Sorry for taking too long. It seems to be that every time in my Simply Stupid stories I reach a chapter 8 or a 9, I get writer's block that could last months until I get more inspiration and get back in the game.
I don't own Pokémon or any other series mentioned. Read, Review, and Enjoy!
Right after the previous chapter...
"(KYOGRE, YOU WHALE)! (You are swimming too fast)!" Groudon shouted as Kyogre tried to swim as fast and graceful as she could.
The legendary Pokémon was on a massive rock shaped like a pool lounge, bobbing up and down. From what he's seeing right now, they are heading in the wrong direction. They missed the route to Cerulean City a long time ago.
"(F4(k you)! (Lord Arceus called almost every legendary in the regions, and I could only find you)!"
"(Then why the f4(k are we here)?!"
"(We need to see the chosen one)!"
"(He's in Pewter City)!"
"(Can I swim to there)?"
"(No you dumb fish)! (Pewter City's on LAND)! (Arceus, even the Tapus have an idea where the Chosen One is, and they have Fini under surveillance after they found out that demonic fish is moister than a Cloyster for him)!"
Somewhere in Alola...
"FIIIIINIIII~!"
"Le! Lele le lele!"
"KO! KO KO KO KO KO KO!"
"Bulu bu!"
Back to Groudon and Kyogre)
Widening her eyes in shock, Kyogre did the same thing Pikachu did before Groudon berated her.
"(F444444444((((((KKKKKK)!" taking a right turn, they made their way to Pallet Town, unknowingly pushing away a pokéball into the currents.
The currents to a familiar region...
Inside Pikachu's Pokéball...
He hates being in a Pokéball for a few reasons.
It disables his abilities.
"...chu!"
The scenery changes depending on the emotional and physical situation.
"...Pikachu!"
He can't talk to anyone.
"Pikachu!"
It can't connect to other Pokéballs.
"Pikachu!"
His eyes are closed right now since he should be expecting plain darkness. The noises are getting to his nerves.
Pikachu looked around after hearing that. "WHAT?!" the rat called out. He was surprised when he saw who were there:
Half of everybody in the traveling party.
Bayleef, Oshawott, and Pignite.
"How does it feel to be back in a Pokéball?" Oshawott asked.
Looking at everyone and the area surrounding them, he scrunched up his face in discomfort. It looks like a crackhouse. "A decade out and I already hate it again. Also," Pikachu looked at them in confusion. "How are you guys in here? And where's Squirtle and Snivy?"
"We found out that our Pokéballs have digital terminals and can use them to go to other balls trapped in here." the water-otter bashfully boasted.
"Snivy's in her Pokéball. Same with Squirtle." Pignite added, waving his left hand-like hoof in the air as a bright red ring engulfed all of them and brought them somewhere...
In Squirtle's Pokéball...
"Hey, Pokéball!" Squirtle called out as he laid on a bed with a martini glass, wrapped in a thick blanket. "Show me some Gardevoir porn!"
A hologram came out, with a voice blaring.
"SHOWING GARCHOMP PORN." The hologram morphed into a female Garchomp with human characteristics and a bikini slowly spreading her thicc cheeks-
"No! I said Gardevoir! Not Garchomp!" Squirtle shouted, covering his eyes from the cursed monstrosity.
Pignite appeared behind the curtain with Bayleef, Oshawott, and Pikachu, wondering where Squirtle is. They heard what the turtle just said with wide eyes.
"SHOWING GARBODOR PORN."
"NO! I SAID GARDEVOIR! NOT GARBODOR-"
"NOW PLAYING GARBODOR STRIP TEASE."
Pignite made a loud "What the hell you say?!" as he burst from the curtains in shock. *DING!*
Oshawott nearly had a heart attack!
[It was super effective!]
"AHHHH! HOW THE F4(K ARE YOU GUYS IN HERE?!" Squirtle shouted, scared out of wit's end. Pokéballs were supposed to isolate Pokémon! How could this happen?!
When the Garbodor hologram went into the more... vile, but juicy segment, Squirtle was screaming for the hologram to end. "STOP! STOP! STO-"
"Garrr~"
"This so wrong on so many levels... Why are you watching porn?!" Pignite shouted.
"I barely have anything to do nowadays! The title defense fights are nice, I gotta admit, but I just want some alone time! ME WANT PORN! ME WANT TO FAPSTRUBATE! Go harass Snivy or something until we go to shore!"
Pikachu, Bayleef, Oshawott, and Pignite looked at each other before being engulfed by the red light, being transported to Snivy's Pokéball.
"AND STAY OUT!" Squirtle waited for pure silence before shouting. "...POKÉBALL! SHOW ME SOME THICK BLASTOISE BABES!"
