, but he didn't more forward like I expected, he rocked his hips backwards, moved his free hand to caress my cheek and I could see the apology on his lips as he starred at me. I gave him a half smile and another nod as he continued playing with my bundle of nerves and he rocked his hips forwards, pushing himself further into me as I felt my barrier give out in a painful snap. I cried out as the initial pain shocked through my body, but it was swallowed my Dimitri's lips upon mine again, trying to take the pain away. After that he thrusted into me until he was at the hilt and I had taken all of him and he stilled once again. The pain subsided quickly and all I felt was a pleasure filled feeling. I broke the kiss and looked up at him and rocked my own hips backwards and then forwards silently telling him he could move.

Even now, he was gentle as ever. Slowing increasing the tempo to let me grow accustomed to the feelings his body was giving my own. The pain completely disappeared and soon the pleasure completely took over every nerve ending of my body. I moaned and moaned, trying to keep the noise down was a lot harder than it should have been but god the things he was doing to me was unbelievable. He rested both hands next to my shoulders. Giving himself leverage to rock his own hips in and out of me as my moans and his groans increase with the tempo of his thrust. I moved my legs, bring them up to wrap once more around his waist, using them to pull him closer to me. With this new position he was able to slip further into me and I cried out in pleasure.

''Yes! Yes! YES!'' I moaned as he lips covered mine. Swallowing my moans with his kisses. Maybe I was getting loud again. He moved his lips down my neck, biting and suckling as he went on. ''Faster. Harder. Please!'' I begged and he obliged. He lifted his head, capitating me once again with his gaze as he picked up the pace. Ploughing into me at a speed that must be unknown to mankind, but boy did it feel amazing. I moaned softly as his lips took one of my nipples into his mouth again. I felt the now familiar knot forming in my stomach ready to snap any second now. ''YES!'' I shouted as he bit down and pulled my already painfully erect nipple between his teeth the knot did exactly that. It snapped and I screamed out in pleasure. Not as loud as I wanted to. Oh, I could have been so much louder.

''Roza. Oh Roza!'' Dimitri murmured lowly against my nipple. I felt him move a few more times inside of me until I felt him pulsate and explode within me. Leaking his seed, cooling my hot core down immensely.

We laid there, still joined together in the best way possible, gazing at each other as we came down from our highs and I smiled widely up at him. ''Wow.'' I murmured as he moves off of me, pulling out. I felt a small twinge and grimaced a little but other than that I felt fine. ''That was. Wow.'' Yeah. Me. Rose Hathaway was speechless.

''Well if I knew this was all I would have to do to get you to shut up. I'd have done it a long time ago.'' He muttered against my shoulder as he kissed along it, I felt his smile against my skin.

''Shut up!'' I muttered slapping him away. He rolled onto his back softly chuckling to himself as I rolled and crossed my arms against his chest resting my chin on my arms staring up at him. ''Does it always feel this good?'' I asked, letting my inexperience seep through once again.

''I can honestly say I have never experienced anything close to that before.'' He murmured and I looked away. Was it not good for him? Was I that bad? ''No. Don't think like that. I meant that, that was the best experience I've ever had. You were amazing.'' He implored, pulling my face up to meet him in a soft gentle kiss. It was over before it could heat up further. Both of us pretty exhausted. As we broke the kiss a gracious smile graced his face as he looked up at me.

''Really?'' I asked, still insecure.

''Without a doubt, the best ever. And before that mind of yours starts spiralling there hasn't been that many.'' I looked at him and I knew he knew what my next question was going to be. So, he answered before I could ask. ''Three. Including you. So, two others. And neither of them even comes close to you. You were wonderful. And Sexy. And beautiful. And..'' he trailed off as a look crossed his face.

''And?'' I asked wanting him to continue.

''And I love you.'' He admitted. ''I know I shouldn't. I know it's wrong and it's dangerous, but I don't think I can stop myself. Even if I tried. And I tried but I didn't work. I love you Roza. I've loved you I think since to moment I met you.''

I smiled down at him. Tears forming in my eyes as I looked into the eyes of the man I loved and the man who loved me but couldn't be with and I could think of only one thing to say. The one thing that would complicate everything. ''I love you too.'' I whispered and I leant in a stole another kiss from him as a tear slipped from my eye. When I pulled back his hand was already there, ready to dry my tears away and I rested my head against his chest. In a similar position as earlier. Head resting above his heart and his arm around my waist stroking soft circles on my back lulling me to sleep.

He broke the silence quickly with a chuckle. ''I thought you weren't going to corrupt me?'' he asked, and I laughed out loud as I remembered what I said to him to get his pants off.

''Well I didn't plan to. It just sort of came to my mind as we were laying here.'' I whispered.

''Promise me something.'' He murmured into my hair. I nodded against his chest. ''If you don't get Vasilisa and you do get assigned to some loser Moroi who tries to take advantage of you.'' He shivered as the words left his mouth and I pulled myself closer trying to give him comfort. ''Don't let him without a fight. And if he does you call me. I'll come and get you straight away and probably kill the guy in the process.'' He admitted.

''Not unless I kill him first.'' I joked but deep down we both knew we were probably serious. ''But I promise. I will do everything in my power to make sure you are my one and only. Because I don't think anyone would ever come close to that. That was love in the rarest form. I'll never find that again.'' I admitted giving his chest a kiss as his arms tighten around me again.

''Me too, Roza. Me too.'' He sighed sadly and I felt another tear leak from my eye as I realised this was all we got. This one night. We only got this one night to be together. I sighed. Pushing the tears away, begging to stay awake so I could appreciate the time we had left. I didn't want to waste one second of our time together like this, but my body was spent from the rigorous exercise it had just been put through and all the emotions going through my head.

My last thought before sleep took me was, we couldn't go back. Even if we wanted to. I doubted we would be able to keep our promise to each other and only have this one night. I think we would be destined to keep having these one nights until we finally gave in. But one thing was for sure. We could not do this again before I graduated. It was way too risky and I was way too loud. A small chuckle left my lips before I succumbed to the darkness and I was unsure whether or not Dimitri heard it.

AN- What did you think?

New chapter of Invisible Strings soon. I'm hoping to have it done in the next few days but don't hold me to that! I've just had a mild case of writer's block. I know where I want the story to go. But I feel the chapter I'm writing is just regurgitating it from the book but changing some bits slightly so I'm just trying to figure out a way to get it where I want it by the end of this chapter and pick up the next chapter with the rest of the story if that makes sense?