Silent Night
We wish you a Merry Christmas
We wish you a Merry Christmas
We wish you a Merry Christmas
and a Happy New Year!
The chorus of voices rung out merrily all through 7 Mycroft avenue, as the smiling faces looked around at each other.
Lucien looked at Jean beaming "Right, everyone pick one gift to give someone"
Alice looked at him sternly "Isn't it customary to wait until Christmas morning to give out presents?"
Lucien grinned at her "not in this house"
Jean rolled her eyes at Alice "He's like a child honestly Alice, He just can't wait"
"Not to get them though, just to give them" Lucien was almost bouncing in his seat
Matthew grunted in amusement "Right, Well in that case, I'll go first" He placed his brandy glass on the table and pushed himself out of the chair he was seated in. He shuffled over to where the Christmas tree twinkled in the corner. He bent down with some difficulty and picked out a square present wrapped with a shiny red ribbon. He passed it to Alice and kissed her cheek "for you. Merry Christmas sweetheart"
Alice's cheeks turned red as they often did when Matthew showed any form of affection in front of others. She was slowly getting used to it around Jean and Lucien, but the thought of sharing their relationship with the rest of Ballarat made her breath quicken and palms sweat. "Thank you" she replied quietly. She slowly and carefully pulled the end of the ribbon.
Lucien groaned "Oh come on Alice, we'll be here forever if you take that long to unwrap it"
Jean threw Alice an exasperated look "See, I told you. Take your time Alice"
"Some of us like to savour the moment Lucien" she chided him as she slid her finger under the tape. Shifting uncomfortably under all the attention, she unfolded the brightly coloured paper to reveal a small intricately carved wooden jewellery box. It was a pretty thing, though, she thought it a bit strange, since she barely owned any jewellery. She smiled a smile that didn't quite reach her eyes "It's beautiful, Matthew"
"You're beautiful" he replied as he kissed her temple, oblivious to her slightly wooden reply.
"Alright enough, my turn!" Lucien interrupted them impatiently as he all but ran to the tree, plucked out a clumsily wrapped, lumpy looking gift and tossed it to Jean grinning.
As Jean unwrapped her gift she snuck a look at Alice. There was something off about her tonight, She seemed tense and more nervous than usual. She wouldn't meet Matthews eyes for long, and her shoulders were hunched with worry. She wondered what was on her mind and made a mental note to try and get her alone and ask her if she was alright.
After everyone had opened a gift, they gathered around the piano as Lucien led them in some carols. Lucien was beaming as he banged the keys with joy, Jean sang alongside him her clear voice singing harmonies learnt long ago in the church choir. Matthews' gruff bass voice mumbled along and Alice tried to keep up, not knowing some of the more obscure carols.
When they finished 'Oh Little Town of Bethlehem' Lucien looked around "Last song!" he sang "any requests?"
"Please Lucien, Can we do 'Silent Night?' Please?" Alice's clear voice stood out to him amongst Jean and Matthews suggestions.
Lucien immediately played an introduction to silent night and all went quiet as they began to sing.
Silent Night, Holy Night
All is calm, All is bright
Round yon virgin, mother and child
Holy infant so tender and mild
Sleep in heavenly peace
Sleep in heavenly peace
As Lucien played a bridge to the second verse Matthew reached out and grasped Alice's hand in his. As he smiled at her she felt her heart jump, and she couldn't help but smile back as they locked eyes and began the second verse.
Silent Night, Holy Night
Shepherds quake, At the sight
Glories stream from heaven afar
Heavenly hosts sing Alleluia
Christ the Saviour is born
Christ the Saviour is born
As they reached the last verse Lucien motioned them to keep singing and he stood from the piano and wound his arm around Jean as they sang the last verse unaccompanied.
Matthews arm wound around Alice's shoulders and for a brief moment, her worries melted away and she leant against his side, her hand snaking cautiously around his waist.
Silent Night, Holy Night
Son of God, Love's pure light
Radiant streams from thy holy face
With the dawn of redeeming grace
Jesus, Lord at thy birth
Jesus, Lord at thy birth
Jean's voice sang a descant which soared above the simple melody and Lucien gazed at his wife in wonder.
