Chapter One - Elsie
The day the Ostwick Circle fell was one that firmed up the mage rebellion. Known throughout Thedas as one of the more 'sedate' circles, Ostwick was known for generally good relations between mages and templars. Perhaps because the circle was rather inbred with many noble families having sons, daughters, brothers, sisters, cousins and the like as both mages and templars within the walls. My time there was much the same - my sister was a templar along with an uncle on my mother's side and I believe I had a few distant cousins scattered around too. I, like my fellow mages, was studious, well-behaved and cherished the circle as a place of learning and wisdom, and a refuge from my life before my magic quickened. It was not a place of confinement or punishment in my experience, and dare I say it, many who resided in the Ostwick Circle probably felt the same. Although we had little choice, I would say that most of us did want to be there and have fond memories of our lives behind its walls - until the circle fell, of course.
Extract from 'Torn Asunder', the memoirs of Inquisitor Elsie Trevelyan
When she woke up, she didn't know where she was.
Her eyes opened slowly and she reached out in the dark. Her fingers found silk sheets and warm blankets and she gazed up at a canopy above her; the Trevelyan family crest delicately weaved with gold thread in intricate patterns around stitched ivy and foliage.
Elsie Trevelyan sat up in the large four poster bed and realised that she was in her old room, from when she used to live in this house. It hadn't changed much since she had left almost fifteen years ago - her doll's house sat in the corner; one of the books she must've been reading still lay open on a chaise by one of the large windows overlooking the formal gardens. To the unassuming eye, one might've thought that someone had died, the way nothing had been touched. But Elsie bitterly thought that leaving it thus had probably made things easier for her parents to pretend that their eldest daughter and heir had died, to escape the truth that she had been sent to the Circle.
A soft knock on the chamber door pulled her out of her thoughts. She sat up in bed and croaked out an 'enter', her voice still husky from sleep.
The woman who walked in was taller than Elsie by a head and carried herself with elegance and grace, despite her height. Dark hair fell in tight ringlets down her back and her scarlet dress flowed around her as she strode over to Elsie's windows and pulled the curtains back.
Elsie blinked rapidly at the sudden light but the woman ignored her discomfort and came to stand on the other side of the bed.
"You can't stay in here all day, you know," she said in her clipped voice; her perfectly shaped eyebrows raised. "It's almost noon."
Elsie shook her head. "You know me Etta - I've never been a morning person."
Her sister, Lucetta crossed her arms and despite her perfect appearance and her feigned annoyance she couldn't help but smile, and Elsie offered the same in return
She sat down on the edge of the bed, smoothing her skirts out. "I didn't even know you were coming," she said, reaching to take Elsie's hand. They had been close sisters once, with all but a year between them in age, and Lucetta's sudden familiarity surprised Elsie, but she did not pull her hand away.
"I arrived in the early hours, before dawn,'' she replied, offering her sister a sympathetic smile. "It's become a habit, moving under the cover of darkness as a fugitive."
Her face darkened. "Even though you've done nothing wrong," she said.
Elsie shrugged. "According to the Chantry, all mages are now apostates. I do what I must to survive."
Lucetta's shoulders sagged. "I know that. Look, Evie will be arriving this afternoon... will things be alright?" she asked tentatively.
Ah yes, Evie, their younger sister. Elsie nodded slowly. "I'll be on my best behaviour, I swear."
Lucetta squeezed Elsie's hand. "Thank you. You know it means so much to us all if you two get along."
"We always used to, before I went to the Circle," Elsie reminded her. "The four of us were all so close."
"I remember," she said softly, getting up to stand by the window. "It seems only last week that I was sobbing in mother's arms when you were taken away. And it feels like yesterday when Evie left to join the Templars."
There was a pause before Elsie said softly, "You know it wasn't my choice to leave."
Lucetta nodded, her ringlets bouncing. "I know. Sometimes I can't help but wonder if you hadn't been sent to the Circle, and stayed as heir apparent?"
