Chizuru's Lost Happiness
By TheBlackKid
Chapter 1 – The Normality of Life
"Chizuru…Chizuru…"
"*tired moaning*"
"Chizuru…It's time to wake up, Chizuru."
"*more tired moaning*"
…
…
"Chizuru…if you don't wake up, then I'll seduce you."
"Wh-What the hell?!" I quickly shot up from my bed and looked at my twin sister. Completely freaked out by what she had just whispered in my ear.
"*giggle* Works every time."
"Grr…Damnit, Sis! Quit whispering dirty stuff in my ear!" I grew angry after realizing that it was another one of her tricks to get me out of bed.
"Sorry, Chizuru. But you're such a heavy sleeper. Dirty thoughts are the only way to wake you up."
"Th-That can't be true! There are other ways!"
"You say that…but they don't work as much as dirty thoughts do. I didn't take for you to be a pervert, Chi…"
"I'm going in the shower." I quickly said as I shoved my hand in Sis's face. Pushing her out of the way and shutting her up at the same time.
"Wh-What?! B-But I was about to go in!"
"Should've done that then instead of whispering perverted things in my ear. Now you'll have to wait."
"*whine* Chizuru! We're going to be late for school!"
I paid no attention to my complaining sister and closed the door to the bathroom. Preparing myself for a long relaxing shower.
It's been 4 months since the biggest ordeal of Shinohara history happened and we've all been living pretty normal lives. Well…normal for our terms. Right before the first term ended, Kyouko finished her first light novel.
…
And if you're wondering…yes, I'm still a little upset about "Chizero". She couldn't pick a better name?
A-Anyway…during the summer break, we didn't do much of anything. Which was fine by me. I honestly hated the idea of going somewhere every single time. What a nuisance that was.
And now, it was September. The start of the second term. And I'm hoping that nothing dangerous, depressing, life-threating, or a mix of the three happen this time.
Then again, we do have 4 months until this term ends. That is plenty of time for weird crap to show up again.
I hope I didn't just jinx it…
Sis and I eventually finished getting ready and left our house to head for school. Now, if you're wondering why we didn't say goodbye to anyone…well, there's a reason for that.
Shortly after the show ended, our grandmother who we used to live with died of old age. She was a fighter, too. Died at the age of 103. She even outlived the already high life expectancy of most women being 87-years-old.
Do I plan on living that long? Well…not really. Living for over a century kinda scares me a little.
Point is, I haven't been happy since then. Granted, I'm rarely happy. But her death really hit it for me. I'm probably grumpier now than I was 2 years ago.
I still got Chitose, though. She and I still live in her old house. We didn't bother moving out of it. I mean, why should we? It's already paid off. We just pay for lights, water, and all that other stuff. Which isn't easy with the income we're getting.
Don't get me wrong. We ARE getting income. Sis apparently works at some café down in Harajuku and she get's a decent amount of money. Despite always coming home with a sore throat. I would ask her what it is that she's doing over there to make her get sore throats every time.
But the only answer I would get from her is:
"Being kawaii is SO worth the pain, Chizuru! *giggle*"
Honestly, it truly shocked me when I heard Chitose of all people say the word "kawaii" for the first time. It's supposed to mean cute…but hearing her say that did the opposite for me.
…
…
Don't tell her I said that.
Basically…Chitose's the only family I have now. And it is great sometimes. But other times, like this morning…*sigh* you get the idea.
"*sigh* It's the second term of our second year. Time does go by fast doesn't it, Chizuru?" Sis asked me.
"Yeah. I guess. Although we were pretty distracted most of first term."
"That's true. Though I am glad that Rise-senpai is doing a lot better now. The first time we met back at Nanamori I remember her being extremely shy. Never would've thought that it would be caused by severe depression."
"Everyone deals with depression in different ways, Sis. Like Akari gained a phobia, Rise-senpai grew extremely shy, and Kyouko…geez. Never thought someone like her would try to take her own life. I kinda feel sorry for her."
Sis then began laughing to herself a bit. Which left me confused.
"What?"
"Nothing. It's just…I remember how you absolutely hated Kyouko and would punch her whenever she got close to you. Now, it's like a complete 180 with you two."
…
…
"Huh. I guess it is." I said after thinking about it. "Never gave it any thought until now. I guess she became less of a pain in the ass than I remember her to be."
"I see…" Sis gained a sweatdrop.
