Hi everyone.
Important things you should know about this story :
1. English is not my native language, so mistakes are likely to appear. Please point them to me so I can improve in the future :)
2. This story is a translation of one of my own fics I wrote almost 3 years ago, so it happens around 2017 and that's why Trump is still president of the US.
3. The original story is complete so this one will be as well.
4. This story contains Trump bashing.
Disclaimer : Hetalia is the property of Himaruya, not mine. I'm just borrowing his characters.
Despite his entire magic knowledge, Romania had the deep feeling that his life, or at the very least his physical integrity, was currently hanging by a thread. Russia had barged in without warning a couple of hours ago, obviously still fuming from whatever had happened during the last international meeting. Since his arrival, he was avoiding said whatever and beating around the bush, or in that case, around a bottle of vodka. More accurately, around the third bottle. Apparently, it took that much to convince Ivan Braginsky to finally loosen up enough to spill what was on his mind.
"Fucking slef-absorded brat..." he said while almost smashing the bottle back on the table. "How dares he mock me ! I could break him in an instant !"
"I take it there has been some trouble with America ?" Vlad asked with an almost innocent tone. He knew better than most how to deal with Russia's anger, but it was still a delicate feat to manage.
"He both challenged and looked down on me ! Saying that since the Cold War ended, I'm not even a pawn in the world chessboard !"
Romania safely chose not to answer. An angry Ivan, and a soon-to-be drunk at that, was basically the equivalent of a god of war waiting for a target to destroy. Even without his faucet, Vlad wasn't willing to take any risk, and as a result, he was left with no choice but letting Russia pour himself another drink while complaining about his rival.
"That unsufferable brat thinks I can't fool him anymore without him seeing it coming a mile away." He muttered.
"Alfred likes to brag." Vlad shrugged. "We all know that. I wouldn't take it too seriously, he always live to regret it. Like that time when he tried to prove that his wines were better than France's, or that his pizzas were better than Romano's." He remembered. Alfred had made a fool of himself both times, and it has been almost embarassing to watch. Food wasn't exactly his strongest asset to begin with.
"Exactly."
The sadistic smirk who came along with the word brought Romania back on Earth at lightning speed. The dark aura which emanated from his guest was starting to make him more than worry, but Ivan wasn't finished.
"I need to put him in his place. I'm going to deceive him so perfectly he won't suspect anything, and then I'll break him by revealing the truth to everyone."
"That sounds like a very complicated and ambitious project" Vlad answered.
The wizard was starting to feel trapped. Russia hadn't come to his house at random, he already had an idea in mind, an idea that required his input. Romania really, really did not want to find himself in a crossfire between Russia and America. However, Ivan had apparently already decided he would most definitely participate, and that his opinions on the matter were not going to be taken into consideration.
"It is." Ivan approved. "And, to ensure said project will end successfully, I am going to need your skills."
"I don't want to find myself in the middle of a battlefield between the two of you" the brown-haired nation answered immediately. He wasn't considering himself a coward, but getting caught in a fight between two of the most powerful nations on the planet ? No thanks.
"You won't have to." Russia said. He was even rolling his eyes, like it should have been obvious. "I just need a spell." He added with his signature innocent-but-creepy-as-hell smile.
Romania knew it when he was cornered with no alternative. His only way out of this inextricable situation was in the tiny hope that the spell would be out of his reach.
"Which kind of spell ?" he asked while praying for it to be impossible.
"Turning into a woman at will."
Vlad nearly choked on nothing. He was expecting a lot of thing, and this was most definitely not one of them. His reaction seemed to be quite funny to his guest, as he chuckled briefly.
"Bu-But... Why would you..." Romania sputtered.
"That is none of your business." Ivan cut off with a hard look and a dangerous smile. "So ?"
Romania thought about it for a couple of minutes. He knew a bunch of spells to disguise one's appearance, and a few that would allow someone to transform one's body completely, but it was for a short period of time. Theoretically, he could probably mix a thing or two to get to the final result. The wizard in him was thrilled at the unexpectingly interesting challenge, but the person that he was inside was still reluctant to do so for Russia's plan.
