The Last Trial

He couldn't recall the last time he prayed. For a better game turnout, a better father, a better life. He was never required to do so in his childhood. And yet, walking through the damp, dark caverns where he could practically feel his end approaching, he was murmuring. A silent plea for help to the divine. The fayth in their infinite wisdom and experience, he hoped, watched over him. May they guide his every step, he asked. May they aid him in finding his way to Yuna. They had every reason to help him, didn't they? The fayth wanted all of this to be over soon as much as the rest of them. They agreed to help him win the fight against Sin. And Yevon. But he wasn't confident in that fact. After all, they allowed this to happen in the first place. Why would they account for their actions? It was them who asked for his help, because even their abilities had limits. And while Tidus felt his legs shake under the weight and pressure of the situation, his heart sank upon this realization. Why Auron decided now, of all times, to place him in the lead was beyond him.

He jumped when he heard the high-pitched screaming behind him. Rikku fell to her knees and dug her nails into her thighs. Tears ran down her face at such a fast rate that they couldn't have been voluntary.

"Rikku, what is it?" Lulu asked, placing her hands on the younger's shoulders.

She couldn't answer. She repeated the name multiple times. "Keyakku..."

Her body was frozen in place as Lulu tried shaking her. Her head was clouded with a misty white cloud. Her eyes were fixed on the ground.

"What's wrong with her?" Tidus asked, though he was certain he had an idea.

After an attempt at curing her with several potions, the rest decided to search the area for the source. It was either too dark or the cause wasn't visible to the mortal eyes. Then Auron raised his sword. Tidus turned to him and panicked seeing the older man run towards him at full speed. He jumped out of the way as Auron swung at the space behind him. A low roar echoed in the halls and Rikku's head was cleared. Lulu caught her as she fell over and gave her another potion. Rikku blinked her eyes several times as her vision adjusted.

"What... what happened?" she breathed sleepily.

No one answered at first, as none of them had a clear idea. Auron sheathed his sword and Tidus appeared in front of him before he could walk any further.

"How did you know?" the young man asked.

"Things become visible if you look hard enough."

As unhelpful and puzzling as the advice was, Tidus felt his head nod on its own.

Rikku wasn't the only one affected. It seemed as though the cadavers was forcing everyone through moments laid to rest. Tidus' red-haired friend was cemented to the ground, his eyes wide and glowing. He was experiencing a physical and mental freeze.

A period in time when he felt as though he'd failed the most important person in his life. Someone he'd been entrusted with since the boy's upbringing. Wakka could hear himself saying goodbye to him. The younger, shorter, more rebellious version of himself. There was no quarrel. There was no protest. Wakka was sure he would return, and when young Chappu didn't, he blamed himself.

Lulu's lowest point in her first guardianship. Rewatching her beloved summoner transform into the soulless creature that clouded their adventures. She had never forgiven herself for the tragedy.

Auron must have developed a sixth sense for sources of evil. Tidus could turn his head in all directions and all he saw was the old man whipping past him and drawing his sword through air. When the third ordeal passed, Tidus slammed his fists at the side of his legs.

"How in the hell are you doing that?" He said. "Tell me your secrets, old man!"

"I don't see how it would help you find it out for yourself." Auron replied.

Tidus clenched his teeth and threw his arms in the air. "This is the worst time for your stupid riddley-... riddles! If you know how to stop it, spit it out, dammit!"

Auron turned his head to the boy. "Believe that you can."

Realizing Auron was only going to be himself, Tidus growled and continued forward.

"Whatever. Let's go."

But he didn't hear the sound of the others following.

"Uh, guys?" He said. "I said let's go."

Rikku wrapped herself in her arms tightly. "I... I don't think I wanna go forward..." she said in a weak voice.

"What?!" Tidus snapped and stomped towards her. "What do you mean you don't wanna go forward?! Are you saying you don't wanna save Yuna?!"

"Calm down," Lulu told him.

"Don't tell me to be calm!" He snarled. "The world is about to end and humanity's about to fall and she's afraid of a ghost?!"

