As a child, I have always been alone. Not physically of course. I always had people helping assisting me, ever since I was a child, ever since I could move around on my own. I was never alone.
Although on the inside, I always felt lonely. The other kids would stay far away from me, far far away. As if there was an invisible barrier keeping them away from me. I always wondered if it was the strange buzzing surrounding me, or the fact that I was blind.
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I sat in the grass seiza style. My hands curled up in my lap. I heard my dad sit right in front of me. Placing a few jars in front of. His voice was soft and gentle, "alright, Hotaru, do you know what day it is?" He asked.
"No.." I responded softly. I heard soft buzzing coming from papa. Not like the regular buzzing, but several different hums.
"Well, today is your birthday, May 5th," he started. "Whenever someone in our clan turns 3 years old, we test to see if they developed our kekkei genkai," he explained. "You know those chakra exercises we've been practicing?"
"Yeah.." I responded, automatically pushing my chakra into my hand, humming slightly as I feel my chakra pulsing through my body like blood.
Papa placed a jar right in front of me in the grass. I could hear all of the tiny little whispers of the bugs in the jar through the thin glass. "Alright, Hotaru-chan, what I want you to do, is push chakra into your hands and hover your hand above the jar, alright? It is right in front of you." He explained gently.
I raised my hand above the jar carefully, as I did so I felt all of the tiny presences of the insects within, their tiny voices talking amongst themselves in mumbled whispers. They didn't really seem to care for my presence, and I wasn't exactly too interested either.
I pulled my hand away, and looked back up towards my papa, "so, Hotaru-chan, did anything special happen?" He asked.
"No, they were like the spiders, just talking to themselves," I explained softly, looking back towards the ground.
"That's how most describe them," he chuckled. "Although don't worry, not a lot in our clan can control them, they're called the Rinkaichu," he explained gently.
He placed another jar right in front of me, in a careful movement I place my hand above the jar, it was wider, flatter, more like upperwarte than a jar. All of the little worms were gathered at the bottom in the soil . Feeling their presence with my chakra. The insects spoke in sync, like the ants, they all chanted in tiny little voices, "queen! Queen!"
I looked up, and I heard my father being to speak, "Anything new here?"
I shrugged, "no, papa, all they're saying is 'Queen', like the ants," I explained softly.
Papa was quiet for a moment, "you know, Hota-chan, you're able to understand bugs quite well for your age," he commented, before moving on. "While, you are correct, I didn't see any sort of other reaction from the Shokaichu," he explained.
I heard him pull the jar away, and move another into it's place. These ones were rather quiet, I could barely hear their tiny voice under the beating of their wings. All I could hear was the faint murmuring about food.
"All they're talking about is food," I explained softly, pulling my hand away and placing it into my lap. "What if I don't have a kekkai genaki?" I asked in a soft voice.
"Well I definately think that you do, Hota-chan, but we just have to go through all of the bugs," he explained gently. "With the way you're able to communicate with them, I truly think you have it. I myself don't have it, but I have bonded with these insects, the Kochu, although I am not a hive for them," he explained.
"Okay, papa.." I responded softly, as another jar is placed in front of me. Placing my hand above the jar, I heard their voices clearly reach out to me. They buzzed loudly and like the Shokaichu, spoke of a queen, but it was less of a chanting but more of a saying of the word 'queen' in quick rapid, and random succession.
They were like the bees. Although I haven't handled bees too much, as we allowed the Kamizuru clan to be the main producer of honeybees. "They're like the bees," I stated softly, pulling my hand away.
I heard papa hum slightly, "yes, most would say that. This is the main insect of our clan, the kikaichu." He explained. "That leaves only one kind of bug, the Kidaichu," he explained. He placed one last jar in front of me, and as I hovered my hand above the glass, I heard the quite clearly, and they seemed quite hungry.
I felt an immediate reaction, I heard their bodies bump against the glass to get closer to my hand.
I heard papa sigh out softly, "it seems the Kidaichu quite like you," he chuckled. "I will open the jar, but before I open it, I want you to spread your chakra across your body in a thin layer, alright?" He explained.
"o-okay.." I let out a soft stutter as I nodded, pushing my chakra out of my body a bit.
