Author's Note: Hey, so, please be aware there is probably no way to really fit this neatly into the timeline. I am aware there is a convenient spot between books 3 and 4, I've heard there's a timeskip of some sort, I just haven't read that far yet. So, this story is vaguely set somewhere in the books, and the order of events probably don't really make sense with canon. Why didn't I just wait to catch up and then write this somewhere appropriate? Because I have had this concept burning in my brain for months and I can't wait any longer, y'all can deal with a little timeline wonkiness.
EDIT 4/10: Hey, I finished Oathbringer! In addition to continuing this fic, I have gone through and done some light editing to make sure it fits canon a little better. I didn't need to, but I absolutely needed to someone please send me help
"So...do they not know that we know they're fucking?"
-Urithiru gossip
No matter how much time Kaladin spent in Urithiru, it didn't get any more familiar to him.
Though watching his squires and Radiants, once ordinary soldiers under his command, attempting to master their new Lashing abilities in the area just outside the tower was at least good for entertainment.
A few were making progress. Rock was quite good at switching perspectives, and Teft moved far more spriley than one would expect for someone his age. The Lopen was the most at home with the new powers, and Kaladin wouldn't be surprised if the Herdazian was the first besides him in the order to swear the Third Ideal.
The rest, to put it kindly, were learning as quickly as chulls. It certainly was a good thing they could heal themselves with Stormlight, otherwise half his squires would be in the infirmary for weeks after some of the falls they'd taken.
"He's baaaaack," Syl taunted mischievously, twirling through the air around Kaladin's head.
He didn't have to ask who she meant. A still largely unfamiliar feeling welling up inside his chest, Kaladin turned to look anyway, and watched as Adolin came strolling up. "Morning, Radiant Bridgeboy," he practically sang, holding out a plate of food while carrying a bag under one arm.
The nickname used to make Kaladin bristle with annoyance, now it just made him squirm. "Good morning." He didn't dare try to attach a title to the greeting, or Heralds help him, a name. Kaladin wasn't sure he could call Adolin anything without fondness creeping into his normally dour tone. Kaladin focused on the food. "What's this for?"
He regretted the words the second they'd left his mouth. With a grin that made Kaladin's heart skip a beat, Adolin joked, "Eating, I imagine." He pushed it out further towards Kaladin, forcing the Windrunner to take it to avoid looking like a sullen child. "I imagine you haven't been doing very much of that, since you've been here all morning."
He wasn't wrong.
The food wasn't great, in fact it was as bland as most meals in Urithiru had been, but Kaladin could eat nearly anything if it kept him alive.
After a few bites, he struggled to get the words, "Thank you," out, before returning to the task, still keeping one eye on his squires. A quick motion caught his eye, and Kaladin almost choked on his food as he shouted, "Will someone please catch Sigzil?! We don't want to waste Stormlight healing him!"
Sure enough, someone was able to rescue the falling Worldsinger, and Kaladin was able to get back to eating while looking at his beautiful boyfriend. Boyfriend. The word felt odd, even to think. It wasn't as if Kaladin had never been attracted to a man before Adolin, he'd just...never done anything about it before.
Then along came this lighteyed pretty boy, who infuriated Kaladin from the moment they first met, who slowly wormed his way into being Kaladin's closest friend, who suddenly asked if Kaladin would be interested in joining his relationship with Shallan.
Kaladin blinked. He'd been thinking while eating, and now Adolin was grinning at him. Had he asked a question, and not gotten a response? "If I didn't know any better, I'd think you're infatuated with me," Adolin teased. Kaladin rolled his eyes, not showing how the words had awoken a strange nervous energy in him. From the bag, Adolin reached out and handed Kaladin a glowing money-purse. "We just got a fresh shipment of infused spheres, and I thought you could use them."
What was Kaladin supposed to say to that?
While he was searching for a possible response, Adolin brought out more things: rolls of clean bandages and a bottle of lister's oil. "I know you and your squires can heal, but..." He paused, just as the sound of someone slamming harshly into the wall of the tower filled the air. "...I thought you could use it, regardless."
This wasn't fair.
More than that, he was still struggling to wrap his head around this event. Adolin had just...come by. With everything Kaladin might need. It felt...not wrong exactly, but completely foreign.
Of course, Kaladin should have guessed this would happen. The man's unyielding compassion was perhaps his most prominent trait. Well, that or how he looked shirtless.
Though he looked wonderful in a shirt, as well. The lighteyed noble had even found a way to make the uniform of his station look stylish, making Kaladin think that if someone forced Adolin to put on a cloth sack he could still wear it well.
Once again, Kaladin realized he hadn't said anything. He was just holding an almost empty plate of food, a bag of spheres, and medical supplies, while staring intently at Adolin. "What can I say to this?" he whispered under his breath.
