Anne's Diary: A Companion Story to 'By a Simple Twist of Fate'

by DW.618

Kslchen's "By a Simple Twist of Fate" immerses us into the modern-day version of Rilla Blythe as she grows in maturity and in her relationship with Ken. But have you ever wondered what her mother, Anne Blythe, must be thinking through all of this? With kslchen's blessing, I am attempting to explore Anne's thoughts on Rilla's life via excerpts from Anne's personal diary.

26. The week before 'Twist' chapter 38

May 2012 (Anne wrote this diary entry during the week just prior to the events in chapter 38 in "By a Simple Twist of Fate")

Dear Diary,

It's the middle of the afternoon and I don't normally write in your pages at this point of the day. But I need to vent…

I just got off the phone (again!) with Marilla. As much as I love her, my dear mother-in-law is driving me nuts! My stress levels are already high. I just finished administering my final exams last week, I have a deadline to meet for my editor in two days, Gilbert is still at the cardiology convention in Montreal until Friday…and then we leave on Tuesday to start our summer of graduations by flying to NYC for Rilla's graduation (and to visit with Joy's family, of course). I'm exhausted just writing this! Anyway, seeing Rilla in NYC is the reason why Marilla has been calling so often.

Let me back up and say for the record that Marilla has rarely ever expressed an unsolicited opinion about me as a wife or as a mother in all of these years! And, when compared with the many opinions I've heard from my own mother, I feel even more grateful for Marilla's restraint. But…because Marilla is aware that Gilbert and I will be finally meeting Ken in person, she has sooo many tidbits of royal etiquette to share with me! How to properly say his title, how to curtsy, what to do, what not to do. Uggh! I know she means well and she's just trying to be helpful, but seriously…I might start letting her calls go to voicemail!

So, thank you, dearest diary, once again for letting me vent my emotions here. Maybe now that I've let out this steam, I can get back to work trying to please my editor…

.

.

I didn't anticipate writing more in your pages tonight, but I just got off the phone with Rilla and want to take a few minutes to work out my thoughts by writing them down. She was talking more about Mrs. Weisz and I've been trying to put my finger on what really hurts and worries Rilla the most about Mrs. Weisz' death. With all of the grandparents that Rilla has ever known being still alive and well, Rilla has never experienced the death of someone close to her until now. So, I wondered if that was the essence of Rilla's sadness. But after tonight's call, I don't think it is just that.

What seems to be most upsetting to Rilla is not just that Mrs. Weisz is gone, but that the family members that Mrs. Weisz always talked about were inventions of her imagination! She worries that Mrs. Weisz was so lonely that she was losing her mind or something. And then that makes Rilla worry that she should have done more to keep Mrs. Weisz from such loneliness.

I've been thinking about this…pondering over it the past few days…and I think I've settled on my viewpoint. I hope that in time, Rilla may come to see that Mrs. Weisz' imaginary "family members" were just as real to her as the characters I create for my stories. That alternate universe of her creation brought her joy and filled a void that could have easily destroyed her. The invented "family" gave her a sense of attachment and identity to some degree. By reinventing her life this way, Mrs. Weisz was able to choose to "think only of the past as its remembrance gives you pleasure," (as Elizabeth Bennet so famously says in Pride & Prejudice).

And, as far as Rilla worrying that she didn't do enough to remove Mrs. Weisz' loneliness, that will have to be something Rilla will just have to analyze and accept on her own. She has mentioned that Ken consistently reassures her that Mrs. Weisz loved Rilla like a granddaughter and that her frequent visits, the books she brought for her, her true friendship, and even George's presence all filled Mrs. Weisz' life greatly with love and joy! Personally, I think they both helped each other a lot!

I know that cleaning out Mrs. Weisz' apartment is overwhelming for Rilla right now – especially as she is trying to study for next week's finals. I offered to help her do the boxing up, but she said Ken will be arriving tomorrow to help her since the landlord wants Mrs. Weisz' place emptied out by the end of the week. I'm sure the landlord will freshen it up and get someone else in there soon, but I'm hoping (probably foolishly) that he won't do that until after Rilla moves out from her "Shoebox" in mid-July. Seeing another family in Mrs. Weisz' flat might be hard for Rilla, I'd think.

Though I wasn't often with Mrs. Weisz (just twice, if I remember right), I heard about her from Rilla so often. It will be odd for me to go past her empty flat next week (let alone to consider other tenants occupying it). I was looking forward to visiting with Mrs. Weisz during this trip and enjoying a cup of her excellent coffee. I think I will suggest to Rilla that she and I locate a European coffee shop next week and enjoy a cup of coffee and a pastry in Mrs. Weisz' honor!