The first time Kit Fellowes saw Sirius Black she was eleven years old. He had stumbled upon her in the middle of King's Cross, making her trip on the dirty floor with all her luggage. She was shy by nature, the kind of girl who would apologise to someone even if not necessary. Their parents always said they were proud to have raised such a kind little woman, but she begged to disagree. There was nothing to be proud about someone who could not stand up for themselves. Eventually Sirius Black noticed her, lying on the pavement, a very bad looking scraped knee already showing on her pale skin.

"I didn't see you. Do you need help?" he asked, looking at her with a worried look on his eyes. His eyes struck her. She had never seen such beautiful ones, neither she had ever known someone with grey eyes. Greyish, sure, but that shade was totally new to her.

"I'm fine. Thanks" she managed to answer, and Sirius was clearly ready to reply, but he was cut off by a tall, noble and intimidating woman. Probably his mom, she thought to herself while rearranging her luggage. The woman gave her a knowing look, noticing her Muggle clothes – her favorites, by the way, and shook her head disapprovingly.

"You shouldn't be talking with this scum. Come along now, you don't want to be late on your first day" she hissed to her son, tugging at his right arm with insistence.

She had called her scum. She wished her dad didn't stop some steps behind to chat with a friend from work, so he could have given the lovely lady a proper answer for her unpleasantness. She didn't even know the meaning of that word, but she could swear it was nothing good.

Sirius had turned to look at her over his shoulder one last time, a curious glint in his eyes, and then followed his mother with hung shoulders.

That was a hell of a welcoming. Well done, Kit, she hummed to herself, then proceded to look around for her disappeared father.

She turned out to be an Hufflepuff. No one in her family was surprised, knowing her nature, and she received a congratulations letter from her mother, soon followed by another one coming from her sister.

Kit-kat, i heard you made it into the badgers! Many congrats, sis, i mean it. Im sorry if I didn't make it to the station, but you know Mum, always busy. And i don't have my Apparition license yet! Again, love, sorry. How do you like it so far? Made some friends? Hope you'll love it as I did. About Mom, don't even start worrying she's disappointed you didn't get in Ravenclaw. She's not. I don't know if her letter reached you yet, but she bids you well. We miss you, sweetie. Can't wait to see you during Christmas.

Lots of love,

Liane.

She had no friends yet, unless exchanging an awkard hello with Sirius Black could be defined "having a friend". But her sister didn't need to know that.

He later apologised for his mother's behaviour, taking her aside in a corner of the second floor she'd never seen before. She said it was nothing, but he obviously didn't believe her that much. My mother and I don't get along at all. I don't think about you the same way as her, he wanted to make that clear. She had smirked a little bit, because the idea of him thinking about her was appealing to eleven-years-old her. But nonetheless she had nodded seriously and thanked him. Since then, something between them was born. And never died.

Eventually she truly made some friends. There was Sylvie, who had been her roommate since day one, the one she considered her closest friend. There was something absolutely positive about Sylvie's bluntness, it made her want to be less condescending, bolder than she'd ever been. And Lanie, the girl from Ravenclaw that always sat beside her during Potions. And the Ferrars twins, Joe and Tony, who were always very kind to her. Oh, even Lily Evans, from Gryffindor, who always helped during her Transfiguration homework. She began to loathe the subject, but having it explained by Lily made it a bit nice from time to time.

Lastly, Sirius Black. They had the strangest of the relationships, but Kit liked that about them. She couldn't call him her friend, but she couldn't define theirs a simple acquaintance either. Why she thought that, she couldn't say. Maybe the looks they gave each other in a mute understanding, or the shared passion for Quidditch, or maybe just the knowledge they had been each other's first met before even arriving at Hogwarts. They were not friends, but Kit sincerely and secretely wished it could happen sometime.

Indeed in her years at Hogwarts she learnt about her love for Quidditch, even if it was just as a spectator. In fifth year Sylvie managed to be on the Hufflepuff team, and Kit liked to be on the stands during practice, with a blanket on her shoulders, and a textbook to read if she got bored – it rarely happened. She wasn't a sports girl, something her father always complained about, but Quidditch seemed relaxing to her, even if she couldn't play it all. She had even tried playing with the Ferrars twins and their other siblings a few times over summer break but it had been a total failure. So, she was perfectly content with watching the players fly around, stopping Bludgers, tossing Quaffles around the pitch all afternoon long.

