Ukraine felt her blood run cold, her mind racing with uncertainty of what her sister would do next. It was obvious to her now that she had dug up something that was not meant to be seen.
With her face still frozen with shock she turned to look at the shrine once more. How could she even begin to explain her way out of this? Act like she wasn't just gawking at this super personal and intentionally hidden possession?
"Sestra," Natalya called out once more, more demanding and seeping with a combination of fear and rage.
Having her attention brought back Ukraine faced her sister with a pale face. Quickly jumping up to her feet and stumbling over her words. "I am umm, well I uh am looking for the dirty clothes. Da, I was figuring you having not left the room had been leaving quite a mess."
She tried to eke out a pleasant smile to ease the tension, but her sister's demoralizing frown didn't let up, in fact it actually worsened.
Another shock of fear struck through Ukraine, which turned to terror as Natalya marched toward her. She barely had enough time to scramble out of the way before her sister was shoving past her and getting down in front of the shrine.
Cowering behind the closet door she watched as Natalya inspected her shrine. Seeing things had moved she turned an eye to Ukraine, the heavy dark bags under them making it so much scarier.
After moving things back in their rightful spot she started hastily covering up the secret compartment, cursing under her breath and flashing numerous glares at her sister.
Despite her fear Ukraine's curiosity was peaked, putting her own safety at severe risk as she suddenly had an uncontrollable urge to ask, "sestra, do you like America?"
For a very brief moment Natalya paused, but then went back to hiding the shrine even faster than before. "Nyet that's ridiculous, why would I like a disgusting pig like him?"
That instant of hesitation was a dead giveaway, not that it wasn't already obvious from the entire damn shrine frantically being hidden.
Gasping, Ukraine covered her mouth with her hands as she became filled with disbelief and strange exhilaration.
"Oh my goodness, you do like him..." she muttered behind her hands, enraging Natalya as she rose up and stomped toward Ukraine. "Excuse me?! I do no-hrrrmnm!"
Ukraine interrupted her by wrapping her up in a tight hug, pressing Natalya's face to her chest and spinning around with a giddy laugh. "My little sestra is having the crush! This is the most exciting."
Stopping her spinning for a second she sweat-dropped and gave a more nervous chuckle. "Well, the shrine is slightly creepy... but I still am having the great happiness for you."
Ukraine began to spin again, but Natalya slipped out from her arms and pushed away. Ukraine didn't look too upset though, it seemed she was about ready to jump for joy.
"Sestra stop, I do not like hi- "wait, are you two already on the dates?" Ukraine cut her off in a low whisper. "Sestra!" Natalya finally yelled, her anger boiling over the surface.
"I don't like him and we aren't dating, I fucking hate everything about him! His voice, the gluttony, that dopey... smile, his. . ." She trailed off, her face dropping as she started staring off into space with an unreadable expression.
Growing worried, Ukraine reached forward and touched her sister's shoulder, making them flinch but working in getting their attention. "I don't like him," Natalya repeated as confidently as possible. "Now get out."
"But what about the shrine, and the piece of jacket and hair?" Ukraine wondered as Natalya put their hands on her shoulders. "And the pictures?"
Natalya grumbled and began pushing Ukraine toward the door. "Those are nothing, leave." Ukraine was having none of that. Stepping away she turned and pointed toward the closet. "Those things are not the nothing. I am knowing you, that shrine is only reserved for something most special. Sestra, what is going on?"
Crossing her arms Natalya looked away in defiance. "Nothing. I told you already there's nothing between us. The only reason I was even in his country was because of big brother. So just leave it and get out."
It's so obvious she likes America, so why is she denying it? Sure she may be stubborn and not want others to know, but surely she understands that Ukraine is already convinced.
Stepping a little to the left Ukraine tried to face her sister head on, but she turned further, refusing to show her eyes.
Ukraine found this particularly odd, the whole time her sister has been distant and mopey she's refused to face people, something the normal Natalya would do fearlessly. This left Ukraine uneasy. Was her sister, Belarus, scared?
Taking a slow step forward Ukraine stared with increasing concern, yet unbridled wonder. "Did. . . did something happen?"
Another hesitant pause. She swore she saw Natalya trembling. "Nyet. We aren't together so how could anything happen anyway?"
