The brunette groaned as a shaft of light shone into her eyes through the thin ,gray curtains that hung in front of large floor to ceiling windows that ran the length of the wall. She stretched out her limbs, arching her back slightly before twisting her body to the right and left, each turn releasing loud pops of tension from her spin and leading to a sigh of relief from her lips. She relaxed back against the soft mattress and fluffed pillows just staring at the ceiling with deep inhales and exhales as she found herself running back over the previous night's event which brought clarity to the reason she was in the unfamiliar room to begin with – it was then that her heart beat rapidly increased at the reality that there wasn't just a series of 'whys' to her being her but also many 'whos' – Rumplestilstksin who had once again tricked her using her own broken innocence, her mother who yet again attempted to rip away all she loved, and then there was 'her' – Arena.
Regina turned her head slowly to let her gaze fall upon the teenager beside her who still lay resting peacefully beside her nestled under the thick blankets, long eye lashes laying against lightly tanned cheeks that Regina found herself having to fight to not lean forward to press light kisses onto. She still couldn't believe this was real – that she remembered but more so that Arena was alive. Regina's heart sank sickly in her stomach at the memory of her baby's blue body, cold in her arms at the day of her birth but now she lay warm and glowing with life, chest rising and falling rhythmically as she slept. It was a miracle.
But it also was a nightmare.
They had been separated nearly forty years when the curse and her given age was taken into consideration – she had lived imprisoned to the imp for the entirety of her existence and Regina knew good and well he never kept anything without purpose. She felt nauseous as she ran through the option of cruel torture he could've put her daughter through before jumping deep into a pool of shame and tormenting questions.
How could she not have known the girl was alive? Regina had magic, how could she not feel the magic used to dupe her on the child to begin with? Was she truly so overwhelmed and exhausted that she couldn't use her brain and abilities?
How did she not discover that Rumple had a whole child living in his palace – she was there often, how did she not feel the presence of someone else within those cold, lonely walls? She had immediately sensed Belle, how could she not have felt her own child? Shouldn't there have at the least been a maternal connection that drew her to where the girl was hid?
Perhaps she wasn't a fit mother – Henry surely thought so and maybe he was right. What kind of mother , even with magic, can't hold onto the memory of their daughter forged in the passion of true love? How could she not have known Arena needed rescued and , she was sure , protected from Rumplestilstkin.
What if in time Arena had the same questions? Sure, now it was all shiny and knew but soon her thoughts would start to churn and when they did Regina feared they wouldn't be in her favor.
After all, who could ever truly love a monster like her?
Just as she was about to dive head first into a full out panic attack, the former queen was brought out of her thoughts by a soft sigh as the teenager beside her began to stir with tiny movements and a small yawn before her eyes fluttered open, blinking a few times before the picture of the woman beside her come into focus.
" Goodmorning Momma." The girl sleepily whispered.
" Goodmorning doll baby." Regina whispered back tenderly, reaching out to brush a few stray blonde pieces of hair from her daughters face " how did you sleep?"
" Mm good." Arena answered stretching out before asking " how did you sleep?"
Regina almost answered with her default answer of ' I don't sleep much' but then it hit her – she had slept well, for the first time in….years.
" Actually, really well." She finally got out the words with a tiny laugh of disbelief " I never sleep good like that."
" Maybe it's the bed." Arena shrugged innocently with a tiny smile towards her mother.
Regina didn't reply but instead took her daughters hand in her own, pleased when Arena naturally slid her fingers between hers and held tight.
The brunette knew her peaceful slumber had nothing to do with pillowtop mattress covers, expensive high thread count sheets or the satin pillow cases – it was the lack of a sunconcious torment, an unreachable grief in the pit of her brain that she couldn't quite remember but could fully feel. It was the loss of a child on the heels of the death of her lover in the midst of an abusive, loveless marriage hidden deep in the recesses of her mind that kept her up at night. A sorrow she didn't have enough whiskey to drown, a anguish no amount of restriction could starve. The reason Regina had slept so well was because the hole in her heart that had been erased from her mind was now not only remembered but filled with love – filled with the sweet angel who lay beside her.
