Please keep in mind this story is AU. It follows the lives of Hopper and Joyce during their childhood, teenage years and eventually to when they are adults.
Story is rated M for violence, sexual content, attempted rape and child abuse.
Originally posted on AO3. Username: Unfable and Co-Written with a friend.
An outcast. That was what Joyce Horowitz was defined as. That girl, that one girl who always had her camera in hand or a book at her nose and no friends by her side. Her teachers adored her. She constantly made good grades, was praised for her good manners and her astounding work for the yearbook. However, the story that is perceived out in the open is usually a completely different book at home. The single-wide trailer her abusive father's shitty salary provided was more like the chamber of a gun, a cold piece of steel just waiting for a bullet to rip through it.
Jim Hopper was Joyce's polar opposite. Captain of the wrestling team, the most popular guy in school. Every girl at Hawkins High wanted to catch his eye. He lived on his family farm, helping out more than he should when his father had to pull a double shift at the station. His home life and school life were in perfect sync. He was loved not only by his family, but by his peers as well. Most of all he was loved by his best friend, Joyce.
Jim had become Joyce's rock. Her safe place when shit hit the fan and she couldn't have loved the man any more than she already did. Jim was a beacon of light in her dark and miserable life. The one man who could see past her baggy clothes, second-hand books and the bruises she attempted to hide.
He had a future and she wouldn't allow him to ruin that because of her reputation. It was the main reason she'd always told him no. The main reason she tried to avoid him in the halls and why she asked to be seated up front in classes they shared. Was she crazy for constantly turning away the most popular guy in school? Absolutely, but the need to protect him outweighed her need for happiness. He couldn't be seen in public with someone like her.
However, that didn't last. Before long, Hopper was breaking every rule in the book that Joyce had put in place for them. To not only protect herself, but to protect him too. He had gotten better at finding her in the crowded halls between classes. Always finding her secret hiding spots for lunch. Just always being the Hopper he shouldn't be in public.
"Jesus Hop!" Joyce hissed through clenched teeth one afternoon when he suddenly appeared at her locker. She didn't miss the grin on his face as she began to fumble putting her books into her locker.
"What are you doing?" She asked once her heart had returned to its normal rate and she had checked that the halls were vacant.
Hopper shook his head at her panic but glanced up and down the halls nonetheless.
"I've missed you" He pouted playfully, leaning against the locker beside hers. He couldn't help but notice her not making eye contact and simply shuffling her books in their metal storage unit.
"No one is around Joyce, you don't have to pretend that the sun doesn't shine out of my ass when it comes to me and you."
"Shouldn't you be getting ready for practice? Those jeans don't look very comfortable for wrestling." She snipped back, finally closing her locker and clearing out her combination for good measure.
"Coach won't say anything if I'm a little late. He'll just make me do an extra lap...or nine. Besides, I wanted to see you. You've been avoiding me all day."
"And for a good reason, you know the rules Hop…"
Jim stood to his full height, a good six inches taller than Joyce. The top of her head barely came to the hollow of his throat.
"Joyce, do you have any idea how hard it is to pretend that you don't exist? We are in school from seven thirty in the morning until three thirty in the afternoon. That's eight hours. Eight hours that I could be pining over you in the stairwell, but you won't let me."
Joyce frowned at the floor. Did he not know how hard it was for her to constantly push him away? To have to physically pull herself away from him or fight the urge to place her lips on his neck? She loved him so much she sacrificed her own joy just to make sure he was safe and protected.
"Please just go before someone sees you Hop." She falters, reaching to the ground to pick up her book bag.
"Joyce..." He pleaded, his hand reaching down for hers.
"Jim what's taking so long? We got practice!" Benny Hammond's voice shot through the deserted hall. Making both Joyce and Hopper jump out of their skin. Hopper quickly hit the lock on Joyce's locker, knocking the lock-free.
Hopper cleared his voice before glancing at Joyce. "Just helping with a stuck locker Benny, keep your tights on."
Benny came to a stop in front of the two of them, hands casually sliding down to rest over the dark green of his wrestling uniform.
"And why exactly are you worried about some street trash's locker? Come on dude, we're going to be late and I'm not doing extra laps because of you." Benny looked between Jim and Joyce, eyeing them both.
"You might want to wash your hands too, don't want whatever disease this thing has spreading to you or the team."
"Fucking great." Joyce mouthed to herself at the insult and turned on her heel, adjusting her book bag as she went.