Come to think of it, Kyouko isn't the only person I've grown to like over the years. Before, I didn't really know or care about the other people in our group of friends. The only exception being Himawari because I was friends with Kaede. Granted, I never knew that they were sisters until much later. But it still counts.
I'm not sure what happened that made me more friendly towards others. I remember being completely cold and taciturn towards others. Which, in turn, made it hard for me to make friends. But then something happened…
…
…
Oh, yeah. I…I remember now. It was Kaede. I made a promise to her that I would smile more. And then…
…
…
Ugh. My life changed for the better because of the words of a 6-year-old. Was I really that terrible at making friends?
"Ch-Chizuru! Look out for that…"
*BANG*
"GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! SON OF A…"
"…pole."
While lost in my own thoughts, I ran straight into a street lamp at full speed. My head was hurting like hell and I felt a little dizzy.
"Chizuru! Are you okay?!" Sis asked me.
"Y…Y-Yeah. I'm fine. Just a bit dizzy."
"Oh, no. Chizuru, you got a bruise on your head. And it's bleeding, too."
"I-I'm fine, Sis. I'll just wash it off and…"
"Wash it off, my ass. It needs proper treatment. Come on, let's hurry to the nurse."
"But Sis…"
"NO buts! We're going."
That's my sister for ya. Whenever I'm in trouble, she drops everything just to help me. It's nice…but I really wish she would easy up a little. I mean, we are in high school now.
"*sigh* Alright, Sis. I give." I said with a small smile on my face.
A smile filled with pain from the head injury. But it still counts.
*LATER. AT SHINOHARA…*
"Morning, everyone." Sis said to Ayano and Yui.
"Morning."
"Morning."
"H-Hey, Chizuru. What happened to your head?" Yui asked.
"I mindlessly ran into a pole. Left a bleeding bruise on my head."
"Aw, yes. The common side-effect of having your own story." Ayano said with a cheeky grin. "You're getting the basics down already, Chizuru."
"Shut it." I said in a pissed off tone.
"Well, at least it isn't worse." Yui said.
"I guess. Other than a small feeling of dizziness, I'm perfectly fine. But knowing Sis, she just wanted to make sure."
"I see. You know, it's kinda odd, Chitose. We always thought your mind was completely filled with nothing but perverted yuri fantasies."
"Hey! It's not completely filled with yuri fantasies. More like 99.9% filled."
"What?" The three of us were shocked by this admission.
"Then what the hell is the 0.1%?" I asked.
"Easy. You, Ayano, Yui, the others, family, school, work, smexy stuff…"
"Smexy stuff?" The three of us asked. But were completely ignored as Sis continued on with her list.
"…books, candy, and other miscellaneous stuff."
"All of that in just 0.1% of your brain?" Yui asked.
"Yep. All filled organized, too."
…
…
…
The three of us didn't bother with it any longer and went to go sit down. We've dealt with Sis long enough to know when to stop.
But sometimes…even that doesn't work with her.
My twin sister is such a freaking pervert…
When lunchtime finally came, we were heading for our usual meet-up spot. Being the old gym. The same gym where Ayano, Tsu, and Rukia meet up for volleyball practice. Ariana-senpai kept telling us that we can't eat lunch here. But with nowhere else to eat lunch, we kept coming here. And she eventually gave up and ate with us.
"*groan* It's only the second term and I'm already sick of school."
"You were always sick of school." Himawari said to Sakurako.
"Yeah, but now I have a reason to. Shinohara is insanely difficult. Its work, its schedule, and a whole bunch of other things. Not to mention that I got shot. This scar hurts like hell." Sakurako was referring to the scar that now resides on her stomach. It's where the bullet had struck her and she currently wears a bandage over it.
She can't do much on her own with it. Such as walking and changing clothes. So until it heals, she has to rely on someone to help her out. Kinda like Akari.
Well, at least she can somewhat relate to her crush now…
"Well…we can't blame you for that." Ayano said. "But I did tell you that Shinohara was strict when it came to its standards. They have a reputation that they want to keep."
"Yep." Ariana-senpai added. "And with just the 15 of us, we've managed to damage it."
"Oh, yeah…" The rest of us said with a sweatdrop of guilt. Remembering what had happened not even a week into the new school year.
"Maybe Hiro was right about calling us weirdos." Akari said.
"It does sound like it, Akari…" Chinastu added.
