A/N: This chapter has its ups and downs again :) Enjoy! Only a few chapters left now... xx Mariah
When Ned pulled into the driveway after a long day at work, he felt a little thrill as he saw Katie's car already parked there. He'd moved back in a little over a week ago, and his heart never failed to beat faster whenever he remembered that this was permanent.
No longer did he have to stay at the precinct for as long as possible to avoid coming home to an empty apartment; no longer having to try to ignore the silence or tossing and turning while trying to sleep on a cold, lonely futon. He had gotten rid of his apartment, packed everything up (what little he did have), and moved back into their house again.
Though walking in through the front door was easily one of the best parts of his day, a close second was that Ned could already smell the aroma of something delicious wafting through the air. "Honey, I'm home!" he called out as he closed the door behind him.
"In the kitchen, babe!" Katie called back.
He pulled off his shoes before he entered the kitchen to find her standing at the counter, an apron over her jeans and blouse as she chopped up a variety of different things from fresh cilantro and basil to onions and mushrooms. Ned wrapped his arms around her waist. "Something smells mighty good!" He said into her ear as he kissed her cheek, squeezing her hips.
She set the knife down before turning around in his arms, pulling him in for a quick kiss on her lips. "Oh, it's nothing much. Just making a vodka alfredo sauce while the shrimp cook. The noodles are nearly done, but I'm just chopping up the stuff for the salad now. Then the garlic bread goes in. "
"Nothing much, huh?" He chuckled with a shake of his head.
"Well, I wanted to make something nice for us." She shrugged as she turned back to finish chopping the vegetables. "How was work?"
"Eh. It was slow but Cap hired a new guy named McMillan to try and bulk the force up because Jamison is considering early retirement next year, and he's pissing me off." He sighed as he turned toward the sink and washed his hands. "The guy was a detective with the Indianapolis P.D., and of course he thinks he knows everything. Naturally, this means he's trying to take all of the plum assignments and has insinuated that a 'small town nobody like me,'" he curled his fingers into air quotes before drying off his hands, "shouldn't have this kind of job."
Katie turned and gave him a side glance. "Well, since we both know that Josh highly values you and your expertise as a detective, so I'm sure that he'll ignore the asshole." She said as she set the knife down now that she was finished with it and went to stir the noodles.
"Yeah, but not before he drives me up a fucking wall." He groaned, tossing the hand towel he dried his hands with at the wall in frustration. "Anyway, I've vented and you haven't. How was your day? Put me to work."
"Boring as shit, as usual. I did four loads of laundry and decided to rewatch WandaVision again." She said, stirring the sauce now. "Why don't you go get changed and I can tell you all about how I cried over television into our couch pillows like I haven't seen that show ten times."
Ned chuckled. More like twenty-five times. "Are you sure I can't help you with dinner first?" He chuckled as he slid in behind her again to pull her in close. "Or get you to come shower with me?"
She leaned back into his arms enough to glance up at him easily. "As tempting as that is the sauce won't reheat well so go get comfortable and we can fool around later," she suggested and gave him a final kiss before tossing the garlic bread in the oven.
"That sounds like a wonderful idea. I'll be quick then," he said before he ran off upstairs to their room to change.
As he stripped off his dress shirt and opened the closet door to hang it up, he smiled. It was still so nice to see his clothes hanging on the other side of the closet, just like they were supposed to be. Being back in the house and seeing all of their things made it seem like a home—their home—again.
Once he'd changed into a baggy pair of jeans and a long-sleeved white cable-knit sweater, he padded down the steps and back into the kitchen, where he found the table set with glasses, dishes, silverware, and bottles of salad dressing.
"I would have done that, you know," he tsked.
"It's okay," she replied with a shrug. "You can clean up; how's that?"
"I know how much you hate doing the dishes so you have yourself a deal," he said coming into the kitchen as she offered him a taste of her sauce, which was savory and delicious. "Yum. Is there anything I can do?"
Katie shrugged. "Everything is done," she said as she plated the salad and pasta, and then grabbed an oven mitt as the timer went off to pull out the garlic bread. "But you could open a bottle of wine for us if you wanted."
After Ned grabbed the bottle from the fridge and brought it into the dining room with his plate, they sat down to eat. He opened the bottle and poured them each a glass before eagerly digging into the meal, proclaiming it delicious, and the pleased grin she gave him made his stomach flip.