"Don't be an asshole." Hopper knew he was crossing one of Joyce's imaginary lines. He knew he wasn't supposed to defend her, especially not at school, but he didn't care. Not now, when he wanted to throw his teammates head into the locker he stood beside. Joyce was unaware that it literally made his heart ache when he had to stand by and watch people ridicule her and treat her like yesterday's garbage. No one deserved that, especially not his Joyce.
"Whatever man, seriously though, wash your hands before you come to practice, I'm not risking catching something on the mats because you decided to play hero to the trash princess."
"Bastard" Hop thought to himself as he turned to go after Joyce, only to find the hallway empty without a trace of which way she went. Sighing, he looked down at his watch. Only two hours and twenty-six minutes before he saw her again and he was already counting down the seconds.
It had been nice at first, Hopper standing up for her. She felt comfortable for the first time in her life to be around someone, let alone a guy who was twice her size that she knew she couldn't take in a fight. However It had broken her heart when she saw how the kids were starting to treat Jim differently. All because he was associating himself with the gutter trash of Hawkins. That's when the agreement had been made. They would continue being friends. Best friends, but only in secret. Hopper hadn't liked the idea at first. Liked it even less now that Joyce was forcing him to date every single girl in Hawkins in an attempt to overthrow his feelings for her, but if it meant seeing Joyce every day he would take that secret to his grave.
They had been best friends since they were three years old. The fragile bond they had created over the years had become unbreakable. Constantly playing in the pastures between the Hopper Farm and the Horowitz trailer. It was there in those hay covered fields that Jim began to fall in love with her. It was also where he stumbled onto her deepest, darkest, secret for the first time. She had been fourteen at the time, Jim just a year older. They had been chasing after each other when Joyce tripped and fell to the ground, causing her white long sleeve shirt to ride up her body where it exposed her ribs and the bruises that covered them.
That very evening Hopper set his plan into motion. Between the overgrown hay fields and abandoned barns, Hopper with the help of his father made Joyce a sanctuary. The safe place she always needed when he couldn't be at her side. The tree house was cradled in the limbs of an old Oak tree twenty or so feet in the air. With his father's impressive carpentry skills, the tree house grew above Hoppers' expectations. He even added little shutters to the screened-in windows, making it feel more like a home than Joyce had ever lived in. The teens had tried to convince Hopper's father that the bruises had been a one-time thing. He, however, knew better. The Horowitz girl was scared of her own shadow most days, which didn't come from just a one time experience and Jim's dad already disliked Joyce's father. Having brought him to the station more than once for public intoxication and even an assault charge, he knew the guy was bad news. Nothing would have pleased him more than to bring the shit bag in for child abuse, but Jim had talked him out of it. Saying the girl already suffered enough at school without her father being the talk of the town.
Jim walked the half mile stretch from his house to the tree house. Over the years the weather had caused slight imperfections. A branch falling here or there chipping the paint. The snowstorm last year had taken out part of the railing on the backside, but with those exceptions, Joyce's haven was still standing stronger than ever. Just like the women Hopper knew was hiding inside of it at this very moment.
Hopper carefully walked toward the tree house, trying his best not to disturb the grass surrounding it. Placing his booted foot onto the first rung of the original ladder, he began his ascent. The weight and height he had gained in his numerous growth spurts didn't even seem to bother the aged wood, which didn't even bow under him as he climbed up. As he came to the top, the sound of the radio playing softly caught his ears, signaling that Joyce was indeed still mad at him. That was his reason for showing up so late after practice had ended, because he knew she was mad and didn't want to fight with her. Biting his tongue, he pulled himself into the tree house, his eyes immediately looking for Joyce.
He found her curled up on the couch with a book in hand, using the last little bit of daylight left to finish her chapter. She looked up from her book, gave him a slight wave and went right back to reading. The worn paperback in her hands was one he had seen her read numerous times and didn't even bother asking her what it was about anymore, already knowing the tale as if he had read it himself.
"Hey" He greeted, placing a paper bag on the couch between them. She ignored him, snuggling deeper into the couch that had been purposefully placed beside the biggest window so she could read until dark.
"Mom made burgers for dinner tonight. Said she added extra cheese on yours just the way you like it. Hell, she even sent a little thing of pickles on the side so the buns wouldn't get soggy." He commented, grabbing one of the burgers out of the bag. He didn't miss the sound of her stomach growling as the smell of a hot meal filled the tree house, but in all her stubbornness, Joyce still ignored him.