"Hiro?" Iyo-senpai asked.
"She's a friend of ours who went to Nanamori with us. She and two more of our friends go to a different school. Hey, what was it called again?"
"Rakuyama High School. It's like really far in the opposite direction of Nanamori." Rise-senpai said. "It's also an all-girls school."
"What?!" Sis yelled. Scaring the hell out of all of us. "So, they get to go to an all-girls school while I'm stuck here at Shinohara?!"
"Why are you so obsessed about going to an all-girls school?" Tsu asked.
"Because, Tsu. At an all-girls school, most of the girls there are definitely lesbians!"
"What?"
"THAT'S your reason?" Rukia asked as both girls were looking at Sis with a confused look.
"She's got a point, you guys." Ayano said.
"Yeah I mean, look at us." Chinastu added. "We all went to Nanamori, an all-girls middle school, and it was there that we realized that we were all lesbians. Well, except for the three that we mentioned."
"Plus, it's easier to talk about lesbian sexual stuff at an all-girls school. Can't do that with all these boys here." Chitose pouted.
"Sis, it should never be easy to talk about lesbian sexual stuff." I retorted with an uncomfortable sweatdrop.
"Wait, I am confused. Does going tū an arr-girrs schooru tsurn you intó a resbian?" Madeleine-senpai asked.
"No, Maddie. It just happened to these girls." Ariana-senpai said.
"Oh. Heureux de savoir, Ari." Madeleine-senpai then started to giggle. A common thing she does whenever she learns something about Japanese culture.
Which, by the way, she still has a lot to learn.
"Eh…I still don't get it." Tsu said.
"Me neither." Rukia added. "I just don't understand how none of you want a pringle in your taco."
"Wh-What?!" The lesbians (including me) yelled with shock and embarrassed blushes.
"R-Rukia, stop saying that!" Kyouko yelled at her cousin.
"Hey, I'm just saying."
""Pringle"?" Iyo-senpai asked. "Wouldn't "pickle" make more sense?"
"Or "cucumber"?" Tsu asked.
"Or "zucchini"?" Ariana-senpai asked.
"Oru "eggprant"?" Madeleine-senpai asked.
"Will you four just shut up already?!" Yui yelled at them all.
…
…
…
"Hey, how about "pingas"?"
"SAKURAKO!" We then yelled at her.
"Sorry. I couldn't resist. *giggle*"
Why couldn't her sense of morality change when she got shot?
*INSERT CLASSIC JAPANESE SCHOOL BELL CHIME HERE*
"God, that was a horrible conversation." Chinastu said.
"I've never felt so embarrassed before in my life." Ayano added.
"Let's never bring this up again." Yui said. "Agreed?"
"Agreed." The rest of us lesbians said.
"Well, crap. Now I'm craving some Pringles."
"RUKIA!" Kyouko yelled at her.
"I meant the chips! Sheesh! You don't have to get so worked up over it."
You're the reason why we're so worked up in the first place!
Ayano, Yui, Sis, and I were heading back to class while trying to forget that unnerving conversation Rukia had started.
"Geez, that girl. And yet, she gets mad at Tsu and I for teasing her." Ayano said.
"Who's our last teach for today?" Yui asked her.
"Uh…let me check." Ayano checked the schedule that we all share on her phone. "Oh, hey. It's Ana."
"Ana, huh? She already has a reputation here."
"Yeah. As the teacher who doesn't give a damn." I said.
"She's totally the opposite of Nishigaki. She's pretty much cold to everyone." Sis said. "Except Kyouko."
"How Kyouko managed to get on her good side is beyond me." Yui said.
"Us, too." The rest of us said with a sweatdrop.
*LATER…*
"Alright. Sit down, shut up, and let's get this over with. I ain't got all day." Ana greeted the class in her usual "annoyed at everything" tone. She teaches Literature. And so, despite her cold attitude sometimes, learning from her has been really interesting.
"Before I start, I'm supposed to let you guys know about the Cultural Festival next month. Due to the incident 4 months ago, It has been confirmed that this year's festival is canceled."
"What?! Canceled?!"
"But I've been waiting all year for this!"
"It's all thanks to the jerkwad that got shot!"
"They're blaming Sakurako?!" The four of us whispered in disgusted shock.
"Hey, shut up! I wasn't finished!" Ana yelled as the class got too excited.
"So, the Cultural Festival's canceled, huh? Makes sense considering what happened 4 months ago." Ayano said.