However, he had to admit to himself he didn't exactly had a say in the matter. And if he only had to produce the magical input, without being told anything else, he could still genuinely say he wasn't aware of what catastrophe would inevitably happen.
"I think I can create something that would match your need." He sighed. "But I'm going to need time to adjust it if you want to be able to turn back to your usual self at will and regularly. "
"How much time ?" Russia asked.
"I need to do all the research, plus the mixing and the testing... A couple of weeks should be enough." Vlad thought out loud.
"Then you will be able to do it in less. I'll be back in ten days." Ivan said cheerfully.
Then he walked out of the house, leaving a dumbfouded wizard behind him.
It took three full minutes to Vlad to get up, and when he finally managed to do so, he let out a deep sigh before turning in the direction of the hidden door that lead to his secret and personnal magic lab. He had work to do, and not nearly enough time.
-o-oOo-o-
Eleven days later, Romania was chanting a complex combination of not less than five different spells and enchantments. Russia was standing in the middle of an intricate pattern while glaring at him. It was a silent and deadly reminder that the wizard better not mess anything up.
When Vlad finally stopped and any magical energy disappeared from the basement, the taller nation gave a quick look at his body. He couldn't see or feel the slighest change.
"You need to say a word to trigger the shift." Romania said, a little out of breath, before Russia could start asking questions or harm him, or both. Most likely both.
"And what would that word be ?" Ivan asked with a dangerously sweet voice.
"Prelucrare. It can mean processing or remaking in my language." The wizard explained quickly. Even as his threatening guest was now pondering the information, he developped his decision a bit more, just to be on the safe side. "That way there's no chance of it happening at random in a conversation."
"I appreciate the thought." Russia admitted with his innocent smile. "Let's try it. Prelucrare."
He immediately felt his skin and bones thoroughly rearranging themselves. Surprisingly, it wasn't painful at all, more like a weird blurred sensation of his different body parts. It merely lasted for ten seconds before the nation could once again say everything was stable in his body. However, there was a number of completely new and unexpected feelings, especially on his hips and chest. He looked at Vlad, who quickly indicated the nearest room with a full-sized mirror.
Russia entered, closed the door, and whistled when he finally saw his new self.
My my...
Even his own voice surprised him. It definitely was a higher pitch than his usual tone, despite the obvious irony of the two single words pronounced. The Eastern nation scrutinized the reflection in front of him, genuinely curious of what a female version of Russia looked like. A charming-looking young woman stared back at him. She had long ash-blond hair, fine features, lilac eyes hidden under long lashes, and overall a beautiful face. Satisfied with that first examination, Ivan opened his long coat to look at the over modifications that had happened. His waist was thinner, his hips wider, and more than decently sized breast.
But more importantly, Russia could tell that in spite of his smaller height and more fragile-looking appearance, this new body was still strong and ready to fight if needed. The young woman turned around to spare a glance at her butt, smiled appreciatively and dressed up. She then went back to the main room, where Vlad was still recovering from his exhaustive magic performance.
"Prelucrare." she said with that new voice.
The nation's body instantly shifted again, and in ten seconds, it was back to its initial form. His eyes hold an appraising twinkle for about a second, then disappeared when he turned to face the wizard.
"I am satisfied with your work." he finally said, a cheerful expression on his face.
"Thanks." Romania breathed out. "However" he added very quickly, "I recommand not shifting too often. This enchantment is a delicate intrication of different spells and you probably ought to be careful. I'd advise not doing the entire back and forth more than two times a day as a maximum."
"That amount will be sufficient." Russia dismissed with a gesture. "I'll come back to you if I need anything more, and of course, you are not to speak of this little arrangement to anyone, da ?"
Ivan didn't even wait for an answered and left with his childish and innocent smile, very happy with the way his day ended. In the basement, Vlad finally let out a sigh, relieved that this entire thing was done. He glanced at the mess left after the ritual, and then dismissed it. He could always clean it up later, preferably after he'd have a good meal and a good rest.
