Going to keep it short, health-wise it was a struggle last month. Stay safe everyone!
I do not own any rights to the vampire academy… They belong to Richelle Mead
My Grammar may not be perfect but hopefully, you will like the story! If you have nothing nice to say I suggest you read something else! Otherwise enjoy ;)
Chapter 18 Paging Doctor Belikov, You Are My Future,
DPOV
Bringing Alberta to see Sonya was exhausting. Not in an upsetting more of an emotional rollercoaster. Every time she held her hand she sobbed praying for a miracle. That she give up her own life to save that of Rose. It seemed even that she had a breaking point. They say some people age when they are grieving. I think, I even added a few years with everything that has been going on. With miss Petrov, it was happening before my eyes. A mask that broke into a million pieces finally showing all the sadness she has been hiding. Looking into the mirror tears are forming in the corners of my eyes. Wobbling a bit I lay down in one of the beds the doctors use between shifts. As soon as my head touches the pillow I am out. Not surprised with everything that has been going on. Functioned on less sleep, learned quickly to even sleep in the most comfortable places. Behind my desk, back seat of my car, trust it is a tight squeeze for me.
Instead of reliving today's events or are they yesterdays? Who knows how much time has passed. My surroundings are pitch black, odd. In the darkness, I see a light that is beckoning for me to follow it. My feet feel a little light making it appear as if I am floating. The stone path appears when I am getting closer. Must be losing my mind, I need to rest more if my mind is starting to make this up. Rolling my eyes at my own thoughts I almost miss the shadow passing me by. Not wanting to wake up yet I try to think of something else. Clearing my mind, picturing a place I rather am than this emptiness. After a few failed attempts I give up. Curiosity in the end gets the better of me as I start chasing it. However, it seems to have reached its destination. Stopping at a largely empty street. Not a person or even a breeze of wind in sight. Yet it gives a feeling of familiarity.
Stepping closer to one of the windows I study the wooden frame. It has small lights every 5 inches. Touching the pattern that is carved into it, it starts to glow. Before my eyes I see a memory appear I always clung unto. There is my beautiful Roza walking down the street. She didn't know I was observing her. How could I not, her aura was something I have never encountered in my life before. Her brown locks are floating in the air as she rushes to get to the bus in time. Cursing like a sailor when it drives off without her. I do my best to hold my laughter. My eyes follow her when her foot gets stuck behind a tile. Doing her best to remain standing she gets more furious. Checking if anyone is watching I pretend to be bored.
She thinks the first time I saw her was when she parked her car in the wrong spot. No, that was the moment I was able to come closer to her. Have her brown orbs pierce my soul. All her attention was on me. Even angry she is beautiful like an avenging angel. Other men watching her didn't deserve to have her. Didn't recognize this possessiveness inside me. Scaring me, making me want to flee. Yet at the same time, I wanted to be close like my soul knew she was my other half. Felt like I would just taint her with the darkness inside me. What if to all the people I got close to I'd be a bad luck charm instead of the good kind.
Nightmares I had of her laying on an operating table helpless would come back every night. Calling out to me, paralyzed I could do nothing but watch. See how she would disappear before my very own eyes. Ignoring them I told myself it was just the demons of the past trying to influence me. Still, I let it get to me.. Feeling a sting inside my chest I walk a step back. Placing my hand there I feel the silly plastic necklace Rose gave me. Won at a childish carnival game. Dangling from it is a tiny cowboy hat. Still hear her say it 'Face it, Comrade, you rather be in the wild west catching bank robbers. You can pretend to be a doctor but the heart wants something else.' What she didn't know then, was that she was right. My heart longed for the freedom they have riding their horses. Escaping the reality of my life. God, her ability to chip away at the stone wall I surrounded my heart with had me running for the hills. Pushing her away like a coward I was. THUMP, THUMP, THUMP! Sound becomes louder, my eyes are blinded by a flash. A small figure is approaching me fast. This can't be, my breathing starts to become ragged. Whatever is going to happen I need to face it. No more running Dimitri, floating she places her small hands on my chest as she smiles. When I am about to tell her how sorry I am she speaks starling me. 'Stop letting the past leak into your future. You need to wake up! She needs you, NOW!' More hands appear pushing me from a cliff I didn't know was there. Waiting to reach the solid rock ground. Experience the pain of all my bones chattering, I feel nothing. Gasping for air I wake up confused. A disembodied voice close to my ear makes me sit upright within seconds.
'Go!' one word is all it takes. Not needing any explanation I am out the door. My feet are slapping against the concrete drawing attention to me. Normally I pride myself on my ability to be silent. This is not the time to be stealthy. Fighting the pain of my muscles I run faster. A girl around the age of 15 bumps into me. Grabbing my arm she has a goofy smile. Almost like she is going to fall asleep any moment now. Holding onto the fabric of my shirt she manages to whisper something before falling further. 'Her light will shine when mine is extinguished.' Calling for a nurse I gently lay her on the ground. Grimacing I apologize then leave her there. Normally I would take a look or check to see if she is ok. There is no time, I need to, I need to…
Sweating I am almost there, just a few feet away when I hear the most heartbreaking sound. Jumping on the bed like a predator is pouncing on its prey I start manual CPR. Letting her know she is not getting away from me, not holding back. She is going to be my wife, mother of my children, this is not her destiny. Death will not take her away from me! Allowing all my emotions to consume my every thought. I finally get what my teacher once told me during a lecture. 'When the time is there, you will be able to work like a machine. That moment you know that no matter what happens you gave it you're all. Never forget Belikov, emotions are not your enemy, they will make you thrive.' I laughed with Ivan for hours, repeating his words. Mocking him for even telling me that. Now, it hits me, he has always been right. This time losing isn't an option. Can't do this alone dammit, 'IVAN!' right after I said it I see a pair of hands covering mine. Mimicking everything I am doing.
Scooting back I step off as he takes over. Nodding at me I take a breather. Trusting him to help her. I won't be any help to her now. Looking at my normally steady hands they are shaking. Too tired to focus my vision blurs a little. The world is spinning around me. What I do hear, is a woman screaming. Everything seems to be going fast after that moment. Like the last few hours have been fast-forwarded. Can't even remember how I got into the waiting area. I do know that I am surrounded by love. Friends, family-supporting me while I try to hold it together. Making sure I drink something to stay hydrated. Eat a few bites of something. Taste like cardboard to me but their words have me open my mouth every time it is presented to me. 'You are going to need your strength Dimka. Roza doesn't want you to neglect yourself.'
Zoya climbs onto my lap then cuddles up to me. Comforting her uncle, that is a giant in comparison to her small frail body. Holding her tightly I don't care that everyone sees. Crying I fall apart in front of them. Out of breath Christian comes to a stop putting a hand on my shoulder. Saying the words that always make one person the happiest in the world. While another is broken from the loss. To me right now they are the best thing I ever heard. 'It is a match, the donor, still will be a waiting game. But it is a chance for a fresh start.' Looking up at the ceiling I close my eyes. Silently thanking the person that gave their life to save my Roza...