"Yeah, no kidding." Yui said. "I bet the school's still trying to ease up the controversy of letting a student bring a gun to school."
"I bet they're trying to lay low for a while. Which is probably why they canceled this year's festival."
"Aw. But the Cultural Festival is the best part of the school year. It's always fun to plan class themes and release our creativity." Sis said.
"Chitose…your "creativity" is what everyone fears."
"What? That can't be true."
"It is."
"100% true." Yui added.
"Hmph. Jerks. Fine, I'll prove it to you that you're wrong." Sis then raised her hand with sheer determination. "Ana-sensei!"
"What, Chitose?"
"If the festival was still going on, I had the perfect idea for our class theme!"
"If it involves anything yuri-related, then I don't want to hear it."
"B-But…w-well…d…damnit." Sis slumped down back to her seat while the rest of the class was either chuckling or staring at her with uncomfortable looks.
"Told you." Yui and Ayano said.
"Shut up! You agree with me right, Chizuru?!"
"Eh? Well, I guess." I said. "I never have any interest in those things, to be honest."
"*whine* Chizuru!"
"Alright, quiet." Ana said. "Anyway. As a way to fill it in, the school has arranged a small party on November 3rd for students and faculty to attend. You can bring family members and friends from other schools. Just give a notice in advance to the Student Council."
"*groan* I wanted a festival." One student complained.
"Oh, grow the hell up, kid. Life isn't all sunshine and rainbows like how you want it to be. Once you realize that, you'll stop being an ungrateful little brat."
"So cold, as always…" The four of us gained a sweatdrop.
"Oh. There's something else." Ana looked at the slip of paper in her hand. "It says there's going to be a live performance at the party. Some J-Pop idol named…Lyrica."
"L-Lyrica?!" The whole class shouted in glee.
"Holy crap! Lyrica's coming to our school!" A female student yelled.
"I'm a huge fan of hers! Her music is SO addicting!" Another female student shouted.
"Man. To have someone as sexy as Lyrica performing here live…I'm definitely coming to this party now." One male student said to another.
"You said it. If I can get a picture of her in a sexy outfit, it would make not having a Cultural Festival all the more worth it."
"*sigh* Again?" Ana grew annoyed.
"So, uh…who the hell is Lyrica?" I asked the other three.
"Seriously? You don't know who she is?" Ayano asked.
"Chizuru doesn't listen to J-Pop." Sis said. "Or any music, for that matter."
"You didn't have to tell them that, Sis." I grew agitated.
"Just saying."
"Ugh." I then turned to Yui, who was scrolling through her phone in what looked like in a panicked state of mind. "Yui?"
"Gah!" She jumped up once I called out her name sacring the rest of us in the process. "Y-Yeah, what's up?"
"You okay, Yui?" Ayano asked.
"You're looking a bit panicky." Sis added.
"P-Panicky? O-Oh, it's nothing. J-Just, uh…I-I'm excited that Lyrica's performing here. That's all."
"Huh? You're a fan?" I asked.
"Y-Yeah…you can say that…" Yui slowly turned her head away from us while gaining a small blush on her face. We didn't know what was up with that. So, we just left it alone.
"Alright! Shut up, already! Freak out about this idol girl later!" Ana yelled. Completely pissed off at the moment.
Class then began as normal. Just like everything else that happened today (besides the conversation from Rukia), it's just going to be a normal life for a normal teenage girl like me.
Nothing crazy is going to happen to me like the previous four. It's going to be completely normal.
…
…
…
I just jinxed myself hard, didn't I?
Author's Note: Sorry for the long wait. But here's story #5 of the Inner Struggles series: Chizuru's Hidden Feelings. This one's going to be a pretty relaxed one. As it's going to be a story to which the characters are still recovering from the incidents of Rise's story.
That doesn't mean it won't have its share of nonsensical madness. As for example, this will be the story that debuts the STUPIDEST character I have EVER came up with. How stupid? Well, you're just gonna have to wait and see.
So, uh…just to let you guys know, I'm not doing EVERY single character for this series. It's usually been either a random pick or based on requests (like Rise's story). And as of right now, Sakurako's is the last one. Let me repeat: AS OF RIGHT NOW! It could change in the future. But so far, this is how it's looking right now.
Next chapter is planned to be released tomorrow. Not making any promises, but we'll see. Thanks for reading. Later.