Arena was the reason for her peace, she was the gift that gave her rest. Regina had her fears of course but fear without the extra weight of unhealable mental wounds was tolerable.
" How do you feel today?" Regina's forehead creased with worry as she look her daughter over carefully.
" Sore but a lot better." Arena assured Regina " I don't even know if we will need to call Blue."
" As much as I want to believe that…" Regina sighed closing her eyes a moment at the though " I want to take every precaution, I'll be taking you to Whale too."
" Whale tried to kill you, I'm not going to him." Arena retorted, face twisting into a deep frown as she remembered the scene that she had tried to erase from her memory a million times – the anxiety still crept into her chest when the reels of her mother being slammed against the door by with blood lust in his eyes went through her mind.
She considered herself a kind person but Whale was someone she truly hated and would not tolerate.
" Fine, we'll see if someone else is available my over protective princess." Regina teased playfully, chuckling when Arena rolled her eyes then the two shared a few moments of comfortable silence soaking up each other's presence.
A few hours later Regina stood in her own defensive, over protective stance as she watched a nervous Blue Fairy look her daughter over with an detailed eye, extending one hand to lift the edge of the girl's shirt to reveal the scars left by the tiger's claws.
" Poor baby." Blue winced, eye softening sympathetically at the teenager in front of her before extending her other hand out which filled with a blue glow causing a comforting warmth to fill the girls midsection as any internal wounds that were left were mended while also searching for any infection or sign of poisoning from Cora " it looks like your mother , thankfully , didn't dip her claws in arsenic or night shade – if she had I'm not sure we'd have quite the happy ending but…." The glow from her hand dissipated as she leaned to smile warmly into Arena's blue eyes " we got lucky this time – I can't erase your scars, but you're all healed up, good as new."
" Thank you Blue." Arena's grateful voice came to the woman before her.
" You're welcome princess…" The auburn haired woman softly smiled before hesitating as if she wanted to say something more, her gaze darting back and forth between the teenager and her stern mother who watched on with a careful eye " Your Majesty, may I have a moment alone with your daughter?"
Regina's brow went up in curious shock at the request, arms instantly crossing her chest in defensiveness.
" I'm sure anything you say to her you can say in front of me can't you?" The brunette countered suspiciously taking a step towards where blue stood by Arena's bed.
" I assure you it's nothing negative but…." Blue's eyes turned back to the young girl who hung on her each word, ocean eyes following her movements " it is an instruction just for Arena and….her future.."
" Moth if you think that I'm going to let you indoctrinate my child with whatever fairy words of wisdom your thinking of sharing to have her in your corner you've got another thing…"
" Momma please let us have a minute." Arena cut into Regina's building tantrum, causing both older women's heads to snap in her direction – something between hurt and surprise flashed across the brunettes features, she stepped forward to speak then stopped as if turning something over in her mind then straightened her stance and put her shoulders back " as you wish my dear."
With those words Regina walked out of the door shutting it behind her then pressed a hand onto the cool wood surface, taking a second just to breathe – her chest feeling tight with a familiar sense of panic – it was the same panic that had gripped her the moment Emma Swan had showed up at her front door, the panic of Henry pushing her further and further out of his life despite how she held on tighter and tighter. She knew it seemed dramatic to see Arena asking her to give them a bit of privacy a rejection but how could she not with all she'd endured with Henry ? Especially from the likes of Blue who she knew would rather her be locked up with a magic blocking cuff on her wrists than allowed to live freely with her daughter. What if she turned Arena against her? What if whatever it was that she was saying ruined everything that had started last night – what if she and Arena's relationship were blocked before it blossomed fully? The former Queen began to feel as if she couldn't breathe, she couldn't bear to lose another child, she was sure it would be the end of her.
But she didn't stop the meeting nor did she barge in because Henry had taught her a valuable lesson when it comes to loving people – holding on to tight won't make them love you, on the contrary it drove them away.
So outside she stood, tormented but determined to not let her own fears and insecurities be the reason the relationship failed.
Inside the room Blue sat down on Arena's bedside, carefully taking the girl's hand in her own, as she organized the words in her mind until her mouth was sure she was ready to speak.