On a cold November evening, a few weeks before the Hufflepuff vs Ravenclaw match, she was approached by Black on the stands, hands in his pockets, his slender neck uncovered, even if it was damn cold that day.

"Hi there, Kitty. How is it going?" he nodded towards the pitch, where Sylvie was currently chasing the Snitch up in the sky.

"I don't like Kitty. Makes me think of a cat" she shuddered, hugging the cover tighter around her shoulders.

"Don't you like cats? Most people do" he asked with a sneaky smile on his lips. He sat next to her on the wood bench, taking out of his pocket a pack of Muggle cigarettes.

"I guess they're alright. I mean, they're not my… Wait a sec, why are you here?" she questioned back, raising her eyebrows.

"Fancied a fag. Do you still smoke?"

They talked in hushed tones while smoking, even if no one could ever hear them properly. It seemed right that way. Between them it always was.

"You know you can't actually be here? When Brighton notices you here she'll freak out at your Captain friend. Again" she said, releasing some smoke in the chilly night.

"Captain Brighton can kiss my ass, as far as I'm concerned" he remarked with a snort.

"You wish" she commented with sarcasm. Sirius turned his face to her, surprise clearly all over his face.

"What, you like the lass?"

"You speak like a proper Scottish. And yeah, I like her. I mean, I'm not in love with her or anything but God, she's gorgeous"

He squinted his eyes at her words. Kit tried her best not to laugh, but it wasn't an everyday thing being capable of shutting up the Sirius Black.

"I didn't know you liked girls, Kitty"

"I like boys, too. Does that weird you out?"

"I don't think so. No. It's your business"

"Good"

They shared an uncomfortable silence, their elbows grazed against each other, but neither of them minded it. They were too busy in their own over-thinking.

"I won't probably go home over Christmas" she heard him say before Vanishing his cigarette in the air.

"Do I get to know why?"

"Mother is a cunt" he responded fiercely, steering away from her look.

"Already knew that" she murmured with a fag still between her lips.

"You are so not Hufflepuff"

"Why is she a cunt this time?"

"She wants me to hang out with proper people, so she wrote this afternoon"

"That's why you're here?"

"Kind of. I told you, fancied a smoke"

"Sure you did. Did you answer her?"

"I wouldn't know what to write to her other than foul words"

"I'd be honest. That you'll take no compromise. Even if you four can be straight bullies, and I don't like that about you lot, you are each other's people"

He stared at her in silence, bewildered.

"Uhm, I guess. Sorry, too deep. Didn't mean to"

"You are right, though. Thanks"

Another silence grew between them, the wind was so lashing she couldn't make out what the players were yelling to each other. She looked in Sirius' direction, noticing again his naked neck.

She removed her scarf from her throat, and silently wrapped around him.

He said nothing, and looked down to the yellow and black patterns on his body.

"I look like a bee" he pouted.

She couldn't help but laugh so hard her cheeks started to hurt a certain point.

They got to smoke just one more cigarette each before Captain Brighton noticed him there beside Kit and started cursing his whole name.

It was a girls' night, as Sylvie liked to say, even if Kit thought it to be a silly definition, the tradition had started to grow on her. Usually that meant they would spend their night in the dormitory singing random disco songs – as well as ABBA's, doing drinking games with their other friends, watching a movie on the projector that Phoebe, one of her roommates, managed to snuck in at the beginning of the new term. A relatively quiet night, to say the least.

"God, I really needed this" Ava said while sniffing a bit. She tended to get a little bit emotional while drunk, and was currently moaning about her ex boyfriend Jude, a quiet Slytherin who had broken up with her over summer without apparent reason.

"He must have found someone else during summer. Ugh, this is awful" Marine snorted, tossing the bottle to Kit.

"I think he did because of that job in London. Long distance could be hard, Ava" considered Phoebe with a wise look on her young face. That made Kit snigger. She couldn't consider herself drunk but, boy, she definitely was tipsy.

"Something fun, Kit?" Claire asked.