Elsie looked away. As the eldest of all of Bann Trevelyan's children, she was always set to inherit. Indeed, all of her childhood had drilled that undisputed fact into her head. No expense was spared - she learnt to fight with training swords, speak eloquently and had even sat in on meetings their father had with visiting nobility, so she could learn Ostwick politics. It wasn't fun in the slightest, but Elsie honestly thought at the time that it was where the Maker wanted her. So she was studious and complied. And was rather good at it.
But then her magic had quickened, on the same day as her first moon's blood. Elsie remembered running to the training yard, battling a straw dummy with her blunt sword, when she accidentally set the dummy on fire. By the end of the next day, she was in the Circle.
"The Maker works in strange ways," Elsie said eventually, looking back at her tall sister. Upon Elsie's leaving, Lucetta had assumed the role as heir, and taken to the position in a better way than any of them ever could have imagined. She looked more like their father with her long face so there was no doubt who her predecessor was.
Lucetta smiled. "Indeed He does." She turned to leave, pausing at the door. "Come now; lunch will be served shortly and Cecelia is dying to see you."
Elsie grinned at the prospect of seeing their youngest sister, who she absolutely doted upon, as did all of them. As Lucetta left, Elsie stretched luxuriously: she couldn't remember the last time she woke up in a feather bed - not since before the war broke out, anyway. And the ones in the Circle were nowhere near as comfortable.
Reluctantly she pulled herself out of bed. Her bare feet relished the softness of the thick Antivan rugs as she headed over to the privy, warming the pitcher of water with a touch of her hand, barely using a wisp of magic. She splashed it over her face and neck before dabbing her skin dry with a soft cloth that smelt faintly of lavender. Before the looking glass, a woman peered back at her who she hardly recognised - it had been many months since she had seen her appearance, with personal vanities a luxury of the past. Misty grey eyes stare back; ones that look older than their twenty seven years. Her tanned skin and chestnut hair had seen better days - her cheeks which were once full and rosy were now gaunt and herlong hair was flat and lifeless, when it used to be soft and voluptuous. On her right cheek, she traced the burn scar with a finger, but it was numb under her touch. An ugly thing, to be sure, but she was grateful her injury from the war was nothing worse.
When she stepped back into my chamber, the bed had been made and a fire recently lit. On the bed was a dark green dress, cut in the Ostwick style with a low curved neckline and long light skirts. She hesitated before running the material lightly through her fingers, the fabric so light it slid like water. A dress for a lady to wear, not an apostate, disowned by her family. Elsie turned away and spotted her pack in the corner of the room. Within moments she had found her old robes from the Circle - the faded red and gold of an Enchanter's robe. It had seen better days and was rough around the edges, but after fifteen years of being informed that she was not Lady Trevelyan anymore, why should that change? Indeed, before the Circles fell, she had begun to carve her life out at the Circle as a teacher. Perhaps she could've become the First Enchanter...
Elsie shook her head; there was little point thinking on what could have been. Everything changed in Kirkwall, and despite being the neighbouring Circle, it took a long time for the chaos to reach them. So she pushed aside all remorse, smoothed down her robes and pulled her long hair back into a simple ponytail.
The corridors and hallways of the house were a maze, and she could only just about remember how to find the drawing room. Her route took her through the entrance hall, where on the landing by the large sweeping staircase, sat a gigantic painting. She paused and looked up, to see her family looking back at her, including a younger, prepubescent Elsie. She stood next to her father, his hand resting on their mother's shoulder who sat on a stool, her long skirts smoothed neatly. At her feet sat her youngest sister Cecelia, who at the time of this painting was around three years old. This had been painted just weeks before Elsie's magic had revealed itself. As far as she was aware when she stood for this painting, in her sweet periwinkle blue dress and her dirty boots, she was her parent's heir and most prized child. Standing on the other side of her in the painting was her younger sister Evie, whose cropped hair and breeches made her look more like a boy than the daughter of a noble. Her eyes shifted to Lucetta who stood looking the most regal of all the Trevelyan sisters, in her dark emerald gown, looking as noble as their mother, but with the features of father.
"The happy family," a deep voice behind Elsie said dryly. She glanced over her shoulder and then whipped her head around in disbelief.
"Henry?!"