And after that, Romania had every intention to avoid all meetings for the following months.
-o-oOo-o-
New York, UN meeting, nations' dedicated conference room.
As always, Germany was trying to keep the meeting on track and a sliver of calm and decency, and as always, it had more than limited results after the first half hour. It didn't matter how regularly he chastised everyone, the effects were not even lasting five minutes at best. To think that all of them had thought things would calm down after France and England, closely followed by Spain and Romano, had become an item...
They hadn't stopped bickering, far from it. The only difference was in how much time they spent out of the conference room, in much too private types of meetings, and how they therefore were ditching a solid fourth of each session. And that was without their delayed arrivals to said sessions, with dark circles under their eyes and marks badly hidden on their necks. Another side-effect had been the influence their demeanour had on other couples that went way back. Obviously, himself and Italy were not concerned. Feliciano had indoubtedly toned it down in terms of PDA during the last decades. A bit. A tiny bit.
Ludwig forced himself out of his thoughts, and raised his voice to be heard above the noise.
"Could everyone please calm down ?"
His intervention was followed by a brief and not absolute silence, but he was used to working with what little he had, and he repeated the agenda for what felt like the umpteenth time.
"For the last time, we are all here today to discuss the environmental turning point we are now facing. Since we only have one planet at our disposal" he added seriously, "we have no other option than taking care of it. A green transition is becoming more and more inevitable and as nations, we must be the first to promote it."
"No need to, we just have to find other planets !"
Almost every nation present in the room turned their heads in the direction of the one who just spoke. America smiled widely at everyone, oblivious of how depressed his colleagues were in front of his unique ability to spit seemingly unending bullshit. After a couple of second of complete and utterly done silence, France gave up and answered him with all the patience he could muster.
"Alfred, mon trésor, your land is the home of NASA." He said gently, like he was explaining a complicated thing to a small child. "More than any of us, you know we are barely able to see a few planets that might, maybe, be able to accommodate life. We have no way to reach them."
"Well, just let the hero build superhero robots and they'll take us there !" America shot back with an even bigger smile.
Francis pinched the bridge of his nose, unable to come back with anything after such an answer. He shot a glance of pure despair to his lover, who took the hint and sighed.
"Alfred, superheroes belong to fiction and that's final." England asserted.
"So is magic and yet you can use it !" retorted the younger one.
"Except that magic can't do much for both space exploration and giant robots, no matter what Hollywood says. Now, stop acting like an absolute fool and if you can't say anything helpful, just shut up."
America mumbled a few words of protest, but sat down in his chair and ignored the sneers of the other nations. He hated when his dad acted like he was a child again. He had grown up, was independant, strong, world's most powerful nation in almost everything, he was the best, he was a hero ! And yet, he was treated like a brat each time he opened his mouth.
For the rest of the meeting, and while other nations were suggesting ideas, he could feel the heavy gazes of his parents as soon as he showed a sign of interest or a will to talk again. His smile disappeared in a frustrated pout, but he did his best to keep track with the main ideas.
America only hesitated once to break his dad's command, when he made eye contact with Russia. His personnal nemesis had a mocking look on top of his usual fake innocent smile. Damn commie... but two could play that game. As a quiet way to get back at him, Alfred flashed him a smile. More precisely, the exact smile he had displayed when the Cold War had ended with the downfall of the USSR, therefore leaving him as the most powerful country on earth. America noticed with an obvious delight that it was still effective, as the violet eyes darkened with contained fury.
Germany called an end to the meeting at three, with a report that was almost a carbon copy of the past two days, with it being the International Green Week. Most nations chose to remain in their hotel room to grab some sleep or anything that wouldn't involve hearing annoying voices about the disastrous state of the planet.
America had suggested a walk to his brother and his fathers, but all of them had declined the offer. Arthur and Francis had already plans to watch a movie together, and Canada wanted to spend some quality time with his own better half, since Prussia had accompanied his brother for the week.
In the end, he went alone for his walk, explaining that the amazing hero he was didn't need someone else to have a good time in his own country.