"I was thinking… I don't know, really" she actually laughed this time, and the other girls soon followed in tow.

"Why do we have to talk about boys all the time?" asked Marine, faking annoyance.

"What do you want to talk about?" deadpanned Claire.

"Ugh, beats me. What about… girls?" she said after some deep thinking about it.

"Girls are good" murmured Kit with an approving tone.

"Pass me over some sweets, would you, Kit?" intervened Sylvie, apparently uninterested to their chit-chats.

"Here, my queen" she joked, producing herself in a fake hail. Sylvie ruffled her hair and took the bag of sweets without saying no more.

"Didn't you eat anything?"

Kit stilled.

"Not hungry"

"But you love these"

"Not tonight"

"What's up, Kit?"

"Nothing, Sylvie. I swear"

"It's true when they say that Hufflepuffs are terrible liars" Marine said crossing her arms on her stomach.

"I just… I don't know. I saw myself in the mirror last week and I feel so ugly. Ugh, give me this" she said to Claire, snatching the bottle of liquor from her hands.

She gulped some in a few moments, and her head definitely felt dizzier than before.

"I know there's nothing I can say to convince you of the contrary, but just because you gained some pounds over summer it doesn't mean you're ugly. You know that fat doesn't mean ugly, hell, you taught me that!" Ava snapped from her daydream, making Sylvie jump out of fear.

"Yeah, well, I can't even follow my own advices" Kit said with a hint of sadness in her voice.

A knock on the door snapped them out of their reveries.

"Hide the fucking booze, quickly" Marine hissed, cleaning her bed in a hasty manner.

"Who is it?" Sylvie asked with her mouth full of sweets.

"Message for Fellowes!" some girl yelled from outside.

"What?" Kit asked, bored. She ducked the bottle out of the bed and took several sips. Some of it dripped on her tank top.

"There's Black downstairs. He said he wants to talk to you"

She almost choked on the liquor. Sylvie snickered, while Phoebe swiftly proceded to take the bottle away from her.

"Is that all?" Kit screamed, wiping her mouth with her wrist.

She and Sirius haven't had a proper conversation in what felt like, ages. But truthfully, the last time they actually spoke was just before summer break. And they were now approaching November. Ages indeed, she thought. The girl knew he left his parents' house in July, since he had sent her a letter to inform her of the news, but that was that. He never replied to her answer.

"He said to hurry!" the girl said hastily before running quickly away.

"What the heck wants Sirius Black from you?" Ava asked, confused.

"Beats me, really" she echoed Marine's words from earlier, than started laughing again.

"The Sirius Black in the Badgers' area. To what I owe the pleasure?" she sneered, when she got visual of him.

He was standing loosely against the wall, looking quite messy altogether. Maybe he was drunk too. Ops, tipsy.

"Are you pissed?" he asked with amusement. He was not drunk, so it seemed.

"Slightly. I think" she remarked, standing beside him with crossed arms on her chest.

"Is that why you're lacking your usual three layers of wool?" he asked. Kit could feel his glance on her. His eyes were looking at her in a way she didn't know it actually existed. She felt her cheeks redden violently. He truly was shameless.

"Oh, fuck. I forgot to dress" she cursed, making him actually smile with all of his teeth.

"We didn't manage to talk since term started" he started, and Kit could swear he seemed a bit awkward being there, starting the whole "serious talk" thing. No pun intended.

"Yep. Heard you're stayin' with the Potters now" she murmured, looking her naked feet. They were truly unpleasant to look at. God.

"I'm sorry if I didn't aknowledge you lately. Things have been pretty hectic" he apologised, his tone going on softer notes. That made her almost forget she actually was a bit angry with him. But he seemed to feel quite guilty about it. Served him right.

"Yeah, well. No worries" she said truthfully. She couldn't forget he actually forgot about her for months, but she was always too easy when it came to these kind of things. Her dad always said she was such a softie. Yeah, a softie dumbass.

"I mean it" he insisted.

"I know you mean it. That's why I'm telling you not to worry"

He smiled again, and Kit cursed herself into tomorrow trying not to start smiling with every teeth she had. It wasn't that she was a softie. Well, that too, but truly she was soft for him and him only. Always had been. Disgustingly, if one may add.