What happened? So much happened, so much she couldn't break it down and explain if she wanted to. In only a couple months she's made so many memories and experienced things she never thought she'd do or enjoy.
Slipping into these memories, as she's done very often lately, she completely forgot her sister was there. She didn't mean to, but whenever she thinks of Alfred she can't help but reminisce.
From inside a constricting feeling began to take hold of her heart, squeezing painfully tight as her heart started pounding. It was a brutal and familiar indicator of what was coming next, she was starting to lose control over herself and her emotions, she was about to breakdown.
Noticing the mood change instantly Ukraine leaned forward, catching a peek of Natalya's eyes which were glued to the floor and wide with fear.
"G-Get out!" Natalya demanded as she lowered her head further to hide her eyes. Not liking Ukraine defying her commands she turned and shoved her, nearly knocking them over.
Marching forward she continued forcibly pushing while shouting, "get out! Get out! GET! OUT!"
Successfully getting Ukraine to the door this time she shoved them hard out of the room, then grabbed the doorknob and swung the door closed.
Just before it closed fully Ukraine blocked it with her foot and pushed back against it. "Sestra, what is wrong?! Be letting me in, please!"
"N-N-Nyet. I t-told you to go," Natalya tried to shout, but she couldn't control the volume of her voice anymore.
Through the door Ukraine could feel her sister shaking, she needed to get to the bottom of this right now. While she has a disadvantage in strength, her sister was growing weaker by the second.
"Dammit go, leave me alone!" Natalya ordered while leaning against the door, knowing she was about to hit her breaking point.
Ukraine pushed back, refusing to leave. Little by little she was able to overpower her sister and crack the door open a few inches, enough to peer through and see her sister on the other side.
Stopping her push forward Ukraine's eyes widened and her jaw dropped. "Sestra, you're..."
Reaching a hand up to her cheek Natalya pressed against her skin, feeling a warm liquid cover her fingertips. She was already crying.
In distress she stumbled backwards as she stared at the liquid on her fingers. Why is she so pathetic, why can't she stop crying? She needs to get her sister away.
Raising her head she prepared to go back and slam the door closed, but her sister had already opened it and was now in the room once again, looking back at her with a troubled face.
Natalya couldn't hold back anymore as her tears came out in large globs, blinding her vision and preventing her from seeing Ukraine coming closer.
Feeling a hand touch her Natalya recoiled and flew back from her sister, tripping over herself and falling down. "Sestra are you alright?!" Ukraine asked as she reached out again.
"D-Don't t-touch me! G-G-Go away!" Natalya pleaded as she crawled away. Ukraine stayed put. The two stared each other down, unmoving and silent, until the lump in Natalya's throat got worse reminding her she was breaking.
Putting her hands to her face she started to sob, raising her knees up so she had another layer to hide behind. "Why c-c-couldn't you ju-just leave?!" She questioned before the fit of sobs completely took over.
Standing above her crying sister Ukraine felt horrible. Hesitant to move down and touch Natalya again she looked around trying to see what she could do to make things better.
Spotting the opened bedroom door she walked over and locked it, it's best if no one else sees this. Especially if it is about Alfred, she wouldn't hear the end of it if Russia found out.
Going back over to her sister she slowly sat down, not wanting to alarm them. Cautiously she held a hand out, moving ever closer to the other's shoulder. At the moment of contact Natalya jolted hard, causing Ukraine to flinch away as well.
Waiting a moment to calm down and assess her sister's reaction she began to move again, placing her hand back on the shoulder without Natalya moving away.
Seeing they were accepting of the contact, or at least too distraught to care, Ukraine moved closer and curled both her arms around Natalya's back, pulling her into a deep hug.
Natalya stilled, not sure how to react. It was Ukraine's fault this breakdown even happened, and yet this hug... why was a simple hug from her sister filling her with such a feeling of calm and comfort?
Covering her mouth she began to weep quietly once more, curling deeper into a huddle and giving in to the embrace.
Raising a hand up Ukraine pet the back of Natalya's hair, brushing through it as she whispered comforting words to her. "Shhh. It is alright, it is alright."
Natalya clung to Ukraine like her life depended on it, like she was some sort of anchor that was keeping her from falling further into despair.