"So, tell me about your day," he prodded her.
"It consisted of switching the loads over, folding clean clothes, and crying over Wanda and Vision's love story again…" She said as she poured dressing over her salad and mixed it. "In other words, it was a perfect day by myself."
"And you said that today was boring," he lightly teased her, waving his fork in her direction.
When they finished eating dinner and the bottle of wine, Ned did the dishes while Katie picked out something for them to watch. It didn't matter. She had other things on her mind tonight and hoped he did too.
Twenty minutes passed before her husband resurfaced from the kitchen. "So, uh, what did you pick?" He asked, walking toward her and sitting down on the sofa beside her.
"I haven't decided yet." She said, handing him the remote. "You choose."
He rolled his eyes and pressed a button on the remote while she grabbed the blanket folded over the back of the couch to toss over them. "You always hate the stuff I pick," he said, pouting, only to have it removed by a kiss from her. "We could watch an episode of Black Mirror."
"No, I'm not looking to watch what's on the tv," she laughed. "You know?"
"We could always put Criminal Minds on then. It's garbage nowadays," he suggested with a shrug and pressed play. "If we're just going to be fooling around."
Katie nodded. "Well, there was something else I wanted to bring up. I've been thinking about it a lot," she said. "What if we renewed our vows for our anniversary? It's coming up and I think it would do us some good after everything we've gone through this last year. We could have just our family and close friends there and a little party afterward."
"I would love to do anything that will make you happy, especially if we get a second wedding night." He agreed, smiling.
She bit her lip at the implication. "But of course. It's tradition, isn't it?"
"Like the garter toss," he teased and inched closer on the couch.
She rolled her eyes. "We didn't do that the first time and we won't be doing that sexist tradition this time either," she said.
"I was only joking," he said, tugging her onto his lap. "But you could always wear one and let me take it off you later."
"Maybe," she said, thinking on it. "I do want you to wear a suit, but I don't think I'll wear my same wedding dress. It won't fit anyway."
Ned frowned as he ran his hand up her side, but at that moment, she tensed up. She hated it. The emotions and reactions she couldn't control. The insecurities. Katie felt like a different person, and in some way she was, but he loved her all the same.
"Hey, that doesn't matter to me. You can wear whatever makes you feel good, and know that no matter what I think you are the sexiest woman in my life." He said, sitting up to look into her eyes and cup her cheek. "I love you. Nothing will ever change that."
"I love you," she whispered.
And Katie would have said more if her brain let her form words, but they were well past that point now as she dipped down to capture his lips with a sharp kiss, rough and scruff and full of need.
His sweater was tossed across the floor in one quick swipe, and both of their jeans slid down quick enough in a pile by the coffee table, but she still had her blouse on when they settled back on the couch and their lips touched again, half unbuttoned and pulled open to reveal her breasts.
"Straight down to business, huh?" he whispered against her mouth, and she could feel the grin that stretched from either cheek.
"I want you," she managed to pant in between frantic, messy kisses.
Ned's hands were everywhere, caressing and squeezing and holding her in his lap. This was the part of these nights that she dreamed of again, with the sloppy kisses trailing across her breasts like he was mapping her body with his mouth. Her breath hitched with every nip of teeth, contrasting the soft and sweet lip presses as he slid out from under her and got down on his knees.
He truly was beautiful anytime, blond hair pushed out of his face and those piercing green eyes staring back at her in the dark, but he did look best between her thighs.
And she always made sure to tell him as much. "My favorite angle," she chuckled as his hands slid under her ass, pulling her closer, nearly off the couch entirely.
His fingers deftly hooked around the waistband of her panties and he quickly pulled them down. She couldn't even see where they landed, ripped away so fast she barely realized it.
"Is this what you want, sweetheart?" He asked.
Katie could hear the smugness in his voice as he pressed a teasing kiss to her thigh, his five o'clock shadow scraping the soft skin sending shivers down her spine. Each kiss inched closer to her center, with that playful, raspy banter that came in the low tones.
She could listen to it forever, every word going straight to her clit.
That prickle of need raced through her with every teasing swipe of tongue against her bare skin, those eyes challenging her.
Ned slid a fingertip at her entrance, swirling around the wetness already there. He was waiting for the magic words.
