More to come soon! Enjoy.
-Old Night
Avitus Parthas smiled, in spite of his disappointment. The thought of Vetra Nyx's expressions when speaking of her Sindri revealed more than she was willing to admit and it painted a pretty picture of happiness come and gone. He didn't begrudge his fellow turian's success at wooing someone like Nyx, but he did envy the man a little bit. The sheer amount of courage it must have taken to have opened a clinic for non-humans in Grennik must have been colossal. Reckoning with such a man must have been something, it was no wonder Vetra had so obviously fallen deeply in love with him.
Regardless, he wouldn't press Vetra. She was quite hurt still and her younger sister was, he feared, deeply disturbed by the whole ordeal. He was dying of curiosity but it didn't go that far as to investigate and pry. It felt rude to do so. Better to simply take things as they came and make the best choices and recommendations for the pair of them. And if something could happen with Vetra down the line, then so be it.
Avitus stepped by his mirror in his small but well furnished apartment and looked at his face.
I wonder what Sindri must have looked like. Probably massive if he was a veteran of the Relay 314 Incident. What kind of markings did he have?
His mandibles raised a few centimeters in a small smile. Shaking his head he exhaled and let out a little laugh.
I'm obsessing over this guy as much as Vetra does. Why is this bothering me so much?
The thought of Sid crossed his mind and the smile faded entirely.
Kid's growing up fast. I don't know what those savages must have done to Sindri but that girl's flipped over completely. The way she talks, it's like she thinks she's one of them. Who put it in her head that she could become Darskirr? Doesn't she understand that they hate us?
He'd only seen Sidera part her poncho a scarce handful of times when she wasn't scowling or sitting alone and gloomy, studying off the extranet. What he'd seen struck him as utterly bizarre. She was fit like she was training for boot camp every day. He'd bet his last credit it was not Vetra's doing, so the question remained; why was she doing it? Despite her utter recalcitrance to make friends or bond with anyone at school she was an exceptional student even if she was not bookish or intellectual. He'd never seen a young girl so disciplined and driven to complete her work or tasks.
Thinking of Vetra and pursuing something in the future while interacting with Sidera didn't sit well with him on an interpersonal level.
She was fast growing into an adult and had all the mental and physical signs she'd go far in life. Whatever she chose to do with herself.
And she held the world around her in nothing but contempt.
What happened to you, Sid?
A chime from his omnitool drew his attention away from the mirror. With a flick of his finger across the display the vacant static of an older mode of communication filled the void.
"Using a laptop again, Cloia?"
The voice came through, trilling and musical as he knew her.
"Why yes, Avitus! It's kind of a darling piece of equipment, human technology was so inventive even if inelegant. Besides, I think the sound quality adds something to a voice call. Wouldn't you agree?"
"Whatever you say. Listen, I've got one more coming to your house party."
"Nyx was it? Convinced her to come?"
"Yeah, I'll sort out the times and details with her but she gave me the go ahead."
"Oh, how nice! It's always refreshing to see a new face."
"It is isn't it? Listen, don't tell the others I said anything but I want to show her a good time. She came from Grennik a few years ago, the Darskirr did something to her old boyfriend. She's traumatized I think."
The click of a pair of mandibles came from the other end.
"Animals, the lot of them. No, they are lower than animals. We should have done away with them years ago when we landed in Mirrard and built this city."
"Easy, Cloia, easy. Calm down."
"I am calm. If the fucking Darskirr knew what's good for them they'd abandon their primitive ways and join the rest of their species in the modern world. Can you imagine what it must be like to be one of them? They think their struggles are noble when they did nothing but terrorize Mars and start a civil war."
"Short lived one as I understand it. Good thing too, they are tenacious."
A louder click made him flinch.
"Don't ascribe such a compliment to them. My uncle was killed in battle on Dubek."
"I know, Cloia."
"My uncle was tenacious. Captain Prosius Maxiion's last stand in Fulga River was the stuff of valor. Those cowards killed him in an ambush and didn't have the decency to respect the dead. The surviving platoon never found his head you know? Those monsters made off with it."
