"Hey," he said, lifting his head just enough to look up at her. "let's... break up"

Those four words were haunting Shika's mind. It was all she could think about and all she could do was try to endure the pain they caused. It had to be a crime for someone so young to experience such hurt, right? For her, life was over.

But wait, let me backtrack a bit before we get into all of that. First, let me give you a bit of a backstory into just who Shika is and the happenings that led up to this devastation.

Shika was born and raised in a village on the southern end of Japan known as Konohagakure. During her senior year of middle school, at the age of 15, she'd decided that at the end of the school year she'd apply to UA High school in Musutafu for the hero program. Her kekkei tota (later, she found out, to be known as a quirk) is particle release. Particle release is known little outside of her small part of Japan.

It's last known wielder was old Onoki, third Tsuchikage of a village allied with hers called Iwagakure. He'd passed long before her birth so the only things she'd had to help her master her quirk were some old scrolls given to her from Iwagakure about Onoki, his fabrications Ku and Kako and detailed information on the kekkei tota itself.

But those old scrolls along with her own determination and willpower pushed her to become one of the most powerful weilders of particle release ever seen before.

Now, I know that with a name like particle release you must be thinking that she ended up with some lame, useless quirk. Well, not exactly. Far from it actually. Being a nature quirk, particle release gives a person the ability to manipulate not only earth, but fire and wind as well.

Not only that, but she can form 3-D shapes in her hands out of the energy stored in her body and once released it expands and shoots toward her target.

Anything that passes through the object or is passed through by the object is instantly destroyed on a molecular level. So, yeah, her quirk can be pretty dangerous. Not only could a person die, but they would literally cease to exist.

That's why, for the most part, she focuses on the elemental nature aspect of her quirk. She only uses the energy blast if absolutely necessary. It's too difficult to control and drains her.

But by the time she'd turned 14, becoming a ninja in her village wasn't as glamorous as it had been in the past and with rapid modernization taking place, tv and the internet had introduced her to the terms 'quirk' and 'heros'. That's when she'd first learned about the number one hero All Might and the prestigious hero academy UA high school.

Shika remembered wanting so badly to go to UA's sports festival that year and telling her boyfriend, Shikamaru, all about it much to his disinterest. After all, he was a ninja and wanted nothing to do with this hero business. Mainly because it was too glamorous for his liking. He said being a 'hero' was all for show and financial gain.

He'd never been one to want or need national attention, fame or fortune. Of course that was ironic coming from a guy whose family was loaded and who was hailed in their village as a genius ninja. There wasn't a single person in Konoha who didn't know the Naras.

After asking Lady Tsunade for permission to go to UA's sports festival and being turned down, Shika had conceded to watching it live from her computer. And that was the first time she'd seen the first year Togata Mirio...and consequently, his 'willie'.

She hadn't ever even seen a boy's 'willie' before, not even Shikamaru's so to say that she was flustered would be an understatement. Yeah, Mirio had placed dead last, but he'd certainly made an impression on her. One that Shika would never forget.

As promised to herself, at the end of her ninth grade school year, Shika secretly applied to UA online. She didn't know what to expect and everyday for weeks she checked her email for any news. However, things had begun to look grim.

Time rolled on and before she knew anything, a month and a half had already flown by. But then, just a few weeks before the start of the new school year, Shika was invited to participate in UA high's entrance exam.

Knowing that the hokage wouldn't agree, but having her mother's full support, Shika and her mom secretly took the trip to Musutafu. Upon returning they were both met with disapproval from Lady Tsunade, of course.

Though Shika is strong, her Kekkei tota was very rare and dangerous, meaning that others would do just about anything to get their hands on it. Leaving the village without at least one jonin level escort was dumb and plain reckless in the Hokage's eyes. And Shika knew she wouldn't be the only one who thought so.

She knew Shikamaru would be livid when he finally saw her. She knew he would've disagreed with she and her mom leaving the village, too, but not exactly for the same reasons as the Hokage. He couldn't care less about her ability or its rarity, he just cared about her and her safety.

She'd left in the dead of night without so much as a single word to anyone, not even him. She knew he'd be worried. She knew he wouldn't know what had happened to her, where she was or when she'd be back.

What she didn't know was that he'd pleaded with the Hokage to let him and a small team go out in search for her after finding out she was gone. But Tsunade refused. Her gut was telling her that Shika was okay and would return. Besides, she felt there was something much more important for Shikamaru to be concerned with.

Shika could feel how off the shadow-weilder was the moment she stepped foot on the back porch of his family's home. Shikamaru had never been one to explode with anger. No, instead his anger was silent, seething.