"First off, stop scowling at him!" Syl laughed. "Thank him again! Or tell him how good he looks today, I've seen courting humans do that before. Or...what was it you called him last night, in his room? 'The sexiest man I've ever seen'? He seemed to like it then, say it again!"
The honorspren was filling Kaladin's head with suggestions that made him blush deeper and deeper the more he listened to them. "Thanks, again," is all Kaladin managed to get out at first. "You look...good. Today." Adolin preened a little at the compliment, and Kaladin wished he could hate him for that. "I should get back to Bridge Four. Good day, Brightlord." And with that Kaladin turned around and walked over to his squires, some of whom were looking over at their old Bridge Leader.
They couldn't know. There was no way anyone knew, right?
"Listen, I don't have a problem with it, you don't have a problem with it, I don't get why they're hiding it. It wouldn't even be annoying, if they weren't so storming terrible at flirting."
-Urithiru gossip
It was strange how quickly relationships could change.
For so long, an odd tension had brewed between Shallan and Kaladin. Whenever the two Radiants were alone for too long, they both started thinking of the other in...ways that didn't befit their stations.
Or at least, Shallan had hoped it wasn't just her having those thoughts.
And the less that was said about Veil's thoughts on the ex-slave, the better.
There was no way Adolin could politely ignore the issue forever, and it wasn't really a surprise when one day he brought it up to the two of them.
What was a surprise was that he suggested Kaladin could simply be a part of their relationship.
Shallan had read of polyamory before, though it was largely a practice condemned by Vorinism. Of course, Radiants were as well, and there they were sucking in Stormlight and performing wonders in defiance of the Ardents' teachings.
The fact that Adolin would be okay 'sharing' Shallan with Kaladin was one thing to suddenly wrap her head around. The fact that he wanted to be with the Windrunner too was something else.
How exactly Shallan, a disaster of a bisexual herself, had missed both her dear friend and her fiance's similar sexualites, she did not know.
It had worked splendidly thus far, there was no denying that.
As Shallan waited for Kaladin to arrive for a private lunch together, one Adolin would have to miss due to his duties, she enjoyed reflecting on their relationship as she sketched out a Memory from the night before.
Kaladin and Adolin, their clothes disheveled, their faces pressed together as they kissed with wild abandon. In the moment of drawing it, Shallan's mind was wholly preoccupied with reproducing the image, but once it was done, she was left to blush at what she had drawn.
"A truth...a hidden truth?" Pattern wondered from the wall nearby, as he inspected the art.
Her eyes darted around the empty room, as though scared someone may see. "Yes," she said. "I plan to let Kaladin see it, then burn it."
From what Shallan could understand, what they were doing was not exactly uncommon. Relationships outside of marriage weren't formally recognized among the highborn, but they happened nonetheless, including the addition of new people into the partnership. So long as they didn't openly flaunt it, they should be fine.
Still, this went further than that. They didn't want anyone to know about their sordid affair. Well, that wasn't the right word, it wasn't really an 'affair'...after all Kaladin was just...with them. He fell into place among the two of them as naturally as if he was always meant to be there.
A sudden knocking on her door broke Shallan's focus, and she shouted, "Come in." She was decent, after all. Safehand covered with a long sleeve, and otherwise wearing a modest, if quite casual, outfit.
The man she'd been waiting for came in, his handsome face drawn and tired, and his uniform as windswept as his hair. "Apologies, Brightness, but the squires needed some demonstrations."
Shallan rolled her eyes at the title. "You know, it's quite unfair that your order has so many squires. You're hogging all the potential Radiants." She could tell Kaladin was biting his tongue, and sighed. "Go ahead, Kaladin, say it. We both know I've said worse."
"Well, Shallan, in order to have more squires, you need to spend time with other people."
Shallan inclined her head a little at the comment, an acknowledgement of the jab.
"Adolin and I are together all the time, perhaps he could be a Lightweaver squire," she wondered aloud, half-seriously.
More mirth than was usual in his voice, Kaladin replied, "I tend to spend time with him as well, in case you've forgotten."
Shallan passed him the sketch, and savored the sight of Kaladin looking skittish at the recreation of the night before on paper. "Perhaps it can be a contest? We'll see if he blunders into Shadesmar or runs up a wall first. Winner gets an entire week with him, alone."
It was a simple jest, yet the look it brought out in their eyes was anything but simple.
Surely because they both had Adolin on their minds.
"Speaking of Adolin," Kaladin said, weariness creeping back into his tone as he leaned back on his heels. "I still don't know what to make of what he was doing this morning."
Shallan had a feeling she already knew what this was about, but nonetheless she played innocent. "Yes?"