" Arena you are a special girl." Blue began sincerely, her thumb brushing lightly against the back of Arena's hand that she held " you are powerful beyond what even you know yet…"
" You felt my magic?" Arena gasped as Blue nodded before looking toward the door nervously " I haven't told my mom yet…"
" I know…" Blue tilted her head a bit " you will in time but for now you must make me a promise."
Arena waited eagerly the rules of the vow the creature desired for her to make.
" That you will lean always into the light and not into the dark, no matter what or who…" Blue glanced towards the door then back to meet Arena's knowing gaze " tries to tempt you …Arena the light magic you posses is ,to be quite honest, almost frightening." Blue shook her head with a deep inhale " there is a special purpose for you, I can't quite put my finger on it but I can feel all the way into my wings…" She laughed lightly " promise me you'll stay in the light…that you will strive to heal and not hurt, to be truthful, to be kind and above all to choose love and others above all else and never, ever revenge."
Arena took in each word, heart pounding with conviction and knowing – from the moment the orb had left her palm she knew there was meaning to her existence despite how she'd doubted it in years prior.
" You have a gift, unwrap it with care and share it with good and for good and only good." Blue instructed firmly " stay in the light princess and one day you will be a magnificent, worthy Queen – a nurturing mother to our land…can you promise me that?"
" I promise." Arena agreed giving Blue's hand a squeeze that made the fairy beam.
" Good girl." Blue leaned over to press a light kiss to the girls forehead " now let's let your mother back in before she turns me to ash yes?" Blue winked causing Arena to giggle lightly before agreeing as Blue got up, walking to the door – smirking slightly as Regina all but fell into the room from leaning against the wood of the outside of the entry way " she's all yours your majesty, you have a good girl here – treasure her please."
" I assure you moth no one treasure Arena or sees her worth more than I." Regina snapped before softening slightly " thank you for your assistance today."
" My pleasure." Blue chuckled a bit before giving a nod to Regina then turning to give a full curtsy to Arena, an action that left Regina flabberghasted – the fairy had never except in title acknowledged her as the true ruler of the Kingdoms, only the UnCharmings, yet it seemed she was more than happy to acknowledge Arena as heir…it confused the brunette, she mentally noted to confront the fairy later on but for Arena's sake she would let it go for now.
" Good afternoon princess." Blue stated before leaving the room and home till it was once again just Regina and her girl.
" Did she say anything cruel to you?" Regina's strong façade melted into a doting parent as she rushed to Arena's side to sit.
" No momma, she was very kind." Arena assured Regina as she sat up in the bed, though there was a slight tense edge to her words – she worried what her mother would think of the conversation she'd just had…it was a direct warning to , if she were honest, not become like Regina.
Arena would never want to hurt her mother so she decided keeping the interaction to herself was best.
" She just wanted to assure me that I was safe from Cora as long as I was with you and that she would be keeping an eye out too for any signs of danger." Arena lied, instant guilt pang running through her chest " that's all."
Regina eyed her with little confidence in the explanation seeing as the Blue fairy had never described Regina in any positive light in either of their lives, but before she could ask more question Arena inserted a request to her mother.
" Can we go for a walk outside? I could use some fresh air…" She all but pouted, batting her eyelashes at her mother who all but melted at the action.
" I suppose but we can't go to far okay?" Regina relented as they both stood up from the bed " it will be good to get some sunshine though, won't it?"
" It will." Arena smiled warmly as she looped her arm through her mother's, leaning against her " I'm so glad I have you."
Regina wasn't sure what to say, she wasn't sure anyone had ever said those words to her or even felt such a way when it came to her. She had always felt like a burden and disappointment to her mother, a failure when it came to Daniel, a less than possession for the King and a fill in discount mother for Henry. To be told she was wanted and appreciated all but took her breath away.
" And I am so thankful that I have you angel." Her voice was barely above a whisper as any louder it would have broke.
She pulled Arena nearer to her side and pressed a kiss into the side of her hair as they made their way downstairs towards the back door.
And she was thankful…so very, very thankful.