Canadian Po "DAAAAAAAAAAAAAANG Monkey, you got the sauce"

Monkey, wearing hi brand new Supreme box logo hoodie "Thanks Canadian Po, I bought it with my dragon warrior cash"

Canadian Po "How you making this much money as the dragon warrior? I didn't think it had a very high salary, and with taxes at all all time high and the dollar not doing so well, it seems like you should have mad racks"

Monkey, looking smug "I pretty much like, used my dragon warrior powers to like, rob a bank."

Canadian Po, jaw on the floor "MONKEY! THATS NOT OK!"

Monkey "And if you tell anyone, you cellulite bear, I'm goona kill ya"

Canadian Po "Gah Gah Goooooooy, plz dont kill me Monkey!"

Monkey, still lookin' drippin' "Yeah, thats what I thought you fat tub of goo"

Canadian Po "Y'know monkey, robbing banks is against the law, but you should really be careful how you talk about peoples weight. its very disrespectful and you could hurt some ones feelings. And that, is the ultimate crime"

Monkey "What, you dont think you deserve to get teased because youve put zero work into your body and now your a huge ball of fat that cant even find tighty whiteys that fit?"

Canadian Po "I am beautiful Monkey, and nothing you can say will change my mind."

Monkey "I know, I know. Beauty is on the inside"

Canadian Po "No Monkey, I am beautiful on the outside. I have decided that despite the fact I refuse to put any effort into my appearance, I am just going to call myself beautiful, and act mad whenever anyone disagrees with me. So guess what Monkey, I AM OFFENDED!"

Monkey "Ghasp! The O word"

*The life slowly leaves monkey. He had offended someone, and that is the ultimate crime. There is nothing worse than this. Monkey had observed that Canadian Po was a fat tub of goo, and this was wrong. He should have never even thought those things. Canadian Po is beautiful just the way he is, and anyone that disagrees should have the life sucked out of them and their corps peed on and disgraced. There is no excuse for fat shaming. No Excuse.*

Monkey, with his final breath "I'm sorry, I should have never tried to question that everyone, even the fattest tub of goo, is beautiful"

Canadian Po "Its to late monkey, there is no forgiveness in this life. you offended me, so forever you will be canceled."

*Monkey died. Canadian Po is quick to urinate all over his corps, shame to all who fat shame"

300 Pound Tigress walks into the room. "Canadian Po! What happened? Why is monkey dead?"

Canadian Po "He fat shamed me, and it hurt my feelings. I felt offended 300 Pound Tigress"

300 Pound Tigress "Well Canadian Po, if he offended you, he deserved to die. Lets leave his corps here for others to urinate all over, and lets go do something together. Just two fat people who refuse to acknowledge that we are fat because of our lazy unhealthy lifestyles, not because of genetics."

Canadian Po "That sounds good 300 Pound Tigress. What should we go do?"

300 Pound Tigress "Lets go to the gym Canadian Po, I know it will seem hard at first, but after a short while it will become easier and we will begin to eel healthier, and also feel better about our selves. Then maybe we wont have to wear tshirts when we go hot tubbing."

Canadian Po "You really think we could work out together and lead a better life together? You really think we could feel healthy and look attractive?"

300 Pound Tigress "Haha, of course not. Lets go home, crush a 12 pack of hot pockets and watch some friends. Then we can just scream at people that we are hot. Duh"

The moral of the story is, even if someone is a fat tub of goo, you should say anything mean. you shouldn't even think anything mean. You should always call really fat ugly people (Or Kungfu Pandas) attractive and compliment them on their disgusting shapeless bodies. And if you leave a comment telling me this story wasnt good, Ill be offended. SO JUST DONT!