Avitus knew better than to interrupt his friend when she got started about the Darskirr. For a people so steeped in violence it was an easy thing to understand why so many veterans from Dubek and other theaters of war came to despise them so much. It didn't take much imagination either to consider why Vetra was so hollowed out by the experiences. And Sidera's commentary about them disturbed him. He didn't dare pry but he would put nothing really past the Darskirr. That hateful, primitive breed of human would do just about anything to a turian. He couldn't imagine what they would inflict to a pair of sisters if they dragged them to their lairs in the woods. Maybe they just murdered Sindri. But perhaps they'd done something more intimate to Sidera and now she was identifying with them out of guilt or some bizarre misplaced sense of belonging. Maybe they'd brainwashed her or broken her in some way that now she was compensating for her relative youth by seeking to strengthen her body and keep others at arm's length?
Vetra's face briefly flashed across his mind and he felt a little possessive sorrow.
What would she and Sid be like if they'd never gone to Grennik and lost their Sindri?
He couldn't guess, but he wanted to help both of them.
They deserved to be happy.
-0-
Sid sat in the living room floor of her apartment, legs folded and hands clasped in prayer as her yellow eyes focused intently on the candle in front of her.
"New Year's Pyre, Sid?"
"Same time every year, Vetra."
"Be kind, Sid. I'm just asking."
She hummed in thought trying hard to recall the words to the prayer. Gods help her, there was nothing in the extranet about them. Just lies about the Darskirr and their ways. Most of the words she remembered in her own way but not the floweriness of it, she thought it was poetic how the Darskirri language sounded. She wished dearly to hear what it must sound like to witness the prayers done in their native tongue. But sadly she'd have to make due with the little she had on hand. She hoped Sindri would be proud of her for the attempt.
"We are judged in life, by the hardships we defeat. In us and around us."
"We are judged after we die, for all the good things we leave behind."
"Today, I offer up all the bad stuff that should leave with the end of the year."
"The pyre burns, o' I pray, all throughout the night."
Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Vetra waiting patiently for her to finish. It was always like this, when she prayed. She didn't understand it but she'd come to tolerate it, Sidera knew. Sometimes she'd be drawn to her rituals when it was time. It reminded her of Sindri, she knew. It was just as well, missing him was something they shared. Except this time, she looked different.
Turning her head Sid narrowed her eyes at her older sister.
"What are you wearing?"
At this her sister raised her brow.
"I'm just going to go see friends. That's all."
"You wore that shirt during New Year's Pyre with Sindri."
Looking down at her chest the turian shrugged.
"Oh, this? You're right. Don't mind me, go ahead and finish then we can talk."
Something like jealous anger rose in her chest but she immediately reined it in and it showed on her face.
"You don't approve."
A chirping sigh tickled the back of her throat and she shook her head briefly.
"I'm not going on a date you know."
"Is it with Mr. Parthas?"
"No, why would you ask me something like that?"
"Because I've seen you talk to him a few times. He told you he is worried about me."
Vetra closed her eyes with a well of tired old sorrow briefly glimmering through them.
"We are both worried about you, Sid. And you know why."
Frowning, Sidera turned her head back towards the candle.
"Sid, there is nothing I could say to you that we haven't screamed at each other already since we left Grennik. But I want you to give some real thought to what you are going to do with yourself. You are turning fifteen years old in a few months and you'll be old enough to enlist in bootcamp."
"I'm not going to bootcamp."
"Oh, I know. Whatever ideas you have cooked up won't cut it if you can't take care of yourself. You need to be independent."
"So what? You'll walk out on me too, when I turn fifteen?"
A little frown adorned Vetra's face and she gently shook her head.
"I'm not walking out on you, Sid. I love you."
"You probably said the same thing to Sindri."
To Sid's surprise the barb went unchided and her sister didn't even flinch or grimace.
"Sid." her sister began.
Slowly she walked over to her sister and sat down by her place before the candle.
"I loved Sindri. I really did. But I have to look to the future and what I'm going to do with myself after you're gone. And yes, I know you are going to leave and I can't stop you."
The younger sister raised her eyebrows in mild surprise but her mandibles gave nothing else away.
"I never told you I'm leaving."
"Kiddo, I know you. I got a job and a place to live, you've been waiting to leave Kuov for the last three years. I'm on my feet and I don't need you taking care of me anymore. That's why I'm asking you to really give some thought to what you are going to do to take care of yourself after you leave this house."
No anger or frustration painted Vetra's concerns and it surprised Sid.
"Why are you being so nice about it?"