"Come on Joyce, I know you're hungry. You're practically trying not to jump on dinner now." Hopper scolded as he grabbed two cans of coke out of the bag. Handing her one, she quickly took it and put it between her legs in a makeshift can holder. Her eyes moved to the bottom of the page before she folded the small corner, marking her spot and closing the book. After placing it on the floor beside the couch, she reached for her burger and Hopper noticed the calculated moves she was making.
"I'm sorry about Benny. He's been a real asshole here lately." Hopper comments as Joyce takes a small bite of her burger.
"Here lately? He's always been an asshole, you just try to see the good in everyone Hop." She comments as she takes yet another small bite.
They continue to eat in silence. Neither one of them wanting to address the elephant in the room. Deciding to go ahead and bite the bullet, Hopper speaks first.
"Look Joyce I was only trying to-"
"You know the rules Hopper! Don't talk to me at school. At the tree house, or out in the fields, you can talk and touch me as much as you want to. But out there, where everyone can see, I don't exist, got it? I'm just the gutter trash that everyone claims that I am and that's how it needs to be! I don't want to drag you down into the shit I have to deal with. So just stay away from me out there!"
"I don't want to stay away from you Joyce! You would think after years of me telling you I love you and knowing I would do anything for you, that you would finally listen! I don't give a damn about what anyone at that school thinks! My momma and dad love you and those are the only two opinions that matter to me! I don't want to fight with you about this Joyce, cant you-"
"Then why are you even here Hopper? You know I'm mad at you." She snipped.
"Yes, I know you're mad at me. But I also know that you love me and dammit I'm tired of this arrangement and having to act like I don't love you too."
Getting frustrated and needing her to be close to him, Hopper reaches his hand out to Joyce's side trying to pull her close. It's when she flinches away from his touch that he realizes it was Wednesday and she had to go to the trailer for clothes before coming there. If he hadn't known her for years, he would have just assumed she didn't want to be touched by him. However, her reaction was one of a girl who had been touched too much.
"That son of a bitch." Hopper gritted his teeth, his frustration quickly turning to a fit of white-hot anger.
"What pissed him off this time?'' He questioned, trying to control his breathing. He could tell she was startled and didn't want to make it worse.
Joyce watched Hopper's knuckles turn white as he gripped the back of the couch, a habit he had developed after Joyce had pleaded with him not to punch the walls of the tree house when he was angry. With her bottom lip between her teeth, she contemplated lying to him.
"Tell me the truth Joyce, and no bullshit." He stated, not making eye contact with her.
"Got a B in calculus..." She confided, scooting into the far corner of the couch. Hopper knew she wasn't afraid of him. It was just a reflex she had developed over the years, a survival technique to make sure she made it to the next day. He flexed his jaw. Any parent should be over the moon with their daughter making a B in calculus, especially since that daughter was taking college-level calculus in a small school like Hawkins High. She was already the smartest kid there and everyone knew that. How much more did he want from her?
"How bad is it?'' He asked once he knew the anger he was feeling inside wouldn't be heard in his voice.
Silently, she lifted her shirt, exposing the new bruises forming over the ones that had still yet to heal. Her ribs looked like a child's painting. Just blotches of greens, yellows, blues and purples dancing along her side. Joyce couldn't bear to look Hopper in the eye, knowing the sadness there would make her feel even worse for getting that B.
"Jesus." He whispered, gingerly reaching out to touch around the damaged skin. Small cuts caught his attention. The dark red of dried blood not blending so well with the other colors.
"Is he cutting you now too?'' He asked, his voice quiet over the sound of crickets coming in from the windows.
"They're from the clasp of the belt."
"He used a god damn belt!?" Hopper's voice jumped up in volume, startling Joyce who quickly pulled her shirt down.
Knowing he had scared her Hopper opened his arms.
"Come here." He nearly begged. Without a fight Joyce allowed him to carefully take her into his lap where she rested her head on his shoulder. Forcing back the tears she knew were trying to fall, she attempted to catch her breath. There was no denying she was as tough as they come, but even warriors can only take so much before they break. When it got to this point, Hopper was the only person she'd trust enough to see her. Knowing he wouldn't try to take advantage of her vulnerability.