He rarely let anyone get under his skin enough to push him to that point of anger, though. It was a sight to behold. And while she wasn't sure that that's what she was feeling, just the thought of having that silent rage aimed at her made Shika's heart clench. She didn't like the way it felt if this really was it and silently hoped to never experience it again.

Shikamaru spared a fleeting glance in Shika's direction before returning his eyes back to the shogi board placed before him. He was playing alone, spinning the board after each move to play as his own opponent.

There was silence between them as she took a seat on the pillow lying on the porch opposite him; her eyes downcast, hands trembling. After a moment of hesitation, she looks up and their eyes met.

"Shika-pooh I-...I'm sorry," she chimed, but there was nothing. He didnt say a word.

Shikamaru only looked away, closing his eyes and laying back against the soft pile of pillows strewn about behind him. For a moment he stayed that way; eyebrows furrowed as if he were contemplating something deeply.

Then he finally opened his eyes. Staring up at the cloudy sky, Shikamaru sighed.

"Why didn't you at least tell me you were leaving?"

His sudden question caught Shika off guard, her own words now catching in her throat. She swallowed, but before she could answer, he spoke again.

"I went by your house looking for you. I called you. I even asked your neighbors. I asked everyone, but no one knew a thing. I thought-," he cut himself off, hesitating to continue. "I didn't know what to think. Three days, Shika. Where were you?"

Shika looked down at her lap. She was ashamed of herself, of her selfish actions. She'd disappointed the one person she never wanted to hurt. She'd seen him calling, saw notifications of his texts, but she ignored it all. He had no idea how bad she wished that she'd done things differently. But she couldn't.

With her eyes tightly shut, she answered. "I...went to Musutafu. I was invited there to take the entrance exam for UA high. Sorry for not telling you."

Shikamaru looked over at her then quickly looked away. He needed to keep his resolve. He couldn't give in to her sad face and pouty lips like he usually would. No, this was different. He had no choice in this particular matter.

"Does this hero program mean that much to you, Shika? More than our home? More than your own safety? More than...me?"

"NO!" She yelled, her loud words filling the silence and eliciting a stern look from Mrs. Nara from the kitchen window. With her voice lower, more under control, Shika continued.

"Of course it doesn't, Shika-pooh. You mean...everything to me. It's just-...I don't know. I just didn't want you to-" she trailed off, too nervous to finish.

Too nervous to admit that she didn't want to be distracted or discouraged...not even by him.

Shikamaru wasn't called a genius for nothing and he knew Shika better than even she knew herself. He knew what she wanted to say. She didn't need to finish. "Yeah...okay. I understand," he murmured barely above a whisper.

Shikamaru placed his arms across his face, hiding his expression from her. Shika sat there listening to him take long deep breaths. All was quiet otherwise. He was unmoved and he stayed that way a long while. Suddenly she heard him sigh again before pulling himself back up into a sitting position.

He thumbed at the hem of his t-shirt nonchalantly, opening and closing his mouth then opening and closing it again as if trying to find the right words to say, but couldnt. Then finally, he spoke.

"Hey," he said, lifting his head just enough to look up at her. "let's... break up"

So, now that you're all caught up, we can pick things back up from where we left off.

Shika sat in the window seat across from her bed, listening to the rain and holding onto her cellphone hoping that he would call. She'd drafted so many messages to send to him only to question it's validity before hitting the back button again. Tears streamed down her cheeks as thoughts of their conversation played on repeat in her mind.

"B-...but why? No, I don't want to break up," she choked out. Trying, but failing to hold back her tears.

Shikamaru couldn't stand to see her cry. He had to look away again, otherwise he wouldn't be able to go through with it.

"Listen, Shika, think about it; I'm a ninja and you want to be a hero. Our dreams are taking us in two different directions. We've-...we've grown apart. We aren't the same two people we were four years ago."

Shika tried wiping her tears away, to no avail, as she listened to the boy she'd spent the last four years of her life with seeming to effortlessly toss her away. It hurt...so bad. She felt like she couldn't breathe and no matter how deeply she inhaled, the air just wouldn't reach.

Her hand clutched at her chest desperately, trembling as it did. She tried using her other hand to steady it, but the shaking just wouldn't stop. This must be what it felt like to die, she wondered? A moment of silence lingered between them, but it was her shaky voice that finally rang through.

"Then...I won't go. I'll stay in Konoha."

Shikamaru looked up at her, shock rushed across his features in a moment of surprise. He studied her in silence a moment longer before frowning and looking away in defeat.

