To Naya with love. Thank you.
I used to think that the word 'crush' was only applicable when you're in Elementary school, or Junior High, or whatever it is you do when your boobs were just like… 2 mosquito bites. I mean, I remember telling my mom that I had a crush on this boy Mikey who used to save me a seat every morning on the school bus – that is until I found out that he was only doing that because he didn't want this other boy, Finn, who was always super gassy in the morning to sit next to him. And it just so happened that Finn was actually a gentleman who always let me get on the bus first – I kinda felt bad for him now.
I never thought that now, at 26, I'd still have a crush on this woman next to me. I never thought that after all these years of guys – and girls – practically throwing themselves at me, I'd be the one who's willing to hide in this woman's dryer and handpick the lint off her clothing just to get her coming to work earlier.
What, too weird?
Well, I am weird. And I'm proud of it. In fact, I'm super proud of it because that very quality is what got me here – exactly where I wanted to be in life.
My name is Brittany S. Pierce, and I'm the founder of Qwerkin. Y'know, the mega company that incubates really quirky ideas and sell really quirky, but functional, working inventions? Yep, that Qwerkin – and I take full credit of the super awesome name, by the way. Quirks that werk, thank you very much.
Anyway. My name is Brittany S. Pierce, the founder of Qwerkin, and I'm hopelessly crushing on one of my employees, Santana Lopez.
The problem is not because I banned office romance or anything like that at Qwerkin. Don't get me wrong… I appreciate professionalism above anything, but I fully support my employees looking for love. I mean, lord knows I've been to a few Qwerkin weddings myself. Besides, there's also a clause in Qwerkin's contract that if their intra-office relationships bring drama into the workplace, then both parties are going to have to leave their position. So far, the clause has been very handy in controlling lusts and libidos.
The real problem… is actually me. And my current face. And my current hair. And my current comfortable shoes. And my current blue eyes that are wearing contacts so hazel, even I don't recognize myself every morning looking in the mirror.
It'd be fun, I said. It'd be cool, I said. I get to play dress up everyday, I said.
Blurgh.
Note to self: when you have a seemingly awesome idea, run it through 10 of your most trust-worthy friends instead of thinking you can pull it off with no problem.