"It's okay I'm right here. Just let it out." Hopper soothed as he felt her small body began to tremble against his chest. Letting her tears fall, Joyce cried for almost an hour. Hating her life, hating her father, but most of all, loving the man whose arms were currently surrounding her like a steel fortress.
The sun had almost gone completely down, and as the room grew dim, Joyce sniffed and lifted her head to meet Hopper's eyes.
"Thank You." She whispered, wiping her sweaty hands on her jeans. "Thank you for loving me even when I give you every reason not too. You deserve so much better than this train wreck."
Hopper didn't hesitate to cup her cheek and wipe the last of her drying tears away with his thumb. He listened to her apologize endlessly. His chest becoming tighter and tighter the closer she got to breaking again.
"There's nothing in the world I've wanted more than you Joyce. You're the smartest, kindest person I have ever met and I'll never understand how no one else can see that. You're too good for this world and I don't give a damn what anyone says. They can go to hell for all I care."
Joyce couldn't help the small smile that graced her lips at his words. Anticipating Hopper's next move, Joyce leaned forward as he went to kiss her forehead, but instead of her hands staying at her side like usual, they guided Hopper's jaw downward, letting the kiss land on her lips. He tensed at first. Shocked by the boldness of her move. Quickly relaxing, Hopper kissed her back. It was slow, their lips gently meeting. Fifteen years of compassion and love poured from one another. Neither wanting to hold back their feelings any longer. Hopper found himself getting overwhelmed from the pure, raw emotion that Joyce was finally letting herself feel and parted from her, taking in a shallow breath before placing one final quick kiss on her lips and resting his forehead against hers.
Something wet touched Joyce's hand as she ran it over Hopper's stubbly cheek. Looking up, she noticed he was crying.
"That bad huh?" She asked, nuzzling into his shoulder. He didn't say a word.
When she lifted her head, Hopper was staring down at her, unshed tears in his eyes.
"Hop what's wrong?" She asked worriedly as she went to move from his lap. His arms quickly pulled her close again, hearing her gasp at the pressure on her side and quickly loosened his grip. "Nothing 's wrong Joy. It was… just completely perfect." He finished.
"So it was okay?"
"That has to be the dumbest thing you've ever asked me." Hopper laughed, snuggling if possible closer to her. That's when he realized what she meant by her question. It had been her first kiss.
"Hey look at me." Hopper coaxed his pointer finger under her chin.
"It was perfect. You are perfect. Don't ever think otherwise okay?"
Joyce smiled and placed a kiss on his collarbone. She had no idea what she was doing. She had spent the last six years of her life coming up with every excuse she could on why they shouldn't, and couldn't be together. How their friendship was risky enough, matter less throwing actual feelings into the mix. But there she was, kissing his collarbone and sending him mixed signals. A small part of her worried about what he might try to do outside the walls of the tree house now. The other was worried about what he might not do.
Hopper shivered slightly when her cool lips touched the warmth of his skin and absentmindedly tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear.
"Are you staying here tonight?" He asked.
She leaned into his touch without a second thought and gently nodded her head. "Yeah, don't see a point for me to go back home."
"Let's pull out the bed then before it gets completely dark." Reluctantly he pushed her to stand, taking care not to put any pressure on her left side. Once she was steady on her feet, Joyce went to the opposite wall grabbing a sheet from their small pile of supplies. This wasn't a new thing for them. Over the past four years, countless nights had been shared in the tree house. Night's spent crying, snuggling, and just talking until the early hours of the morning. They had endured thunderstorms, feet of snow, and much more.
As Joyce started removing the cushions from the couch, Hopper unfolded the bed and pulled the old sheet off. Throwing it into a far corner of the tree house he began to unlace his boots. Standing to his full height, he unbuttoned his flannel as he watched Joyce rummage through her overnight bag. Finally, pulling out her camera.
"Will you?" She asked timidly.
Hopper frowned and dropped his shirt unceremoniously onto the floor. Taking her camera in his hand he waited while she pulled up the side of her shirt. Once again revealing the damage. He had been the eye behind the lens of every one of these photos and each time his heart broke just a little bit more. Seeing her treated this way was exhausting, but a burden he gladly shouldered. He quickly snapped the picture and handed the camera back like it was no big deal.
The walls of the tree house were covered with hundreds of pictures of the two of them. Their first night in the tree house, first fishing trip, hell even the time Joyce had almost burned the place down with a candle. They were smiling in almost every single one of them. Smiling because they were that close to each other. Hopper had stolen one to keep in his wallet a long time ago, now worn with wear. He had taken it out every night he wasn't sleeping beside her just to see her beautiful face.