Matthew looked at the red head on his shoulder. Alice's voice was tuneful and simple and as the song reached its end he placed a soft kiss to the top of her head.
Alice looked up into his eyes and smiled as she saw the loving look Matthew was giving her. Her heart gave a jolt as she saw the passion in his eyes. She turned her head to rest it back on his shoulder as she was overcome with emotion.
Jean saw Alice's eyes fill with tears and it startled her. She had to know what was going on. "Right, Alice, let's go and make some eggnog"
Alice blinked out of her worry and grateful for something to occupy her mind, followed Jean into the kitchen as Matthew and Lucien headed to the lounge room. As soon as they were out of sight Jean rounded on her "Alice, What's going on?" Now that she was looking at Alice up close, she could see her eyes were red and bloodshot, and although her makeup was hiding it well, her skin was pale and clammy.
"I beg your pardon Jean?"
"You've not been yourself all night, Are you unwell?"
"I don't know what you mean" her shaking hand brushed her hair from her face. It was a balmy evening and her fringe was sticking to the beads of sweat that kept appearing on her forehead.
"Alice, come on, I know you, You look dreadful. You're all pale and sweaty, Your hands are shaking, and your eyes are red. Have you been having trouble sleeping?"
"Yes, No, I..." Alice's shoulders slumped
"I'm sorry Jean, It's just… Christmas, it's so odd, actually celebrating it, with people who love me, The presents, the singing, I find it so overwhelming. I'm not used to feeling so…" she searched for the word…. "loved" her cheeks flushed as she made a face and she raised a trembling hand to run her fingers through her hair. "It's such a foreign experience. I'm sorry, I've been trying to hide it. Do you think Matthew has noticed?"
"I doubt it." Jean scoffed "Men aren't usually so intuitive" Jean paused as Alice chewed on her lip "Is… is that all that's bothering you Alice? You really don't look well at all"
"Yes!" replied Alice, instantly defensive. Then deflating slightly "actually no" she looked away "Oh Jean, I don't know how to say this. I'm not used to" she gesticulated wildly "feelings"
Jean hid a smile at this awkward conversation but stayed silent, giving Alice space to think
"Jean, I'm worried"
"What's got you so worried?"
Alice didn't answer, She didn't know how to
"Surely you don't doubt Matthew's feelings for you?" Jean probed
"Maybe" Alice's stomach churned and she refused to meet Jean's eyes
Jean reached out and placed a hand on Alice's shoulder "Alice, Matthew is crazy about you! It's obvious to Lucien and I."
"But... then..." she faltered, then tried again "How did you know that Lucien was the one for you?"
"It happened so gradually, I guess" Jean smiled as memories flooded her mind "He drove me crazy for a very long time, and then one day I realised I couldn't go a day without seeing him, without sharing a smile, or a casual touch. And then I got on a bus… and he followed me" Jean smiled at her "Do you feel that way about Matthew?"
"I don't know. I don't know . Jean I'm just so worried I will lose him" Alice's voice was high pitched as her panic rose. Alice tried to slow her breathing as she felt her chest tighten.
"Lose him? What on earth do you mean by that? He hasn't exactly got a line of suitors at his door Alice" Jean chuckled at her own joke
"But what if one day he wakes up and realises how odd and how" her voice faltered "broken, I am? Jean he's going to realise I'm not worth the effort" a single tear tracked down her cheek
Jean's finger stopped the tear and wiped her cheek "Oh Alice. You mustn't think like that. When you love someone, you love all of them. Warts and all." She ducked her head down to look into Alice's eyes "Just look at Lucien and I"
Alice smiled slightly at that and Jean continued
"I mean, at any time I could have decided he wasn't worth it. After every stupid thing Lucien did, I could have decided to give up on him." She paused as Alice looked at her "Only I couldn't. Because I loved him. Even with all the idiotic things he does. I still love him."