A tall man with dark wavy hair brushing his shoulders stood looking up at the portrait with a grin on his face. Elsie threw her arms around his neck and he lifted her up, hugging her like he used to when they were children.
Finally he set her down chuckling and she stared at him, feeling a massive smile on her face - the first genuine one in a long time.
"What in the world are you doing here? I thought you were in Antiva?"
He shrugged his shoulders - an action that was just so characteristically Henry. "Hey, I may not be a favoured family member, but I'm still a member of this family, I think. Bann Trevelyan wanted everyone here."
"Well I'm glad you're here," she grinned, elbowing him, but he was looking up at the painting again. After a moment she said "I still can't believe you weren't included in this portrait."
"Lady Trevelyan would rather pretend I don't exist, and, for most of the time, I'm content with that." He shrugged again, brushing it off. "I'm pretty sure these official portraits are meant to show the family at their best, not their worst."
"You're not the worst by any means," she shook her head. "Besides, if there was to be another portrait done today, I wouldn't be included."
"The mage and the bastard - what a scandal," Henry took her hand and looped it into the crook of his elbow, and they walked slowly down the hall together. "Anyway, what's it like being lawless, living on the run? Not knowing where your next meal is coming from?"
"Hmm, yes because you're a complete stranger to that lifestyle choice," she chuckled.
"Alright - in all seriousness, you know what I mean."
"You? Serious? Henry, I don't think I know you anymore. Antiva has changed you," she said in mock disgust, wrinkling her nose for effect.
He threw his head back and laughed, his voice echoed down the corridor. "Indeed it has. But I have missed you, little sister."
They walked down hallways and corridors until more voices could be heard. Elsie gently removed her hand from Henry's arm as they approached the drawing room. An elven servant stood ready to open the door and announce them. Henry and Elsie exchanged a glance before the doors opened for them to enter.
"Announcing Enchanter Elsie Trevelyan of the Ostwick Circle of Magi and Henry FitzLeland Trevelyan."
They stepped in together and the room fell silent. Large thin windows overlooked the gardens and immaculate Orlesian and Marcher items furnished the room. There were several sofas, chaises and armchairs positioned by the fireplace where the rest of her family were gathered. Not since before Elsie was sent to the Circle have so many Trevelyans been in one room. Half of them she didn't recognise, but most wore Chantry robes. There were a few cousins, aunts and uncles, but she didn't know their names - indeed, they probably only know her as the mage who lived in the Circle, and Henry as the troublesome bastard.
Elsie spotted Lucetta perched on the edge of a sofa, and made her way over to her, hoping to just slip into the group. But she didn't go unnoticed, when her youngest sister Cecilia bounced up to her and almost knockedElsie over with a hug.
"El! You're here!" She squealed, squeezing her tightly. Elsie hugs her in return, feeling a room full of eyes upon them. "And Henry!" Cecelia gave him a brief hug too, her bright smile lighting the room.
But Cecelia was oblivious to any discomfort and took a step back, holding Elsie's arms and looked up at her, as if memorising her face. Elsie did the same in return and for the first time in almost four years, looked down at her youngest sibling who was barely eighteen and already a Chantry Sister. The white and red robes suited her complexion and her light brown hair was tucked neatly under her hood. Elsie reached out and tucked a stray strand of hair away, feeling a warmth spread in her heart to have two of her sisters and her brother in the same room once more. It was fair to say that they all had a soft spot for Cecelia with her contagious and bubbly personality. She had obviously meant to do Andraste's work in the Chantry for she shared the Holy Lady's mantra with a kind and gentle heart as any could ask for.
"We've all missed you so much!" She continued, holding Elsie's hand and leading her over to the sofa where Lucetta was perched. But her chest thudded almost painfully when she saw her mother in the armchair next to Lucetta, sipping tea through her thinly drawn lips.
Without a doubt Elsie had been her favourite. Lady Bette Trevelyan had high hopes for her and the family until her magic appeared. Indeed, she was pretty sure it is because of Bette Trevelyan that Elsie's room remained the way it was. Although she was her mother, there was no doubt that she still resented Elsie for the little scandal her magic caused - the eldest child and heir to the Trevelyan estate, a mage? Her dear mother had never been so humiliated, even when the existence of Henry was made public.
