Nostalgia Critic: "Helloooo Im The Nostalgia Critic. I Remember It So You Don't Have To! And Welcome Back To Total Drama Crossing The Multiverse. And Last Where We Left Off, Trent Lied About His Feelings For Gwen, And Knowing About Their Relationship Now, I Can See Why They Arent Doing Anything. And Rick...Surprisingly Knows About The Seedreen...AND WILL THIS WIMPY EXCUSE OF A FOX DO ANYTHING AT ALL?! So Will Anything Happen On This Numb Ass Island In-"
Unknown Addiance: "MAINE!"
Nostalgia Critic: "Wait...This Is Maine? OH COME FUCKING ON! IS STEPHEN KING WRITTING THIS?! I KNOW HE IS A GOOD WRITTER BUT...JESUS! WHY ARE IN MAINE?! Whatever. It Is Time...For Total Drama Crossing The Multiverse!"(Walks Off)"Someone Give Me A Shot Glass!"
(INTRO)
Meanwhile With Team NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERDS!(Sorry...)
Rick: "Seriously? Now He Hired The Nostalgia Critic?"
Stan: "Okay Chris's New Manager Is Just Werid!"
Pyrrha: "No Shit."
Ash: "I Know He Didn't Grow Up With Pokemon, But This Dosn't Give Him To The Right To Insult Any Trainer."
Ed: "He Even Made Fun Of Good Burger."
Tails: "Insulting Sonic Kinda Made Sense..."
Cosmo: "He Insulted Sonic?!"
Rick: "Kinda Deserved It. Also Miss World Dominatrix Queen Of England, Here's Some Advice. DO NOT! Piss Him Off!"
Ed: "Why Didn't You Get Insulted?"
Rick: "I'm A Fucking Beloved Cartoon Character. Plus A Rick Appeared With His Morty Since That Happened. Then The Concel Of Ricks Showed Up."
Lindsey: "Wait...This Nostalgia Man Is A Cricket?"
Everyone Else: "NO!"
Rick: "Well Fuck You. Have Fun Thinking About Narutos Dick."
Lighting: "Ugh! This Is Annoying Sha-Lighting!"
Confessional-Courtney
Courtney: "Okay, Lindsey Has GOT To Go! She's Is Thinking About Narutos Dick All Day And It Might Cost Us Todays Challenge!"
Confessional-Shawn
Shawn: "If The Apcolypis Happened, She Would Be The FIRST To Die."
Confessional-Rick
Rick: "If We Do Lose, We Are Kicking Her Out. THAT Is Final."
Confessional-Lindsey
Lindsey: (Fingering Herself)Oh Yes...I Want That Dick Again!
Confessional-Nostalgia Critic
Nostalgia Critic: "Good God. I Am Currently Editing The Episode And I Saw A Clip Of Lindseys Failure! Jesus!"
Confessional ENDS
Then Everyone Arrived To Where Chef Is
Chef: "Well, You Punks Arrived Just In Time For Your Next Challenge."
Gwen: "Wheres The Nostalgia Critic?"
Chef: "Well, He's Setting Up The Challenge."
Then The Critic Came In Covered In Alot Of Blood
Critic: "OKAY! I Just Came Back After Killing 5 Buffalos And 5 Men From Canada In Order To Make This Happen."
...
Owen: "Whaaa...?"
Critic: "Your Challenge Is To Prank Call Everyone Without Refusing. If Ya Don't.(Demon Voice) GET YOU OF MY LAWN!"
This Has Scarred Them Alot
Chef: "He Means If Ya Don't Prank Call Everyone, Your Out."
Usagi: "Whoever Prank Calls The Most People, Wins Their Team Invicibitlty"
Critic: "Wait, So They ALL Get The Powers Of Turning Invisable?"
...
Chef: "That's Not What It Means."
Critic: "Oh...Werid. Anyway, Good Luck...Or Else."
...
Trent: "So...Who's Going Up First?"
...
Rick: "Eh, I'll Do It.(Picks A Random Person To Call)Hmmmm...A Person Named Rei...Eh, Seems Simple Enough.(Dails The Number)Wait...WHICH Rei?(The Phone Picks Up)Hello, Do You Know Anyone Named Usagi?...No?...Huh...Hold Up Why You Explaining About The Sky And Water?...Okay...What? Why Are Saying Spears All Over? Wait, What?"
The Phone Hung Up
Rick: "Hello?"(Hangs Up)
Critic: "What?"
Rick: "Some Idoit Picked Up The Phone Starts Speaking Gibberish And Said Spear Me Daddy."