No one defended him nor her. Everyone was silent and still, infuriating the blonde.

"What's wrong with you guys?!" He yelled. "Have you forgot what we had to battle a few years ago?! That was the scariest thing to ever happen to us! We've seen and been through worse than this!"

He could feel his body trembling as he spoke. And when the others neglected to address him once again, he turned around and moved forward.

"Fine, stay here," he growled. "I'm gonna save her myself..."

A gloved, firm grip rested on his shoulder. He didn't need to look to see who was capturing his attention. Auron the wise, stopping his impulses yet again.

"You're foolish to go alone," he said in a low, controlled voice. "You know that."

Tidus sighed and lowered his head. Without anything more to say, the rest of them shook the feeling of dread from themselves and preceded the path.

A surprise had been waiting for them in the corridors leading to different paths. Three surprises. The Magus Sisters in their horrifying, united glory standing beside each other, blocking the way. Fighting them without the extra strength was a nightmare in itself. Now their healing abilities molded into reverse healing. Extracting health from the others, they powered themselves for their Delta Attack. Suddenly, Tidus regained flashbacks from Braska's Final Aeon. How did they defeat something so monstrous? With magic and power. But not only the kind of power that comes from magic. Willpower.

Tidus had stood his ground and held his anti-possession shield in defense. He wasn't the same person he was then. He'd become stronger. And with his spontaneous boost of confidence, he endured the hit, leaving him on his last bit of health. But he was fortunate that he was ready for an Overdrive.

When he had given the last of his health materials to the rest of his team, the three girls had finally fallen.

"Which way do we go?" Asked Wakka.

The three corridors were as dark as the rest of the environment, echoing with the same melancholy groaning of the inhabitants. Tidus looked at Auron for an answer, but his silence showed that the older man was as puzzled as everyone else.

At the corner of his eye, Tidus spotted an unusual glow. It faded as quickly as it arrived. It had come from the far left corridor. And his legs involuntarily began walking towards it.

"Wait!" Risky called after him. "Are you sure that's the right way?"

"Yeah..." he mumbled. "Yeah... I'm sure."

Though he wasn't, he was never one to question the notorious gut feeling. It was usually right.

As it had turned out, the three divided paths had been connected the entire time. When they had reached the end of the tunnel, they approached a large, empty space. The same outcome was true for the other two corridors.

"Huh..." Tidus muttered to himself.

"Look!"

Rikku snapped Tidus's attention towards the pulsing light before him. He didn't need to see clearly to know what he was looking at. Who he was looking at, rather. His eyes immediately watered.

Her body was cold, her eyes whitened over and lifeless, and her arms and legs were suspended against the walls made out of ancient corpses. A cloud of mixed feelings washed over him, though he couldn't put a name to them. He was glad to see her, he knew he was, but it was the sort of uncertainty he felt when he'd landed on Spira after floating through the dark abyss of nothing. This wasn't her. Not really. Something had taken her and transformed her. She wasn't the woman he had fallen in love with. He was more than aware of that fact, but he couldn't find himself doing anything but standing a few feet away from her, hopelessness clear across his face.

"How do we get her out of here?" Rikku cried, desperately trying to rip the vines away. Tidus had taken his sword, without a word, and slashed at one of it. The vine had reconstructed itself before the blade could completely slide through it. Wakka and Gaia had tried tearing the thick vines apart, but they were resilient. The grip on poor Yuna was so strong, her body seemed to have been losing color from the loss of circulation through her limbs. How could she have any circulation through her body, anyways? Tidus didn't want to know the answer to that.

"It's no use!" the Al Bhed cried. In desperation, she grabbed the handy grenades kept safely in her satchel. "Everyone, stand back! I'm blasting her out of here!"

Auron laid a gentle hand on her shoulder.

"Reconsider," he told her. "Clearly, we won't be getting her out that way. Not directly, anyways."

She turned to him, her expression grim and her swirly eyes on the ground. "What can we do, then?"