Vetra glanced at her younger sister then stared back into the candle.
"Because you are as stubborn as I am. And you are smart even if you lead with your heart more than your head sometimes. All I've ever wanted is for you to have a better life than I did. And I have to accept that sooner or later you are going to go make that life the way you want to make it. That and we need to figure out what you're going to do with this 'hobby' you have."
The pair sat together for a long moment, the flame danced audibly on the candle's wick in the silent apartment.
"I want to be Darskirr."
"Sid, no Darskirr is ever going to marry you."
"Would you have said no if Sindri asked you to?"
Shaking her head, Vetra's frown deepened with her limp mandibles.
"That's not the point of what I'm telling you, he would never have asked. It's pointless to even think about it now."
"That's not the point of what I'm asking you, would you have said yes?"
With a little grunt the older turian stood and rubbed the back of her neck, the words seemed to almost visibly catch in her throat and her mandibles drooped even more.
"Sid."
The younger sister stood and grabbed her older sibling's arm.
"Tell me the truth."
"Sid, enough. You're just making me sad now."
With reluctance she released her sister's arm and folded her elbows beneath her brother's poncho.
"I have to go, Avitus is waiting for me."
Sidera's gaze narrowed in annoyance then she plopped back onto her haunches and stared back into the candle.
"Just so you know, I'm not leaving you."
Slipping on her father's jacket, Vetra allowed herself a small smile.
"That's surprising. Considering how much you hate me." she barbed back.
Her younger sister did not correct her.
"You know he'll never love you as much as Sindri did, right?"
A genuine scowl deepened on Vetra's face and her mandibles splayed in an instant as she stood in her sterile apartment's doorway.
"You are such a little bitch sometimes, Sidera."
Gently the door closed and she was alone again before her candle. Grim satisfaction tugged at the corners of her mouth and she dredged up the words to the prayer she'd only just half remembered. Three years seemed like a lifetime ago.
If you don't atone for what you've done you'll never stop hurting.
A mean spirited smile tucked her mandibles away from her jaw.
I hope Avitus is a lousy boyfriend, he's such a pansy.
"We feed the fire, we fan the fire."
"Where stuff isn't clear, I'll be careful."
"When I'm not sure, I'll make sure."
"When I'm mad, I'll be steady."
"When I do something wrong, I'll make up for it."
"The pyre burns, o' I pray, all throughout the night."
I've tried hard to be good, Sindri. Would you bring me home if I found you? Of course you would, I think. Would you take Vetra back?
The girl's stomach growled and she thought of dinner. The riddle of atonement was a strange one.
"Even gods may die."
-0-
Nights in Kuov had grown on Vetra as the months turned into years. As a substitute for her walks in the woods she was surrounded by parks and neon lights, rich wooden doorways, porches and works of art. And music, there was always music playing somewhere. Melodies from centuries ago and many different species and more modern exemplars of the popular arts. The anonymity of city life had its appeal though she missed the sense of belonging she had once enjoyed. She could be anyone she wanted to be. Strolling through the infectious beats and quiet chatter of a hundred different conversations and half as many languages she noticed she drew the eye of many men and a few women. It pleased her in a way, to be noticed. But the feeling came like a haze, she didn't think much of it or anything really. She felt rudderless. There was no future, no mission, no point.
I'm kind of glad Avitus asked me to meet his friends. Really haven't done much of anything, Mike and Chyra at work are nice enough. They never invited me anywhere though.
With a glance at the figure keeping pace with her she looked at her own reflection in the black glass of a local lounge.
Oh yeah, I scowl. I've got resting bitch face, now I remember.
Stepping quickly down the magnetic rail way she checked her pouch for keys home, identification and hard credits.
The cool lights of the underground shifted in dazzling patterns giving the impression of being submerged under water. The distortions were comforting and fascinating.
It also made making out faces in a crowd rather hard.
"Vetra!"
There he is.
Smiling with mandibles splayed out was Avitus, towering over the humans and salarians that stood like little isles of social clicks awaiting the tube train.
"Hey, Avitus."
"I'm really glad you decided to come with me. You'll like the gang, they are really good people."
"Don't doubt it. You came kind of spruced up, didn't you?"
With a pleased shrug the man before her dusted off his spotless sleeves. He really did look good.