For a while Ukraine wasn't sure what else to do, it's been so long since she's had to comfort Natalya she nearly forgot what it was like. So for a good twenty minutes she just sat and let her sister get everything out of their system.
Eventually Natalya had stopped bawling, reduced to mere whimpers and sniffles. Only after then did Ukraine say anything more. "Would you be liking to move onto the bed? It is certainly more comfortable than floor."
Giving a slow nod Natalya agreed, latching on as Ukraine raised both of them up to their feet. Slowly guiding Natalya to the bed Ukraine laid them down before getting on as well, sitting upright near the pillows and adjusting herself so her sister could lie against her lap.
Now in a comfortable position she began brushing Natalya's hair again while she tried to think of how to formulate her next question. While it's more likely to irritate her sister Ukraine figured it was best to be blunt and get it all out there.
"It is most obvious that whatever happened had to be doing with America. Is it having to do with your feelings for him?"
From under her hand she could feel Natalya's whole body tense up. Opening her mouth Natalya began to speak, but Ukraine cut her off. "There is not the point in hiding it anymore. Whether you are saying it or not I already am knowing."
Closing her mouth Natalya turned her head away, hiding the grief and humiliation on her face. "Da, it is because of him."
Natalya sounded completely dead inside, worse than Ukraine has ever seen, and that includes all that's happened with Russia the past few months. And yes also Natalya's breakdown phone call from the alley in Boston.
It honestly made Ukraine want to cry, but she knew she had to remain strong if she wanted to make Natalya feel better.
Collecting herself she gave a small smile. "Could you be telling me what happened?" She requested as gently as possible.
Pulling her knees up to her chin Natalya got into a tiny ball, as if trying to somehow hide herself from the memory.
"I was trying to get him to become one with me..." she paused, tears starting to fall as she remembered his face, enraged with her and full of sadness and betrayal. "...he said nyet."
"Oh sestra," Ukraine said in deep sorrow as she rested a hand on the top of her sister's head. Natalya's mouth wobbled as more tears formed, preventing her from speaking further.
"I am most sorry for you... but you cannot keep doing this. Not everyone is wanting to become one, it is not good to be forcing them," Ukraine advised, to which Natalya scoffed.
"That's not it. It's not like with big brother, America does- did. . . he did like me," she clarified. That word felt awful in her mouth. Did.
Hunching her shoulders she continued with the story, despite the pain it was bringing her to do so. "He confessed his love to me, we were about to kiss. . . just for me to fuck it all up right at the last second."
"What did you do?" Ukraine asked curiously. Despite asking about dating earlier she never actually expected Alfred to reciprocate Natalya's feelings. Then again this is if she didn't interpret Alfred being nice as love.
"I intruded on his personal life, did stuff I wasn't supposed to do, said stuff that didn't need to be said. I promised him I wouldn't tell anyone what happened. Not that he cares, he hates me now anyway," Natalya said as she pulled a blanket up to her face, a dark feeling creeping up in her once again.
As Ukraine tried to speak a stifled cry interrupted her, frightening her as Natalya started to shake again, covering the bottom of her face with the blanket.
"I love him so much!" She wailed, feeling her heart break all over again. In quick response Ukraine pulled Natalya up into a hug, her sister wrapping their shaky arms around her waist and burying their head into her stomach.
"Why can't I be loved? I just want to be loved! America cared about me, he truly loved me, and yet even then I end up with nobody! Why?!" She shouted into Ukraine's stomach, kicking her feet around like a child having a tantrum.
Ukraine couldn't utter a single word before Natalya was screaming again. "He made me so happy, we were so happy! Around him I felt special, like I was the center of the world, he called me his best friend. I wanted to spend every second with him, I wanted to become his one and only, and I... I wanted to get married! We were going to spend our lives together, I could even picture what our children would look like."
A watery smile weakly pulled her lips up as she imagined what her future kids would look and act like. Thinking of a childish boy like Alfred raising children of his own made her want to laugh, even if he had proven himself competent with Peter.
"We'd first have a boy, with my hair and eye color and that stupid cowlick America has. I know despite having a cold and cruel exterior he would be a complete momma's boy. He'd also be the handsomest boy on the planet, and he would be named Nikolai. Then we would have a girl. She'd have the same looks and energy as her father, and beautiful golden hair that I'd spend hours brushing and styling. I don't know what her name would be, that's probably something I'd leave up for America to decide."