Everyone Was A Bit Disgusted On What Rick Told Them What Happened.
...
Critic: "WHAAAAAAAAAAA?"
Rick: "Yeah, Her Words. Someone Else Pick A Name And Number From A Bowl?"
Gwen Picks Up A Name And Number
...
Gwen: "Seriously?"
Critic: "What? What's Wrong With FUCKING NUMBER?!(Takes It And Saw It Was A Forbidden Phone Number)...Nope"(Shoots The Phone Number With His Gun)Alright, Gwen Decides To Skip This One. Who's Next?"
Ash Got Up And Sees A Number That Got Him Confused
Ash: "Sweet Dick Shop?"
Critic: "What?"
Lindsey: "I Know Whos Dick That's Sweet~"
Everyone Groaned At What Lindsey Just Said
CONFESSIONAL-Rick
Rick: "What A Fucking Retard."
CONFESSIONAL ENDS
Ash Gulps And Calls The Number
Ash: "Hello?"
Phone Number: "HELLO! DO WANT YOUR DICK TO GROW INTO THE SIZE OF A 5 DOLLAR FOOT LONG?!"
Ash Hung Up And Was Disgusted
...
Critic: "I Didn't Even Pick These Out And Even I Feel Ashamed. NEXT!"
Owen Went Next And Picks Out A Number And Cheered In Victory And Saw That The Number Was From Pizza Hut, Then Owen Dailed The Number And It Picks Up
Owen: "HELLO! I WANT 5 PIZZAS 3 OF THEM MUST BE CHEESY BITES AND THE OTHER 2 ARE GARLIC CRUST! I ALSO WANT 30 BREADSTICKS! 40 WINGS! AND 2 HUGE BOTTLES OF SODA!"
Critic: "THATS AN INTIRE ORDER!"
Confessional-Owen
Owen: "I Accidentliy Skipped Lunch."
Confessional-Ends
Critic: "You Know What? Nevermind! Next Up Is Duncan"
Duncan: "Okay.(Picks Up The Phone And Dails A Number And It Didn't Pick Up)"
...
Confessional-Duncan
Duncan: "Weak."
Confessional ENDS
Critic: "Hmmmmm...Uh...Rick...Again"
Rick Picks A Number And Saw The Number
Rick: "Okay, You Want Me To(Burps)Prank Call Team Rocket? Wow...Just...Wow."(Calls Team Rocket)Hey Team Rocket I Am Giving You Ash's Pikachu. But You Have To Pay All Of The Companys Money. Meet Me On A Island Where Chris Mcclean Works."
Critic: "What?"
Rick: (Hangs Up)...Also Ash, I'm Giving Them A Peace Of My Mind.
Asd: "YOU WANT THEM TO TAKE PIKACHU?!"
Rick: "Yes."
Then Team Rockets Helecoppter Came In And Jessie And James Got Off
Jessie: Glad That Twerp Decided To Give Up His Pikac-
Then Rick Pushed The Nostalgia Critic At Them Which Knocks Jessie And James Out Then Mewoth Poked His Head Out To See Whats Happening, Only To See Rick Sanchez And Flew Away
Nostalgia Critic: "Ugh, What The Hell Rick?!"
Rick: "Simple, I Told Them To Pay With The Companys Money.(Grabs The Money Bag And Looks Inside)Holy Shit! Thats Alot Of Dough."
The Money Was Taken By A Helecopter With A Claw, Which Pisses Everyone Off
...
Nostalgia Critic: "Okay...So, I Have ONE More Number Left! One More That Can Change The Tides Of This Ga-(Sees Lindsey Using The Phone)WHAT THE HELL?! IT'S NOT YOUR TURN BITCH!"
...
Lindsey:"Oh Yes Naruto! I Shall Strip In Front Of Everyone!"
Nostalgia Critic: "Wait, What?"
Lindsey Takes Her Clothes Off And Everyone Covers Their Eyes, Except For Rick Because He Has Seen Shit Like This For Breakfast.
Rick: "What? I've Seen Worse."
Nostalgia Critic: "Oh My GOD! The Horror! The Horror!"(Runs Off And Cries His Eyes Out)EVERYONE HEAD BACK TO YOUR FUCKING CABINS!
Confessional-Nostalgia Critic
Nostalgia Critic: "Good God...I Know I'm Straight And I Get Turned On By Lesbians But...This?! THIS IS LIKE THE ANIMATED TITANIC FLIMS BUT ONLY HORNY PORN STARS ARE IN IT! GOD!...Seeing Her Strip For A Fucking Ninja?! THIS IS STUPID! STUPID! STUPID!(Starts Speaking In Fast Motion)STUPIDSTUPIDSTUPIDSTUPIDSTUPIDSTUPIDSTUPID! STUPID!
