A/N: Hi guys! Hope on board the angst train because this is a one way ticket and there's no getting off! This is a multi-chapter story about Rose Red, you know, if she would have ever been introduced in the show. Except this is going to be a dark fic, but there won't be any scenes that are rated M so we're good.

Hope you all like it!

Disclaimer: I don't own anything!

"When you bury the pain…You only strengthen its roots"

-Unknown

~Prologue~

I coughed violently as someone tossed me carelessly onto the beach. The usual soft sand felt like hard protruding rocks against my body, and I felt as though I couldn't breathe. I began to choke on nothing since I still couldn't take in any air. Water had filled up my lungs, and I pulled myself up to my knees, while my hands sunk into the sand.

I heaved out water, not sure of where I was because all I was doing at the present moment was concentrating on how to breathe again. I told myself to carefully breathe in and out, and my double vision began to subside. I could hear the crashing sounds of the waves hitting the jagged rocks by the beach.

"You are too predictable, Rose…"

I stared into the darkness of the forest-like jungle, trying to register what the voice was telling me. It was especially hard considering I was just on the brink of death.

I hadn't wanted to die – but it felt like it would have been the better alternative than to be here with this grueling teenager.

The all too familiar voice of Peter Pan was enough for me to groan out loudly. This only caused him to chuckle, and he sat down beside me while I continued to cough up the remaining water from my lungs. My eyes began to water, but I knew that they would only burn if I rubbed them. My hands were currently coated with sand and salt water from the ocean. Not to mention there was still some dirt underneath my nails.

My nose started to run, and my long red hair stuck to the green tunic that I was forced to wear. All of the clothes felt three times as heavy, and it was just a reminder for myself that I hadn't made it to freedom – I was still bound to him. That thought filled me with annoyance and I felt a stab at my confidence.

I hated the feeling that nothing I would do would ever make a difference. No matter how often I tried to leave, there would be no end. We would always end up back here again, and he would always stand triumphant.

I started to shiver when the night's breeze touched my drenched, cold body.

"I would have thought that you'd wait a few nights after I told you about the mermaids." He let out a loud exhale in amusement. I could see him shake his head in mock disappointment from the corner of my eyes. I could also see a cold, dark smirk lingering on his lips while he did a small nonchalant shrug in curiosity. "You must be getting desperate."

Having enough with his belittling words, I lunged at him. I gripped his shirt with my hands with as much rage as I could muster and slammed him down on the sand harshly. To any other person it would have caused them to become startled and caught off guard. Yet, Pan would never think of me as a formidable opponent.

His eyes widened slightly at how quick I had moved, and then he laughed at my antics.

"Is that it, Rose? Are you getting desperate?" He asked, looking into my narrowed eyes. They couldn't seem to focus on one point of him – everything was turning red and my burning uncontrollable emotions made it hard to concentrate on one aspect of him.

I wanted to punch something – I didn't know what or who to be mad at.

All I knew was that I was beyond frustrated that all my plans - all my deductive reasoning behind them - was treated as though it was mindless. As though I was a child that didn't seem to know what they were doing. "Do you want to see your mommy so badly?"

I raised a clenched fist with my other hand.

It froze in mid-air, about to hit his face, and then it started to shake. I didn't know what to do, and for the first time in my life I never felt so helpless. I was useless and Pan knew that I was at my breaking point.

This was the first time that I had let him see any raw emotions from me. I was usually so guarded since if you expressed any sign of emotion when you were a knight of the royal guard…it was met with punishment. To show emotion was a sign of weakness, and I doubt that Pan thought any differently about his own pawns.

He must have been pleased to know that all of his mind games and efforts were now starting to take a toll on me. I was starting to give into him and it would only be a matter of time before I was his to shape and mold into what he desired.

The fact that I might never be able to escape from this place filled be with unmeasurable terror.

"I won't allow it," his tone was possessive, but was not unlike how he usually spoke. He was one of those that had to control everything. Even now that fact seemed to reign strong. No matter what I did, he would always be two steps in front of me. He would predict my future actions – he would made sure that I would lose.