Ukraine sat speechless for a bit, somewhere between impressed and disturbed with how far ahead they were thinking. "Wow... you are really in the love with him."
Natalya slowly nodded, her tears soaking into Ukraine's shirt. "Da. Maybe more than big brother, I'm not quite sure." Ukraine found that a little unbelievable, though the love seemed incredibly real.
Giving it a moment to let everything sink in, Ukraine finally voiced her own opinion. "Are you really thinking America is hating you? That is not sounding like him. Especially if he is having the feelings for you."
Natalya sighed to herself as she untangled from around the waist, flopping over onto her side and staring off blankly.
"You weren't there, you don't know how angry he was, the look he gave me. It couldn't be anything else."
Natalya truly had no optimism whatsoever, though with how hard this has damaged her Ukraine couldn't really blame them.
"I am not thinking he hates you. Sure he may be upset with whatever it is you had done, but hate is seeming like too much."
Natalya rolled her eyes, knowing exactly what Ukraine was about to say. "Just be taking Japan for the example."
"They hated each other before but now they're best friends. I know," Natalya explained before Ukraine could.
Ukraine looked at her oddly but smiled warmly. "Da exactly. He will be coming around, you will see."
Letting out an unconvinced exhale Natalya stared angrily at the ceiling. "Sure he will." Growing afraid of the energy Natalya was giving off, Ukraine scooted away and laughed nervously.
"Let us be moving away from the bad memories for now. Maybe instead you can be telling me about the good ones?" She requested.
Natalya's frown remained as she crossed her arms again. "All those "good" memories are the bad ones."
Ukraine made an O shape with her mouth and nodded awkwardly. "I see... but, could you be telling me anyway? I am most curious to be knowing."
Her sister considered it for a while, sighing audibly and shrugging her shoulders. "You already know enough. You'll probably just turn around and tell big brother anyway."
"Sestra I would not be doing that I am promising!" Ukraine denied, shaking her head for added effect.
"Whatever," Natalya grumbled, refusing to say more beyond that. "If I may," Ukraine spoke up. "I had already been keeping the secret about the whereabouts of you two. I have not and will not be telling our brother anything, I can be assuring you of that."
Natalya didn't respond, only rolling her head to the side and staring straight into her sister's eyes. Ukraine stared back down into hers, wanting to show that she was being truthful, though after a while she didn't want to look anymore. Why hadn't her sister blinked yet?
Sighing again Natalya rose up and sat on the bed, putting her chin on her knees and wrapping her arms around her legs. "What do you want to know?" She mumbled flatly.
Excitedly Ukraine crawled around Natalya and sat opposite of her at the end of the bed. "Okay. How about... when had you been discovering you liked America."
Natalya took a while to respond, both with trying to figure out her answer and removing herself from her dark headspace.
Smiling gently she remembered how ridiculous that memory was. "I'm not sure when feelings actually began, I think I denied them for a while. When I finally realized, however, was when we were spending a day at the beach together."
"Oh I am thinking America had been mentioning that to me briefly. You had been with little Sealand, da?" Ukraine wondered, leaning forward with interest.
Natalya nodded, though she couldn't help but feel a little jealous Alfred had talked to Ukraine. "And America's micronation too. The four of us went out for ice cream, where Sealand went overboard and added every topping available." That made her smile a little more, Peter was so adorably innocent.
"I told America I rarely ever went to beaches, so of course like an annoying child he teased me saying I couldn't swim," she sneered while making Ukraine chuckle, earning them another glare.
"He challenged me to prove him wrong, which I did, but regardless he said my technique was ass and offered to teach me how to swim properly."
Leaning even closer Ukraine nodded her head slowly. "And? What had been happening next?"
Natalya placed her hands on her waist and turned red, still able to vividly remember the sensation of Alfred's warm hands on her.
"He gave me instructions and taught me what to do. Then when I started to feel confident he let me go off by myself, then after that he gave me a new challenge to swim far out to those buoy things then back. I can swim better now by the way, so you and big brother can't make fun of me anymore."
Ukraine nodded with a big smile on her face, that was until Natalya balled up her hands and displayed an evil countenance.