Inside Snivy's Pokéball...
Snivy laid on her hospital cot, watching some anime. She was at the part where the dense MC was checking the engine of a car. The girl who constantly flirts with the guy stood above him with dirty giggles, wearing what could only be described as a school uniform.
The moment Pikachu, Bayleef, Oshawott, and Pignite came in, the grass-snake waved at them blissfully. Some time ago, most likely before Ash became the Unova champ and the amnesia, Snivy pirated her favorite cartoons. Also, she has a scrapbook somewhere that has most of her photos wiped out from existence until she could find out how to get her memories back.
Pikachu sat next to her in a disconcerted manner, observing her position and what it means: It's awkward and terrifying. She looks like an omnivorous lil' Python-Garter-Viper-thing with limbs and a leaf stuck to her tail, resting on her back instead of her abdomen. With the bulge in her stomach being a bomb set to blow if they reach civilization, it was as though a surgical procedure is about to happen. Like a big orange tumor or swallowing an angry tiny Voltorb, which is absolutely disturbing to think about. The bomb didn't shrink when she got into her Pokéball.
"Hey, Watts."
"Hey..." the rat whispered. "What are you watching?"
Snivy shrugged. "Anime."
"Well... Mind if I join?" no answer came, but it was obvious from Snivy's happy expression that she'd love to watch it with him.
While the two watched, enjoying each other's company, Bayleef slowly raised her head to Snivy's level and gave a masturbatory face at the two.
She began whispering out loud to spook them.
"Hi, Thunder Rat! Hello Enema Snake! Watcha watching, hm?"
Snivy turned her head towards the sauropod and made a light threat.
"Don't call me Enema Snake... You're lucky Pikachu is here and that I'm held down by a bomb. If he wasn't, I would've strangled you and use your head leaf as my personal fan."
That made the dino-bean-leaf-thing look at Pikachu to see what his response would be.
All he did was scoot a little closer to Snivy and ignore Bayleef. The audacity of these two!
"Tsu?"
"Hm?"
"Can you open your mouth? *Snivy opens her mouth...* Thanks. I gotta see if I can get the bomb out." Observing with a push to the gut, Pikachu couldn't help but notice that he couldn't push the bomb up Snivy's throat.
"...æugh..." Snivy groaned, feeling her mouth get sore from keeping it open. "...agh ugh agh augh æughs..."
"I know... I'll let go once I can see how I can get rid of- *THUD!* ... it." Pikachu released his hold and looked around. I think Squirtle's Pokéball hit something. "... We should get out and check what's going on."
Outside the Pokéball, ?...
"... *CRASH! FSSHH... CRASH!* ..."
Squirtle sat on the sand looking mighty unimpressed. There are too many rocks, trash, and shells on this beach.
Peeling a nanab berry, he watched the waves crash into the shore. What a beautiful sight. Even more, so that he just had post-nut clarity for yeeting his turtle meat to the beat of random Pokémon.
Hearing his Pokéball open up and release everyone else, he continued eating in silence.
Pikachu made a visible shudder as he looked around. It was a little more tolerable than last time before he met Ash.
Bayleef rested on the sand, legs splayed out lazily.
Oshawott and Pignite were cracking their backs on some rocks.
Squirtle continued eating as he wrote 'Here, I sit and hesitate. Shall I s#!t or masturbate.' on the sand with a stick.
They all did this for a few minutes until Snivy heard a click and began panicking.
"NIIIIII! VI SNY NI VI NI VY!"
The bomb was arming itself. Set to make them meet Arceus prematurely...
With Celebi over at Dimension SS1.C...
"C'MON KYLE! C'MON, MAN! ELLIOTT FAILED ME AND HARVICK'S BEHIND YOU! CONQUER BRISTOL! SWING LIKE THE CENTRIPETAL FORCE OF MY BALLS!"
"DON'T LISTEN TO MAH BROTHA! HARVICK! GIT YER BUM OUT OF SECOND AND CATCH UP!"
"ROWDY!"
"HAPPY!"
The two screamers who were sounding like creamers are Tornado Man and Fire Man. All they were doing was watching a race live. While that was going on, Rock was muttering to himself.
"... I kinda hope someone else wins this time."
Celebi sat next to him on a foam paperweight shaped like a donut. The language barrier between the two was excruciatingly awkward.
"Bi..."
Looking at what looked in his eyes to be an onion fairy with wings, the Super-Fighting Robot shrugged a little before continuing his conversation with Bomb Man.
"Bomb?"
"Yeah?"
"Remember when we had to save Dad, Guts, Ice, and Shiro from Wily?" Celebi perked up on that and listened intently.
