Author's Note: I had a strong sense of nostalgia for Saiyuki and binged the manga and here we are. I really just want to have fun revisiting this series through using an OC that goes along with the Sanzo Party's journey even if it's just indirectly. Hope you enjoy this fanfic and know that it's all in good fun (and feelings!)

"What can nourish my soul
If the time I shared with you will be no more? "

The bright flames from the gas stove flickered and danced across the view of the black cat that sat patiently on the top of the refrigerator. A tall man with dark and unkempt hair, dressed in light robes stood and stirred the pot, humming some unknowable tune as he cooked. There were only a few lights on in the house that they lived in. Outside, through the window, they only had a view of the trees of the forest and even farther in the distance tiny lights of the local village could barely be seen as it was late in the evening and they began to blink out of existence.

The man glanced outside and murmured.

"We're in Chang'an again."

He turned his attention back to the pot.

"You can tell by the roofs. We've been rotating through the East more often haven't we?"

He lifted a tasting dish to his lips and smacked his tongue. Another pinch of salt was added to the pot.

"Hopefully we'll find ourselves somewhere in the West again. There are some ingredients that are easier to get there. Chang'an is nice though. Plenty of produce. Nice people. Some nice demons."

The black cat yawned in response, giving a disinterested look at the window and then back to her friend and his task.

This was their ritual; the human cooked, the cat would watch. She enjoyed watching her human companion concoct different meals from humble ingredients that would transform under his hands. How many years had they been doing this now? The cat had lost count, but lately she wondered how long this would last.

Lately, his movements through the house were sluggish.

His hands trembled.

He was lost in thought more often, staring at nothing, forgetting that she was even there next to him as his feline friend.

Life was seeping from him and the cat could do nothing, but hope that perhaps tonight would just be like any other.

Simmering inside the pot was a small portion of creamy white rice porridge. Gentle scents of ginger and savory seafood broth wafted through the kitchen. He reached over to grab a handful of roughly chopped green scallions and sprinkled it into the porridge. Bending over, the man inhaled and exhaled deeply, and then nodded, pleased with the results.

"Hm. Just about done."

The man's breath hitched and he raised a hand to cover a rough cough. Hearing that, the cat raised its head in concern. He noticed and grinned through his fingers.

"Ha. You're worried for me? This old man is flattered."

The cat's yellow eyes glowered at him.

Taking no heed of her displeasure, he proceeded to take two shallow bowls and scoop a portion of the rice porridge into each. He made sure that the smaller one had an extra helping of white fish and a large shrimp. With a bowl in each hand, he beckoned the black cat with a gesture with his head to follow him.

"C'mon. Let's sit on the outside corridor together."

She leaped from her perch and landed gracefully on her feet, silently following the slow shuffling feet.

There was a beautiful full moon tonight. He loved eating outside while being bathed in the white pallid light.

"Careful, alright? It's still hot. And you're a cat after all. Sensitive tongue and all that."

He sat down, groaning as if supporting his own body had taken all his strength and he placed the rice porridge in front of the cat and kept his serving with its large spoon in his lap. With a heavy sigh, the man leaned back against the sliding door and gazed up at the moon hanging in the sky. His hand would move, scooping some rice porridge into his mouth.

The black cat sat next to him as her portion cooled down. She wasn't watching her food, nor was she enjoying the moonlight. Her eyes were only on him. He noticed of course and his brows furrowed.

"Oh? Are you waiting for me to finish? You should start on yours you know. Cold porridge is no good. I even gave you the best bits."

Fuzzy dark ears twitched and the cat looked away. The man chuckled and set down his spoon.

"Fussy, fussy," he mused. The cat did not reply. She didn't use her words much.

"Ah, well I can't be too harsh on you. Not when… Well." His eyes closed.

"There's no use trying to act tough in front of you huh? Not after all these years."

Ensuing silence made the cat look back at the man. His eyes remained closed, but his chest still rose up and down and his quiet breathing put her at ease. She waited for him to speak some more, but there was nothing.

The cat decided to finally try the seafood porridge. Her tongue lapped out, scraping the side of the bowl and then nibbled a bit of the white fish. It was a little salty, but tasty nonetheless.

She continued to eat, lapping up some porridge here and gnawing a piece of shrimp or fish there. Her companion did not make any noise for several long minutes. The cat thought he had truly fallen asleep until he stirred from his impromptu nap. He watched her eat the meal and made a crooked and fond smile at the sight. Instinctively, the man reached out and rested his hand on her back.

She froze and stopped eating.

His hand petted her awkwardly at first and his fingers clumsily scratched her back. Despite that, the cat didn't hiss or dissuade him in any way.

