Chapter 1- How it all started
WARNING: THIS STORY CONTAINS SENSITIVE TOPICS SUCH AS EATING DISORDERS AND BULLIMIA, PLEASE DO NOT READ IF THIS MAY TRIGGER YOU IN ANY WAY
Btw, this story's name (When I Look at You) is inspired by Miley Cyrus' song and I strongly advise you to listen to it while reading this story as it fits perfectly – you don't have to of course
FOR ALL OF YOU WATERLOOD ROAD FANS OUT THERE 3
My name is Lauren Andrews and I'm 14 years old, I'm in Year 10 at Waterloo Road school. My best friends are Sambuca Kelly and Josh Stevenson, I'm good friends with Finn Sharkey and Amy as well.
I've always been insecure about my appearance from a very young age. When I was 5, I used to feel self conscious wearing a swimming costume for my lessons and I felt a lot bigger in size compared to the other girls. At the age of 10, I used to look at my reflection in the mirror everyday and feel so ashamed of the way I looked. I used to wonder why I didn't look as skinny or as pretty as the other girls, I always felt bad about myself and would never wear anything too tight or revealing in the fear that other people would think I looked 'chubby'.
I never thought about it too much though, avoiding any pictures being taken of me so I didn't have to look at myself and see just how ugly I really was. It didn't help that my best friend for 8 years, Sambuca or 'Sam' was petite and blonde, she always looked better than me no matter how hard I tried to look good.
My mom would always say I was beautiful just the way I was but I never really believed her. My brother, Shane, used to tease me about being ugly and he called me 'Large Lauren' and laugh at me with his friends but as he grew older, he stopped and became nicer towards me. I can still hear his cruel words whenever I see him though and can't get them out of my head: 'roly poly Lauren', 'why does Lauren look so fat today?, 'why does Lauren eat so much?, 'Lauren's such a greedy pig, no one will ever like her'.
I know its stupid and that he didn't actually mean what he said, he was only 9 for gods sake and was just trying to make me cry, like all annoying big brothers do. I shouldn't have ever believed him, but I couldn't help but agreeing with everything he said, I felt like I was fat and needed to lose weight, even though everyone else said I was an average size for my age and healthy.
"LAUREN ANDREWS, GET DOWN HERE RIGHT NOW! YOU'RE GOING TO BE LATE FOR SCHOOL IF YOU DON'T HURRY UP!" my Mom shouts from downstairs.
"Coming" I answer, sighing.
We've got PE at school today and I hate football, I can't kick the ball and everyone just moans at me. At least Sam will be there to make me laugh and I'll see Josh in lessons so we can mess around like normal.
I hurriedly tie my dark brown, curly hair into a messy topknot and shove my school shoes on before taking a banana from the side and leaving for school. I walk with Sam and we see Josh and Tom (Mr Clarkson) on the way.
"Good Morning, Lauren and Sambuca," he says smiling.
"Good Morning, Mr Clarkson" we answer, smiling back.
Josh just rolls his eyes and slams the car door shut before jogging over to us, brushing his curly hair out of his eyes.
"Hey Lauren" he says, giving me a wide grin.
"Hey" I say.
"Sam" he says, greeting her too.
Sam frowns at him, annoyed he only said hi to me at first.
"Come on, Lauren", she says, grabbing my arm and walking into school.
"See you later' I mouth at him before being dragged away by Sam.
We have PE first period so we get changed and go to the astro turf, passing the boys on the way. Josh waves at me, before being hit with a ball by Finn, me and Sam laugh and start warming up.
After PE is over, it's lunch time and we queue up for our food, Finn and Josh infront of us. Me and Sam are chatting non-stop about whether we're Team Edward or Team Jacob from the Twilight Saga and so we don't notice when we almost walk straight into Josh and Finn who have already got their lunch.
"Whoops, I'm sorry" I say, turning to look at Finn who looks annoyed.
"Watch where you're going, fat ass" Finn laughs, amused at his own joke.
"Finn!" Sam says, shocked at how Finn could say something so cruel.
"What? It's not like she doesn't know it already" he says, still laughing.
"Know what?" I say, annoyed.
"Come on Lauren, that's go, he's not worth it" Sam says, steering me away from the two boys who are still laughing.
"No, I wanna know what they mean", I turn back round and walk up to them.
"What do you mean 'it's not like she doesn't know it already?' What don't I know?"
"Well, you're not exactly on the small side are you?" he questions, waiting for my reaction.
"What is that supposed to mean?" I say with a sinking feeling in my stomach.
"It means you're well… big built" he answers, wickedly.
"Are you saying I'm fat?" I demand, mortified.
"Yeah, I suppose"
"Lauren, come on now, I think we've heard enough" she retorts at Finn.
"No, one second…" I say, desperate to know something.
"Do you think I'm fat, Josh?" I say, glancing at my best friend (and crush) nervously.
"Ermm…"
Josh looks over at Finn who urges him to say yes.
"Yeah," Josh answers, shuffling his feet awkwardly.
Finn laughs cruelly at me and Josh nudges him to shut up.
"Fine", I say indignantly, feeling the need to cry of humiliation.
They go away to find a table and me and Sam wait in the queue as we did before. When it's my turn to order though, I look at the food in disgust and decide not to get anything after what Finn and Josh had said.
'Maybe they were right', I think sadly. I feel bad for not eating, but then I think it's not like I'm going to lose too much weight from skipping one meal, I'm fat enough as it is.
Sam orders chicken nuggets and chips with a drink, and we sit down at the table opposite Josh and Finn.
Sam looks at my non-existing plate and frowns suspiciously.
"Did what Finn and Josh say bother you?" she asks.
"No, of course not", I say lying.
"How come you aren't having something to eat then?" she says, pointedly.
"Ummm.. I'm just not hungry," I say.
"Ok, well just ignore Josh and Finn anyway, they're both pathetic idiots" she says, biting into her lunch.
"Yeah.." I say, distractedly.
Sam looks over at me, confused.
"Are you sure you're ok?" she asks.
"Yeah, I'm fine." I say, lying for the second time that day.
"In fact, I'm going to go and help Mr Mead set up for Chemistry, see you in class."
"Bye" she says, already thinking about something else.
I get up and walk out of the cafeteria, not noticing Josh's worried glance and Finn's apologetic one.
To Be Continued..
Ok, so I know that this story idea has been done before, but I made it my own and I've got different ideas for this story. I hope you enjoyed the first chapter, I know that eating disorders are a very serious subject, and I'm not making fun of it in anyway, I'm just spreading more awareness in a waterloo road themed fanfic about my favourite character. Please review
Also, I am not saying that Lauren (Darcy Isa) is fat in any way. She is my absolute favourite character from WRL and is gorgeous (I especially love her beautiful curly hair). I am just telling you how she feels about herself in this story, just in case any of you took offence.
Also, I am taking suggestions for this story if any of you have an idea of what should happen next that you'd like to share 3