"But when I finished the challenge America had disappeared. Looking for him I found him off talking to some group of girls. At the time I didn't know I was jealous but I confronted them, called them skanks, America and I got in an argument, then when I couldn't figure out why I was angry I freaked out and ran away. An old lady found me and was able to figure out immediately I was in love. I was in denial and confused, and it ended up taking her telling me a story about nazis to realize my own feelings."
Ukraine was puzzled at that last part but ignored it and asked about the more important part. "Why were you in the denial?"
Tilting her head slightly Natalya stared directly into Ukraine's eyes. "How would you feel if you realized you were in love with the arch enemy of the one you loved and the same person you yourself hated? It was... wrong. It felt like I was doing the one thing I should never do. I didn't want to betray big brother that way. Well, you can see how that worked out," she said while gesturing a hand toward the closet.
Ukraine followed the hand and kept her eyes on the closet for a minute, before turning back with a sympathetic look. "It is not up to our brother to be choosing who you can and can not be loving."
Natalya shook her head. "Do not worry about that, I was going after a new love and big brother wasn't going to stop me. All I care about now is that he doesn't find out."
On that note the two sisters fell silent, their minds wandering to speculation of what events would transpire if Russia found out. Would WW3 start? Would Alfred still be alive? It was pretty grim to think about in all honesty.
Ukraine couldn't keep her eyes off the closet as she thought about the shrine. If Russia were to find out about Natalya and Alfred somehow it would most likely be because of that.
"You are realizing a few doors and the locks will not be able to be stopping our brother from finding the shrine?" She pointed out.
"That's what the wall panel is for. Big brother won't notice it's there unless he knows where to look," Natalya explained. "Besides, I don't think he'd ever have any reason to crawl in the back of my closet."
"That may be true," Ukraine agreed, still with her eyes glued to the closet. That's when she suddenly had a strange request. "Could you be telling me about the things on it?"
"What why? Nyet that's mine! You've seen enough anyway," Natalya denied, backing away defensively.
"Sestra please. You are already letting me ask the questions. And da I have seen the shrine, so what is the harm of showing it to me?" Ukraine reasoned, to which Natalya eventually grumbled in defeat.
"Dammit fine. But I swear if Russia figures out because of you I will kill you," she threatened, which Ukraine took very seriously. She's been threatened with death for far less.
With both sisters standing up they walked to the closet and reentered it, Natalya instructing Ukraine to close and lock the door behind them before crawling further in.
Turning on a small light the dark closet became illuminated, showing the small area Natalya had created to sit and sleep. Ukraine must've missed that when she was staring at the shrine the first time.
"So, you are coming in here a lot?" She wondered while looking at the little makeshift bed.
Natalya glanced over with irritation then went back to removing the wall panel. "I can be here as much as I damn well please."
Ukraine nervously laughed as she rubbed her upper arm. "Right. Of course." Remaining quiet she let Natalya open the doors unbothered, though as she inspected the room she noticed a large, opened cardboard box.
"What is this?" She wondered out loud as she peeked into the box, noticing a letter which she grabbed and took out to read.
Turning her head to see what Ukraine was referring to Natalya's eyes widened, then in a flash she snatched it away and held it to her protectively while yelling, "don't touch that!"
Ukraine slowly backed away from the box with her hands up. She'll just stop poking around for now.
Moving the box to the other side of her Natalya went back to the shrine and pulled the onesie out, passing bashful glances to her sister as she stuffed that away.
"So what first?" She asked meekly, her head still turned away due to her embarrassed flush.
Ukraine observed all her options before pointing at the center. "That is the most beautiful orchid. Where had you been getting it?"
Natalya extended her hand and scooped up the flower, holding it close as she looked down and fondly brushed the soft pedals with her thumb.
"We were in Florida visiting the Everglades. After hours of walking around we had stopped to relax under this big tree, for some reason we were staring at each other when suddenly he started looking at something above my head."
She had a tiny smile on her lips while her eyes gazed longingly at the flower. "He reached up over me and began doing something with the tree, next thing I knew he was putting this flower in my hair. According to him they're very rare, and I guess it just sort of made me feel... special."
By the time she had finished speaking there was a massive red streak stretching from ear to ear. Though she was still so transfixed on the flower she hadn't noticed how much she was blushing, but Ukraine had.
