Author's Note: Oh look, it's me again. Starting a new fic. I love Xander and Sarah and I wanted to give them a story of their own. I also started plotting this in the summer so any similarities to other plots is merely coincidental. Besides, it's a soap opera - there are tropes that are timeless in the drama and I think I am hitting on a few. Hopefully you will enjoy my little tale and if you do, please let me know!

Part One

For a moment, she doesn't feel like she is looking at herself.

Sarah Horton tilts her head a little, a hand smoothing down over the textured fabric of her midsection. The woman looking back at her does the same, exuding an air of sophistication that is rare for someone who spends so much time in scrubs. Finally, as her mother gasps behind her, the image becomes clear.

This is her wedding day.

Her head turns over her shoulder to find Maggie Kiriakis standing in the doorway. Her mother's hand has gone to cover her mouth and there are tears in her eyes. Sarah makes a face, her nose wrinkling. "Already?"

"Oh Sarah, you look beautiful…" Maggie breathes, coming further into the room. She closes the door behind her, no doubt to prevent anyone else from taking a peak at the bride before she makes her glorious debut.

Now Sarah looks back to the mirror to take herself in once again. She had said the words 'Old Hollywood' when she first stepped into the gown shop and she thinks she has managed to pull it off. The fabric hugs her curves before spilling out around her feet. Her curls, usually a wild mess depending on what time of day it is, are softer now, pinned down by a birdcage veil. She once again presses a hand to her against her dress. "You really think so?" she asks, as if she needs to hear it one more time.

"I think Xander would marry you in a burlap sack but yes, my darling, you are going to be the perfect bride," Maggie says with a laugh. She comes forward to place her hands on her daughter's bare shoulders. Their eyes meet in the mirror. "It's finally here. Your wedding…"

Despite that being very much obvious given her state of dress, Sarah's stomach curls just a little, as if she is struggling to wrap her head around the idea. She has planned for this day for months, not overlooking a single detail and yet now that it has finally come, it doesn't quite feel like it.

There is real fear coiling inside of her and she wonders if it is getting ready to spring forth into something she can't control.

Maggie's fingers tighten on her shoulders and she wonders if her face is telling. She tries to relax her mouth but in the end, a mother knows her daughter. "Is everything alright, Sarah?"

She finally turns away from the perfect image of herself to face her mother properly. "Yes, of course…" she says quickly. Too quickly. She takes a deep breath, letting her eyes close and then tries again. "Pre-wedding jitters, Mom. That's it."

Maggie lets the answer settle between them and Sarah wonders if she is trying to determine the validity of it. "That's normal," she finally says. She reaches for Sarah's hands and gives them a squeeze. "But I promise you, as soon as you see Xander standing there waiting for you, everything will fall into place. You'll be too busy thinking about how much you love him to consider anything else."

It is sound wisdom but Sarah can't help but doubt it.

This isn't the first time she has found herself in this exact position after all.

Sarah forces herself to smile (not too wide or else Maggie might question it). "Right, right. I wanted the whole bride experience - that includes the butterflies," she agrees and then quickly changes the subject before her declaration can be questioned. "How do things look?"

Maggie's entire face lights up again. "Everything looks amazing. The garden...the makeshift altar…" She lets go of her daughter's hands to press her own to her chest. "And of course the sun is out. You said it wouldn't dare rain on your wedding day."

Sarah manages a laugh. She had tackled the wedding preparation with the same amount of gusto she did everything else, barrelling ahead with bullheaded determination. Poor Xander had just held on for the ride but everything is playing out like it should.

(minus the bride's boiling nerves, of course)

"Can you go check on the photographer? I haven't had a chance to yet and now I am afraid if I go wandering around the mansion like this a certain someone might see me…" Sarah says and if Maggie catches on that she wants a few minutes alone, she doesn't let on.

Instead her mother nods and then begins to retreat. "I'll be back in ten minutes so I can walk you down the aisle," Maggie tells her and then gives Sarah one last smile before she disappears out the door.

