It wasn't the hottest of days and I definitely felt the chill as the wind blew past me and made me wrap my cardigan tighter around me, as I waited for the delivery driver to finally find my address. I got a phone call about five minutes ago, a guy was asking for directions on how to get to the entrance of the flats and asked me to meet him out front. My decision of ordering only one or two things went out the window as to when I moved the crib into position, well when Simon and I moved the crib, it didn't look write so I ordered a dressing table, a swing, and whatever else I could convince myself that I needed right this minute. It was Sunday, I wasn't looking my best, the last thing I wanted to be doing was standing in public waiting for my delivery.

"You alright?"

My head whipped to the sound and just my look as I stood there with my hair in a bun, wearing slippers, and not wearing any makeup, the little family of three were walking in my direction. Peter, Simon, and Leanne, they looked like they were coming from Roy's, probably having a little family meal and I was glad they got on so well nowadays.

"Me? Yeah, just waiting for a delivery driver, he got a little lost."

Leanne looked me up and done giving me a once over and was clearly happy that she was looking better than me at this moment. I felt even more exposed in front of them and clenched onto the edge of my cardigan even tighter to attempt to hide myself and my bump that was getting larger every day. Peter and Simon either didn't notice my appearance or didn't want to make me feel more insecure than I already felt, they were just standing there.

"What have you ordered this time?"

Peter was trying to keep the conversation going, though even I could tell Leanne was desperate to get away, she practically scowled at her ex-husband as talked to me.

"Just some more furniture for the nursery area, getting ready you know. You know me, any excuse for shopping."

I was getting too excited and shopping for him was the best way I knew how to celebrate. It looked like Peter also read between the lines of what I was saying but nodded in any way in agreement, he smiled and nudged his son as he continued to speak.

"Yeah, because that went so well with the crib, right Si?"

"Yeah, well, he was a great help. If someone is there, get them to help you. There isn't anything wrong with asking for help Peter."

All three of us were smiling at the conversation, keeping it light as the atmosphere had slowly gotten better with Peter as each day passed. Leanne was getting impatient and walked forward ready to depart but she was stopped as the delivery van pulled up right in front of us. A blading man got out of the van and looked more annoyed than Leanne did at being here.

"You Carla Connor?"

"Yes, that's me."

He nodded at my statement and moved to the back of the van unloading three boxes, he took a picture, got back in his van, and left. Was he serious? He expected me, a pregnant woman, to carry those boxes up the stairs of the building to my flat, he couldn't even be bothered to speak to me more than confirming my identity. Peter, sensing my struggle, tried to jump in to help and I was actually grateful that they had bumped into me now.

"I'll help you get them up the stairs, don't worry, I don't you struggling, especially when you are carrying such precious cargo."

Before I could even reply a thank you or even reject his offer, Leanne visibly scowled at me and stomped in front of Peter with her back to him, so he had no choice but to pay her attention.

"Well, Si and I need to get going so if you're helping here, we'll see you later."

She didn't wait for a response as she strutted off down the street with Simon obediently following behind her until he caught up to walk next to her. When I looked at Peter to apologise, he just shrugged at me and moved over to the boxes, he told me to talk to the small one, which I assumed was the swing and after he placed one of the other boxes in the lobby, he carried up the remaining box. Even if he didn't want to admit it, I saw him struggle slightly with the box and I was glad he was here to help as I wouldn't be able to do it on my own.

"Why don't you get the kettle on, and I'll go and grab the last box."

Having my orders, I got to work – well, I walked over and flicked the kettle on, leaning against the counter as my hands rested on my bump. Right now, I didn't care how much weight I put on in the pregnancy, I was happy every time it grew, it made me feel proud that my body was doing this, my body was creating my little boy. It didn't take too long for me to hear the stomps of Peter's feet coming up the stairs and I realised that he probably meant for me to actually make the drinks instead of just warming the water, so I got to work.

Three boxes were balancing on the wall with each other, and Peter and I sat on the couch holding our mugs, not saying anything. We were in peaceful silence until I winced in slight pain.

"Are you ok?"