Elsie inclined her head. "My lady mother," she said politely, remembering protocol she had not practiced for many years. Whenever she was allowed a short visit home, her mother was hardly ever around to see her, let alone talk to her. Always had another party or soiree to attend.
"Enchanter Trevelyan," Bette Trevelyan replied stiffly, placing emphasis on her title and looking at her dirty robes. "'Enchanter' of what now, I wonder?"
"Mother, please…" Cecelia begged quietly and Lucetta looked away.
Elsie placed a hand on her hip. "It's alright Cece - if our lady mother has something to say, I would like to hear it."
Her chest thudded at her boldness, and the room around them hushed. Bette Trevelyan stood gracefully, teacup and saucer still in hand. "It is shameful how far the lowest of the Maker's children have fallen, and now this - to think they could fall any lower."
Elsie visibly bristled, and clasped her hands before her to stop them shaking. "Yes, thank you mother. Lest we forget that I am one of your daughters."
"Something I pray for guidance on each and every single day," she retorted.
"The Maker-" Cecelia began but a warning look from Bette Trevelyan silenced her. Indeed, it was a look that could silence a Blight, if she so willed it.
"To think," her mother continued, "that those who are cursed with magic, who have been given good and kind shelter by the honest and faithful, dare rise up against their so-called 'injustice'. You have no idea how fortunate you were, how lucky that you're all not killed or instantly made Tranquil."
It was like a kick in the ribs for Elsie to hear her own mother speak so forthright about who she was - what she was. She took a steadying breath. "Magic exists to serve…" she began, with a few agreeable nods around the room from family members.
"This is not serving!" She exclaimed and Elsie stared. Never had she seen her mother - the woman who is always so composed, eloquent and careful with her words - so unhinged.
"That's quite enough," a deep voice cut through. They all turned to see Elsie's father Bann Leland Trevelyan in the doorway, a younger woman at his side in full Templar armour. It took Elsie a few moments to recognise that the woman was her other sister, Evie.
Elsie and Evie looked at each other from across the room, as if sizing one another up. Evie had cropped dark hair and a slight limp when she walked into the room. She also had a huge scar from her left brow, down to her cheek, which narrowly avoided her eye. They hadn't seen one another since Ostwick fell almost eight months prior. Elsie looked at Evie uncertainty as her templar sister walked into the room with their father, who ushered the rest of the family out, so - for the first time almost fifteen years - it was the immediate Trevelyan family only. Bann Trevelyan, his wife and the four Trevelyan daughters. Even Henry was shown out, although Elsie dearly wished he could've stayed: mages were bastards in their parents eyes. Great Aunt Lucille lingered by the doorway, but with a polite nod from her nephew their father, the socialite aunt reluctantly took her leave also.
The servants left the room also, closing the door behind them, and silence enveloped them. Their mother was the first to move, striding across the room to fold Evie into her arms. Evie barely returned the embrace, her eyes were still fixed solely on Elsie. When they broke apart, the rest of the family looked between Elsie and Evie, and it seemed as if they were collectively holding their breath.
After a moment, Cecelia was finally the one to break the silence by hugging Evie just as tightly she did Elsie and Henry. 'I've missed you so much! Look, Elsie is here too!"
"Yes, I can see that," Evie said quietly. Elsie took a step forward, wringing her hands together.
"How have you been?" she asked softly.
Evie pointed to her scar. "Could be better, but could've been worse," she replied. Her voice was flat, devoid of emotion.
Despite the circumstances, Elsie felt the corners of her mouth twitch as she pointed to her own scar. "Same here."
Before either of them could say another word, their father cleared his throat and ushered us to the table at the centre of the room. They each took a seat and Elsie carefully positioned herself next to her father and away from her mother. Lucetta sat on the other side of Elsie, folding her hands in her lap, her chin held high. It was more like a business meeting, not a catch up of family members.