Auron had to think for a second and his head was tilted back as he pondered. He walked over to the blonde blitzer. The one he'd spent a large portion of the boy's life with.

"We'll stay here with her," he told the boy. "You go find the source."

"Me? Why me?" he asked, in an absent-minded sense. Of course it had to be him. It always had to be him. From the very beginning, he had been chosen to put an end to the cycle. It was his time. It would always be his time. He didn't need Auron to answer his question, he only nodded his head. "Okay. You guys stay here and guard her. I'm gonna fix this."

Before anyone could protest, and the rest of them sounded like that was exactly what they were about to do, Auron held his arm up and stopped them. "We'll be waiting for you."

If the fear wasn't already clear in his mind, it was now as he began to stray from the rest of the group. There was no safety in numbers in this place. Not that any other place on this world had been particularly safe. He didn't allow his fear and his own lack of confidence to prevent him from taking down Sin. More specifically, to take down his father. He'd been waiting to tell his father what he'd really thought of him, to beat him at something, for as long as he could remember. Even so, it wasn't as simple as beating him at a game of blitzball. And what he was about to do now, to save the woman that gave him more purpose in life than his father ever had, was far from a sleazy sports game.

He didn't even travel that far away from the rest until he heard it. A voice that could still make his heart stop even at a time like this.

"You won't disappear, will you?"

Tidus squeezed his eyes shut. He heard it, he was definitely sure his mind wasn't playing tricks on him, but he didn't dare look.

Looking would only make it real.

His grip was tight against the handle on his sword. The sword of a dead man, it was, and with its help the cavern was much less dark. Like the blade was responding to him reiterating his statement about how he couldn't see a damn thing. It wasn't any ordinary sword, he told himself, and he was no ordinary man. Ordinary men didn't receive second chances at life.

He'd lived an entire life, though some may have said he experienced a short one. The first step he'd ever taken on Spira, he was a boy. Inexperienced, naive, and hopeful. He couldn't accept that "this was the way things have always been", or "this is the only way". There was no one solution to everything. And against all odds, he'd proven that not only to himself, but to the entire world. There was a one percent chance they would win in the battle against Sin. Against Yevon and all ungodly things it has created. And he did it. They did it together. And they would do it again. Until he was only a memory.

His palms began to sweat as he realized he'd been wandering through this humid cavern for what felt like centuries and he hadn't seen a single nightmare. He hated anticipating what was to come. What kinds of unspeakable horrors are waiting for him in the dark? What loose ends were expecting to be mended or severed altogether? He thought of Jecht. Since he'd been able to recognize fear as it was, he'd been afraid of Jecht. Over time, that fear turned to hatred, but he never had the confidence to tell his father what he'd thought of him. Not until it was time that Jecht leave this world. Or perhaps Sin would grace him with its presence again. Those who didn't fear Sin in Spira didn't originate from it. Each generation was born with new fears and tales of a monstrous creature with undead armor. Once Tidus had seen what it was capable of, the way it swallowed his entire home right before his eyes, he knew he didn't want to come across it again.

He would see his mother for what she would've become had he brought her back to this world. Half human. Half fiend. But she had already passed to the Farplane, he reminded himself. At least, he hoped that was the case.

Tidus had wandered into another universe. One that was brighter and strange. But it was familiar. The sights and the sounds all registered in his head as ones he'd seen before. The sunset and the birds flying across the oceanic horizon.

Besaid?

His legs were halfway in the water. Something was off about this place. It wasn't the Besaid he knew. It wasn't the one he'd been living on for over a year now. It was one he visited in a dream. With Yuna.

He spun around after the feeling of being watch had overcome him. What he saw wasn't a ghost, or a monster, or a hybrid fiend.

He saw himself. A complete duplicate, so accurately representing himself that he froze. His grip relaxed around the handle and he gathered himself.

"Okay," he said. "I can handle that. No big deal."

His double said nothing. Only stared at him with blank eyes.

"So..." he said. "Are we gonna... are we gonna battle? Or what?"

