—
When I was young, I wanted adventure. We don't need to talk about what I want now. It doesn't matter.
But I imagine that spark is what made the Sorting Hat place me in Gryffindor. I haven't felt brave in many years, not with the world breathing down my neck. With the glares and sneers my parents receive. Because of me. Because of what I am, not who I am.
I am too young to be so tired.
It happened in 1964. It happened while I was dreaming. Dreams are not a luxury I can afford now; nightmares are all that I am spared. But that night, bathed in the grey blue glow of the full moon, I was dreaming.
I was on one of my regular adventures. Waving a stick as a wand in the woods behind my house, taking down boggarts who thought they were being sneaky, dancing in the trees. I knew better.
"Ridik-CUE-lus! Ridik-CUE-lus!" I was screaming. Triumphant, triumphant.
Until the screams coming from my mouth were not punctuated by tiny giggles. Until my throat started feeling strained and scratchy. And suddenly, the light of the full moon was real, the screams were real. The blood running down my arms was real.
There are scars draped over my body that I wish could be unseen.
Don't look?
—
My life is small. It comes in bits and pieces, and tastes plain as a table cracker. Little salt for bravery, that's it. Had not much growing up, just Mum. Mum and me, and our small cottage by the sea. 'S all right, though. We're comfortable. Happy.
Lonely, maybe.
Till I got to Hogwarts. Sat by this boy on the carriage, who looked as empty as my insides sometimes felt. The Grayness, I call it. Seeps in when I'm not looking. Have to be careful. It riles emotions I'm not looking to capitalize on. Negative things. Like silent anger and sweeping envy.
I'm fine most of the time. I have my friends. The quiet one, especially. Finding me like that on the train. Introducing me to the others. I'm sure he's the reason I made it into Gryffindor. Though, I suppose the Hat can't lie.
Can't it?
—
Being born into the wrong family doesn't give you the right to be an arsehole. It's a job, you see, working against your own genetics. I was born to do one thing. Meant to do it.
Join that Dark Lord and all his lot.
The last name of Black carries a lot of weight. Some think because it equates to darkness, but I know better. It equates to power in this world—a power I'm not interested in. Dark or light or bloody pink for all I care, I want nothing to do with it. I have no interest in cruelty and punishment.
I'm punished enough.
For being born wrong. For being sorted wrong. For my backwards attitude and my angry heart and my proclivity to impulsivity and big-mouthed-ness.
Yeah, I've got problems. Problems that are none of your fucking business problems.
Wanna bite?
—
People like to think rich boys don't have problems. Well, of course we bloody do. The problem is, most of us rich boys don't like to acknowledge our privilege in being problematic, that we've got all these legs up and no room to complain.
So I don't complain. I mean, yeah, to my friends I do. But to the rest of the school, I'm the big-headed Head Boy with a bullying problem and a weakness for redheads.
Besides, my problems aren't anything other than what I bring on myself. My parents? They're lovely. My grades? I'm a genius. But I suppose it's my fault I befriended these buggers in the first place. So their problems are my problems.
Come at me, yeah?
—
Messrs. Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot, and Prongs, Purveyors of Aids to Magical Mischief-Makers, are proud to present: THE MARAUDER'S MAP.Adventure if you dare.
—
A/N: Hello, lovelies. I don't know if I'm here to stay, or if this just a hobby for my writing life. But here I am, for the foreseeable future! *This is cross-posted BY ME on , so if you see it there by "mini marauder," know it's still me and not plagiarism!*
For years (and years and years) I've wanted to write the Marauders' tale. I've done it before. But this feels different. I'm going to experiment a bit as I journey along in this story. I barely know where it's going, and that's okay. But we shall see.
Adventure with me? Let's bring our lions out.