A/N: This has been written for Kinktober 2021 and today's prompts are Pegging & Stuck in a Wall ✨ Due to the nature of this challenge, I've only done the most cursory of proofreads.
Content Warnings: dubious consent and a general warning for the fact that this almost certainly qualifies as crack fic.
Today is a good day.
"Oh, this is too perfect," Ino makes absolutely no effort to keep the amused glee from her voice.
"You have got to be kidding me," Suigetsu's voice is full of despair, for once she can't even accuse him of being dramatic.
He's well and truly wedged into the hole he's tried to crawl through. She should probably ask why. Or, call the fire department.
"Are you going to help me, or are you just going to stand there laughing?" he demands.
"I'll help," Ino promises. She'll help herself, at the very least. "Just hold on, I'll be back in a minute."
"Where the hell are you going?!" The outrage in his voice is an absolute delight. He doesn't stop yelling when she leaves, but she doesn't bother paying any attention. She only lives a couple of blocks away, this should take no time at all.
The thing about Suigetsu is he's one of the better hook-ups Ino has going, but he's also a complete prick. There's nothing to be done about his personality, but she can, at least, make a point.
"Let's make a deal."
"I hate it when you make that face, you know," he grumps, "name one good thing that has ever happened to me when you're making that face."
"How about one that's about to, instead?"
She pulls the strap and attached toy out of her bag and dangles it in front of his face.
"Absolutely fucking not."
"Come on," she wheedles, "you love it when I stick a finger-"
"That's completely different-"
"It's really not-"
"When I get out of here-"
"Which is going to be when, without my help?"
He starts to speak and cuts himself off with a noise of great frustration. It's too easy, Ino thinks. Winding him up when he can't walk away is easily the most fun she's had in ages. Hopefully, soon to be topped.
"So, what? You'll get me out of here if I let you stick that thing inside me?"
"Of course not," Ino faux-gasps, "I would never extort you like that. Since you're stuck here, though, I am going to propose a trade while you actually have to listen to what I'm saying."
They come to an agreement which Ino might regret later on, but for the time being, it's a delight.
"Alright, come on, hurry up and get me out of here," Suigetsu wiggles, aiming for insistent and mostly just looking ridiculous.
"Oh, no, baby, do you think I don't know you?" Ino is well aware that if she gets him out now he'll slip right through her fingers, deal forgotten. "We're doing this here and now."
"Excuse me?"
"Fair is fair."
"We're in public! That's-"
"Kind of like at Shikamaru's party last summer?"
"Well, that was-"
"Or maybe like Chōji's barbecue, at the end of the semester?"
"Okay, that hardly even-"
"Oh, no, I know! It's just like-"
"Alright! I get it, point made. Just get on with it, then."
"Purple really is your colour, you know?" The wet slide of the silicone against his skin really is quite lovely, she thinks.
"I hate you so fucking much, you know?" He mimics. She doesn't miss the breathlessness laced throughout the mocking tone.
Satisfaction fills her chest when she catches the groan the toy pushes from him on its way in.
"Like that?" She teases.
"Shut up."
If she's honest, she hadn't really expected this whole thing to turn her on. She'd mostly been thinking a little role reversal might make him a more considerate partner, but seeing the way his knees struggle not to buckle, taking in the little grunts, moans, whines that escape him the further towards the edge she pushes, it's not half bad. A girl could get used to this, she thinks to herself.
The only real loss, here, is that she doesn't get to see the face he makes when comes. They'll just have to do it in front of a mirror, next time.
When she comes around the other side, she doesn't have to tell him what to do and it's a great reminder of why they keep doing this, in the first place. He grabs her hips and pulls her close enough to get his mouth over her, no hesitation. She rewards him by tugging at his hair the way she knows he likes, it's not exactly a chore.
Somehow, they're both more keenly aware of the fact that they're still in public while they struggle to get him un-wedged than they were while they were half-naked.
"It's undignified," she insists.
"That doesn't make any fucking sense."
"You don't make any fucking sense," she retorts.
He mimics her, she mimics him, and things devolve from there. Ino tells herself she enjoys it less than she really does.
She still ends up calling the fire department just to laugh at the spectacle he makes.
A/N: Honestly, I have no explanation for this one. The idea popped into my head and I found it too hilarious not to write. Enjoy
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