It didn't answer him. A shiver ran up Tidus's spine as he felt unsettled.

"I'm just gonna... I'm just gonna go..." he turned and started towards the other side of the island.

"What did she tell you?" his double said, and the way his tone perfectly mimicked Tidus's spooked him. His jaw moved without any words emitting. He turned halfway around and kept his eyes on the floor.

"W-who?"

The double took a few steps forward and Tidus reached for his sword again.

"The fayth," the double stopped in its tracks. "What did she tell you?"

He had heard so many things from the fayth that he didn't know where to begin. She told him the story of how it all came to be what it is now. About how one man's anger and grief had turned the world into a living hell. How he'd allowed his resentment towards the living punished both the dead and their loved ones. She mentioned something about a heart.

"There was a heart..." Tidus said. "A heart of... something. Memories, I think."

The double nodded. "And you believed her."

Tidus turned his head. "'Course I do. The fayth don't lie. I don't think it's in their nature to..."

"Do you know how long they've kept it from you?" the double said as he walked closer. "What you really are, that is."

He really didn't. "I... I guess it's because they wanted me to stay."

"And why do you think that is?"

Tidus scratched the back of his head and his temple began to ache as he searched for an answer. "What does that have to do with anything?" He crossed his arms. "I'm here now, aren't I? I don't need to question it." He started back towards the other side of the island. "I don't have time for this..."

"They needed you here," the double said. "Because you were the only one that could fix it." It spoke in a firm tone. "She told you to strike the heart, didn't she? But she was leaving out an important piece of this puzzle."

Though he told himself he should've kept going, he wanted to pretend he didn't care about what this illusion had to say. But go where? He had no idea where he was supposed to go.

"You're still here," the double said. "And thus, evil persists."

Tidus faced the thing, but decided it was irrelevant. "I need to go now."

"Sin can't exist without you, you know," it told him. "And you can't exist without it."

He couldn't wait any longer. There was no escaping this place, either. For all he knew, he could walk off the edge of this island any second if he kept going forward.

"Do you remember this place?" the double asked him as it turned to gaze up at the cloudless sky. "You and Yuna walked these shores before. Before it happened."

Tidus looked at the ground, where the tiny grains in the sand reflected the sun. Then it hit him. It hit him with enough force that he was knocked back onto the sand. Running away with Yuna from the mad crows of anxious former believers and taking the ship out to sea. The intimacy they shared. They'd traveled along this path before, and he could still see the prints in the sand they'd made. He was trying his best to convince her that it wasn't her fault. That the fall of Yevon and the loss of faith wasn't a bad thing, and now they could see the religion for what it was: a sham. It was false hope. She refused to kiss him after ignoring him moments after he'd returned. She must have known about him. And then...

He could feel it returning. The ringing in his ears from the explosion. His heart was beating fast until he felt as though it were about to burst. The realization that he'd been dead before had caused his nerves to rise again. He was dead and he'd come back. He hadn't remembered a thing before. All he could see was Yuna falling over from shock. She was the last thing he saw. And the first thing that he'd seen again when he'd woken up. Could he have become the things he'd fought? The things he'd killed along this journey? If he'd stayed on this world longer, would he have allowed the transition to happen?

"I know what you really feel," the double said. "Tidus."

Hearing himself say his name felt like torment in itself.

"You knew this would happen," it continued. "And yet you refused to acknowledge it. You rejected the truth, pretended it wasn't there, and now you've forced everyone else to suffer the consequences."

"I didn't..." he breathed. "I didn't ask to be here..."

"You knew there was something wrong with your time here." it told him. "It bothered you and tugged at your mind. But nothing was done about it, and it escalated until the world began to fall under its claws." It was standing on the edge of the sand, looking across the sea to the sunset. "Was all of it even worth it? She didn't embrace you the way she had when you showed up again. She pushed you aside like the past six months you spent keeping her alive never existed. She treated you like you were completely irrelevant." Its hands were clasped behind its back. "Tell me, Tidus, don't you wish your story would've ended? The way it was always meant to?"