"Yeah... And then the whole 'Oh no! Wily brought different Shiro counterparts and tried to have them kill each other' only for them to team up with us in taking down whatever tried sucking us through to the next dimension? Yee."
"Ce le bi bi be (What is this about)?" Celebi asked.
Bomb Man looked at Rock with a bit of an idea of what Celebi said. "... I think the onion asked what we were talking about."
"Bi!"
"Oh. Okay uh..."
"Celebi."
Seeing Celebi say her name Rock continued. "Celebi? There's this old guy who has a grudge on our dad. We got into a fight with his robots, a bunch of techno-organic aliens crash-lands in the middle of the fight, then the leader of them got kidnapped along with some of our family. Add in some other heroes, the alien leader's former enemies, folk from some other dimensions, and a Malaysian guy, that was how we saved them. Got it?"
"Bi! Le lebe be cele bili? (What about the life-force sucking)?"
The two looked at each other, having a gut feeling that Celebi wanted to know more.
'Dang... The onion wants more./Oh boy... This will be a long talk."
Before they could continue, Fire Man gave a loud roar.
"HOT DIGGITY DOG! HAPPY HAS WON!"
Watts Chapter 5 end...
References:
1. The Tapus from Sun and Moon
2. "Moister than an oyster..."
3. How it feels to be in a Pokéball
4. The forbidden rule 34 stuff, with an emphasis on the issues of talking to an AI
5. "What the hell you say?!" -Steven He
6. The moaning pufferfish meme
7. Post-nut clarity
8.a The September 16, 2020, NASCAR Cup Series race. Reason? In Mega Man: DeafMatch Seasons 1 and 2 (SS#1 and SS#8), Tornado Man (Toto, to his close friends and family) is revealed to be an avid NASCAR fanboy. Also, I tried keeping into the context the next reference mentioned below.
8.b In MM:DM S1 and 2's Quarantine series, which our dear Celebi has entered to find out more about what forced Ash into his coma, one of Mega Man's siblings had a call with a Japanese-American race car driver (Kyle Miyata "Yung Money" Larson), who got suspended for saying the N-word in an official BROADCASTED Livestream. No, the word wasn't "NIGERUNDAYO.", it was "NIGERUNDAYO." excuse the censoring.
Basically, said sibling and the driver were talking about an apologetic essay to the public. Said essay in real life Larson completed and posted on October 1st, 2020. He was back in NASCAR from his suspension and won FIVE (technically four since the NASCAR All-Star Race in an exhibition race) times this year of 2021 in one of the most decorated teams in NASCAR history, Hendrick Motorsports. four of those five wins were won back-to-back, which is a rare feat in the sport only done by six other drivers in the sport's 72 year history. Now... If only his F4(KING TIRES didn't go Lightning Mcqueen at Pocono...
Also, I made a whole music mashup joke on YouTube because Daytona USA is a Japanese stock-car video game, Speed Racer is a racing anime, and Larson is a Japanese-American stock-car racer. Look up my YouTube channel Cian- Neural. I make stuff sporadically.
Edit: HAHA!!! YES! INTRODUCING 2021'S NASCAR CUP SERIES CHAMP: KYLE LARSON OF HENDRICK MOTORSPORTS!!! He dominated this season with 10 wins and leading the Championship playoffs! Five more wins than the 2nd highest, Alex "Hack/The Showman" Bowman!
During October of 2020, Larson was reinstated into NASCAR and was considered an untouchable to teams and sponsors in the Cup Series. The only guy willing to hire him was Rick Hendrick, a successful team owner. Larson drove the #5 with a paint scheme once used by Hendrick's son, Ricky, who died 15 years ago in a plane accident. Dominating the competition, Larson helped Hendrick Motorsports achieve the most wins in NASCAR Cup Series history at 280 wins alongside Bowman, Chase Elliott, and William Byron.
Dang that nearly turned into one of my single-page essays right there. Anyways...
9. "...powered by the centripetal force of my balls..." -Some commercial dub I forgot about but remembered through memory
10. Mega Man: DeafMatch Season 1 and half of Season 2 in a nutshell
11. "Here, I sit and hesitate. Shall I shit or masturbate?" -A meme I found in the depths of a hellhole known as iFunny
12. Meeting Arceus early? Nah! That would have meant that their quest is complete. Nothing is easy, even in real life.
13. "We are going to the Crackhouse." -The Urban Rescue Ranch
14. Joking about animes full of fan service... Nothing wrong about though.
15. Imagine if Groudon was on a pool lounge... That'd be entertaining to watch... Or horrifying if a tsunami is triggered.
That's all for now, folks.