Sarah stands in the middle of the room for a moment, and then turns back to the mirror once more. She shouldn't do it but she can't help but think of the wedding that was supposed to come before this one. She had stood just where she is now, looking at herself and bubbling over with happiness. There had not been even a hint of nerves then - she had never been so sure of what she was supposed to do.

And look how that had turned out.

That day she had lost her daughter and the man she loved. Everything that had held her heart together had been ripped from her - and worst of all, Xander had been the one responsible.

It has nearly been two years since that day but it still hurts.

Sarah has forgiven Xander; she truly has. But that doesn't erase the pain. She wishes it were that simple. That she can forget the love she had for a child that was not hers - even now, seeing Rachel causes something to catch in her. She knows that little girl is not hers and still, she feels a connection. That alone makes her feel guilty, as if she is betraying Mackenzie somehow. Her daughter (her real daughter) did not deserve to die the way she had and she certainly does not deserve to be forgotten. Only thinking of Mackenzie sometimes twists itself around to how everything had played out with Xander.

And now she can't help but let doubt creep in.

What if she goes downstairs, takes her mother's arm and has her world flipped upside down again? She had such faith in him on their first wedding day and she knows logically that he has changed in the ways that count to her. He loves her. She can feel it in every touch, see it in his eyes - he doesn't even have to say it. And she loves him too. She has never felt like this with anyone, no matter what she has told them. Xander is it for her.

But still, she can't seem to shake herself free of the shadows cast by what came before this day.

Now her dress feels too tight and the pins that hold her veil feel as if they are digging into her scalp. Logically, she knows this is panic and she can't give herself over to it (she needs to remind herself that she loves and is loved in return). Despite knowing that, she suddenly wants to be anywhere but where she is now.

So she turns and heads for the door.

X

Xander makes a face as Jack pulls on the knot of his tie, ensuring that is perfectly in place. They make a strange pair, he knows that. He is willing to bet that Jack is regularly questioned about their friendship and is glad that it has not deterred the older man yet. He would not want anyone but Jack standing next to him on this day.

"There," Jack says and takes a step back. "I think that is to the bride's specifications." Both men chuckle, no doubt thinking over the flurry of activity over the last week as the wedding day loomed.

"Sarah just wants things to go perfectly…"

Jack holds up his hands. "Listen, you don't have to explain it to me. I married a Horton woman myself. I know first hand what you are getting yourself into. Let me just say - it's worth it."

Xander doesn't need to be told this. He already knows. Sarah is worth everything. He doesn't care about how she had practically tangled him circles to ensure this wedding went off without a hitch. He doesn't even care about the wedding in general. Yes, he wants to call her his wife but they could have gotten married at the courthouse and he would be just as happy. But she is worth it. His smile says it all to Jack, who slaps a hand on his shoulder.

"All right," Jack announces. "I think I am supposed to direct you to the altar now."

Xander doesn't have to be told twice.

Two minutes later he is standing in the sprawling gardens of the Kiriakis estate, looking over a modest crowd of Salem's citizens. He knows very few are there for him and most that share his name are only here out of obligation. He doesn't care. He only waits to see Sarah appear on her mother's arm.

He doesn't even realize she is late until a murmur ripples through the crowd. His eyebrows come together and he glances towards Jack, who looks equally confused. Xander refuses to read into it. Sarah just needs an extra minute or two to ensure she looks perfect (impossible because Xander thinks she is at her most perfect when she begins to stir in his arms after a night's sleep).

That extra minute or two drags out. Becomes five, then ten.

Xander can't help but start to actually look at the people in the crowd. Most have their heads together, whispering theories on what is taking so long. But a few are staring straight at him, as if waiting for him to crack. He presses his mouth into a thin line when he notices the way Phillip has sprawled in his seat, a smirk creasing his lips.

For the first time, he feels genuinely nervous. Something is not right - a fact that is confirmed a moment later when Maggie appears. She is alone. Xander doesn't even think twice, he steps off the altar and moves down the aisle to meet her half way. His eyes search her face and even though he already has an inkling of the answer, he has to ask it. "Sarah?"

Maggie's mouth falls and she shakes her head. "I can't find her anywhere. Xander, she's gone."