Alice wiped her wet eyes and continued with a shaky voice "But…alright, then how do you reconcile your love for Lucien knowing he might get hurt every day? Doesn't it drive you crazy knowing one day he might not come home?" Her voice rose slightly as her heartbeat increased at the very thought of it "Matthew's already had an accident at work, what if he has another, and doesn't recover?" she swallowed nervously and took a few deep breaths to try to calm herself and continued in a quiet voice "Jean, How do I know it's worth risking my heart with him?"
Jean exhaled "Wow, you're really asking all the hard questions tonight aren't you?"
Alice sniffed "I'm a scientist. How can I be sure that he is the one for me? I need the proof."
"Well there I'm afraid I'm going to disappoint you my dear Alice. Love isn't about proof. It's about trust. When Lucien is out on police business, I trust that Matthew, or Charlie, or Bill will keep him safe. I trust that he will always come home to me, that he will always love me, no matter what, and I trust that when I give him my heart, he will look after it."
Alice stared into space
"Matthews a good man Alice, he's worth a little risk"
Alice sniffed again and wiped her eyes
Jean rubbed her arm "Everyone has doubts Alice, and it's good to talk things through. You know you can always come to me with anything. I can't promise to have all the answers, But I can be a listening ear, and a sounding board and I will try to help wherever I can" She paused "And If Matthew Lawson dares to hurt you in any way, shape or form, he'll have me to answer to, And believe me, I can make his life incredibly uncomfortable"
Alice gave a small smile
"There," Jean smiled at the brighter look on Alice's face "Now go and splash some water on your face and I'll get on with making the eggnog and then we can enjoy the rest of the evening together."
Alice looked at Jean and reached out her hand to grab hers. She clasped Jeans hand in her own "Thank you Jean. You and Lucien have been so kind to me"
"Alice you need to know we don't do any of this out of any sense of obligation, or pity. We enjoy having you here. You've got a wicked sense of humour, you're clever, I've lost count of the times I've heard Lucien sing your praises, and you make Matthew want to be a better person."
Alice looked away and began to chew on her bottom lip.
Jean continued "Alice as soon as you two started seeing each other Matthew began to take his physical therapy much more seriously. And you've seen the results yourself. He's much more confident getting around. Alice, Lucien and I credit you with that. He's also much less grumpy" they both laughed as she swung Alice's hand which was still clasped around her own.
'I'm so glad you are my friend Jean" Alice's voice was quiet "I've never had friends like this before" she continued seriously, as her breath caught in her throat "Will you always be my friend?"
"Always" Jean promised
"No matter what?" Alice continued
"Of course Alice"
Alice let go of Jean's hand and smiled an unsure smile at her as she went to leave the kitchen
"Alice?" Jean called.
Alice stopped and turned around to look at Jean
"I'm glad you are my friend too" Jean offered as she smiled at her.
A warmth spread in Alice's heart as her face flushed. She smiled a bit wider this time and continued on to the bathroom.
Matthew took the eggnog offered to him by Alice
"I was surprised to hear you request Silent Night before"
Alice smiled "I have some good memories of that song. Probably the only Christmas song I have good memories of" she continued
During her childhood, Christmas had never been an important date in the year, her family never attending church services, or family gatherings, and Alice had spent many Christmases amusing herself along with her sister, and trying to keep out of her fathers way. So it was a surprise to her to find herself enjoying a family Christmas with her found family.
"Silent night was one that my sister and I would sing together." She sipped her eggnog "I don't know a lot of other carols"
"I just figured you wouldn't be one for the virgin birth side of things" Matthew continued.
"Jean and I have had some very interesting conversations lately, around faith and science, and I for one, believe they can co-exist" she announced
Matthew was taken aback. He glanced at her face to be sure she wasn't pulling his leg, but no she was serious.
"I mean I'm not saying I'm going to start attending church or anything" she saw his face and laughed "but Jean does raise some interesting points"
Matthew raised his eyebrows in astonishment and took a sip of his eggnog to hide his surprise. He coughed as an alcoholic warmth spread to his ears "Good lord Jean, What did you put in this eggnog!"