Ukraine's smile got wider, who would've thought her sister would be capable of pulling faces like this?
Taking away Natalya's attention from the flower Ukraine pointed to the next picture. "And this one?"
Setting the flower down Natalya laughed quietly and rested her chin on her hands while looking at the picture of Alfred holding a thumbs up in front of a bison.
"We were in Yellowstone. I didn't know bison were there so Alfred wanted to keep it a surprise, but unfortunately we couldn't find any. After camping for the night he woke up to a valley full of them. After a rude awakening and getting dragged around we ended up riding one."
Ukraine raised her eyebrows with alarm, to which Natalya nodded in understanding. "I know, I thought we were gonna get ourselves trampled. Surprisingly, it remained calm the whole time, I even shouted at one point and it didn't care."
That was able to calm Ukraine down, where she then returned her attention to the shrine as she searched for another object to ask about. So many of them were pictures of Alfred smiling. "What is the one of him giving you the smiles while he is doing the driving?"
Natalya gave a strange short laugh, or more like a snort as she crossed her arms and gave the picture an amused glare. "He forced me into taking that one."
"Oh, and what about the one of him eating the burger?" Ukraine followed up. Another one of Natalya's favorites. She eagerly began to explain.
"On our way back to his home we had gone to Chicago because he kept saying they had some of the best burgers in the world. I just thought the face he was making was too cute not to take a picture."
"That is the most adorable, and this colorful thing?" Ukraine asked while picking up the vibrant multicolored piece of wood.
"That's a piece of petrified wood, which Alfred got for me when we went to the petrified forest," Natalya answered, her eyes going wide in realization of what she said.
Ukraine eyed her suspiciously. "So America was taking you there after I had been telling him not to?" Natalya felt like a bad child getting caught by their mother.
"Sestra it wasn't- "was he bringing you to the valley of death?!" Ukraine interrupted in a panicked voice.
"Sestra they aren't actually dangerous. Da Death Valley was really hot but it's not like I was in any real danger," Natalya reasoned.
Ukraine crossed her arms and gave a peeved "hmph!" while sticking her head high. "America has been breaking his promise. I am thinking I need to be having the word with him."
"Don't," Natalya grumbled, already feeling secondhand embarrassment from what that conversation would be like.
After grumpy Ukraine subsided she asked about more of shrine, her next interest being the small laminated hair. "Why are you having Alfred's hair? Where had you been getting it?"
Natalya felt her mouth go dry as everything went hot. She couldn't just tell her sister she's been cuddling and sleeping in Alfred's bed. "I um... well. . . It would just be easier to show you."
Grabbing the small package she fiddled with it in her hands and nervously glanced over at Ukraine. "During the time I was with America I began to get curious with that little cowlick he has, "Nantucket" as he named it. Uh. . . just look."
Holding the package up she poked and tickled the hair, making it bounce and dance in the lamination. Ukraine watched on curiously, the same as Natalya had whenever she plays with Nantucket while Alfred sleeps.
"I've been trying to figure out what touching it actually does. It's been unsuccessful so far but it's definitely intriguing."
Dropping the package in Ukraine's hand she watched as they prodded the hair, their eyes sparkling as the hair squirmed under their finger. It was strange how some cowlick had this effect on all that touched it.
Ukraine started to giggle while poking the hair more, she wasn't quite sure why it was so infinitely fun to play with.
After a while of the sisters passing it back and forth they put it back and moved on. "How about the picture of you with America and little Sealand, and who is the other one also?" Ukraine asked.
Taking the picture in her hands Natalya brushed over it delicately with her fingers, lost in pleasant memory.
"The brown-haired one is Molossia, America's micronation as I've mentioned before. He's very vulgar and aggressive, but that's just a cover, from what I've seen he's actually pretty calm. You'd be surprised how similar he is to America, he calls himself the superhero.
This picture we took after going to Alaska and hiking Denali, the tallest mountain in the United States. We made it to the peak and America pulled us together for a group picture."
A slightly bigger smile graced her lips as she looked between the four nations. "You know, many times we were mistaken for being a family. I disliked it before but now... it would be nice wouldn't it? I already had to save these three fools from sledding off a cliff."
She stared affectionately at the photo for a minute, then as she moved to set it down she noticed Ukraine rubbing her eye. Turning her head she noticed there were small tears in the corners of their eyes.