"Screw... you..." Tidus hoisted himself up on shaky hands. "Yuna had her reasons for keeping me in the dark. She didn't want me to find out about me. She was trying to protect me."

"No," the double said. "She was trying to protect herself."

Tidus was ready to attack at full speed. But he was growing weaker physically and he was losing his integrity. He was succumbing to the words spoken by a version that spoke an underlying truth to him. He could feel his heart dropping in a way he hadn't felt since she had cast him aside.

"You saw what she could do," it continued. "You're standing in her own creation. She wanted to hide this part of her from you because she was trying to protect her reputation."

"She was trying to keep me safe!" Tidus swung his sword but he was further away from the double than he thought.

It walked over to him. "Safe from what? Eventually, you were able to find it out yourself. You felt it in the darkest part in your mind, where all your memories of Jecht and your mother lay."

He sat himself up on his knees. "Shut up... just shut up. Why even bring all this shit up? I can't do a damn thing about it, now, okay?" Though his legs were practically gelatin now, he stood himself up. "I don't need to waste any more of my time here, can you just tell me where the exit is?" God, do I really sound that annoying when I get all philosophical?

"It won't help," it told him. "There is no heart here. The monster doesn't thrive on such a thing."

Tidus spun around. "Of course there is. Why would the fayth lie to me?" He chose to move forward. "I'm leaving..." But a part of him wanted to stop searching. Because he'd already done what he could do, and everything around him was showing him that it didn't work. After everything, Sin was still here. This creature was the new terror that everyone would fear for another one thousand years.

"Without hope, they would drown in their sorrow."

He closed his eyes. "That wasn't the fayth. Yunalesca was misleading people with that bullshit."

"If you want to save Yuna, you have to strike at the source. The true source. The one whose presence can only mean pain and destruction."

"What are you-?" his foot bumped against something solid. It was round. Blitzball-shaped. If he kicked it, he would die. He knew because he'd already done it before.

"No..." he took a few steps back. "No... no... this isn't how it's supposed to end. It can't be." He ran his hands through his hair, dampened with sweat. "There's gotta be more to my existence than just..."

"You may think there are forces bigger than you that's keeping you from passing on to where all memories go," it told him. "That you're invincible and the fayth have been looking after you the entire time you've been here, but they're not. Stop looking at yourself as the untouchable hero of this story. This isn't about you, anymore. You've lived your life, now let Yuna live hers."

"But..." He stared at the blitzball bomb. "I gotta save her... I'm no use to her if I'm gone..."

The double sighed. "You still don't get it. This isn't your world, Tidus. Your presence brings an imbalance to nature. You're an outlier, an outsider, and you've already done what it is that you were destined to do."

"What? To lose my family again?"

"Still thinking of yourself at a time like this..." it shook its head. "You and Jecht really are alike."

Tidus jerked his head up. "I'm not-..." he took a deep breath before the ageless resentment revisited him. "I'm not like my father. I never was."

"You are just as much of an abomination and a tool of destruction as he was." the double said. "You said time and time again that you cared for her. You promised her you wouldn't let her die, remember? You are not living by your promise by living." It looked at him with horrific intensity. "It has to end. Permanently."

He tilted his head to look at the blitzball bomb and though it may have not been the right time for it, thought of all the regrets he had in his lifetime. He didn't have many. Auron would have told him that regrets were a waste of time, anyways. The thing he regretted was not being able to fulfill the real promise he'd made to Yuna. That he would always be by her side.

He briefly gazed at the sunset. It would have been the last thing he saw before he died last time and he assumed this time wouldn't have been any different.

Sunset...

The rest of the crew all had lives of their own. They'd given him a home and a decent life on a simple island, where he could find peace in the madness that was his life. And he repaid them by allowing everything to get to the point where it was now. He'd dragged them to the bottom where he was. He wasn't the ideal image of a good family member.

The sunset...