"I want it," she told him breathlessly, getting the hint. "Please."
With a glint in his eyes, he dove in mouth first, lapping at her like a man starved. She could feel every hum, every breath as he worked her over, but all Katie wanted was a little friction.
His fingertips circled the spot that made her toes curl, and she choked on her breath, eyes snapped shut as she focussed on the tight coil in her belly.
"Don't hide those moans from me, baby," he warned against her in a bit of a growl.
She threaded her fingers through his hair in response, watching those eyes asking her for the next step, looking up at her with his mouth shining in the dark. Begging. She knew how this dance went. The next part of this little exchange for them. That silent scream for more.
It wasn't long before his thumb found the mark, working her over as she struggled to breathe. With another tug at his hair, part prompt, and part guide, his tongue found it too. Too lost in the pleasure, chasing her release, she nearly jumped when Ned curled his fingers inside her, humming against her as her thighs shuddered around him.
"Mm, you close?" He asked.
All Katie could manage was a low moan as she scrabbled for a couch pillow to grab. If her ears were working, she might have heard the breathy chuckle between her legs as her husband sped up his ministrations.
"I'll take that as a yes," he teased.
She came with a gasp, breath hitching as Ned rode her through the crest of her orgasm, slipping his fingers out and running them between his lips as she came back down. But Katie was in no mood to take her time, and he was already stripped of his underwear and standing at attention as she sat up on the couch.
"Your turn," she challenged, reaching out to stroke him, watching as his eyes darkened.
His hand reached out to stop her, but she grabbed hold, tugging him down to the couch. Her fingers quickly found his hair again, knees settling on either side of his lap like they'd done a thousand times before. With a rough kiss, she tugged at his lip, little nips as she held his head in place and steadied herself by his hair.
He lined up his cock for her, and she groaned as she slid down. He smirked. "You always look so good riding me," he whispered.
She pulled him flush against her, rolling her hips, trying to milk that sweet sound out of him—that particular brand of helpless moan that she loved. But he was just as keen for a reaction, pressing sloppy kisses to the crook of her neck, marking her with his teeth and love bite as he murmured encouragement and praises, and every gravelly whispered word sent her closer to the edge.
They egged each other on, grabbing for each other, desperate for the skin on skin as the room filled with the sounds of them. There would be fingerprints on her ass cheeks in the morning, but Katie was the one who was really in control. One hand in his hair, keeping him in place, she could feel the muscles of his back with her free hand, and the strength in his arms as he held her.
Nipping at the open skin on his neck, she relished every moan, every breath caught in his chest.
"Please," he whispered. "More."
Katie could have watched him like this forever, seeing the shiver that ran through him with every tug on his hair. The way his eyes seemed to glaze over. That sex-addled haze and glow. But she was finding it harder to keep her whimpers at bay, with her clit rubbed against Ned with every thrust. That beautiful friction built up inside her, and it was getting hard to keep her hold of him.
Catching onto her closed eyes and thrown back head, his hips snapped to meet hers, territorial growls as she clenched around him, somehow already close to her edge.
"Baby," she breathed, the only warning she could verbalize at the moment. "Oh, fuck."
But all he offered was a breathy chuckle as he egged her on, "Mm, do I get to feel you come around my cock, sweetheart? I'm a lucky man."
With a strangled cry of his name, she tightened her hold on his hair as she peaked, barely listening for the moans, those shudders that came when he was close. The way his body froze inside of her, spilling out until the only thing in the air was their panting and the smell of sex.
"We're going to have to wash these cushions before we have anyone over again, huh?" she asked with a smile, too tired to get up from off the couch at the moment.
Ned shrugged, "Worth it." He said and kissed her again.
The following afternoon, Ned trudged out of the main conference room, feeling irritated beyond belief. He'd just come out of another staff meeting where McMillan had tried to dominate the discussion about all of the current cases and had even tried to worm his way into working on one of his assignments. Luckily, LeTrai had picked up on it quickly and had immediately shut McMillan down.
Unfortunately, it hadn't done anything to improve his mood.
However, Katie was waiting by his desk with a to-go bag in her hands and that did the trick. "Why, hello there, gorgeous. I thought you were going to a movie with Mackenzie tonight?" He asked, smiling, as he picked up the bag and set it on his chair.