I would lose….

And…

He would win.

His eyes flashed darkly, and it was then that I realized that I was still on top of him with my fist indecisively halted in the air. He smirked while bringing a piece of my long red hair behind my ear. I tensed at this action, but made no move to stop him. "I'll never allow for you to leave," he promised. I continued to remain frozen on the spot. There were too many emotions running through me to argue or act against him.

"You'll be here with me for all eternity, Rose," he paused, looking at me. I gritted my teeth together in reply. "How does that make you feel?" He taunted, knowing exactly what to say to keep the anger burning inside of me. Each word that he spoke sent another metaphorical log onto my fire. "Does it make you feel angry? Trapped?" He chuckled, and I looked at his dark eyes, taking in his words mindlessly.

I shook my head, and suddenly let go of him as I scrambled to my feet quickly. I backed away not wanting to listen to another words that came out of his mouth.

I shouldn't listen to him.

I had to block him out.

"Lost?" He continued, and I shook my head while covering my ears with trembling hands. I was scared of what he had to say – of the effects it would have on me. Already my mental defenses were becoming shattered.

"Does your endless defeat make you feel lost, Rose? Are you finally coming to terms with what you are?" I continued shaking my head and tried to swallow the unfamiliar emotion that was rising inside of me.

It wasn't rage, or anger…It was an emotion that I had never related to before. It was familiar to despair, but I knew that it wasn't just that. This feeling deep in my chest was something that I should have embraced. But, I didn't want to. Then, that meant that Pan would be winning in his game against me. Yet, at his next sentence, the horrifying emotion emerged tenfold inside of me.

"That you're an unloved, unwanted child who should have been better off dead?"

I let out a yell and fell to my knees. I couldn't even feel the sand beneath me anymore – it seemed like I was numb to everything. The grief that I was experiencing was unlike anything I had ever encountered before, and I began to feel myself slip away. Each precious guarded piece I kept of myself was being washed away like the sand to the waves.

Each flood of emotion was making me realize the cold, bitter truth.

"Shut up!" I yelled, shaking my head even more. "Shut the hell up!" I looked right into his eyes, now that he was standing in front of me. A grin of amusement was on his face – he had wanted to see me beaten down in front of him. And, despite the fact that I knew he wanted to see me this way…I reacted exactly the way that he wanted me to.

I didn't stand a chance against it.

He was centuries older than me and knew exactly which buttons to press. He knew what would set me off, and although in the past I had pretended that it never bothered me…his words would always have a lasting effect on me.

I needed to keep it together. I needed to restore the fragile pieces of myself to become whole once again. As long as I had my resolve to serve my queen then I would be fine. I needed to keep telling myself the illusions and deceit that I thrived upon to keep my sanity in check.

"I was wanted!" I argued, although my words sounded as empty and hollow as I was starting to feel. The lies that I spat out sounded pointless, and the disbelieving look that Pan was shooting my way did nothing but lower my confidence. "I did everything I was asked to do!" I reasoned. Not with him, but with the buried emotions that I had felt since I was a small child. They were coming up to the surface, and I couldn't stop them.

The lonely childhood that I had suffered.

Not being able to leave the castle under any circumstance.

Joining the royal guard when I was only ten.

Being forced to learn magic when I was twelve.

Trying my best to gain her affection when she never dared to acknowledge me…When she didn't look twice in my direction, and when she did, she scoffed and belittled me as if I were nothing but the scum on the bottom of her shoes.

"Mother did want me!" My voice was becoming quieter. It was becoming weaker and my bottom lip started to quiver. I took in a small breath as my next words were barely above a hushed whisper. "She did! She…" I trailed, finally coming to terms with the fact that all that he was saying was true.

She would push me away, and then she sent me away to train as a soldier. Never wanting to look at me, and then sending me away to learn magic by the Dark One himself just so I could become a better pawn for her to use at her disposal.

