Chapter Fifteen: A Gypsy Wind is Blowing Warm Tonight (Maybe my favorite chapter I have ever written)

Jarrod left the courthouse after the words he had with Elizabeth. He rode Jingo, hard. Harder than the older horse should have been run. He finally sensed that Jingo was tired and he pulled over for some water and grass. He himself could not think clearly. He got back on his rested horse and ended up at his Father's and Beth's graves.

He sat down between the graves and cried for the very first time for either of them.

"Son, men don't cry, EVER." resounded Tom's memory as he had Jarrod put down his first horse at age 12. He re-lived that horse's last look in his eyes still to this day. He dried up those tears that day and they never fell again...

And now he sat on the ground, in turmoil over a woman that challenged him as he had never been challenged before. Jarrod thrived on being the oldest, the one in charge, the wise brother. He was never impulsive or reckless or extemporaneous. The only time he had been with Beth and then, look at what happened then.

It had frightened him when he picked her that rose. He wasn't sure why he did it except he wanted to. The look in her eyes was beautiful and he wanted to take her in his arms. Then he heard the words in his head, made his excuses, and went into the house. Then he was chagrined for the way he left her in the garden. He avoided her the rest of the day. And then when he entered her room, the rose stared back at him from the vanity.

And that kiss in the corral. He wanted to chase her down but he couldn't force himself to move. By the time he got his wits about him, he could only watch her shapely derriere leave.

And he knew well to slack his lust. Lust had nothing to do with Elizabeth. She was a heady mix of love and passion to him. He wanted to protect her and Camellia. He wanted her to fix his coffee every morning and refill her evening wine. Her past made no difference to him. Why would she think it did? I told her all about Heath. Why did she not believe him?

And he stayed at their graves way past dark. Just thinking.

Elizabeth tried to hold together her emotions on the ride home as best she could. Was he afraid of her reputation, damaging the Barkleys? How dare he try to convince her to settle when it was his family she was fighting for? He sees me as … his client? Yes, I know I am not marriageable. I accepted that long ago but to put me aside so easily? I should have never told him about Camellia. Oh God, I shouldn't have kissed him. He probably was reminded of my wantonness. I wish I could leave the ranch tonight but it isn't safe for Camellia and Isabella. Monterey is calling me. Why did I let myself fall in love with Jarrod? I have known better the whole time.

"Elle, can we talk?"

She rolled over and faced Isabella. "Yes", through her tear-stained eyes.

"Oh Elle, what's wrong? I can count on one hand how few times I have seen you cry."

She cut her off. "No sister, there is nothing that can be done. Make sure your trunks are ready to leave as soon as tomorrow. I want to get to Monterey as soon as we can."

Isabella started to cry, "What about Heath?"

Elizabeth changed her gruff tone, "Of course, he can visit us when we get settled and you can write to each other. You know we can't live here permanently."

"I know. I just have enjoyed myself so much and we have gotten to know each other so well seeing each other every day and ..."

"I am sorry. I don't know what else to say."

"Elle, what is going on with you and Jarrod? You can tell me."

"Nothing, absolutely nothing. Please leave me alone now. It's not you, I promise. I just need to be alone to rectify things in my head. Can you have Camellia sleep in the nursery? She loves it and I don't want her to see me so out of sorts. Please…"

Isabella leaned over and kissed her sister on the forehead. The strongest person she ever knew seemed very broken.

Heath was waiting for her when she came downstairs. She had tears in her eyes. "Oh Heath, I don't know how to help Elle. She says we are leaving immediately after the trial and that could be as soon as tomorrow."

He kissed her on the top of her head and led her to the verandah.

"Bella, It may help you, my songbird, to tell me what you can if you can. If you can't, I would just like to hold you."

Isabella leaned into his strong arms and shared her heart about Elle. She told him about Camellia's father and how Jarrod had been so good to her despite her past. She told her how unworthy Elle felt and how she thought men looked at her. She thought Elle was falling in love with Jarrod but worried she only thought herself mistress material…SOMETHING happened at the trial between them, she just knew it...

Heath just listened and listened. He had his suspicions himself and Isabella just confirmed them. He had watched Jarrod when he thought no one was looking; he was in love with the woman. He saw him leave angry from the trial before lunch. It wasn't like him to not see the proceedings through. He recognized Elizabeth's feelings of low worth from what he saw Leah go through.

"Bella, just between you and me, I think Jarrod needs Elizabeth as much as she needs him. He has been lost for a long time. Beth's parents, the Randalls really messed him up blaming him for her death. He already took it to heart with it being Cass Hyatt and he lost his mind, tracking him down to a place called Rimfire to kill him. Me and Nick got there in time to stop him from doing something he would regret more. Then, those folks showed up and wanted her body dug up and taken back to Pennsylvania with them. He said "no" rightly so him being her husband and all. They shouted vile things as they left the rail station to go home. I know they were grieving too but it just about killed my brother too. Her father laid some kinda curse on him about ruining another woman's life like he did their daughter. Of course, none of us knew it happened until he had already left for New York. People in town ended up telling us all the gory details. Me and Nick have never known how to talk to him about it."

"Oh, Heath, that's awful. Poor Jarrod and ...poor Elizabeth."

" I know Bella, I know" and he pulled her closer.

"What if this is our last night together since we might leave tomorrow?"

"Oh sugar, it won't be. Even if you do go, I know how to get to Monterey and I plan on having you by my side for a very, very long time. Bella, I love you."

"I love you, too Heath Barkley"

And he leaned in and kissed her deeply as never before. His earlier kisses had been tender and almost chaste. His kiss parted her lips and took charge of her emotions. He held her back firmly and pressed himself against her in such a way that she never imagined. She wanted to stay this way forever in his arms. Heath could tell the difference in her breathing and knew they better stop before he couldn't. She had no idea what she was stirring in him.

