Xylophobia: n. fear of wooden objects; fear of forests
"Pardon me, but do you have a stone cell here?" the newly captured prisoner asked, stopping both Hogan and Klink in the middle of their usual routine.
"Stone?" Klink asked. "No, but the cooler is cement."
"I respectfully request to be kept there."
Both officers gaped. "The cooler is reserved for punishment," Klink finally explained.
"It's better than the barracks."
"What's wrong with the barracks?" Hogan asked.
"They're made of wood, like the forest. I...don't like wood," he explained with surprising amounts of dignity.
Hogan and Klink exchanged looks. By silent agreement, they both knew he would be transferred fast.