I never had a childhood – I had only learned on how to fight and serve my mother.

I never had a family.

I was unwanted.

I was unloved.

I was lost.

My clenched hands fell into the sand, and tears leaked freely from my eyes. I lowered my head in defeat, and my damp cold hair fell in front of my face. Somewhere inside of me I knew that the woman I was trying so hard to return to was never making the effort to find me. I had waited patiently, and then proceeded to wait anxiously for her since I had arrived to this island to come and bring me home.

But she never came…and she never would.

No one was going to save me from this nightmare, and no one wants to.

I was alone, lonely, and that's the way that it's always been - the way that it always will be.

I released a painful sob from deep within my heart and dug the top of my head into the sand. I wanted to disappear and rot into nothing. I wanted to curl into a ball and cry the night away. I finally came to the realization that I was living in painful deceit with false expectations. I wanted a mother's love so desperately that I pretended that I received it in some immoral way or another.

My life was just another thing that should have been thrown away – it was forfeit. Pan was right – I would be better off dead than living. I had nothing to live for and my entire life was based on the lie that my mother actually cared for me.

If she was even a mother at all.

I felt a hand on the back of my head, soothingly pet my hair. I froze at the action, not used to physical contact, or anyone sending sympathy – pity - my way. His fingers started to intertwine with the locks in an obsessive manner. He pulled lightly at the locks of hair, as though if he let go I would disappear on the spot.

"This is where you belong, Rose. I've been telling you this from the start…" His voice was soft, and he spoke in a knowing manner. I had wanted to be wanted for so long. I wanted a place to call home – I wanted people that cared. I just wanted to be acknowledged for the person I was – for the girl that I was.

The child that I was.

"You will forget about your painful past memories in due time. Then, you will realize that your place is to be with me. You're mine, Rose Red, and you will always be mine."

I stopped my ugly sobbing and went deadly quiet.

"There's no need for you to leave this island – this will forever be your home," Pan stopped caressing my hair and let go. "You will be safe here with me. For eternity."

Raising my head, I turned to look at him. "I…" He latched onto my hands, no doubt thinking that my next words would be that of submission. That I would acknowledge that he was right, and then he would win. I wanted a place to call home – but I would never belong to anyone.

I am not a piece of property to be owned.

I will never be a pawn again.

"I will never belong here," I spoke slowly, snatching my hands from his and standing up quickly. My confidence and resolution had returned to me again. I felt more determined to leave this terrible place than I had in a long time. "I don't belong here!" I raised my voice, causing him to narrow his eyes as he stood up as well.

I then lowered my voice to a serious tone. "And I am not yours."

"You are mine, Rose," He stated, his amusement plastered back on his face. He walked over to me and carefully rubbed the back of his hand against my cheek, which was covered in sand. I slapped his hand away with a quick flick of my wrist and continued to observe him intently with a stern, unwavering stare. He seemed unbothered by this action, as though he had expected it. "Whether it takes you ten days or ten years for you to admit that makes no difference to me."

He took a few steps back to let me have some space, all the while looking at me with an equally intense stare. I scowled and took a step towards him, my red clumped up hair from the water and sand swinging behind me. "I am a soldier. I am the Red Knight. I do not give mercy, and I do not bow to anyone."

We stared at each other, and then he smirked. "All knights serve a king, and I am the only king on this island. You will bow to me and you will come to accept the fact that you are mine. You will break and I will be the one to put back the pieces. I have all the time in the world to make it happen."

I walked away from him. I tried to ignore the threats and dark promises that he said to me. Even with my newfound resolve of escaping, the words that he spoke definitely sent shivers down my spine. I remained composed, trying my best to not let him see past my false bravado. "I will leave this island. You will not stop me."

I would leave Neverland.

That was the only promise that mattered anymore. And, I wouldn't do it to get back to my mother – I would do it to get back my life. To start living my life. I would be unbound by anyone and would be free to make my own choices for once.

I was strong.

And this time – I wasn't telling myself a lie.