An elven servant entered with a tray of Antivan coffee and served us in silence. Elsie couldn't help but watch how his hands trembled as he served their mother. She felt uncomfortable and shifted in her seat - Elsie had forgotten how the elves are second-class citizens and alienated in upper society. In the Circle, race and gender hadn't mattered, and all were equal and judged purely on skill and talent. She couldn't help but think of her friends who were elves in the Circle. She wondered where they were now. But Bann Trevelan interrupted her musings before she could dwell further.
"I'm not going to beat around the bush, let's get straight to the point," he said, clasping his hands together. It had been a long time since Elsie had seen her father in a meeting situation like this - not since before her magic appeared - and she'd forgotten how easily Bann Trevelyan could command a room. He had their undivided attention, although Elsie did find her mind wondering when she saw that his once auburn hair was now thinning and silver at the temples. Her father was aging well, but without a doubt, he was aging. And that fact made Elsie feel a little nostalgic from her life before the Circle. Despite not being part of one now, that life she had before could never come back - Lucetta had that privilege now.
'We are in a unique position," Leland was saying, and held up a letter. "I've received a message from the Divine, requesting our presence as she holds a conclave to end the war."
Evie and Elsie looked at each other across the table. "Are the mages willing to listen?" Evie says. Elsie bit her tongue and held off a retort and instead looked to Bann Trevelyan for an answer.
"Both Grand Enchanter Fiona and Lord Seeker Lucius are requested to attend," he said carefully, spreading his hands.
Elsie cleared her throat. "I've already received word that a great number of mages will be attending," she said, thinking of my contacts in the apostasy underworld. Who knew two years ago that I would know such people? She thought.
Lady Bette Trevelyan narrowed her eyes. "Is that so?" she sniffed, taking a sip of coffee through pursed lips.
"Bette," Leland Trevelyan said quietly. She nodded and remained silent, but glared at Elsie over the rim of her cup.
"So we need to decide who will attend on behalf of the Trevelyan family?" Lucetta confirmed.
Bann Trevelyan nodded. "I believe that I should attend but my duties and my... health keep me here." Elsie shota glance at Lucetta but she shook her head. Their father's health? A question for another time, Elsie thought. "It's a long way to where the Divine wants to hold the Conclave."
Lucetta glanced over the letter. "Haven? Where is that?"
"It's a remote village in Ferelden, in the Frostback mountains," Leland replied.
"The Temple of Sacred Ashes," Cecelia said in an awed whisper. "That's the village near the temple that was rediscovered during the Fifth Blight by the Hero of Ferelden."
"Ferelden is an awfully long way," their mother sniffed. "But we must bid to Most Holy's calling..."
"I will attend," Lucetta said, but Leland shook his head.
"No, I need you here to help run the estate, as you well know."
"But father-"
"Perhaps Lucetta should go, as she's the heir?" Bette chipped in, but they all started talking over each other.
Elsie watched them disagree and sargue, with even Cecelia saying her piece. Finally Elsie stood but was ignored. She waited another moment before summoning a small but powerful ball of fire into the palm of her hand. The crackling and heat of the flames halted their discussion immediately and they all looked at her, startled.
"Let's not forget what I am," she said evenly. "Nor what this war is about. The solution is simple - before the Circle fell I was a respected teacher to apprentices and I wished for no part in the rebellion… but I won't deny that after being on the run I am sympathetic to their cause." She took a breath and extinguished the ball in her palm. "Evie is also a Templar, who, I believe is also respected within the Order, or what's left of it. And we are sisters from a noble house - we must attend together."
"And show a united front - of course. Elsie, you're brilliant," Leland beamed.
Evie looked at Elsie warily. "I see your point, but we're not exactly best friends, are we?" she said cooly.
We were once, she thought and tried to ignore the wrench in her gut at the thought. They had been so close - Evie becoming a Templar was mainly so they could stay close to one another.
"It hardly matters now," she said, more to herself than to anyone. "We need to be on the same level when at the Conclave to help with the talks. Perhaps that's the best way we can find a solution... or a compromise at least."
"You're right Elsie, of course you are. And Evie, are you willing?" Their father asked.