Clearly telling this story was a bit embarrassing for Kaladin, though Shallan thought it was odd they both still struggled with that social moray. After all the things they'd seen each other do, on the battlefield and in the bedroom, how could such ridiculous feelings come into play over something so small? "He...brought me food. And spheres. And medical supplies."
It was as Shallan expected. "You didn't ask?" Kaladin nodded. "It's as though he sees relationships as a competition, and he wouldn't be an Alethi if he wasn't trying to win." She proposed the notion without any malice. In fact, it was part of what she liked about Adolin so much. "Welcome to being courted by him. If I learn how to get used to it, I'll let you know."
He only smiled at that, but a smile from Kaladin was worth a rolling laugh from most people.
Shallan looked around, realizing something was missing. "Where is Syl?" The spren, who still didn't entirely trust Shallan, usually appeared in their private meetings, in the same way Pattern was present even with Kaladin in the room.
Kaladin narrowed his eyes. "She's...still outside. Sulking." Realizing he had to elaborate, Kaladin clarified, "Pattern said something that upset her."
That wasn't particularly surprising. The Cryptics and the Honorspren, apparently, might as well have been the Emuli and Tukari of the Cognitive Realm. On the whole, Pattern and Syl were exceptions to that rule, but that didn't stop events like this from occurring every so often.
Both humans in the room looked to the wall for an answer. "I did not intend that. Mmm. Merely asked why she chose that lie for a form. Mmm." That would do it, Shallan thought. As could be expected by their name, honorspren tended to dislike being labeled as liars.
Looking around the room, Kaladin seemed to realize something. "Where," he wondered, "is the food?"
"Weren't you bringing it?" But even as she asked the question, Shallan realized they never said who would actually be supplying lunch. Usually, it was just something Adolin did when they all ate together. He knew what they both liked by that point, after all.
Recognizing the mistake, neither laughed, but they weren't upset either. "I'm not too hungry, are you?" Kaladin asked, for which he received a shake of the head. They settled into a more normal conversation from there.
Or at least, as normal as conversations between them could get.
The tension that had caused Kaladin to enter their relationship had long since disappeared. They could be comfortable around each other.
There was romance between them, that couldn't be denied, and there was attraction. But more often that not, their focus was on the third member of their partnership, even when he wasn't around.
"My congratulations to the happy throuple! I always thought it would be at least a two-person job to satisfy that Kholin."
-Wit
It had been a very, very long day.
Well, considering the situation they were all in, most days felt that way.
Nonetheless, Adolin was able to find some measure of peace, which wasn't something everyone could say.
He lay in the middle of his bed, still a rarity in Urithiru, feeling like the luckiest man in Roshar.
To his left was Kaladin, stripped down to his bedclothes. When they'd first laid down for sleep, the Windrunner had turned away from the others, leaving Adolin to put one hand on the small of his back.
But not long after falling asleep, which the young man did quite quickly, he'd turned back to face Adolin and cuddled up against him. He was so withdrawn while awake, even when they made love. Every time Adolin or Shallan reached out to touch him, there was a moment where he pulled away, before he made himself accept the affection.
It made for a beautiful contrast to those rare moments where Kaladin seemed to just need Adolin. He still felt as though he knew less than a tenth of the hardships Kaladin had gone through, but being able to comfort him, to ease those burdens for any length of time, felt like a wonderful accomplishment to Adolin.
To his right was Shallan, wearing the same clothes she'd had on most of the day. Whatever secret things she enjoyed doing when Veil was in control, she'd found another free night to spend with him, and he was grateful.
It was only really while sleeping that he got to see Shallan completely unguarded. Her red hair splayed out, mouth agape as she snored, and an arm possessively clutching Adolin's torso. So much of the time, Shallan had to think so carefully about anything she said or did.
She thought that Adolin didn't notice, that his generally slower wit meant he wouldn't realize that she felt an almost compulsive need to hide some of her from him. But there, in the bed, she could drop all of that, if only for a few hours.
Her freehand touched one of Kaladin's in the middle of Adolin's chest, and he almost laughed at the sight. Even when they slept, they came together over him.
Adolin knew that for them, what they were doing together felt something like madness. They'd shared such thoughts with him, more than once. Adolin would always laugh, make a joke about how the world was so mad already, one more act of insanity wouldn't make a difference.
But the strange thing was, it never felt mad to Adolin.
Intellectually, he knew most in Urithiru would have Thoughts about it, should word get out. If it hadn't already. But Adolin couldn't find the energy to care. He was coming to love them, both of them, and with all these two broken souls had experienced, Adolin was eager to do all he could for them.
If anyone took a real issue with it, Adolin could handle it.
The Desolation had come. They had to take their happiness where they could find it.