And then there was Yuna. He knew they were never meant to be the moment he found out the truth. When the fayth told him where he'd come from, and the fact that he was only a projection of their old lives, it was clear to him that his time with her was only temporary. He had betrayed her by giving her hopes of them being a team for as long as they lived, and then completely shattering those dreams when he disappeared. But it was as his mirror image said: this wasn't his life.

The sunset!

While he lamented, he raised an eyebrow at the sun's unusual glow. It was accompanied by thousands of tiny, tiny versions of itself. All each shining with the same level of radiance. They had been whispering to him. They weren't random particles of the sun just floating around in the atmosphere. The balls of light were pyreflies. Memories of the dead. They were shining before him, whispering to him. He'd found it. The heart of broken memories.

That's it! He reached for his sword and started towards the sun.

"Where do you think you're going?" the double snapped. "Do you really think that's going to work?"

Tidus turned his head to looked at his image, its face now disfigured and unrecognizable. "You're right, this isn't my world. And I should've stayed where I belonged, on the otherside with all the memories." He tightened his grip around the sword's handle, his confidence growing. "But it doesn't matter if it's not my world. What matters now is that I need to fix the damage that was done and stop it from getting worse. If I just give up and waste away, then Spira will just continue to be screwed. I'm not gonna disappear and leave them to clean this mess up by themselves. I'm gonna save them. All of them. If it's the last thing I do!"

The double laughed and its voice was now that of a hundred dark souls. "As you wish..."

The island blackened before him and he opened his eyes to find himself plastered against the ground with his limbs outstretched. He wasn't at the island at all and the way his arms and legs were bound to the surface meant that he couldn't have shaken himself awake. But his strength had come back and he hoisted himself up. His head was spinning and his vision was blurry. But he could see the heart more clearly now. If he looked closely, he could see people inside the pyreflies. They were people who had once lived and now had become stories. If he could spend this time searching, eventually he would find himself in it.

But he couldn't because the ground had begun to shake violently. He fell onto his hands and saw a crack forming in between them. He rolled his body onto his side as the cave broke apart into small, unstable platforms. Below them, a vortex spread from the bottomless pit that was this monster up into the infinite sky. His breathing had quickened as he frantically looked for the heart. It was on the highest platform close to where the vortex ended.

"You can't stop me," a voice told him. "You are only one person. You're no one and you're weak."

Tidus refused to listen and yelled into the void as he leaped onto the next platform. Fiends greeted him when he landed. Their intention was to knock him off the platform, he figured, as they only attacked by swinging their arms. He chose to ignore them and hopped onto the next level.

"Come on..." he told himself as he made the next jump. He nearly fell into the vortex as a massive fiend tried to run him down. He was fortunate that he had strong legs. The fiend didn't give him time to reach for his sword before it charged towards him again. He had an idea. His feet were planted firmly against the ground and before the fiend could reach him again he leaped upwards and jumped onto its back, forcing it off the platform. He watched it get swallowed by the swirling whirlpool underneath him.

"Stay away..." the voice pleaded. "It's futile. Spira is doomed in this eternal spiral of death. It always has been."

He was standing on the platform before the heart. It was much higher up than the rest. He ran back to the other side of the ground and use all of the force in his legs to lift himself into the air. But the platform moved upwards.

"AH!" he yelled as his hand managed to grab onto the edge just in time. His fingers were slipping and the part of the ground he was holding on to was starting to crack.

"FOOL!" the voice yelled. "I am the most powerful creature to exist on this planet! I am death! I am the eternal darkness this world deserves! There will be no more living! I am unstoppable!"

"No you're not..." Tidus mumbled and pulled himself upwards with his other arm. He used the last bit of his strength to stretch out his arm towards the heart. The world around him began to shake again and he was straining his arm by expanding it farther than he'd ever been used to. Water fell from his eyes from the pain and the energy he was losing, but he didn't care. He reached and he reached and shouted into the air as his arm felt as though it were on fire until his finger touched the thin layer of the luminous gathering of pyreflies. His entire body was absorbed in an envelope of white light and warmth.