They all looked over at her but she stared down at her cup of coffee which she hadn't touched. "The Order is not what it was when I joined," she said finally. "I daresay that I agree with Enchan- Elsie." She said, meeting her gaze. "I suppose we should travel together?"
To their surprise, Elsie shook her head before anyone could answer. "No, we should go separately by meeting at the Conclave, perhaps a day or two apart from one another. That way I can arrive with some of my contacts who will never know of the conversation that's transpired here - the same for you too."
Evie nodded. "That makes sense."
"We also wouldn't want to anger anyone by thinking that you're my guard and I your prisoner."
"Oh come now, it was never that bad," their mother interjected, rolling her eyes. "You we're lucky to be in a place of study, to atone for your Maker-given sin in a safe environment provided by the diligent and brave Templars"
Anger licks Elsie's stomach and she glared at Bette across the table. "That's rich, considering you've never stepped foot within a circle", she retorted.
"Not this again..." Lucetta mumbled. But Elsie ignored her and both Elsie and Bette opened their mouths but Cecelia stood, knocking the table and making all the cups clatter.
"Stop it, both of you!" She exclaimed. Elsie looked away, ashamed to see the tears welled in the corner of her eyes. "For the first time we're all together - can we not just get along for once?"
"You're absolutely right Cece," Elsie said, sitting back down. "But I shan't apologise for speaking truths."
"Alright now that's enough," Bann Trevelyan said in a tired voice. "Cecelia, you'll be accompanying your sisters to the Conclave - Divine Justinia has requested your presence by name."
Lady Bette Trevelyan's anger disappeared instantly as she clapped her gloved hands in delight. "Oh, how marvellous! Cecelia dear, this will work wonders for your progression within the Chantry."
Cecelia bit her lip and nodded humbly, but was Lucetta who spoke, "You didn't have anything to do with that, did you mother?"
An unbearably smug expression crossed Bette Trevelyan's face. "I may have said the right words in the right ears…"
"Thank you, mother," Cecelia finally said. "I am most honoured to attend and see the Temple of Sacred Ashes for myself."
"Remember that it's not just a pilgrimage my dear, but an opportunity for you and this family."
Elsie tried not to roll her eyes. Trust my mother to capitalise on the chaos.
"Cece can travel with me and the Templars," Evie said.
"There's no need - she can come with me," Elsie replied quickly, not trusting her sister's Templar contacts. If they were anything like some of the templars at the Ostwick Circle, then no one would be in their right mind to trust their little sister with them
"What, and travel with your fellow rebel mages?" Evie snorted. "Any of them could be abominations or practice blood magic."
"I can protect her from other mages if needs be," she replied calmly. "And I can move undercover much easier than you."
"Magic turned to a noble purpose indeed," their mother sniffed.
But Elsie ignored them and turned to her father. "I can protect her from renegade templars and mages alike," she said.
"How about we let Cecelia decide?" Lucetta said from beside her. So they all turned to look at the small buck-toothed little sister expectantly. She reddened under their gazes and avoided any eye contact.
"I don't want to be a problem..." she mumbled.
Bette tutted impatiently. "Then choose, darling."
Cecelia nodded more to herself than to their mother's words. She spread her hands. "I feel I ought to go with Elsie."
"As you wish," Evie said stiffly.
"Don't take it personally," Elsie said, trying to lighten the mood. But Evie just looked at her, her lips pursed in an expression that mirrored their mother's.
There was a pause before Leland stood. "Well then, that wasn't too painful now, was it?"
"Father, I'll help make arrangements if you wish," Lucetta said, also rising.
"Thank you dear, yes that would be a good help. I shall reply to the Divine at once with our plan".
"Thank you, father," Evie said, and Elsie echoed her words. The elven servant pushed open the doors and Bann Leland Trevelan left with Lucetta in tow. Elsie looked around the room to see her remaining sisters talking to one another and her mother calling the rest of their relatives back into the room.
Henry lingered in the doorway and offered her a smile. As the family mingled and chatted, the two outcasts remained by the door and surveyed the room, like wallflowers.
"The mage and the bastard," he sighed.
"The mage and the bastard," Elsie repeated but smiled and turned to him. "So! Tell me all about Antiva…"