Katsuki's currently crouched over a display of Nerf guns. His eyes are fixed on the alarmingly accurate design of the shooters. After another moment of consideration, he decides they're probably not appropriate gifts for an infant. He shakes his head as he rises. Now he understands why his mom never bought him these when he was younger.
When he looks around, Ochako's on the other end of the aisle with her back turned on him. He walks over to see she's staring down at her phone.
"Okay, I love her, but Tsu's baby is not cute." she says, showing him the screen. "She keeps sending these pictures to the group chat and I don't know how to respond. Like, I don't wanna lie but,"
"Oh, Deku's kid?" he says, squinting at the photo, "Yeah, she's fugly like him."
"No, like, it's weird. Both Tsu and Deku are cute, so where did this… uncute baby come from?"
"No, they're not."
"Yes, they are."
"Froggy's not cute."
"Froggy's so cute." she corrects.
"Honestly, the nicest thing I can say about her is that she isn't ugly, but Deku's straight up hurt."
"Alright," she says, holding a finger up, "First of all, Tsu is super adorable—"
"For a toad, maybe."
"Hush." She pokes him in the chest with that same finger. "And Deku's not bad-looking. I was honestly expecting their combined cuteness to make a decent baby, but no."
He takes another look back at the screen and can somehow see Deku in the newborn's crumpled frown. "Damn, she kinda looks like Voldemort."
"Oh my god," she cups her mouth. While she's still distracted, he grabs her phone and tucks in into the side pocket of his cargos.
"Let's get back to business," he says, redirecting her attention to the shelves in front of them. "It's almost six."
They were buying a gift for Eijirou's son. His first birthday was tonight. Katsuki doesn't know how the time flew by. He could've sworn they were at the hospital bringing Mina congratulatory balloons and roses and Percocet just yesterday.
They've seen each other sporadically since the birth of their son. Eijirou complains about how little time he has, and Katsuki complains about how much work he has.
"We're never having kids," she tells him, scoping out a few Lego sets.
He peers over her shoulder to get a better look at the one she picked up. "God, fuck no."
"Ages three to five," she reads before setting it back by the others. "Dang it."
He blinks back up at the shelves. He briefly considers a demonic-looking cabbage patch kid but stops when he realizes how much shit Eijirou would flip if he saw his son playing with dolls.
"What the hell do you even buy a one-year-old?"
He can't come up with anything the boy won't outgrow or discard within the next year.
Ochako takes his hand and starts walking him out of the aisle. "I was thinking clothes, but maybe we should just get something for his parents."
"Like what?" he asks, turning the corner with her. "A box of condoms?"