Confessional-Lindsey
Lindsey: "As A Proud Bisexual Woman, I AM PROUD TO BE FUCKED BY NARUTO!"
Confessional Ends
Meanwhile Back At The Cabins, Everyone Was Confused On Who Won And Who Lost.
...
Lindsey: "Does Anyone Wanna Know How BIG Narutos Dick I-"
Rick: "OH SHUT THE FUCK UP!"
Yugi: "You Scared Our Lives!"
Courtney: "AND YOU MUSTVE COST US THE CHALLENGE!"
Owen: "AND WE'RE ALL HUNGRY!
Rick: "You Just Had Pizza Hut For Lunch! How The In The Flying Fuck Are You Still Starving?!"
Then The Nostalgia Critic Came Back With Some Water And A Towel
Nostalgia Critic: "Okay, Uh...Due To...Lindsey Showing Everyone That Everywhere Is A FUCKING NUDE BEACH...Team...Jontron Wins!"
Team Jontron Celebrated Their Victory
Lightning: "SHA-SERIOUSLY?! Lighting Does NOT Deserve This!"
Nostalgia Critic: "So With That Being Said, Team Nerds, Say Fuck You To The One Who Made You All Lost The Challenge. Bye!"(Walks Off)
...
Lindsey: "Who Wants To See Me Fuck Naruto?"
Confessional-Rick
Rick: "Lindsey, Duh!"
Confessional-Shawn
Shawn: "Lindsey! No Question!"
Confessional-Squidward
Squidward: "GET RID OF LINDSEY!"
Confessional-Sky
Sky: "Do I NEED To Ask?"
Confessional-Courtney
Courtney: "Bye Bye Lindsey. You Won't Be Missed!"
Confessional-Pyrrha
Pyrrha: "Lindsey. I Know 4 Of My Friends Are Bi And They Would NEVER Do Anything Like That On Television"
Ceremony Time!
Nostalgia Critic: "Okay, So...Uh...(Counts The Marshmellow)1, 2, 3, 4, 5, Skip A Few, Only 17 Marshmellows! And Theres 18 Of You. Whoever Gets A Marshmellow, Will Be Spared. And For The One Who Does NOT Get Marshmellow, I Am More Than Willing To Bust A Cap In Their Ass."
This Scarred Everyone Which Caused Them To Gasp
Nostalgia Critic: "What? Was It Something I Just Said?(Gets A Call From The Manager)Hello?...Oh...Uh...Hang On.(Clears His Throat)I...Aplogize...I Uh...I Thought Someone Will Be Killed By Me...During A Game Show...Uh...Just...Forget Everything I Just Said...Anyway...(Tosses A Marshmellow To Whoever Is Safe)Owen, Duncan, Sky, Lighting, Caboose, Pyrrha, Stan, Steven, Ash, Ed...Fuck You(Gives The Marshmellow To Ed Regardless)Squidward, Yugi, Jasmine, Shawn, Rick, And Tails! You Guys Are SAFE! Now That Leads Lindsey And Courtney...Not Sure Why Courtney, But Lindsey? FUCK YOU WHORE! FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU!...Okay, Just Gotta, Get In Controll...The Last Marshmellow Goes To...(Tosses The Marshmellow To-)Lindsey! Wait What?
Courtney: "WHAT?! YOU GUYS VOTED HER OVER ME?! SHE STRIPPED NAKED INFRONT OF US! HOW IS THAT EVEN-"
Nostaglia Critic: "Yeah...I Have No Idea Why...Maybe It's My Own Karma Kicking Your Ass Or Something...HEY USAGI! CHEF! DRAG HER AWAY! And Make Sure To Correct Me Next Time!(Walks Off)
Chef And Usagi Grab A Hold Of Courtney And Drags Her Away
Courtney: "NO! NO! STOP! YOU GOT THE WRONG PERSON! I DO NOT CONSEED! I DO NOT CONSEED! I WAS YOUR ONLY HOPE! LET GO OF ME!"
Chef And Usagi Tossed Her Into The Vortex Of Shame
Courtney: "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!"
...
Nostalgia Critic: "Wow! Chris Was Right! This IS Awesome!"(Sees That Duncan Was Kind Of Upset)You...Okay?
Duncan:"Buzz Off."(Walks Off)
...
Nostalgia Critic: "Oooooookay?"
20 Minutes Before The Ceremony.
Someone Was Switching The Votes In Her Sleep And Was Saying "No, Do Not Do This! Please!"