"Hiya, handsome. Yeah, Mack's in the car because she's still mad at you," she chuckled, giving him a quick hug and kissing his cheek. "I just had a feeling that barbeque takeout for you and Jamison might make your guy's day better and had a little bit of time before the movie. Especially after what you told me yesterday."
He nodded, giving her an extra squeeze. "It'll be perfect because we're going on a stakeout. It's a sweet and thoughtful gesture, one that makes me so happy after a crappy meeting."
"I'm sorry to hear that today sucked again, sweetheart," she sympathized.
"Well, it doesn't suck anymore. Even if I'll be home later than usual," he said as he wrapped his arms around her waist. "Thank you. But you should probably get going to the movie, right?"
"I'm glad I could help, and yeah I should go before Mack starts texting me." She said, giving him another hug. "Don't be afraid to wake me up when you get home. No matter how late."
Ned could see McMillan approaching his desk and bit back a sigh. He didn't want him to meet his wife just yet. "I will. Promise," he said, ushering her towards the door and walking her out to her car. "I'll text you before I leave if it's not too late."
"Did you walk me out because of the new guy?" She asked, eyeing him suspiciously.
He shrugged and tried to control her facial expression so that it didn't reflect his annoyance with McMillan. "Maybe I just wanted to do this," he said, pulling her in close to kiss her again but it only lasted for a moment before Mackenzie honked the horn of Katie's car.
Katie laughed and gave him another quick peck before pulling away. "I hate to say it, Ned, but you could've kissed me in there. I understand it through. Talk to you later."
"Bye, babe. Love you." He said, waving at Mack too even if she ignored him.
"Love you too, honey," she said before getting into the car and driving off.
They walked into this week's therapy session together, holding hands. As Katie settled down into her usual spot on the sofa, Ned sat right next to her and put his arm around her shoulders, and she leaned into him, taking his hand into her lap.
"Well, this looks like a nice start to our session," Dr. Roberts commented, a wide smile on his face. "I'm assuming that you both decided your future together?"
She laughed. "We did. I realized that I just don't want to live my life without Ned in it—as my husband, my best friend, my partner, and my lover." She looked over at her husband and gave him a tender glance.
"The day she told me was one of the happiest days of my life, second only to the day when she said yes to my proposal and the day she became my wife," he replied, giving her a tender smile of his own.
"I have to say that I'm not surprised; I had a feeling that things would turn out this way. You two love each other too much and put entirely too much effort into therapy to have walked away. The couples I've counseled that didn't make it? They were just numb and going through the motions—but you two were still so passionate about each other and your marriage even though you had your difficulties that I refused to give up hope." Dr. Roberts said. "So, what was the final turning point for you, Katie?"
"Since I was turning another year older, I had to reassess what I wanted for my future. Did I want to start fresh and try to find someone new? Was it fear of the unfamiliar and unknown that made me want to keep trying with Ned? Would I find someone else out there who was meant to be my soulmate? Or should I just stop being stubborn and admit that I'd already found him and would be an idiot to let him go" She confessed, feeling tears prick the corners of her eyes. "I finally acknowledged to myself that if I walked away from my marriage like it was nothing I'd only be spiting myself and making myself miserable. And I know Ned long enough to know that he's been fully committed to changing and improving our relationship; as we've gone through this process, he's shown me nothing less."
"I'm really glad that you chose me, sweetheart." He said and kissed her forehead. "Because I know that you are the only one for me, and you'll always be."
"Have you moved back into the house yet, Ned?" Dr. Roberts asked.
Ned nodded. "Yes—last week."
"And how have things been so far? Any arguments, disagreements?" Dr. Roberts questioned. When they both shook their heads, the doctor chuckled. "I figured. You're both aware that this is still a honeymoon phase, right?"
"Yeah," he admitted. "I mean, we're acting 'real' with each other now, but things are almost too perfect. There haven't been many reasons for us to get annoyed or angry with each other."
"I think we should use this session as a refresher about how you two can express your anger or frustration with each other and settle those disagreements in a healthy, constructive way. What we don't want to happen is for the two of you to get settled into an approximation of your old relationship and begin to fight the way you used to. So, let's see if you both remember what we've talked about." Dr. Roberts leaned back in his chair and regarded them with a neutral expression on his face.