"Cool. So, what were you doing? There's a party that I don't know of?"

"No. It's kind of a girls' night, so to say. God, that definition is so cringey"

Sirius gave her his signature smirk, tugging at his loose necktie like it was suffocating him. He was ridiculously messy that evening.

"It is. I've never seen you drunk before" he observed quietly, tucking a stray of her dark hair behind her ear. His fingers stilled for an endless moment. She felt her skin tingle under his hand. She wasn't used to have someone touching her anymore. The last time she had a girlfriend had been sometime around fifth year, and after her she was asked out by a fellow Hufflepuff but it didn't work out well. It didn't work out at all.

"You didn't see me drunk, at all. I'm tipsy" she remarked with a convinced tone, staring at his fingers leaving her face.

"Sure you are. But, look, I wanted to tell you something"

"Yes?"

"Next week I'm going to be seventeen. I kinda already know the guys are throwing me a surprise party and, well, I'd like you to be there"

"It's not a surprise party, then" she just said, keeping him on his toes.

"It is in the intentions. Now, would you come?"

"Yes. But it is not a surprise party if you already know"

"Peter accidentally told me. He's a bit dense sometimes"

"How?"

"He said, would you like to get the booze for Sirius' surprise party or shall I?"

"Oh, God, he is dense" she laughed airily.

He ruffled his own hair, making them even more matted now. And that tie, and his shirt… Why was he so messy?

"Did you fuck someone before coming here?" she blurted in a second. Fucking. Hell.

"What?"

"I'm sorry. It's just…You look so… messy? More than usual. James Potter like. God, I am drunk" she stuttered, exhaling loudly. He shook his head, biting his teeth in his lower lip to restrain himself from laughing square in her face.

"I went out for a fly" he said, slowly.

"Oh. Well, yes. Of course. I'm truly sorry. I was just wondering... why, you know?"

"I guess. It's alright, Kitty. I'm not offended. Even if you basically said I look like shit"

"You look nice. You always do"

The words slipped from her mouth before she could do anything to stop them. The look in his eyes softened, his irises looked like melted iron.

"You always do, too" he murmured, looking all over her face, and hair, and neck, and she felt so goddamn hot even if her feet were freezing in the dark hallway. She had to go back. She couldn't ditch her friends like that. Even if the wish was quite strong.

"I... I would like to stay here right now" she answered honestly, looking flushed on her cheeks.

"Then why don't you?"

"Must go back. It's girls' night, after all"

"No place for me in your girls' night?"

"I'm afraid not. Where will be this surprise party you told me about?"

"I reckon Peter said it will be in the greenhouses. Eight o' clock. Sort of"

"The greenhouses? It'll be fucking cold" she swore, hugging herself with her arms. It started to be fucking cold there too, but she didn't want to leave Sirius yet.

"There are such things like Heating Charms, ever heard of them?" he asked mischievously. Kit rolled her eyes at that. Honestly.

"Still, fucking freezing. Your friends have lost their mind"

"I'm not sure they ever had one" he replied, faking a thoughtful expression.

"You surely are right on that. Well, I must be off" she said with a bit of reluctance. He surely noticed, but choose to say nothing.

"Alright. Are your roommates as drunk as you?"

"Ava is. But she's the worst kind of drunk in the world" she scoffed, raising her eyes to look at him. He was amused. Again.

"How so?"

"She's a mopey drunk"

"Good luck with that. They truly are the worst"

"Aye. I'm glad you showed up. I don't know if I should say it, but I missed having you around" Kit admitted. Alcohol was being a proper bitch to her. She liked to be honest, most of the days, but that honest? She was digging her own grave.

"You make me look like I'm a dog" he complained childishly, crossing his arms with a scoff.

"You are"

"Oh?"

If she didn't know him well enough, she would have said he had become nervous all of a sudden.

"Sirius. The Dog Star. Honestly, you don't even remember your own name"

"I beg your pardon, I know my name very well indeed"

"And now you're speaking like Dumbledore"

"I decided I don't like drunk Kitty anymore"

"I guess I'll live"

"I missed you, too"

"I know"

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. But it's good to hear. Goodnight"