"Heath? Heath?" He pulled away as heard Victoria calling. They calmed their breathing and went back in.

"I am sorry to bother you and Nick but do you have any idea where Jarrod is? I am getting worried that something has happened to him. No one has seen him since early afternoon at the courthouse."

"I will get Nick. I have a few ideas."

He told Nick what he knew and what he suspected. Nick agreed. He had seen the same things going on between the two of them.

Nick told Heath, "I ain't never planned on getting involved in one of y'alls romances but here I am twice in one week. I am a regular old Cupid."

Heath laughed. "I admit I never wanted you to but that pool-playing shenanigan you pulled the other week worked out just fine."

They rode towards the graves. Heath just had one of his feelings. Nick too…...

Jarrod was saddling Jingo back up as he heard the riders. He reached for the small gun in his suit pocket. He heard Heath and Nick call out for him. He responded. "Over here".

"Mother has us out playing nursemaids. We figured we better find you before she does." Jarrod laughed at Nick.

Nick pulled out his flask, "You look like hell."

"Thanks, I finished mine a couple of hours ago." as he took a drink.

"Want to talk?" asked Heath.

How do they always know… the same way you know when they need you…

Nick grabbed some scrub and began a campfire. He dug out an area by the rocks and pulled out his flint from his saddlebag. He lit his cigar from the small flame and leaned back.

Heath took a swig from Nick's flask and passed it back to Jarrod.

Nick started, "What do you think they are going to do with this moral turpitude charge? Sounds like a fancy lawyering term for gossiping."

Jarrod replied, "Yep it is. I assume they are going to bring up rumors about Camellia's father and paint Elizabeth as some immoral woman. I tried to talk to her today about it and maybe take the offer but she refused...quite angrily I may say. And it got worse after that. I left because she made it clear she didn't want me there."

"Women...can't live with them or without them. Who can figure them out?" Nick took another swig.

"You think Jarrod, she took that as maybe you don't believe in her and didn't want to keep helping her?" Heath took a long drag off his rolled cigarette.

Jarrod looked startled. "Why would she think that? She knows how I feel. I don't want her to get hurt."

"I am sure you have talked all this out. She told you about Camellia's father, right?" Heath bluffed going on what Bella told him.

Jarrod didn't answer. He hadn't been very forthcoming about Beth while she had told him everything.

"I haven't been out here in a few months. I used to come a lot before Katarina and the babies. She kinda answered a lot of questions for me that Father couldn't. He was a good man, yes a great man but he wasn't right about everything. Took me a while to quit living under his shadow." Nick commented in a mellow voice.

Heath and Jarrod both turned to look at Nick; they had never heard him say anything like that.

"What? Don't act like the old man's ghost doesn't hang over your heads too. You know, you have thought about it too."

Neither responded but they knew exactly what he meant. The crickets and the cicadas seemed to be in unison as they all listened.

"Mother comes out here all the time and tends both of the graves. It's a pity none of us got to know Beth very well."

Jarrod nodded. He didn't even know her as well as he knew Elizabeth after a month. Beth talked more about the house and the china pattern than anything else the last few days.

The solitude continued with each brother lost in his thoughts.

"Y'all know Nick has his gypsy stories along with a really great bandana—-" Nick hmphed at Heath.

Heath continued, "I spent some time with them myself. Do you believe in curses? "

"Yep, I don't have to believe in them. I hear them every day with the men and at the saloon. Think I have slipped a few myself." Nick laughed loudly.

Jarrod laughed, "I think Mother first washed your mouth out around the age of six, Nick. Do you remember?

"How can I forget? I still shudder around soap to this day". They passed the flask again and Jarrod lit his cigar.

"Well, the Gypsies used to use magic words to curse people. I asked one time about it. They said words have the power to destroy you if you let them. It didn't matter what words you used, if you believed them, they would serve the purpose. I think somebody cursed Elizabeth calling her worthless for having a child on the wrong side of the blanket. She believed them. I saw it in my Mama too. She wouldn't lift her eyes up in church because of a preacher that called her a whore."

The men were quiet, still listening to Heath's story.

"Bella said that after she buried her Papa and John, they weren't welcome in the church they grew up in. Preacher said, "Elizabeth caused people to gossip."

Both Jarrod and Nick let out expletives on that one.

"They go to the mission church with the dockworkers, sailors and former slaves, now"

"She told me that story when we were headed to church last Sunday. Said Elle, that's what she calls her, was scared to death to go with us. I bet she was really spooked after that scene in court today. I am kinda proud of her for not bolting and taking the money and the offer."

"I told Bella about how I came to the Valley. I called myself the Barkley bastard. She got onto me real good for saying that. I guess I heard it for so long in my head, I just let it take hold. I promised her I would try to not say it anymore. Kinda like a gypsy curse word."

"I guess we all got a Gypsy curse in our heads, right Jarrod?"

Jarrod didn't answer; he bit his bottom lip and sighed. "How do you do it, little brother?"

"Cuz I didn't get my head filled up with all that book learning" and he smiled that crooked grin.

Nick stood up, "Better be getting back, Katarina will be missing me." and he winked naughtily.

"And Heath will be needed to take that nightly walk with his redhead by the corral, the place you can't see from the house if you know what I mean?"

Heath laughed, "Thanks for reminding me."

Jarrod looked at his brothers and said "Thank you" humbly, and grabbed Jingo's reins.

Everyone was settled in their rooms when the brothers got back to the ranch and they all went to retire. Tomorrow was going to be an exhausting day in court.

Jarrod stood at Elizabeth's door and listened for any sign she might still be awake. He didn't and there was no light under the door. It will have to wait until tomorrow.