"Now, this will probably feel a bit weird, alright, but I just need you to relax for me, alright, Hota-chan?" Papa explained, and I took a deep breath and let my muscles relax, but my heart still thrummed in my chest nervously. What if it hurt? Or I had a bad reaction..?
I heard the gently squeak of the lid coming off of the jar, and I took a deep breath through my mouth, and one of the Kidaichu flew right in.
I froze slightly, I felt it buzzing around inside me. It felt so weird. I felt a thrumming through my chakra and I felt small tingling sensations as I felt more buzzing along the insides of my arms, abdomen, neck, and legs.
I heard papa chuckle slightly. "Alright, Hota-chan. It seems like you have our kekkai genkai. Now, I am going to put the rest of these back, but what I want you to do for right now, is mediate, and get used to them, okay? I know it will be hard to get used to, but this is why we're doing this now, alright?" He explained as I heard him stand up, and I took a deep breath.
I've been around insects my whole life. I'd listen as they talked to me, whenever I watered our garden, listen to the murming spiders in the corner of my room at night whenever I tried to sleep.
When weeding the garden I'd hear the worms under the ground, murming to themselves.
I took in a deep breath, and focused on my insides, and I thought to myself. Papa told me that if I have the clan's kekkai genkai that I'd have to eat a lot more, because my metabolism would spike. I felt the constant tingling and buzzing within my body.
I felt lighter in a way, like I could just float away. I also felt heavier, and even more tired. Papa said that if I have the kekkei genkai that the bugs would eat my chakra, and dead cells, and make a hive in my body.
It seemed really scary.. But in a way it was calming as well! Because I knew that that the kidaihcu would protect me!
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I sat at the low dinner table, with my hands wrapped around the warm teacup in front of me, not letting go in fear of forgetting where I last put it. I looked up, staring at elder Himoka. Her voice was soft and gentle. "You are quite mature for your age, did you know that, Hotaru-chan?" She asked.
"Mama always said that I was quiet," I responded shyly. I could hear the soft wiggling sounds of the worms in elder Himoka. Their soft chanting barely noticeable above the buzzing of my Kidaichu.
I heard papa place down a bowl of ramen in front of each of us, before sitting adjacent to me, on the right.
"Alright, well Hotaru-chan. I assume you know what I'm here for?" She asked.
"N-no.. Not really.." I responded softly, as I let my ramen cool down. It was high in calories so it was a common food at our house.
I heard elder Himoka shuffle around slightly as she sipped at her black tea. "Well, I am here to talk to you about your disability. Your blindness," she explained. I stayed quiet and allowed her to speak.
"Now, first of all, I would like to say, that you have a very low chance at becoming a shinobi. It is possible, but it will be much harder for you," she explained. "Are you interested in becoming a shinobi, Hotaru-chan?" She asked.
"Well.. Umm.. I haven't really thought about it before.." I responded softly.
"Well, since you have our kekkei genkai you will be very useful out on the field, it's a shame you're blind," she stated, in an almost sour tone, I heard papa shift uncomfortably next to me.
"Because you certainly seem like a gifted child, you speak quite fluently for your age, a shame to have your talents wasted," she drawled on. She went quiet for a moment. "But, cases have occurred where there have been blind folk born to the Aburame clan. Although, you are the first to develop our kekkei genkai, which will make it much easier to proceed with your training," she explained.
"We will give you some basic training, so that you can live with your blindness, by having your Kidaichu guide you, but near the end of it, you will decide if you wish to become a shinobi," she explained, I heard her take a sip of her tea.
"If you decide not to become a shinobi, there will be limited options for you to take as a profession, you could become a gardener, a caretaker and breeder of kidaichu, or even volunteer at the hospital to research more into our kekkei genkai," she explained.
I heard papa clear his throat, a sign he was about to say something, "well, how about we enjoy our meal first? Then I will talk to Hota-chan tonight?"
"That sounds perfectly fine to me, now, thank you for the meal, Kotun-kun," she stated before picking up her chopsticks and eating. I took a sip of my tea. I felt hungry, but I didn't feel like eating at the moment.
"Hotaru-chan, start eating or else your food will get cold," Himoka-sama stated in an almost demanding tone.
I heard papa shift near me, as he began eating. I sighed out slightly before picking up my chop-sticks and uttering a soft "itadakimasu", and then eating.
Why did I have to be blind?