One morning, John Phoenix woke up and turned on the news.
"Dylanvirus Outbreak in London! Everyone quarantine yourselves or we're all gonna die!" said the TV.
"How terrible," said John Phoenix. "I love working because I am a hero who saves people and it's so easy but I cannot put myself and others at risk, so I shall not go to work."
"By the way, people in America" said the news. "All people to go to work immediately, even the unemployed."
"What" said Phoenix Wright, John Phoenix's uncle. "That's not right, let's stay at home because we'll make everyone sick."
"UNCLE PHOENIX YOU IDIOT!" shouted John Phoenix and then he pulled a listening device out from under the cushion.
"Who was listening in on us," said Phoenix but his question was answered by the pounding on the front door.
"Phoenix Wright and his nephew John Phoenix, come out with your hands in the air!" shouted Detective Fulbright.
"No!" said Phoenix.
"RESISTING ARREST! YOU'RE GOING TO JAIL! INJUSTICE WE TRUUUUUUST" shouted Bobby, banging on the door.
Phoenix was about to go to the door like the imbecile that he was, but John Phoenix grabbed him and opened the window.
"John Phoenix no! We can't run away, that's illegal" said Phoenix.
"It is also illegal to not go to work today but that doesn't make it right," said John Phoenix.
"You are right," said Phoenix. He was impressed at John Phoenix's ability to differentiate between law and morality.
They jumped out the window and Fulbright broke the door down.
"NO! Who could have foreseen this?" yelled Fulbright and he took out his phone.
"Boss, they're on the run!"
John Phoenix and Phoenix left the alleyway only to be swarmed by police cars.
Then the cars made way for a special car that drove through them and then a very unimportant looking man stepped out.
"Phoenix Wright, we have you surrounded, give up and go to work," said the president of the United States, Phil Hawks.
Blind man that he was, he did not notice that Phoenix and John Phoenix had escaped! Because you see, the police formed an unbreakable barrier that not even John Phoenix could break, but that was broken when Phil Hawks drove in, because they had to make room for him. In that moment, John Phoenix took that chance to get him and Phoenix away.
"Fuck, where did they go?" yelled Hawks. "We must catch them, they can not take the month off because of the fake virus!"
"They went that way," said a man in a disguise, pointing down the street.
"OKAY BOYS, GET PHOENIX WRIGHT!" shouted Hawks and they drove down the road.
The man in the disguise then took off his coat revealing it was John Phoenix and Phoenix Wright stacked on each other.
"Okay, let's hide" said Phoenix, only for him to get pummelled to the ground by John Phoenix for yet another idiotic outburst.
"Uncle Phoenix, Phil Hawks has the whole country looking for us, we can't hide forever!"
"Then what do we do?"
"We must somehow follow their orders without putting the whole world at risk... and we must do that by ending Dylanvirus for good!"
John Phoenix and Phoenix broke into an inconspicuous looking car.
"Drive, motherfucker" said John Phoenix to the driver, and he took them to Ema's house.
"Ema, we need to cure Dylanvirus, can you help us" asked John Phoenix.
"Okay!"
John Phoenix, Phoenix and Ema went down to her hidden lab where she did lots of sciencey experiments.
"Okay, Dylanvirus can be cured by sprinkling yourselves with Hyde-fluid."
"What's Hyde-fluid?" asked Phoenix.
"Hyde-fluid is water from outside Cape West Apartments in New York," said John Phoenix.
"Yeah, that's right," said Ema.
"But how do we give this to everyone in the world?" said Phoenix.
"Uncle, SHUT UP," said John Phoenix. "We must spray it from the highest point in America which is the White House!"
John Phoenix and Phoenix went to the white house disguised in Phil Hawks hats so they didn't know it was them.
They walked into the throne room where Hawks was sitting watching millions of TVs that showed camera footage of the whole America because he really needed to find Phoenix and John Phoenix or the economy would crash and he'd lose all his money.
"Get out!" said Hawks. "This is a private room!"
"We need to get on your roof-" said Phoenix.
"NO!" shouted John Phoenix, because Phoenix gave their plan away, and Hawks was just about smart enough to catch on.
Hawks summoned the guards and they grabbed Phoenix, which made his hat fall on the floor revealing his stupid hair.
Phil Hawks jumped to his stubby little feet!
"PHOENIX WRIGHT I'VE GOT YOU AT LAST" yelled Hawks, and he and he blocked the door to the roof.
"Phoenix you idiot, this is your fault" said John Phoenix.
"You little pests," said Hawks. "Did you really think you could defeat the fake virus?"
"OBJECTION" shouted John Phoenix and he took out a camera. "Ha ha! I knew you would be so brazen as to admit Dylanvirus was a conspiracy, and now everyone will know for sure!"
"WH-WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT" screamed Hawks.
In his distraction John Phoenix and Phoenix ran past him and up to the roof.
"That was a good idea to stand up to him so he'd let his guard down," said Phoenix.
They set the water sprinkler on the roof and sprayed it into the skies.
"No, stop him!" shouted Hawks, but it was too late, Hyde fluid rained around the world and it cured everyone.
The next day, John Phoenix went to work and turned on the news. News had reached the world of how Phil Hawks manufactured Dylanvirus, though it remained unclear who helped him create it. It would likely remain unclear, too, because it turned out there was one part of the world the rain could not reach from the top of the White House and that was inside the White House itself. Phil Hawks had died to Dylanvirus and everyone celebrated.
The End.