"What do you mean you saw us?" Olivia asked confused, shaking her head.
Elliot sighed and looked at her. All he wanted to do was get lost in those eyes that made him melt, and never look away.
"Paris." He cleared his throat and sat back.
Olivia's eyes narrowed, "I don't understand. Have you been following me?" She asked half-jokingly and half serious.
"Liv." Elliot groaned.
Ever since that night that he saw Olivia with Tucker, he couldn't get that image out of his head. He watched her propose to her, and he watched her say yes. He watched him put that ring on her finger, and kiss her. He was seething with jealously and anger at the time, and all he could do was hide his emotion. Kathy was standing near him, taking in the views, oblivious to what Elliot was even watching. They had went to Paris for the weekend, the kids stayed at their flat in small European town.
"This is the best trip you've taken me on." Kathy smiled and wrapped her arms around Elliot from the sighed and leaned her head against his chest. Elliot smiled a little and rubbed her back, eyes still locked on Olivia. He thought that she had saw him, but they were too far away to actually make eye contact. He sighed to himself and walked away, trying to erase the image from his head.
That should have been him, and he had fought that for years. He had attempted to fight for his marriage, years after he knew it was over. Kathy was the mother of his children, his high school sweetheart, and at the time, he thought the love of his life. And the first time that he laid eyes on Olivia, he knew that he would never be the same. He knew that Olivia was the love of his life, but he was committed to his marriage, his wife, his faith. He wasn't the type of man to just up and leave, and when Kathy did that shortly after their return to New York, he couldn't wrap his head around it.
"It has ALWAYS been HER!" Kathy yelled, packing her things. "I have never been able to compete with Olivia, and I will never be able to compete with her. We all know you love her more than your family." She hissed through tears.
"You don't get to say that." Elliot was angry. Those words stung like a thousand knives to the chest. "I have always been faithful to you, and to my family."
Kathy laughed and shook her head. "You may have physically been faithful to me, but when you're fucking me, you've always thought of her. Haven't you?" She shook her head. "I can't believe you thought bringing us back to New York would be the best thing. How long have you been screwing her, huh?" She looked at him, her eyes puffy and stinging.
"How many fucking times do I need to tell you, SHE DOESN'T KNOW I'M HERE?" He growled and took a step towards her, causing her to step away from him, afraid of what he may do. He had never laid a finger on her, and he never would, but Kathy knew that she had struck a nerve.
"I don't believe you. I've never believed anything either of you have said to me about your relationship. I know you love her. You've always loved her. You will always love her. You came here to apologize to her, make her know how sorry you are, and how much you've missed her. I told you, Elliot, I can't compete with that!" Kathy cried out and sat on the bed. "I can't go back ten years and go through all of that pain again." She shook her head.
Elliot sighed and rubbed his face, then looked down at her. "I didn't come here for Oliva, I haven't seen her, she doesn't know I'm here, and she sure as hell won't talk to me. But I can't make you change your mind, and I can't stop you from leaving. So if you want to leave, then leave. I'm not chasing after you." He never thought he would have had to say those words to the woman he had been with for over twenty years. He had deep love for Kathy, she was the only woman he had been intimate with in over twenty years. But she was right, he did love Olivia, and he knew that he always would. Their late nights, and early mornings, feeling guilty for even being with her because of work… It ate away at him, and it eventually ate away at his marriage.
Olivia sat back in disbelief after Elliot had told her that Kathy left her. He left out the details of her being the reason, and Kathy not trusting them. He knew that she couldn't handle that right now, and he knew that if he wanted to make things right between them again, he needed to gain her trust and go slow.
"Elliot…" Olivia sighed and looked into his baby blues. "I'm so sorry… I didn't know." She sighed.
Elliot laughed a little and shook his head, "How could you? I didn't even see it coming.. I'm mostly to blame.. Bringing them all over the universe for me.. Not taking anyone's feelings into consideration.." He shrugged. "I came back to work on a case, and that's the truth. I heard about Ed throughout the force… and I know I shouldn't have just shown up, but I wasn't sure if you would even answer my call." He sighed and looked at her.
Olivia frowned, "I tried… For months after you left. I felt like a piece of my heart had been ripped out of my body, and I never thought I would be okay.. And hearing your voice and seeing you today.." She laughed a little and finished off her drink. "I felt like I was going crazy. I couldn't believe it.. I didn't want to believe it. I didn't want to think that you could actually be back." She sighed.
Elliot reached over and grabbed her hands. "Olivia.." He felt like he was being suffocated, he couldn't breathe. Hearing how much he fucked her up, and broke her heart. That wasn't ever his intention, and he thought he was going to lose her again in this moment.
"El, I've missed you every single day that I haven't seen you." Olivia held back her tears. "You were my best friend, my partner. You would listen to me rant about everything, you wouldn't tell me I was wrong, unless it was really bad." She laughed a little and pulled her hand away to wipe her cheek and placed it back where it belonged.
"I know I have a lifetime of explaining and apologizing, and I'm just thankful that you let me take you here. Baby steps.." He smiled a little.
"Baby steps." Liv slowly breathed out.