Katie started things off. "When I'm upset, I need to tell Ned how I'm feeling and why, rather than holding things in and then blowing up later on." She explained. "I can't hold on to resentments and then have them build up and spill out—it's not fair to him, and it's not fair to me."
"That's a good start," the therapist praised her lightly.
Ned answered next. "When we're arguing, we need to stick to the topic at hand. If the issue is about me leaving the toilet seat up, I can't yell back at her about the other guys she used to flirt with."
Everyone chuckled. "That's right—and I'm sure Ned, you know you'll never win the toilet seat argument." Dr. Roberts said.
"I'm well aware," he agreed.
"That's the other thing," she added. "We should always try our best to have calm, rational conversations about problems, instead of resorting to screaming matches and name-calling. And if we do start to raise our voices, one or both of us should stop, take a deep breath, and reboot.
"If things do get heated between us, despite our best efforts, we should immediately apologize—and mean it," he said.
"Great," the doctor told them. "And sex? How's that been?"
Katie felt her face heat up and she didn't, Ned did.
"It's been good and fun, but it's always been like that," he said. "We just cannot fall back into using it to avoid difficult discussions or as a way to try to control each other."
She blushed. It has always been good, but especially fun. "Yes, he's right. It should be because we enjoy being together and want to express our feelings for each other," she finally added. "Sex should be a way to have fun with each other and be close."
"Wow—you guys have been paying attention over the last few weeks! I'm impressed!" Dr. Roberts told them with a grin. "My next question may anger one or both of you, but I am curious though... has Ned's discretions in the past made it difficult in your sex life?"
They both fell silent for a moment.
Katie had tried not to think about it. About her husband fucking that woman. "You mean when he cheated?" She asked, letting it fly off her tongue without thinking about it much. "Or when he dated the same woman after during our separation?"
"Both," Dr. Roberts said, looking to Ned then. "Do you have anything to add?"
"We... or well, I shouldn't speak for Katie but I've tried to put Becca in the past. It's done and over with." He answered. "Just like how I don't bring up that you went over to Toby's house."
She rolled her eyes. "I didn't cheat on you with him and date him again afterward. I had one dinner with him! And then before things went too far, Toby did as he always as and he said some things... and it didn't feel right so I went home." She explained, holding nothing back and feeling tears prick the corner of her eyes. There was no reason to. "I just kept thinking about you and what you might think... and about how I wanted to fix our marriage. What did you think about when you fucked her, huh?"
Ned looked pissed. He wanted to scream and likely storm off. It was what he always did, but this time he couldn't, or at least he chose not to. After all, he did have free will. "I used it as an escape. I've told you that a million times. Toby... he was rubbing everything in my face and then some." He grumbled, practically grinding his jaw as he spoke. "I was pissed and Becca was easy."
"Toby is a liar and a narcissist, and you played right into his hand," she muttered, wiping away an escaped tear.
"Great question, doc," he sighed.
"Well, I think this is a great thing to build off of and I have to say that you both did a great job talking things out even if it was an argument," Dr. Roberts replied. "Now let's try to reconcile. Katie, I can see that you still haven't completely forgiven Ned for his transgressions."
"It's not that I haven't forgiven him. I understand the urge, I do, but I also got to that threshold and couldn't cross it." She said, shaking her head. "I don't know if I ever will be able to understand why, especially with what he's already told me. It just seems like an excuse and I'd rather he told me that he was horny than blaming it on something or somebody else."
"She does have a point, Ned," Dr. Roberts said, writing something down in his notes before glancing at him. "Blaming Toby for being an egotistical douche to get a rise out of you isn't why you wanted to sleep with that woman and it isn't why you kissed heart the bar before either. So what was the true reason? Do you even know?"
Ned didn't answer for a moment and in that time the therapist had gotten up to hand her a box of tissues. "I was angry and lonely, and as I said, Becca was easy. It wasn't like I could've shown up at our house to ask my wife after what Toby had just told me, even if it was only partly true." He said, mostly speaking to Dr. Roberts at first before turning toward her. "So I called the person who I thought would likely say yes and she did. I'm sorry it was her, Katie. I am. I wish I could take it all back."