"I'm not just a teacher you know. When I was younger I used to work part time as a bouncer in a high end lounge here in Kuov. They wanted all their staff to have a certain appearance, you know? Learned how to clean up good."
"You do. Makes me wonder if I underdressed for the occasion?"
Avitus smiled earnestly and stood parallel to her, shoulder to shoulder looking at the empty space between platforms and waited for the rail car yet to materialize.
"You probably did, all spats and army boots for you at the PTA meetings."
Vetra exhaled a hollow laugh.
"Yeah, spats and boots. That's me."
"Don't sweat it, Cloia is very relaxed. We're going to her place. If we make plans to bounce to a lounge, I'll be the first to warn you."
"I appreciate that."
In twos and threes more people entered the tube station and crowded around the pair. Gradually each island of friends and acquaintances were joined in close proximity by other islands or singleton strangers to fill the available free spaces on the station.
"I promise you'll have fun, it'll do you some good to be with your own kind for a change."
"Oh yeah?" Vetra began as she awkwardly baby stepped like everyone else to fill the train car once it noiselessly entered the station.
"Of course, why wouldn't- oh excuse me, sorry about that, sir- it do you some good? You know, just to be with folks who understand you without having to say a word. A familiar face, you know?"
"I'm going to a stranger's house, the friendliest face I have right now is yours."
Awkwardly, the crowd packed into the tube system like sardines and everyone looked to some corner or another looking to avoid eye contact. Gallantly, Vetra noticed, Avitus had jockeyed her a position against the flexible break between cars. She could comfortably lean up against the flexible elbow of the transport and only have people on her front instead of having someone standing right behind her. Now all she really had to look at was Avitus looming in front of her. The proximity was strangely intimate.
"Not a bad face to have, could be worse. Could be a vorcha's."
At his Vetra smiled good naturedly.
"Spirits, don't talk about vorchas. I used to work with one in shipping and supply years ago. Old vorcha liked to smell the breath of those of us who slept when we pulled multiple consecutive twelve hour shifts at the warehouse."
"You're kidding."
"Nope! That weirdness aside he was pretty benign. Little creeper. Learned he loved peanut butter, he was pretty good with me after I brought him a jar."
A lull in conversation made Vetra look around at the glancing eyes of those around her, eavesdropping on their conversation because of proximity. Avitus was practically on top of her, a little bump in the rails would press his chest on hers. He was close enough she could smell him.
"Are you wearing cologne, Avitus?"
"Now who's being creepy, Vetra?"
"Just asking, you invited me to a relaxed party at a friend's place and you're dressed to the nines. Makes me think there's a girl there you want to impress."
"Me? Nah, I'm choosy and I try very hard not to overstep my bounds."
"My, what a gentleman. Especially since you've got me cornered against a wall."
"I didn't do it on purpose! I just thought you'd appreciate having a little comfort in a cramped space."
Despite the confidence he outwardly portrayed he did blush briefly and Vetra noticed. Avitus was fun to wind up.
"I'm just drilling your shinplates, Avitus. And I appreciate you're not pushing."
Scratching his crest and adjusting his collar, Parthas cleared his throat.
"Yeah, well. I won't lie to you Vetra. I'm in a strange position, metaphorically speaking. It's not that I'm not tempted, I just don't want you to think I'm taking advantage of you."
Turning he blue eyes onto his own, Vetra stared at him for a long moment before inclining her head with her mandibles tucked tight to her chin. A sign of acceptance.
"Yeah, well. Thanks."
"For what?"
"For being tempted. It's nice to feel wanted, you know?"
Swallowing hard and turning his gaze over at a particularly interesting section of stainless steel he nodded in turn.
"You're welcome."
"Get a room you two."
Rolling his eyes at the asari who nudged him with her elbow on the way out of the compartment, Avitus waved her away.
"It's not like that."
As quickly as the good mood had come it was gone.
She reminds me of Amanda. I wonder how she is?
"Mind's back on Sindri, isn't it?"
"I-uh. No, I was thinking of a former friend of mine. Miss her sometimes. It's something she would say to Sindri and I. She pushed us to get together in the beginning when we both started realizing we were drawn to one another."
"Ah, I see. May I ask you one thing about him?"
Frowning she nodded.
"What happened to him?"
A long, dry silence permeated the space between us and Vetra's eyes seemed to hollow out as her energy seemed to deflate.
"I don't know."