"No you wont"

"I will! I promise, Shika-pooh, I-"

"I'm leaving on an S-rank mission and I don't know when I'll be back! So...don't waste your one chance on me."

Shika was shocked. An S-rank mission? Wasn't that too dangerous for him? Yes, he's a jonin, but he was only 16. How could they allow someone so young to do something so dangerous? What was Lady Tsunade thinking?

"When?" she finally asked

"I don't know the specifics yet, but sometime within the next few weeks. Ino, Chouji and I, along with a few other jonin."

"Well, for how... long?"

Shikamaru shrugged, placing his head on the arm he'd rested on his knee, still not able to meet her gaze. "I don't know. The order is to not return until the mission is complete. Lady Tsunade mentioned that it could be... indefinite. So, I may never be able to come back to Konoha"

Before either of them knew what had happened, Shika had crossed the small space separating them, knocking the shogi board over in the process, and wrapped her arms around Shikamaru's neck. The force of which sent them both falling back into the pillows. Shika straddled the shocked boy, pushing herself up into a seated position in his lap. Her warm tears dripping onto his face as she looked down at him.

"Please don't go Shikamaru! Please! I'll stay too, I promise. I won't go away again. Just tell them that you won't do the mission," she pleaded.

Shikamaru could feel her small hands trembling as she gripped his shirt. Her thick, curly, dark hair hid her beautiful features from him. Only the silent lightning flashing through the sky offered him the briefest of glimpses of her somber expression.

Even her ever-glowing, warm caramel skin seemed dulled by her sadness and the dimness of the stormy sky. Shikamaru watched the disheveled girl above him, blinking only when her stray tears plopped against his cheek. This wasn't easy for him either, but he had to do the right thing.

"I can't turn down the mission, Shika. I'm a ninja. My job is to help those in need and to protect my village.The mission comes first and if that means making some sacrifices then so be it."

Shika couldn't believe what she was hearing. The mission... comes first? What nonsense? Slowly, but steadily her sadness began to morph into...anger. She was in disbelief.

"Hypocrite," she whispered

"What," he asked, but instead of an answer his face was met with the sting of her hand.

"Shika-pooh is a hypocrite!" She yelled before showering him with a barrage of emotionally fueled hits against his chest and arms.

"Hey, stop! Calm down!," he said as he tried to grab her flailing arms.

"No! How dare you question my loyalty to you knowing full well that you were leaving me anyway!"

"Stop, Shika"

"I won't stop! As bad as I want to be a hero! As bad as I want to attend UA, I'm still willing to throw that away for you! Yet you can't even refuse this one mission for me?!?" she yelled.

Shika quickly pushed his grasping hand away and pulled back even further, slapping him again. But this time she knew she'd gone too far. Her entire body froze when she saw the red liquid gathering at the corner of his mouth.

Shikamaru, however, didn't seem to notice at all. He paid no mind to the minor cut on his lip as he wrapped his arms around Shika, pinning her arms to her side. He held her there, listening to her heart pounding and her heavy breathing as she tried calming herself. He waited until he was certain she was okay and that her breathing had returned to normal before releasing her arms and pulling her closer.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry...I'm so sorry," he whispered, placing his forehead against her shoulder.

"No, I'm sorry," she whispered back, "for everything."

Moving his head ever so slightly, Shika could feel Shikamaru's warm breath and lips ghost against the side of her neck as he spoke.

"I was...irritated earlier and let it get the better of me. I took it out on you by placing all the blame on you. I'm really sorry. I'm just trying to do the right thing, Shika. Please...try to believe me when I say that I don't want to fight, but more than that, I don't want to see you hurt."

Shika could feel the sincerity in his words. She didn't fully understand what he meant, but she knew that his words had to be true. He'd never lied to her before, as far as she knew, even when it was something that she didn't want to hear.

Yet she still felt like there was something else; like there was something he wasn't telling her. Yes, she knew him and there was definitely something he couldn't tell her. And with that knowledge, she felt like her heart was slowly shattering into a million little pieces.

As gently as she could, Shika pulled herself back from Shikamaru's arms in an attempt to get a better look at his face. She'd hit him pretty hard after all. But the moment their eyes met, he pulled her into a gentle kiss.They'd kissed many times in the last couple of years since their first kiss, but this one was different. So sad, so somber.

And once again her tears began to fall.The familiar taste of Shikamaru's kiss mixed with the metallic taste of his blood and the saltiness of her own tears lingered on her tongue as she whimpered solemnly against his lips.

This was it, she realized.This was their last kiss. Their kiss goodbye.