As his voice trailed off, she looked down at her hands, focusing on the chipped polish on her thumb. "Well you can't and the idea of you having someone else share that intimate side of you makes me feel betrayed. The thought of another woman touching you like that is heartbreaking... but her? It makes me sick to my stomach every time I think about it." Katie fought to keep an even tone and to express her feelings without shouting or attacking her husband. But it was hard. "Did you even wear a condom? Because while I might've fooled around with Toby when I was horny and lonely, you fucked that girl, and even if you did wear a condom you still could've gotten her pregnant. What would have done then? Did you even think about it? About what that could do to me?"
"I did wear one, and we had sex maybe three... four times." He paused, considering. "But I… Shit. No. I didn't think about that. I should've thought about a lot of things. I'm trying now, and as I said, it will never happen again."
The therapist cleared his throat. "No matter how much you love each other and no matter how important we know compromise is in a healthy relationship, there are always going to be things that either of you might consider unchangeable. And that's okay." Dr. Robert explained. "Katie might need more time to forgive you entirely for what choices you made Ned, but then again she might never be able to and you might just have to move on from it anyway. But that needs to be the end of it. No more mentioning it, even jokingly and especially in anger. It's apparent that Katie feels uncomfortable when either of you talks about it."
"Okay," he replied immediately. "Baby, I'm sorry. I don't want to upset you and I won't bring it up again. I promise."
She nodded. "Thank you," she sighed.
"Alright." Dr. Roberts said glancing back down at his watch. "We are out of time, but you guys have made remarkable progress and I think that you two are now well-equipped to navigate most of the potential pitfalls and issues that may come up in your relationship. However, this is not to say that there won't be times that you'll shout at each other or encounter a situation that you just don't know how to resolve without arguing. Which is why I think we should continue to meet, only with less frequency. Maybe we make it every other week, or once a month—whatever the both of you feel comfortable with. Then, eventually, we'll drop it down to every three to six months, maybe once a year. Consider it just like a tune-up for your car—just because you think it's running great, it doesn't mean there aren't potential problems lurking under the hood."
They both laughed. "I'm on board," Ned answered. "I think it would be good for us."
"Same here," Katie echoed. "And maybe we can make the sessions a little less…formal. We can still come here to meet, but we can bring dinner. Besides, you've been so great with helping us to make our marriage work again, Dr. Roberts, that it would be nice for us to treat you to a meal. If that's not against your rules or anything," she added quickly.
The therapist chuckled. "I think that's a great idea, and you may call me Adam as well if you want. Why don't you the two of you talk it over and then call me when you're ready to make your next appointment?"
They eagerly agreed, and when the three of them rose to stand, she spontaneously leaned forward, giving Adam a brief hug. "Thank you," she told him quietly. "Thank you so much for giving us back to each other." Tears began forming in her eyes.
Adam shook his head. "You two did all of the hard work; I was just the one who helped you navigate the rough terrain. I must admit that you two are on the list of my favorite clients—because of that, I'm very happy that you've reconciled. I was rooting for you all along."
"We owe you so much," he replied.
"No thanks necessary, Ned," Adam said, showing them out. "Now, why don't you and your wife go and do something special to celebrate making it to this point?"
"That," he proclaimed, "is a great idea. What do you say, babe?"
She smiled and linked her fingers through his. "I would love to. A late dinner at our favorite Mexican place again, maybe?"
He raised their joined hands to his lips, brushing them across her knuckles. "Perfect."
As they walked out the door, Katie couldn't help but remember the first time they had entered this office. Back then, they had almost been different people, like strangers to each other, and she had felt such a sense of despair about the state of their marriage even if she wanted to be hopeful. Her anger had been all-consuming, as had her disappointment and heartbreak.
Even now after fighting about Becca, she felt better and weeks ago never would have imagined they'd get to this place of happy reconciliation. It would have seemed beyond the realm of possibility that they'd leave their session and go out for a fun dinner, where they'd laugh and joke and likely pass their forks back and forth across the table.
Katie looked over at her husband and marveled for the thousandth time at just how handsome he was. His blond hair was mussed and appeared almost pale in the moonlight, and his square jaw was lightly stubbled with his five o'clock shadow.
She shivered, unable to stop imagining him running that stubble against the sensitive place between her thighs. Suddenly, she couldn't wait until they got home.
Home.
It truly was home again now that Ned had come back.