"I'm not too good at this," he said apologetically. "But I hope you're okay with me. I know I didn't bother at all and you're not exactly a pet."

Fingers moved up to scratch gently behind her ears. To his surprise, the cat closed her eyes and purred softly.

Neither of them was ever particularly affectionate. They had found each other and lived together, but being next to someone did not mean that he had ever improved at being human. Isolated with his home and this mysterious feline, he simply existed without much thought. She knew this about him and accepted it. Being with him was lonely, but peaceful compared to whatever life she had before and she never thought about changing anything about him. But here he was, showering her with his touch and it pained the cat to finally realize that she had always wanted this.

He stopped a bit, just so he could eat slowly and in between bites, he would resume petting the cat. She had long stopped eating, just waiting and indulging in the contact. It didn't take long for him to finish his meal, but he didn't leave his spot. Hours passed and both man and cat sat in their place enjoying each other's company without any words.

The moon had begun to wane, but they were in no hurry to leave. The indulgent cat began to feel the concern creep into her mind again. Before she could stand up and lead her friend to his bedroom, he spoke up.

"I'm leaving the house to you."

It wasn't a random thought that came out of nowhere. She was able to recognize those. When he made up his mind, he was clear and concise and the finality of it was scaring her. The cat moved closer to his lap looking up at him. He continued as he kept his eyes on the fading moon.

"I prolonged my life too long and you know that. All that studying, all the work I put into making sure I would last long enough to see everything there is to see is kinda… Well, it wasn't invaluable. I even had fun sometimes especially after you came along."

He felt a paw push his knee. The cat was confused, pressing him for more answers in her own way.

"It's like I said. I'm leaving the house to you. Don't worry about where it'll go and how it'll keep moving. Not much Heaven can do about it since we never meant any harm and it's literally just for travel," he said reassuringly.

"You can read and you're sharper than you let on, a fast learner. You're safe within these walls. No human or demon should be able to cross without permission and I've already passed that on to you. And you know how to sell stuff after watching me all these years although I have enough money saved up to last you a long while. Everything's taken care of, you'll see. You're real lucky I never married," the man said laughing at his own pitiful joke. The cat pushed his knee with both of her front paws. He shook his head at her.

"Listen… I'm serious when I say it's been too long. I'm at my limit. And what I've done to live was nothing short of heretical. I didn't deserve anything, much less to live."

The cat hissed and turned away, sulking.

"... Hey."

She felt his hand on her head again. The warmth from his fingers melted away any anger she had, but not the pain his affection was giving her.

"... For what it's worth…"

Her ears were scratched and her back stroked. Her inky black fur shimmered in the last rays of moonlight.

"... I'm glad to have met you."

The petting began to slow down and the cat slowly shifted so that her back wasn't turned to him. His voice began to lower into a faint whisper.

"... The meals were more… delicious when you started to live with me."

The cat nestled her head against the palm of his hand, reciprocating the sentiment as best as she could. As the night sky slipped away to give way to the dawn, the cat moved closer to him until she was able to rest her head against his leg.

His hand went slack.

The cat didn't look up.

With the moon gone, the rising sun replaced it and a sliver of sunlight cast itself onto the corridor. A woman with long dark hair had taken place of the cat, her head laid against the leg of the man whose hand covered the top of her head and her whole body shook as she gripped the cloth of his robe. Chirping birds and crowing roosters heralded the arrival of the day, but she could only hear her own heart beating rapidly against her chest.

"Why… Why couldn't you wait just a bit longer?"

She gasped and a painful sob followed her words. Tears dripped down her cheeks creating dark spots on the floor.

"You didn't even wait for me to… What am I supposed to do now?" the woman cried burying her face even further into his lap. He couldn't answer and now he would never give her one. As his hand slipped down from her head, she wailed even harder.

"Come back… Come b-back! I don't know… I don't…!"

As the sun rose further up into the sky, the black cat continued to mourn the death of the man who used his last moments to share a meal with her. He left this world peacefully and when she was able to look up at his face, she could see there was a trace of a smile despite the hollowness of his open eyes. And then she cried, and cried, and cried some more, alone with the crippling fear in her heart.

"I don't know how to be alone anymore."

Years later...

A tortured priest found a caged creature with golden eyes.

The golden-eyed boy found freedom and his reason to live.

A half-breed found a man who wanted to die.

And the man turned demon, who had nothing to live for, continued to live.

The cat would not see any of these tainted people until she was finally able to pick herself up and live for the sake of the only friend she had ever known. The Heavens would not always witness this small phenomenon, but perhaps it was not going to be a special encounter to begin with. In a world engulfed by chaos, no one would think there would be a place to return too...