But the little black box behind the couch is where her current photo went. A reminder that things were not so great for her. It was filled with countless photos of her bruises, cuts, and nightmares she would have for the rest of her life. The little black box that hid behind the smiles of the wall. A box that would hopefully be the downfall of her father.
Joyce had her reasons for keeping them. Reasons Hopper couldn't even begin to understand, but he didn't bother her about them. It was a way for her to deal and that would be enough for him for now.
"So are you technically cheating on your girlfriend if you're staying here with me?" Joyce called over her shoulder as she pulled on a pair of sleep shorts. Glancing around the tree house she found Hoppers discarded flannel. Making a quick move for it, Joyce took off her long sleeve shirt and pulled his flannel on over her bra.
The sight of her in his shirt gave Hopper a feeling of possessiveness. To call her his and wanting everyone to know it. Joyce quickly did up the buttons before unclasping her bra, trying her best to make sure Hopper wouldn't see anything he hadn't seen before.
Brought back from his thoughts, Hopper stepped out of his jeans and rolled his eyes. "What girlfriend?"
"Don't you have a date with Chrissy on Friday night?"
"It's just a date, Joy. A date that you're forcing me to go on I might add. And besides, I've shared a bed with you for years and I'm not about to give that up."
Standing in just an undershirt and his boxers, he crawled across the bed to where she was standing, gently placing his hands on her hips. His thumbs rubbing small circles on her cold skin.
"I don't even like her and you know it." He whispered, placing another kiss on her forehead.
"You have to like her a little bit at least. I've seen you almost suck her face off." Joyce laughed as a chill that had nothing to do with the temperature covered her body. Moving back to his side of the bed, Hopper held up the blankets, encouraging her to climb under them with him.
"The only reason I make out with her or anyone else is because you said everyone would think I was queer if I didn't." He gently pinched her uninjured side as she crawled into bed with him. "I'm in love with you, not her Joyce. And one day I'm going to tell the world how I'm the luckiest man alive."
Joyce usually snuggled into his side, but tonight she crawled on top of him, wanting to rest her head on his chest.
"Well, this is new." Hopper commented as Joyce leaned down to place a kiss on his lips, shutting him up instantly.
Joyce straddled his thighs and continued to kiss him. Unable to hold back his excitement, Hopper moaned into her mouth. The top button of his flannel had come undone, giving him a tease of what was beneath and he ran his hands through her hair, her tiny frame trembling under his touch. She explored his mouth, sloppy and inexperienced, but Hopper loved every minute of it. Becoming more eager and less hesitant in her exploration, it took no time at all for them to find a rhythm that made a heat stir in the pit of his stomach.
"I'm sorry if I'm bad at this." Joyce whispered against his lips as she came up for a breath.
"You're not, trust me." A blush he was glad Joyce couldn't see spread across his cheeks. "As bad as I hate to say it, we should probably stop." He breathed against her neck, placing light kisses down the length of it. He had purposely been keeping her sitting on his stomach, so she wouldn't feel his erection against her.
"We can't stop, if you keep kissing me..." Joyce voiced as she leaned down closer to him.
"You're right." He sighed, giving her lip one last nip as she moved to lay down beside him. Laying with her injured side facing the ceiling, Hopper laid behind her, knowing she couldn't sleep unless her back was to him or a wall. He much preferred it to be him. Just knowing she was safe beside him was all he needed.
"How are you so goddamn good at that already?" He asked into the darkness.
"I read all the time Hopper, I've learned a thing or two from the pages of those paperbacks."
He made sure she was covered with their worn-out comforter, before placing a hand on her hip. Encouraged by his touch, Joyce scooted closer to him on the bed, his chest pressed up against her back.
"Joyce?"
"Yeah?"
"I'm sorry if I get a hard-on during the night."
"And there goes the moment." Joyce laughed and Hopper could have sworn she intentionally rubbed her ass against him.
"Joyce?" He called out once again.
"Hmm?" She responded with more of a sound this time.
"I love you."
Joyce reached for his hand in the dark and thread their fingers together. His large ones completely covering her own.
"I love you too Hop." She whispered. The words had been spoken between them numerous times before, but tonight however, Joyce felt they meant much, much more.