"Yeah. It's just… as much as I love feeling him move, I do not appreciate the kicks to my ribs."

"What? He's moving right now."

"Yeah… do you want to feel?"

He nodded his head repeatedly making him look like a nodding dog in a car and raced over the small space between us to kneel on the floor next to me and hovered his hand over my belly. Realising that he was out of his depth, I grabbed his hand and placed it on the spot where I just felt him move. Nothing. I waited, he waited, we waited. There, I felt him move internally and quickly pushed Peter's hand to the spot just in time to feel him kick. Peter had felt him move before, but every kick and movement was more forceful than the last, it told us how quickly he was growing.

"Wow."

"You have got one strong son Mr. Barlow."

"What can I say, he is going to have one hell of a kick in football."

It was moments like this that made me feel like we could actually do this, that we could actually have a baby together and be a healthy, normal, loving family. Peter looked close to tears, and I couldn't judge him, there had been many nights I cried in bed overjoyed that he was so active, and I could feel him so often.

It had been a few minutes since the movement had stopped and Peter finally gave up on feeling anything else, slowly pulling his hand away and coughing to cover his vulnerability.

"Right, we should probably get started on building then, or else we'll be here all day."

"What? Peter, you don't have to, honestly, I – "

"Come on, you need help, and my son isn't here for you to force him into work, you know there are child labour laws."

"Haha, very funny Peter, you are hilarious."

He was immensely proud at his own joke as he was smiling all the way over to the boxes as he read the sides and decided on opening the big box first, it was part one of two that I assumed was the dresser. As soon as the box opened and fully revealed what was inside, I was exceedingly glad that he offered his help as that was a lot of pieces, I wouldn't know where to begin.

We worked well together, I followed what he told me until he took over as I still wasn't doing it right until we had the frame of the drawers built. The piece had six drawers, three on either side and we got to work, building the drawers separately, just as I finished my first and Peter started his third, he started to speak, breaking the light-hearted conversation we had going on.

"You can tell me to mind my own business, but you and Nick, are you two still going out? On a break? What? I just what to know the dynamic for when our son is born."

He wouldn't meet my eye when he spoke, he was hiding something, but the question already had a lot for me to unpack, flowing his lead, I lowered my gaze and replied as honestly as I could.

"Me and Nick, we're not together anymore. It was a lot of drama with me and him, especially at the end, I couldn't see him moving past everything. So, I decided to put the most important man in my life first, my son – our son, he needs me and dealing with too much chaos isn't good for him, so I cut it out, simple as."

"Ok."

"Ok?"

"Yeah… I think you'll be an amazing mom; you don't need anyone or anything holding you back."

It was such a sweet comment and I blame my hormones as I started to tear up at the comment. It was hard to imagine me as a mom, I had put all my focus onto him so that I didn't think about myself as a parent once. If I really thought about me as a mom, I thought of a disaster, I remembered how I was with Ryan when he was a baby, I couldn't wait to get away from him. When I was a stepmom to Simon because he was difficult, I didn't try and I was glad when he was with Leanne, his mom. Kids were never in my plan, I never got far enough with my little girl to know what kind of mom I would be. Truthfully, I was terrified, from what I remember when Ryan was born and every baby since is that they cry a lot, they always need something, remember to support their head, boys will pee on you, make sure they are breathing, they are fragile, they –

This was going to be a disaster, how was I supposed to deal with this all on my own? Just like that, I swear to God that sometimes I believe Peter can really read my mind, he offered me an olive branch.

"I was just wondering – and feel free to say no, there's no pressure – but I was wondering for the first few days, you know when everything is new, maybe I could stay here, just on the couch or something. I know it's going to be super hard – it would be for anyone, not just you – I'm not saying that I will make it easier, but four hands could be better than two. Everyone says the new-born time is the hardest as everything is so new and the books, I read talks about how important it is for the mom to be rested and looked after too which you can't do if you are all alone – No, I mean you can, you can do anything, it might be better – no – easier with me. Sorry, I'm rambling, what I mean is that I would really like to be here as I wasn't when…"

He didn't need to speak the words out loud for me to understand.