"Sestra," she called out, but Ukraine just shook her head and gave them a large smile. "It is fine. I am just still so surprised my sestra is truly in love."
Natalya muttered to herself and looked away from her sister with an angry fluster. "It's whatever."
Ukraine wiped her eyes dry and looked to the last object that caught her interest. "Why had you been stealing a piece of America's jacket?"
Glancing at the star patch Natalya frowned and held herself in discomfort. "He started to let me hold and wear his jacket, it was so warm and comforting, and again it made me feel special. He never let's anyone wear it. Well when we got into the argument I took it from him, and then I..." she trailed off, self hatred burning inside her.
"I took one of my knives and destroyed it. I was just so angry, I couldn't accept that he was rejecting me. So, I took ripped off the patch and ran. I just wanted... needed to have a piece of it with me."
Putting her head in her hands she shook her head back and forth slowly. "I don't blame him for hating my fucking guts."
Ukraine wasn't sure what to say, she could only stare between Natalya and the star patch. After a while Natalya raised her head and stared at the patch, frustrated tears being forced back from falling.
Ukraine moved closer and hugged Natalya tightly from the side, her own eyes growing watery as Natalya slumped to the side in her arms. "I am sorry sestra."
Natalya kept quiet and continued to stare at the shrine with blurry eyes. How could she mess up this bad?
Ukraine never left her side, continuing to hug her long after she had gotten a grip on her emotions. From there the two just talked, many parts weren't even about Alfred, they talked about anything that came to mind.
Once she finally had let go she helped Natalya tidy up the shrine and hide it once more, afterwords both of them exited the closet and stood awkwardly in the middle of the room.
Looking over at the clock Natalya noticed it was beginning to get late. "Maybe you should leave. I'm sure big brother needs help making dinner," she said with her back to Ukraine.
"I am sure he can be managing by himself. I can be staying if you are wanting," Ukraine stated, but Natalya refused. "I'm fine sestra."
Walking over to her bed she started fixing the blanket, meanwhile Ukraine stood behind with a small frown on her face. Natalya wasn't fine, she wasn't fine at all.
"Are you certain? It is really not the problem," Ukraine insisted. Natalya sat on the bed and stared with increasing annoyance. "Da, you can go now."
Ukraine wasn't sure she wanted to leave, but eventually with enough scary looks Natalya was able to get her moving.
Making it to the door she opened it and began to leave, but then took one last look at Natalya. "Sestra?" She called to her.
"What?" Natalya replied, her eyes still narrowed at them. Ukraine cowered behind the door but kept her head poked in.
"I would not be doing the giving up just yet. I am knowing you are very upset and are not believing me but America is reasonable, I am for certain that if you can be apologizing and proving yourself to him he will be taking you back in the heartbeat, especially if he is in the love as well. Returning his jacket patch may be the good start."
Natalya scowled at her feet and mumbled to herself, "it seems like everyone is saying that."
"Huh?" Ukraine wondered, moving her head in further to listen better. "It was nothing," Natalya deflected. "I'll think on it. Now leave."
With a worried look Ukraine nodded and closed the door, locking it behind her and slowly walking away.
Flopping onto her back Natalya stared up at the ceiling and let out a huff. Would Alfred really take her back, after all she's done? Surely not, he was already cautious after Amelia died, now because of her he won't trust a soul ever again.
But if she could show him she never told anyone about his secrets, and make up for what she did, would he be able to trust her the same?
Everyone says he doesn't hold a grudge, but he definitely holds onto heartbreak, and from what she remembers reading about for the Spanish American War, he won't personally have a grudge but he will feel good when getting back at someone that wronged him.
Raising her hands up she pulled down her eyelids from a mix of exhaustion and frustration. What the hell is she supposed to do? Even if there is a chance he still loves her there's no way she'll be able to pull off getting him back, last time all she had to do was confess and kiss him and she completely botched it.
Dropping her arms she stared off blankly and sighed. She wondered how Alfred was doing right now. His mother said he was sad and afraid. She doesn't want him to be sad, not because of her.
She wants to see his bright eyes and smile, and hear his cheerful laughter, and feel his arms and warm hands on her shoulders. . . She just wants to see Alfred again, if not just one last time.