"Like you couldn't be for Simon."

He looked miserable and I considered his offer. Did I want him to stay? What about if I got too used to his help and found being a single mother afterwards too difficult due to relying on him so much? Like he said though everyone said the newborn stage was hard and the books… wait books? He was reading parenting books? That tugged on my heartstrings almost as much as the admission of guilt for not being there when Simon was born, he was actually researching how to be a dad, to understand everything, I had never known him to read anything other than the paper. He was really changing to be a good dad and I felt so pleased with how far he had come, how far we both had in supporting each other, having this communication. Maybe being in such a good mood, reflecting influenced my words or maybe it was pure insanity, but I found myself agreeing.

"Maybe it would be good for us, both of us looking after him when he is so small, getting used to him and knowing him together so that it's easier when we are apart. Maybe. You would have to sleep on the couch as I don't have a spare bed and you can't stay here too long that we get in a routine with each other as then being single parents will be harder."

"Yeah sure – "

"- And if I change my mind about you staying over, no tantrums, no making me feel bad. Also, you lend me the parenting books, I haven't gotten any yet, maybe I should have a look at them."

He just smiled and nodded at me as he put together his last drawer for the dresser, knowing he had gotten what he wanted. Michelle would probably kill me when she finds out and shout that she could have stayed instead of Peter, as much as I love her, he deserved to be the one to help me adjust to my new life as a parent as his life was changing in the same way.

We stood back together, admiring the set of drawers perfectly put together after our hard work, no matter what Simon said, Peter was not that great at building, better than me? sure, but not great. It had a lot of room and according to that one lady on YouTube, babies need a lot of storage, you can never have enough. I also knew that I wanted to do a lot of shopping for outfits, I and Michelle were heading out one day this week and I already had at least three baskets full online that I needed to order. I was going a little overboard with the shopping, but I was excited.

"What's in the last box then?"

"Oh, that? It's just a swing, we can leave that."

"No, it's alright. I'll put it together, can I have another cup of tea?"

It all felt very domestic, me sitting on the couch holding my cup in between my hands, watching as Peter, the father of my child put together the swing in the living room of my flat. It was a weird feeling, one I was trying to ignore as Peter got up and showed me the swing, obviously proud at how quick he had been. The domesticity worsened when he joined me on the couch, took his cup in between his hands, like mine, and stared at my bump. His gaze was so intense that it almost made me feel self-conscious.

"I have a question."

"Ok? Go ahead."

"It's just something my dad said, he was talking about the baby when I told him it was a boy and he was talking about us being like the Barlow boys, you know, me, him, Si, and the baby. I told him you might be calling him a Connor, that is your last name, he said he didn't mean that he had to have our last name to be a Barlow boy, he was just because he was family. It got me thinking though, is he going to have your last name or mine?"

That was a question. One I didn't know how to answer.

"I don't know, I hadn't thought about it."

He had a point though; I could consider names until I was blue in the face, but his last name was also important. Being a Connor was what When my life turned around, I knew that being a Barlow was something he could share with his brother, his family as I didn't offer him much in that department.

"What do you think?"

"Me? I guess, selfishly, I want him to be a Barlow with me and Si, you know, the proper Barlow boys, but as my dad said, he doesn't have to legally be a Barlow to be a Barlow. If you want him to be a Connor, I understand, you will be his main caregiver – I'm not sure what it called but you know what I mean. I will stand by you, whatever you chose because it is your decision."

"Can you just give me some time to think about it?"

"Of course, there's no rush Carla, I just thought I would ask in case you had already decided."

"Thank you."

He glanced down at his watch checking the time, probably realising that he needs to get going, there wasn't anything else to do now in anyway.

"Hey, I know this is cheeky of me as I have already taken up enough of your time, but can I stay for a bit, Tracy is being a nightmare, we could watch a film or anything, I will even buy you lunch?"

Without thinking I answered.

"Sure"

Honestly, thank you guys so much for the support, I love reading your reviews, the past few chapters I started writing without a plan which has been fun but I'm going to start planning the rest of the story our soon, I would love to hear what you want to see.